That's a really clever way of telling him to go fark himself.

this is why I check the "no substitutes" box when I order groceries online.

/I didnt order a cucumber!

Rubber dicky you're the one,
You make bathtime so much fun.
Rubber dicky I'm awfully fond you,
hoo be-boppty do!

"Your substitution was based on frequent visits to 4chan.org"

Actually, it was a mix up of orders. Somewhere out there some lucky couple is using bubble bath as lube.

And a small bottle of spermicidal lube?!

Astroglide and a slip 'n slide is a farking blast.

Just FYI: Bubble bath is very bad for little girl private parts. They'll get UTIs and even vaginal yeast or bacterial infections. Their urethras are very short and easily pick up the irritating chemicals, and bacteria take advantage of that. Little boys can have bubble baths, but little girls should not.

This is per more than one pediatrician.

"A FATHER of two was shocked when a supermarket delivered sexual lubricant to his house instead of the children's bubble bath he had ordered"

ZOMG!!!1 THE HORROR!

Catsmeow: Just FYI: Bubble bath is very bad for little girl private parts. They'll get UTIs and even vaginal yeast or bacterial infections. Their urethras are very short and easily pick up the irritating chemicals, and bacteria take advantage of that. Little boys can have bubble baths, but little girls should not.

This is per more than one pediatrician.

Wow. And this made news. Some people's lives must be just farking idyllic. In my world there's rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol to deal with.

Catsmeow: Just FYI: Bubble bath is very bad for little girl private parts. They'll get UTIs and even vaginal yeast or bacterial infections. Their urethras are very short and easily pick up the irritating chemicals, and bacteria take advantage of that. Little boys can have bubble baths, but little girls should not.

This is per more than one pediatrician.

Your pediatrician probably also told you that if you just have your little girl rinse thoroughly after a bubble bath, she won't have this problem at all. Remember doctors are only PRACTICING medicine. A little common sense goes a long way.

/has a 7 year old daughter who loves bubble baths

candiru.fish: Wow. And this made news. Some people's lives must be just farking idyllic. In my world there's rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol to deal with.

Rape. Twice.

EighthundredmillionthFarker: "A FATHER of two was shocked when a supermarket delivered sexual lubricant to his house instead of the children's bubble bath he had ordered"

ZOMG!!!1 THE HORROR!

So of course he showed it to the kids and told them why he was so shocked...right?

Yeah, I get the you-sure-are-Debbie-Downer stuff a lot. I'm a cross between Eeyore and Rabbit, and that's just how I am.

is it possible that a certain bear has a day job?

TorontoTonto: candiru.fish: Wow. And this made news. Some people's lives must be just farking idyllic. In my world there's rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol to deal with.

Rape. Twice.

TorontoTonto: Rape. Twice.

He likes rape.

/meh

candiru.fish:

Wow. And this made news. Some people's lives must be just farking idyllic. In my world there's rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol to deal with.


...which is why it would be a shame if stories like this one didn't make the news, too. Unless you actually enjoy full-time wallowing in rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol.

Weird things to have in your bag when cashing out in the supermarket:

1.- Baby Diapers
2.- KY jelly
3.- Condoms
4.- Dog collar w/leash

/You'll get some weird looks by the cashier

TorontoTonto: candiru.fish: Wow. And this made news. Some people's lives must be just farking idyllic. In my world there's rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol to deal with.

Rape. Twice.

sure, with a 15 minute intermission for the guy to recover of course.

Jenniturd: Catsmeow: Just FYI: Bubble bath is very bad for little girl private parts. They'll get UTIs and even vaginal yeast or bacterial infections. Their urethras are very short and easily pick up the irritating chemicals, and bacteria take advantage of that. Little boys can have bubble baths, but little girls should not.

This is per more than one pediatrician.

Your pediatrician probably also told you that if you just have your little girl rinse thoroughly after a bubble bath, she won't have this problem at all. Remember doctors are only PRACTICING medicine. A little common sense goes a long way.

/has a 7 year old daughter who loves bubble baths

Rinse? So you're teaching her young to use those shower massagers, eh?

/I'm so sorry.

candiru.fish: Wow. And this made news. Some people's lives must be just farking idyllic. In my world there's rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol to deal with.

Good God man, American Idol? I feel for ya. I just keep the TV away from that. Power to ya, bro! (or sis if you is a lady!)

Jesus Q. likes this.

The guy ordered a pirate bubble bath. Maybe they thought he was a pirate. Maybe they thought he was a butt pirate...

I got nothing, so here's Glenn Close with some carrots in her mouth.

Just FYI for all you American farkers, Asda is part of Wal-Mart.

/No, they don't check your receipt on the way out.

CygnusDarius: Weird things to have in your bag when cashing out in the supermarket:

1.- Baby Diapers
2.- KY jelly
3.- Condoms
4.- Dog collar w/leash

/You'll get some weird looks by the cashier

That's the easy version of the Take 3 game. You really should try for weird without sexual innuendo. Sexual is too easy.

Eh, the bubble bath/girl thing is probably true to some degree - as I've heard the same from several urologists while I was a kid / teen / adult. But I had surgery as a kid that left me predisposed to getting UTIs/etc... for everyone else once in awhile is probably not gonna hurt.

I always wanted a bubble bath as a kid. Never got one. Which is why I've had the occasional lavender scented bubble bath as an adult. So damn fun...

/sorry Doc

EighthundredmillionthFarker: "A FATHER of two was shocked when a supermarket delivered sexual lubricant to his house instead of the children's bubble bath he had ordered"

ZOMG!!!1 THE HORROR!

Use it for the mother.

candiru.fish: Wow. And this made news. Some people's lives must be just farking idyllic. In my world there's rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol to deal with.

You didn't say American Idol twice.

Having worked in a grocery store for 10 years I know I'm probably calling the kettle black, but the clerks who do the online orders are the absolute lowest common denominators in the store. They even make the baggers look like geniuses.

baltimoreblonde: EighthundredmillionthFarker: "A FATHER of two was shocked when a supermarket delivered sexual lubricant to his house instead of the children's bubble bath he had ordered"

ZOMG!!!1 THE HORROR!

So of course he showed it to the kids and told them why he was so shocked...right?

Customer *dials #*

Customer: Hi, I ordered "A" and you sent me "B"

Customer Service: Oops! Sorry about that, we'll go ahead and send you "A."

Customer: kthnxbye!

Gobsmacked. Smacked with gob.

DrBenway: ...which is why it would be a shame if stories like this one didn't make the news, too. Unless you actually enjoy full-time wallowing in rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol.

Well not so much the American Idol...

Gobsmacked!

Aidan: CygnusDarius: Weird things to have in your bag when cashing out in the supermarket:

1.- Baby Diapers
2.- KY jelly
3.- Condoms
4.- Dog collar w/leash

/You'll get some weird looks by the cashier

That's the easy version of the Take 3 game. You really should try for weird without sexual innuendo. Sexual is too easy.

So, the take other would be:

1.- Several gallons of water
2.- Canned/dry goods
3.- Lots of ammunition
4.- A book written by Glenn Beck

Off subject.

I was amazed to see cockrings at our local Target store.

If I could make a delivery for this bubble bath, then yes, I would somehow find a way to do it.

/NSFW
//Dear Penthouse Letters, I never thought I'd be writing this but ..

Lickable.

"Lucky Matey" sounds like it might be a Japanese brand of sex lube, and so maybe the grocery store wasn't so far off.

candiru.fish: Wow. And this made news. Some people's lives must be just farking idyllic. In my world there's rape, and famine, and war, and pestilence, and apostasy, and rape, and torture and suffering and American Idol to deal with.

Sticking American Idol on the end there made the whole thing redundant don't you think?

Gunderson: I got nothing, so here's Glenn Close with some carrots in her mouth.

They even make the baggers look like geniuses.

Around these parts baggers tend to be special people. Your phone order-takers must a real blast.

I do not phone order as I have dietary needs that I would not be able to convey - like I want a tomato, not some gooey red blob that has your fingerprints all over it.

Aidan: CygnusDarius: Weird things to have in your bag when cashing out in the supermarket:

1.- Baby Diapers
2.- KY jelly
3.- Condoms
4.- Dog collar w/leash

/You'll get some weird looks by the cashier

That's the easy version of the Take 3 game. You really should try for weird without sexual innuendo. Sexual is too easy.

Around halloween -

1. Apples
2. Razors
3. Sominex

Your Baby needs lube.

Catsmeow: Just FYI: Bubble bath is very bad for little girl private parts. They'll get UTIs and even vaginal yeast or bacterial infections. Their urethras are very short and easily pick up the irritating chemicals, and bacteria take advantage of that. Little boys can have bubble baths, but little girls should not.

This is per more than one pediatrician.

So, bubble bath which is a scented surfactant (scented soap) can cause both fungal and bacterial infections? However, taking a normal bath without it is fine and presumably won't cause infection?

Now I can see how as a function of TIME sitting in a container of non sterile water could cause an increase of infection. But yeah :P

Nightsweat: Aidan: CygnusDarius: Weird things to have in your bag when cashing out in the supermarket:

1.- Baby Diapers
2.- KY jelly
3.- Condoms
4.- Dog collar w/leash

/You'll get some weird looks by the cashier

That's the easy version of the Take 3 game. You really should try for weird without sexual innuendo. Sexual is too easy.

Around halloween -

1. Apples
2. Razors
3. Sominex

1. Pregnancy test.
2. Heavy duty garbage bags.
3. Wire coat hangers.