VERY nice headline.

/ +1

Well played.

Do we know that he didn't pull out of his mistress yet???

/+1

One Internets to you, subby. Nicely played.

So... , must include another item besides "Mistress" and "tournament" to get greenlit several hours ago. Got it admins..

/shakes fist.

He had sex with a black guy.

He shouldn't have pulled out of his mistress? Have you no manners, subby?

Was he afraid he would be attacked at the tournament by a fire hydrant?

+1

Nice headline, subby

Beautiful headline, subby.

Is it too late for Headline of the Year consideration?

/1UP

Yeah...the mistress part of the joke makes no sense. Sorry.

40below: VERY nice headline.

/ +1

Thank you, sir.

ummm... headline really doesn't make sense. So, he shouldn't have pulled out of his mistress? He should've stayed inside her and what? got her pregnant? Then his troubles would be over?

headline appears to be clever at first glance, but then when you actually stop to consider what the headline is saying, it fails miserably.

If this was a real headline from a media source, it would be submitted with the asinine or fail tag and everyone would be deriding it.

but low-hanging fruit will get this voted up and people will start clamoring hoty.

you are a puppet: Yeah...the mistress part of the joke makes no sense. Sorry.

Agreed.

Next time we see Tiger in person, he'll be singing "Music of the Night" near the 18th Green at Augusta.

/or he's flipping a two-headed coin deciding where to appear

Troy McClure: you are a puppet: Yeah...the mistress part of the joke makes no sense. Sorry.

Agreed.

You ALWAYS pull out of the mistress!

Troy McClure: you are a puppet: Yeah...the mistress part of the joke makes no sense. Sorry.

Agreed.

Nor does the tournament part. I don't see anything about him being penalized for it, or being in any kind of trouble.

Daily Tiger trifecta complete.

So then we all agree, should read:
Tiger adds "tournament" to list of things he has recently pulled out of, which already includes "driveway" and "mistress."

calbert: ummm... headline really doesn't make sense. So, he shouldn't have pulled out of his mistress? He should've stayed inside her and what? got her pregnant? Then his troubles would be over?

headline appears to be clever at first glance, but then when you actually stop to consider what the headline is saying, it fails miserably.

If this was a real headline from a media source, it would be submitted with the asinine or fail tag and everyone would be deriding it.

but low-hanging fruit will get this voted up and people will start clamoring hoty.


This.

At least I have the power to -1 this P.O.S.

astrotri: So then we all agree, should read:
Tiger adds "tournament" to list of things he has recently pulled out of, which already includes "driveway" and "mistress."

+1

He shouldn't have pulled out of his mistress? Huh? Do you mean he shouldn't have pushed in her in the first place? Your joke doesn't make sense, subby.

Wasn't he married to a ridiculously hot, swedish blonde, nude model/nanny wife with a twin sister? Learn to settle, that's my advice.

GimpyNip: He shouldn't have pulled out of his mistress? Huh? Do you mean he shouldn't have pushed in her in the first place? Your joke doesn't make sense, subby.

Well, I guess you could argue that he should never have put himself in the position to pull out (and put in, and pull out, etc.) of his mistress. But the point still stands. Headline is weak sauce upon further inspection.

you are a puppet: Yeah...the mistress part of the joke makes no sense. Sorry.

This.

he ejaculated all over his tournament's face

astrotri: So then we all agree, should read:
Tiger adds "tournament" to list of things he has recently pulled out of, which already includes "driveway" and "mistress."

Can we get it changed to this?

astrotri: So then we all agree, should read:
Tiger adds "tournament" to list of things he has recently pulled out of, which already includes "driveway" and "mistress."

That is how you make this joke work. The current headline is on the right track, but didn't deliver

Maybe he should have pulled out of the date with the mistress?

richardfitztightly: Maybe he should have pulled out of the date with the mistress?

Things he pulled out of abruptly?

Does anyone other than me think that Tiger's "mistress" looks like Steven Tyler?

I still can't believe he had to have a friend of his ask out Ellin for him. You're Tiger friggin' Woods, man! Step the hell up! You're supposed to be a role model, remember?

"Hey, my do you know my friend Tiger? He wants to know if you like anyone on the PGA...you know, as more than a friend..."

Pathetic.

There are parodies of this all over the internet, Fark needs a parody tab.

Wow douchey farkers, way to kill a joke with annoying "logic".

I love how this ass tard hates the negative publicity... when he is the one who put himself in the spot light. You can't make yourself a public figure (ads, sponsorships, etc.) then whine when the public notices the skeleton in your closet.

It's called: taking the good with the bad.

medius: he ejaculated all over his tournament's face

High-5!

o/

This is the dumbest story in the history of dumb stories.

TheJoe03: Wow douchey farkers, way to kill a joke with annoying "logic".

yeah reminds me of a guy from norway trying to correct me on a joke in english

Golf Clap, Subby!

D-Liver: Things he pulled out of abruptly?



undead johnny approves.

astrotri: So then we all agree, should read:
Tiger adds "tournament" to list of things he has recently pulled out of, which already includes "driveway" and "mistress."

this is a better headline than anything nominated in the Fark headlines of the year for 2009.

Ol Fart: Does anyone other than me think that Tiger's "mistress" looks like Steven Tyler?

she looks like a Pablo Picasso cubist painting.

I hate the submitter.

I admit it. I too had sex with Tiger Woods!

/book deal please!

Did not RTFA, but the headline is hilarious.

/Of course he shouldn't have pulled out of the Mistress... if he was still happily in bed, none of this would have happened