"Gimme back mah cookies!"

Could have been worse. Imagine what would have happened if they stole his clamcakes.

Did you see his teeth?

Meth.

Ernie the Elf disavows any knowledge of your shenanigans, sir.

sneaking into his house during the night and stealing seven boxes of "Little Debbie Oatmeal Cookies.

Oatmeal? Who would bother stealing oatmeal cookies?

/hates seeing a plate of oatmeal raisin cookies and thinking, "Oh boy! Chocolate chip!"
//such a disappointment
///does that guy have any teeth to eat cookies anyway?

Getting Really Old Really Sucks...

TsarTom: Did you see his teeth?

No.

In other news, we now arrest people for having Alzheimer's. :(

jestme: In other news, we now arrest people for having Alzheimer's. :(

But that poor door... It will never be the same again.. :(

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?

The real questions are: what is the neighbor's deductible on their insurance, and will the insurance company weasel out of paying, citing Alzheimer's as an "act of God?"

Hilary T. N. Seuss: sneaking into his house during the night and stealing seven boxes of "Little Debbie Oatmeal Cookies.

Oatmeal? Who would bother stealing oatmeal cookies?

/hates seeing a plate of oatmeal raisin cookies and thinking, "Oh boy! Chocolate chip!"
//such a disappointment
///does that guy have any teeth to eat cookies anyway?

Those Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme things are pretty damn tasty though (although personally I'm more into Fudge Rounds or the Peanut Butter Bars) They're pretty soft too, so I imagine a toothless, batty old man could probably eat them just fine.

Trying to beat down the neighbors door because you forgot you had bought 5 boxes of cookies and thought they had stolen 2 boxes. And at 80-years old and THAT hostile / absent minded.

A. Dude should be in a home or at the very least have a live-in nurse.
B. I hate word problems!!!! It's always MATH AARRRRGGHHH.

Having Alzheimer he will be a repeat offender.



/It is his new bait for the paperboy.
Of course he is going to get emotional when they are missing.
(Little boy, little boy, would you like a Popsicle? Little boy, little boy, were are you? This is starting to piss me off.)

Came for Lindsay Lohan reference, leaves disappo... Wait, I made one.

Hilary T. N. Seuss: ... "Little Debbie Oatmeal Cookies. Oatmeal? Who would bother stealing oatmeal cookies?

//such a disappointment

Little Debbies are soft nasty tasting preservative laden evil.

Chocolate chips are everything good.

Dad?

This sounds like a fairy tale.

mortimer_ford: This sounds like a fairy tale.

Elves. Who can predict what they'll make and what they'll take.

Wonko Fortytwo: Hilary T. N. Seuss: ... "Little Debbie Oatmeal Cookies. Oatmeal? Who would bother stealing oatmeal cookies?

//such a disappointment

Little Debbies are soft nasty tasting preservative laden evil.

Chocolate chips are everything good.

Agreed. You can literally taste the preservativey chemicals in those oatmeal things. Yuck.

Cowkitchen2: Wonko Fortytwo: Hilary T. N. Seuss: ... "Little Debbie Oatmeal Cookies. Oatmeal? Who would bother stealing oatmeal cookies?

//such a disappointment

Little Debbies are soft nasty tasting preservative laden evil.

Chocolate chips are everything good.

Agreed. You can literally taste the preservativey chemicals in those oatmeal things. Yuck.

I can sympathize with the poor soul, given he has no teeth and his brain is turning to mush and all.

/There but for the grace of the FSM go I. (In about 30+ or - 5 years or so.

I_Am_Weasel: Came for Lindsay Lohan reference, leaves disappo... Wait, I made one.

You did?

Cookie snob thread?

I hope when I am 80 I still have the ability to bash in a door with a hoe.

/goes to stock up on little debbies

Speaking of cookies, we got some Tagalongs this time around and I noticed they just weren't as good as they used to be. I thought they had cheapened the chocolate or something, anyone else notice this?
Samoas were non-existent though, completely sold out..
/sigh

That's no ho beater; buy this guy's book, "How to kick a ho in the butt." by Velvet Jones.

Who told you you could eat my cookies!?

/Put that cookie down!
//Now!

Approves of attack hoe's.

Hoe beater?

stealing seven boxes of "Little Debbie Oatmeal Cookies.
Well OK then...

First thing I thought of.