"That's just putting it next to somebody else," said Judd Nelson, 49, waiting to start a two-day bus trip to Phoenix.

Wow. I guess somebody has fallen on hard times.

Does this mean I shouldn't make that Whipped Swine Flu sidedish I was planning?

It's time that we got something straight.
We all share a quite common trait:
No reason to lie,
WE ALL GOTTA DIE.
There's nothing much left to debate.

All you people with friends and family mocked me. On Friday when you're all dead I'll be the one laughing.

What about Thanksgiving gangbangs?

Swine flu? Who serves ham on Thanksgiving? I would think that Bird flu would be more appropriate.

Also rapes.

Parents are gathering at my brother's house, with his seven children.

Yeah, no.

Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ. Fark the MSM and the "we're all gonna die" crap.

For f*ck's sake, it's the flu, not some sort of mutated super-virus developed in a government lab and released by accident. It will most definitely NOT turn us all into flesh-craving zombies.

/brains

Not to mention air travel.

Molavian: For f*ck's sake, it's the flu, not some sort of mutated super-virus developed in a government lab and released by accident. It will most definitely NOT turn us all into flesh-craving zombies.

/brains

Don't listen to this misinformation officer. The swine flu is real, it's everywhere, and it will turn you into a flesh eating zombie.

Molavian: For f*ck's sake, it's the flu, not some sort of mutated super-virus developed in a government lab and released by accident. It will most definitely NOT turn us all into flesh-craving zombies

That's what the government wants the sheeple to believe. The vaccine contains a microchip that causes docility, gayness, and makes the words on the pages of The Turner Diaries illegible.

Yeesh.

You know what else could give you swine flu? Going out in public. But you're not going to see me "pull a Howard Hughes" and stay at home 24x7, wearing Kleenex boxes as shoes.

CravenMorehead: Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ. Fark the MSM and the "we're all gonna die" crap.

MSNBC is completely idiotic. I log out of Hotmail and all I see is sensationalist news, celebrity crap, and links to stuff on Cosmo and Men's Health websites.

Kyro: Parents are gathering at my brother's house, with his seven children.

Yeah, no.

One more reason for the "kids' table".

RUN FOR YOUR LIVES

Molavian: For f*ck's sake, it's the flu, not some sort of mutated super-virus developed in a government lab and released by accident. It will most definitely NOT turn us all into flesh-craving zombies.

/brains

Would like to have a word with you

/hot like a sweet potato casserole

schattenteufel: Swine flu? Who serves ham on Thanksgiving? I would think that Bird flu would be more appropriate.

the return of avian flu?

Sir Roderick Glossop: The vaccine contains a microchip that causes docility, gayness, and makes the words on the pages of The Turner Diaries illegible.

Wot Ho, Sir Roderick! And what does it do for docile, gays with keen eyesight like my valet, here?

And with any luck it'll take out some of the relatives I don't want to see this Thanksgiving.

Fano: Also rapes.

You only said rape once ...

Eh. Somebody pass the ham, please.

soooooo, more for me on black friday?

Stormneedle: Eh. Somebody pass the ham, please.

Would you like bacon-covered or non-bacon-covered?

Just remember, the flu virus vaccine is actually a plot by the visitors to take over the planet.

I'm not too concerned. I'm vaccinated against both seasonal and swine flue.

Sir Roderick Glossop: That's what the government wants the sheeple to believe. The vaccine contains a microchip that causes docility, gayness, and makes the words on the pages of The Turner Diaries illegible.

You're wrong there. The swine flu was created by the previous adminstration in an attempt to kill younger people, who tend to be more liberal, but since they were so incompetent, the current adminstration with the help of the CDC and scientists were able to create a vaccine that disables the swine flu.

/ I had trouble writing that since it was so absurd.
// Almost fell on the floor laughing.

47 is the new 42: but since they were so incompetent

I should make it clear that I meant the previous administration was incompetent.

/ The entire thing I wrote is still absurd, except for the previous adminstration's incompetence.

47 is the new 42: I'm not too concerned. I'm vaccinated against both seasonal and swine flue.

Sir Roderick Glossop: That's what the government wants the sheeple to believe. The vaccine contains a microchip that causes docility, gayness, and makes the words on the pages of The Turner Diaries illegible.

You're wrong there. The swine flu was created by the previous adminstration in an attempt to kill younger people, who tend to be more liberal, but since they were so incompetent, the current adminstration with the help of the CDC and scientists were able to create a vaccine that disables the swine flu.

/ I had trouble writing that since it was so absurd.
// Almost fell on the floor laughing.

It does sound pretty silly, thinking the two administrations actually have different goals from each other.

But seriously, the vaccine is being giving out to shrink penises and thus make a fortune for penile enhancement companies.

vort3xxx: What about Thanksgiving gangbangs?

LOL. I like the cut of your jib.

Good thing my family (healthy husband, 18-month-old, and pregnant me) all got type A influenza two weeks ago.

Can I get an AMEN?!

/it farking blew

HawgWild: Fano: Also rapes.

You only said rape once ...

Not a big fan of rape I guess.

bambi121899: Good thing my family (healthy husband, 18-month-old, and pregnant me) all got type A influenza two weeks ago.

Can I get an AMEN?!

/it farking blew

and if YOU blew, you wouldn't be pregnant now, would you?

/sorry, couldn't resist
//remember, if you get called out for pigging out tomorrow, tell them that you're eating for two so STFU

I am trying to believe (new window).

Godscrack,

I came to post Rick Romero but after seeing yours It would be a little weak by comparison.

Why are they still going on with the scare tactics? Haven't they sold all the vaccine yet?

/gullible people are gullible.

note to self, hold thaksgiving in madagascar this year.

/disease spotted in madagascar

You know I don't get all this silly hype and panic. What makes this "Swine Flu" any different than the regular flu?

Actually stupid, brain dead submitter first comes to mind.

\Intellectual idiots. The US medical machine and its flying monkeys.

Jesusaurus: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES

do i also have to RUN TO THE HIIIIIIILLS.

Can we get a "fearmonger" tag?

Cytokine Storm: You know I don't get all this silly hype and panic. What makes this "Swine Flu" any different than the regular flu?

Bravo sir, Bravo.

Good thing I got the shot then.

eddyatwork: All you people with friends and family mocked me. On Friday when you're all dead I'll be the one laughing.

Yes, but we'll be dead together.

I'm at home coughing my guts up, my legs are so painful I can hardly walk, my chest hurts and I'm running a temperature, so I'm getting a kick....

Oh, wait. I'm not. Not sure if it's Swine Flu, but my wife is cooking bacon at the moment to cheer me up. Unfortunately the thought of eating anything is making me grooooohhhhhhhh - even lovely crunchy bacon.

Perhaps a sandwich.

Ha Ha!!! I got my shots - fark everyone else!!!

/Sorry, I had a Republican moment.

luckyeddie: I'm at home coughing my guts up, my legs are so painful I can hardly walk, my chest hurts and I'm running a temperature, so I'm getting a kick....

Oh, wait. I'm not. Not sure if it's Swine Flu, but my wife is cooking bacon at the moment to cheer me up. Unfortunately the thought of eating anything is making me grooooohhhhhhhh - even lovely crunchy bacon.

Perhaps a sandwich.

What you need are meds that end with ...codone.