This article tells me nothing about what to do for the frizzies.

What do they expect? They are not there for fancy service, they are there for plane service.

Here's what the airlines can expect from me.
Fark you, I'm not flying anymore.

Submitter: less flights

A flight is a discrete thing, at least we hope so. Flights are countable using just the set comprised of zero and the positive integers. A smaller number of them is described using "fewer."

/A partial or fractional flight is a bad thing, unless Captain Sully is at the controls, and would still be a discrete flight, just with a rather informal choice of destination.

//Of course, TFA makes the same mistake twice, but it is USA Today.

pandabear: A flight is a discrete thing, at least we hope so. Flights are countable using just the set comprised of zero and the positive integers. A smaller number of them is described using "fewer."

/A partial or fractional flight is a bad thing, unless Captain Sully is at the controls, and would still be a discrete flight, just with a rather informal choice of destination.

//Of course, TFA makes the same mistake twice, but it is USA Today.

There are really alligator pits at the airport though, right?

Now that I have my esmoke the airport is not such a pain.

They forgot about the Grues in the bathroom.

Pocket Ninja: pandabear: A flight is a discrete thing, at least we hope so. Flights are countable using just the set comprised of zero and the positive integers. A smaller number of them is described using "fewer."

/A partial or fractional flight is a bad thing, unless Captain Sully is at the controls, and would still be a discrete flight, just with a rather informal choice of destination.

//Of course, TFA makes the same mistake twice, but it is USA Today.

There are really alligator pits at the airport though, right?

The squeaking escalators will eat your crocs.

Pocket Ninja: pandabear: A flight is a discrete thing, at least we hope so. Flights are countable using just the set comprised of zero and the positive integers. A smaller number of them is described using "fewer."

/A partial or fractional flight is a bad thing, unless Captain Sully is at the controls, and would still be a discrete flight, just with a rather informal choice of destination.

//Of course, TFA makes the same mistake twice, but it is USA Today.

There are really alligator pits at the airport though, right?

No. They're actually crocodiles. You can tell by the shape of the snout.

Good one, subby. You only missed 1.5 hours of left-leaning liberal hippie screech on CNN Airport Edition.



/hot like Robin Meade

pandabear: A flight is a discrete thing, at least we hope so. Flights are countable using just the set comprised of zero and the positive integers. A smaller number of them is described using "fewer."

Came here for this smack down.

/Thanks PandaBear...

CygnusDarius: They forgot about the Grues in the bathroom.

You are likely to have your bags searched by a grue.

...rectal security searches in full public view... price gouging for 8ml of water... all passengers seated next to their own teething toddler... lost baggage... underwear from your lost baggage spotted on eBay posted by TSAmeister1103... H1N1... all benches have those little armrests welded in so you can't lie down... no cell phone signal... kick in the junk after getting off the plane, $50 kick-in-the-junk fee... story on the Fox news screen talking about how the airline industry is failing...

SteelPeart: Good one, subby. You only missed 1.5 hours of left-leaning liberal hippie screech on CNN Airport Edition.

What about the cosmic harmonic convergence of stupid? Oh, wait, you bring that with you.

FTFA: "There are also some changes to look forward to this year, such as a chance there will be fewer delays. "With less passengers in the air and less planes in the air, on-time arrivals have (improved) in the past year, as well as baggage handling," Seaney says."

Who ever Seaney is, he/she is an idiot

I'm an infrequent flier, so I'm not getting a kick...

/wish I could drive to the USVI, and avoid the cluster- of airline travel

//Delta- you suck

One thing experienced flyers can expect: Inexperienced douchebag fliers to use up all the power outlets. Not just for laptops- I have no problem with that. But I don't think your iPod or cell phone (or typically, both, 30 feet from where you're sitting) needs to be sitting on that outlet for hours waiting for a flight. Especially when your farking phone will be turned off for the whole flight.

I'm not a very frequent flyer, usually 3-5 trips/year, but it's NOT THAT HARD people...

grinderman: CygnusDarius: They forgot about the Grues in the bathroom.

You are likely to have your bags searched by a grue.

Only if there's no light available.

Pocket Ninja:
There are really alligator pits at the airport though, right?

If something is small enough to be contained in an areas the size of an average living room, Newark Airport has it.

Pocket Ninja: There are really alligator pits at the airport though, right?

I think the Florida board of tourism requires one on the approach road to every commercial airport. And Panama City (Panama, not Florida) has caymans sunning themselves on the taxiways.

Like I care. I can't afford to go anywhere.

pandabear: Submitter: less flights

A flight is a discrete thing, at least we hope so. Flights are countable using just the set comprised of zero and the positive integers. A smaller number of them is described using "fewer."


NO IRONY ZONE

Please, people. If you don't want to sound like a complete dope, make the distinction between "less" and "fewer".

/NO IRONY ZONE

Today's commercial airline industry is unsustainable.

The people who really piss me off.. are the ones who board early with a seat in the rear of the plane, but put their carry-on way up front.

I guess it's a real nicety not to carry your every so heavy bag too far on the plane, but you are truly screwing people who sit up front. Once their bins are full.. they will have to go back past their seats to stow luggage. Which means.. they are screwed when it's time to get off the plane.

I once heard a muzak version of Joy Division's Love Will Tear Us Apart while flying into Cairo. It was surreal, to say the least.

Oh and the people who won't put any bag, no matter its size, under the in front of them. I'm 6'1" and a fattie.. my laptop bag fits just fine under the seat in front.

I do not find any talk about airlines amusing after last week where I had 4 flights that all played "The Time Traveler's Wife."

Airlines suck

Airports are often crowded and unpleasant around Thanksgiving

Not to mention U.S. Senators trying to suck my dick when all I want to do is take a shiat and tap my feet to the song on my ipod.

Alligator pits are easily handled.

DarthBrooks: What to expect at the airport.

What game is that, and why haven't the PC police clamped down on it?

TsukasaK: What game is that, and why haven't the PC police clamped down on it?

I can think of 550 million reasons why not.

"If you're thinking of a vacation, one within driving distance makes sense," Brown says. "If you can eliminate airfare altogether ... that's a great option."

Huh, well I'll be darned. Who woulda thunk?

As a fairly frequent flier, I've just come to expect the craptastic delays and farknuggets that come with it. There are a lot of really annoying things people do in airports and planes, but there isn't one damn thing I can do to change it. BUT, if you are an infrequent flier and unfamilar with the security screening process, please take notice of those in front of you and how they are doing it. Here's a run down.
- have your driver's license and boarding pass at the ready
- make sure you're wearing loose fitting shoes or some kind of footware that can easily and quickly come off
- put your phone, belt, and any loose pocket stuff in your bag
- place your jacket and shoes in a tub (some airports request a seperate tub for these)
- place your electronics in another tub. If you have 2 laptops they each get their own tub
- move your carry-on and tubs forward on the screening table
- go through metal detector with your boarding pass in your hand
- get your crap and move out of the way; don't stand at the conveyer trying to put your shoes and belt on. You're gonna get mowed down.

DO NOT be offended if someone jumps you in line. They're probably regular travelers and most of us have the security thing down to an art.

I have to fly on business next week. I'm not looking forward to dealing with a bunch of people who never fly, trying to cram their full sized bags into the overhead. I'm expecting at least a 20 minute delay for each flight because of this. That's in addition to the idiot delays at security.

Wheee! Fark me.

I wish airport security had an express line for people with government security clearances. The feds have already combed my past for every little detail, and decided I'm trustworthy enough to have access to classified information. Yet when I fly alone, 99% of the time I will get picked out for a random inspection. In just one trip, I was pulled aside 3 seperate times before getting through security.

Not that I've been mistreated, it just seems ridiculous. I know better than to provoke the TSA people.

pandabear: //Of course, TFA makes the same mistake twice, but it is USA Today.

The USAToday is like the Scholastic™ WeeklyReader, but for grown-ups.

uprislng: In just one trip, I was pulled aside 3 seperate times before getting through security.

Not that I've been mistreated, it just seems ridiculous. I know better than to provoke the TSA people.

You probably shouldn't travel with the alarm clock and highway flares wrapped in wire in your carry-on.

DarthBrooks: TsukasaK: What game is that, and why haven't the PC police clamped down on it?

I can think of 550 million reasons why not.

Suddenly, I want to play MW2.

/Who hasn't had a fantasy about shooting up a...
//Nevermind

TSA = UFIA

The Angry Hand of God: I do not find any talk about airlines amusing after last week where I had 4 flights that all played "The Time Traveler's Wife."

Pfft, I've had worse. I once had 4 flights that played "50 First Dates."

Rapmaster2000: Pfft, I've had worse. I once had 4 flights that played "50 First Dates."

Got it beat - two transcons with "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" - -and then they REPEATED IT. In both directions. Kill me.

uprislng: I wish airport security had an express line for people with government security clearances. The feds have already combed my past for every little detail, and decided I'm trustworthy enough to have access to classified information. Yet when I fly alone, 99% of the time I will get picked out for a random inspection. In just one trip, I was pulled aside 3 seperate times before getting through security.

Not that I've been mistreated, it just seems ridiculous. I know better than to provoke the TSA people.

I know the feeling. I have a TS and a plane to catch. Maybe if we could have our VAR sent to the TSA people a day before we travel it could work. Then again 90% of the people departing from our airport are gov't, so an express line probably wouldn't speed things up much. But it would be awesome to have on the days the Space Camp 'tards are going home.

DarthBrooks: uprislng: In just one trip, I was pulled aside 3 seperate times before getting through security.

Not that I've been mistreated, it just seems ridiculous. I know better than to provoke the TSA people.

You probably shouldn't travel with the alarm clock and highway flares wrapped in wire in your carry-on.

Well, it is an easy mistake to make. How else should i wrap my road flares? And my acme alarm clock seems to fit perfectly above them in my carry on.

DarthBrooks: Rapmaster2000: Pfft, I've had worse. I once had 4 flights that played "50 First Dates."

Got it beat - two transcons with "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" - -and then they REPEATED IT. In both directions. Kill me.

jeez people, it's called a book. look into it.

fizzix_is_fun: DarthBrooks: Rapmaster2000: Pfft, I've had worse. I once had 4 flights that played "50 First Dates."

Got it beat - two transcons with "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" - -and then they REPEATED IT. In both directions. Kill me.

jeez people, it's called a book. look into it.

Read on a plane? Yuck.

Sleep aids. That's the future of flying.

/Just ask the pilots.

DarthBrooks: Rapmaster2000: Pfft, I've had worse. I once had 4 flights that played "50 First Dates."

Got it beat - two transcons with "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" - -and then they REPEATED IT. In both directions. Kill me.

Simple solution:
Bose (or any other noise reduction) headphones
Loaded iPod with vast array of music on shuffle
1 Klonipin
Several adult beverages
Sleeping mask

TA - DAAAAA! Worked beautifully on the last trip back from Alaska.

fizzix_is_fun: DarthBrooks: Rapmaster2000: Pfft, I've had worse. I once had 4 flights that played "50 First Dates."

Got it beat - two transcons with "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" - -and then they REPEATED IT. In both directions. Kill me.

jeez people, it's called a book. look into it.

Durr reading what's that. I'm a stereotype of the people you hate that you imagine only watch TV cuz they're stupi.d

Jesus, dude. I'm aware when the plane is playing a bad movie. That doesn't mean I watch it.