That was a fun article.

Well, her body is a Temple.

Abe Vigoda concurs

...but is she living proof that she exists?

I don't know, she looks pretty dead to me...

Dear Mrs., Mr., Miss, or Mr. and Mrs. Daneeka:
Words cannot express the deep personal grief I experienced when your husband, son, father or brother was killed, wounded or reported missing in action.

I'm not dead yet!

I'm sure Rob Zombie would disagree

"Came here for Monty Python, leaving satisfi-"
"No you are in terrible danger."

Can't judge the situation until I've slept with her.

Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.

Gee, if she dies now, will they believe her?

The Death Panels are just getting started.

Oldiron_79: Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.

...go through their pockets and look for loose change.

Oldiron_79: Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.

...and what is that?

Dymesack: I don't know, she looks pretty dead to me...

Finished after Five!

Boo-YA! They keep on comin!

"Strongly suspecting an error, she protested, but..."
She wasn't 100% sure?

That story was sad. Especially the part at the end where it states the government has now listed her birthdate for 2009 so she won't qualify for Social Security benefits for 60 years. Haven't they screwed this poor woman enough? By the time the government gets their head out their collective ass and fixes this, she'll actually be dead.

trifecta in effecta

Mostly, "I think therefore I am" is enough proof that I'm alive; but sometimes, late at night (during the long dark tea time of the soul), "I think therefore I'm not" is equally plausible.

Dymesack: I don't know, she looks pretty dead to me...

Mostly dead.

Oldiron_79: Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.

Go through his clothes and look for loose change.

crycyr73: "Strongly suspecting an error, she protested, but..."
She wasn't 100% sure?

Sarcasmdetector.jpg

Simple solution; call Pat Robinson.
Fake a TV resurrection....

This crap happened to my grandmother, too. When she was about 70 yrs old, she was declared "dead" by the Social Security Agency, and they stopped giving her money. She went in with 3 children, and her birth certificate indicating that she was, in fact, not deceased. They wouldn't believe her...until (and get this)...she brought in the family's old Bible that had recorded in it her name and date of birth. Then they said "oops," and reinstated her. Took about a week.

The SSA is run by the dumbest people in the government, they can't hack it elsewhere, so they get moved to the SSA. A bunch of retards the likes of which you will never encounter anyplace else on Earth.

Carthax: Oldiron_79: Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.

...and what is that?

go through thier pockets and look for loose change

crycyr73: "Strongly suspecting an error, she protested, but..."
She wasn't 100% sure?

We can never be 100% sure of anything. Isn't that something Statistics taught us? Or science? I gave up on keeping those ideals in my memory, if someone would like to refresh them for me.

There was a guy on FatWallet that this happened to. He had quite a time getting himself resurrected until he called in and applied for his own death benefit. Apparently that shook them out of their rut.

Robot Devil's Advocate: Mostly, "I think therefore I am" is enough proof that I'm alive; but sometimes, late at night (during the long dark tea time of the soul), "I think therefore I'm not" is equally plausible.

i HATE those kind of nights.

Mad-n-FL: Simple solution; call Pat Robinson.
Fake a TV resurrection....

When the fundies say you have to be "born again", they usually mean just spiritually.

I can't wait until the same government responsible for this little bit of hilarity has full responsibility for my healthcare.