That cat could have come down any time he wanted to. Lazy bastards.

Squirrels, having trouble climbing down trees, evolved were given more flexible ankles by God. Cats, having trouble climbing down trees, evolved were given humans with pulleys by God

Don't say the "E" word. You'll anger Kirk Cameron.

using a chainsaw would have been more fun

GreenAdder: Don't say the "E" word. You'll anger Kirk Cameron.

He'll sik crocoduck on yo' ass.

You have to be impressed with an animal whose very shiat contains germs that will infect you and make you more well-disposed towards it.

How can you say they're evolved? Have you found any intermediate pulley forms?

/It's going to be a long Caturday

There are, to my knowledge, no known discoveries of cat skeletons in trees.

And speaking as former firefighter who got called out on a few of these idiot calls, let me say that firehoses get 'em down faster than pulleys.

And now that stupid cat will live to propagate it's pussy genes.

Stormneedle: How can you say they're evolved? Have you found any intermediate pulley forms?

/It's going to be a long Caturday

Sure is if we're starting it on Friday morning...

FTFA "The cat came right to him," said Vogel, 40, of Dedham. "AJ put it in a cat carrier, brought it back down, and the owner was perfectly happy."

Most riveting article I've read all day.

CaptSacto: There are, to my knowledge, no known discoveries of cat skeletons in trees.

And speaking as former firefighter who got called out on a few of these idiot calls, let me say that firehoses get 'em down faster than pulleys.

Hilarious.



Putting a can of tuna at the bottom works too.


/I like the firehose idea better though

Sounds like a catastrophic catastrophy.

No one says "squirrel ankles" anymore. The modern term is "squankles."

I'd post a really short & vulgar comment about this kitty and the wooden tree, but I'm afraid Kurt Greenbaum is the guest moderator tonight.

Mentat: That cat could have come down any time he wanted to. Lazy bastards.

This. My bengal cat's an 18-pounder and climbs down trees head-first. They come down if or when they feel like it.

CaptSacto: There are, to my knowledge, no known discoveries of cat skeletons in trees.

And speaking as former firefighter who got called out on a few of these idiot calls, let me say that firehoses get 'em down faster than pulleys.

Funny visual. Bullshiat, but still funny.

Cagey B: You have to be impressed with an animal whose very shiat contains germs that will infect you and make you more well-disposed towards it.

It would be interesting and insightful...if your wikipedia link and it's reference didn't require a registration with royalsocietypublishing.org to view their data.

/didn't register

The cat is not in the tree because it is afraid to come down, its there because it does not want to come down. The loud noise a proclamation;

ON TOP OF THE WORLD MA!

Tackleberry would've been glad to help.

And yet people still think cats are somehow intelligent.

"Hmmm, perhaps I should not have climbed so high. Nah, i'll go higher."

Should have got the A Team to shoot it down with their guns, frickin awesome

That Guy...From That Show!: Cagey B: You have to be impressed with an animal whose very shiat contains germs that will infect you and make you more well-disposed towards it.

It would be interesting and insightful...if your wikipedia link and it's reference didn't require a registration with royalsocietypublishing.org to view their data.

/didn't register

Assuming he's referring to toxoplasmosis, which a great number of cats are infected with.

It causes brain damage in mice that make it so the mice are no longer afraid of cats. The cats catch them faster, become infected. Humans catch it by breathing in shiat dust if they let the cat shiat indoors, and it causes brain damage that is still being investigated, but is correlated with an increased risk of traffic accidents, subtle change in personality, possibly even schizophrenia. A decade ago, it was thought that it was only a danger to pregnant women. Now we know it causes damage in adults as well, just less obvious damage.

Cagey B: You have to be impressed with an animal whose very shiat contains germs that will infect you and make you more well-disposed towards it.

Sooo... What you are saying is, the whole "Crazy-Cat Lady" thing could be caused by this parasitic germ? Also, that the germ causes said ladies to be more promiscuous? This is a troubling paradox for many farkers, to be sure. Oh wait! We have Caturdays! OK, this is the perfect farker parasite.

Reverend Otis: And yet people still think cats are somehow intelligent.

"Hmmm, perhaps I should not have climbed so high. Nah, i'll go higher."

Almost like the amateur hikers that decide to go climb that rockface right over there and have to get their asses rescued (if they don't fall first).
It's a lot easier on the way up.

Cagey B: You have to be impressed with an animal whose very shiat contains germs that will infect you and make you more well-disposed towards it.

Damn. Evolutionary symbiosis at work.

Cats are EVIL!

/adorable little devils!

FerroMancer: SQUIRREL!

Grrr. 3 minutes too late...

skinink: I'd post a really short & vulgar comment about this kitty and the wooden tree, but I'm afraid Kurt Greenbaum is the guest moderator tonight.

*snerk*

//vodka hurts when it comes out of your nose.
///TMYK

Troggie42: Cagey B: You have to be impressed with an animal whose very shiat contains germs that will infect you and make you more well-disposed towards it.

Sooo... What you are saying is, the whole "Crazy-Cat Lady" thing could be caused by this parasitic germ? Also, that the germ causes said ladies to be more promiscuous? This is a troubling paradox for many farkers, to be sure. Oh wait! We have Caturdays! OK, this is the perfect farker parasite.

My cat is telling me this is all nonsense made up by the lizard people along with the reverse vampires, I think I'll trust my cat.

Quiet, a whale is in trouble. I have to go.

GardenWeasel: FerroMancer: SQUIRREL!

Grrr. 3 minutes too late...

Damn, how'd i miss that. Nicely done :)

/Pussy

Stretch Armstrong also has flexible ankles.

I often wonder if my neighbor is trying to kill her cat, and her kids for that matter. She refuses to clean the litter box, just dumps more over the top. The house smells like urea and she and her two children exist in it. She also rarely if ever feeds the cat.

So if I feed the cat, am I trying to harm my neighbor by allowing it to go home and poison their atmosphere just a little more?

mephisto6: GardenWeasel: FerroMancer: SQUIRREL!

Grrr. 3 minutes too late...

Damn, how'd i miss that. Nicely done :)

/Pussy

well... swap out GardenWeasel's quote with Llois' post and that mighta' made sense.
/I clicked in the general vicinity!

Huskadoodle: So if I feed the cat, am I trying to harm my neighbor by allowing it to go home and poison their atmosphere just a little more?

Yes. The problem is, you probably don't want to harm her kids though.

Pre caturday cool story, bro:

When I was a little kid my dad did some electrical work for a local riding academy in exchange for my sister and my equestrian lessons, (oh, stop laughing) and I usually went with him as a general step-and-fetch helper.

Every proper barn needs to have a barn cat, and this particular barn cat had a bonus, a big litter of kittens. So of course, during the times when I wasn't carrying stuff I played with the kittens under mama kit's watchful eye.

At the end of the day we packed up and drove home, stopping at a gas station along the way. We pulled up to the house and as I was helping unload the truck, we heard: "mew!"

A teeny-tiny calico kitten hopped down out of the wheel well of the truck, took one look at us, and ZOOM! ran right up a poplar tree and started crying about being stuck.

Being young and limber, I was elected to go up and get her. So here I was, 30 feet up, the whole tree swaying, trying to catch a kitten single-handed while she hissed and spat at me.

Well, many scratches later I did manage to get her down, and we took her inside. Despite our putting down bowls of both kibble and milk, she was still looking at us like we were going to rip her open and feast on her liver at any moment, (those big eyes) and of course as soon as someone was fool enough to open the door...

ZOOM! Out the door and back up the same tree.

On my second trip down with said kitten in hand I figured out her name.

We named her "Nuisance." She ended up being my little brother's best friend.

Huskadoodle: I often wonder if my neighbor is trying to kill her cat, and her kids for that matter. She refuses to clean the litter box, just dumps more over the top. The house smells like urea and she and her two children exist in it. She also rarely if ever feeds the cat.

So if I feed the cat, am I trying to harm my neighbor by allowing it to go home and poison their atmosphere just a little more?

I guess some people block it out, somehow. I helped my gf move her buddy's TV a couple weeks ago. The house was imaculate, but smelled like pure cat piss. So bad it almost knocked me over.
I was like, "Are you kidding me?" and she was all, "Shhh!"
Place smelled like someone squeezed piss outta that cat all over the place, but that lady could not smell it.

Megain: using a chainsaw would have been more fun

True, cool story, bro: Years ago, my cat, Samantha, was "stuck" in a tree for 3 days. 3 days and nights of mournful, Siamese cries. Finally, unable to take it anymore, my father put a ladder against the tree, climbed at least a dozen branches, and chainsawed the limb the cat was sitting on. At least a 30' drop.

Both limb & cat came crashing down. Onto our roof. $1,800 for a new roof, but the stupid cat was safe inside.

/Moral: If they're stuck in a tree, leave 'em. It's not like you see many cat skeletons in trees.

tbyte: you probably don't want to harm her kids though.

Well, have you met these kids? No, I do not want to harm the kids, but are you insinuating that by feeding the cat I'm harming the kids? They are the ones who .....hell, they don't even clean their own litter box. It's something you just have to see/smell/experience.

The longer they stay in a tree the less impact mass they will have.

mephisto6: Huskadoodle: I often wonder if my neighbor is trying to kill her cat, and her kids for that matter. She refuses to clean the litter box, just dumps more over the top. The house smells like urea and she and her two children exist in it. She also rarely if ever feeds the cat.

So if I feed the cat, am I trying to harm my neighbor by allowing it to go home and poison their atmosphere just a little more?

I guess some people block it out, somehow. I helped my gf move her buddy's TV a couple weeks ago. The house was imaculate, but smelled like pure cat piss. So bad it almost knocked me over.
I was like, "Are you kidding me?" and she was all, "Shhh!"
Place smelled like someone squeezed piss outta that cat all over the place, but that lady could not smell it.

Most cat owners with indoor litter boxes will say "I keep it clean and change it twice a day so it doesn't smell", when in fact it always smells, they just get used to it and refuse to believe otherwise. Now before someone quotes me and says "But I do keep it clean, for real!", think about it; If you let a random bum stop by and take a shiat on your floor, and you left it there even an hour, would it smell?

mephisto6: This. My bengal cat's an 18-pounder and climbs down trees head-first. They come down if or when they feel like it.

Hell THIS.

Although when I was growing up we did have a cat "stuck" who tried to come down a tree, got a rear knee lodged in a nook, broke his left rear leg, and then dangled for all of the 90 seconds it took us to chase the sound.

He was 2 feet off the ground. However, he was in such pain we had to use a blanket to wrap him before we could lift him up. Vet reset and cast his leg as best she could, but he walked awful the rest of his life.

tbyte: mephisto6: Huskadoodle: I often wonder if my neighbor is trying to kill her cat, and her kids for that matter. She refuses to clean the litter box, just dumps more over the top. The house smells like urea and she and her two children exist in it. She also rarely if ever feeds the cat.

So if I feed the cat, am I trying to harm my neighbor by allowing it to go home and poison their atmosphere just a little more?

I guess some people block it out, somehow. I helped my gf move her buddy's TV a couple weeks ago. The house was imaculate, but smelled like pure cat piss. So bad it almost knocked me over.
I was like, "Are you kidding me?" and she was all, "Shhh!"
Place smelled like someone squeezed piss outta that cat all over the place, but that lady could not smell it.

Most cat owners with indoor litter boxes will say "I keep it clean and change it twice a day so it doesn't smell", when in fact it always smells, they just get used to it and refuse to believe otherwise. Now before someone quotes me and says "But I do keep it clean, for real!", think about it; If you let a random bum stop by and take a shiat on your floor, and you left it there even an hour, would it smell?

Look its the same thing with smokers. I finally quit and I can smell a cigarette half a block away before I quite I could smoke a cartoon in a closet and not smell it. Although I like kitty mind control better ;)

tinfoil-hat maggie: Troggie42: Cagey B: You have to be impressed with an animal whose very shiat contains germs that will infect you and make you more well-disposed towards it.

Sooo... What you are saying is, the whole "Crazy-Cat Lady" thing could be caused by this parasitic germ? Also, that the germ causes said ladies to be more promiscuous? This is a troubling paradox for many farkers, to be sure. Oh wait! We have Caturdays! OK, this is the perfect farker parasite.

My cat is telling me this is all nonsense made up by the lizard people along with the reverse vampires, I think I'll trust my cat.

My eels are filled with hovercrafts.

I dont know why all the fuss. Cats do come down. Ever see a Cat skeleton in a tree?
//Had to call the FD to get my Cat out of a high tree once he would not shut the fark up. Thought he was hurt. Was fine. Most embarrassing day of my life.

tinfoil-hat maggie: Look its the same thing with smokers. I finally quit and I can smell a cigarette half a block away before I quite I could smoke a cartoon in a closet and not smell it. Although I like kitty mind control better ;)

Which cartoon?

/I'm sure Daffy loved you in that closet.

Gyrfalcon Now I can't stop laughing, thank you

tinfoil-hat maggie: Look its the same thing with smokers. I finally quit and I can smell a cigarette half a block away before I quite I could smoke a cartoon in a closet and not smell it. Although I like kitty mind control better ;)

I'm not sure what you're saying with the smokers and the cartoons and the kitty mind control, but it made me smile :)

mgshamster: tinfoil-hat maggie: Look its the same thing with smokers. I finally quit and I can smell a cigarette half a block away before I quite I could smoke a cartoon in a closet and not smell it. Although I like kitty mind control better ;)

Which cartoon?

/I'm sure Daffy loved you in that closet.

lol, yes it's a said story really it started with one I tell ya, and then well before I knew it... I was trying all the cartoon's I couldn't get enough, Bugs Daffy,Micky, oh god even the super-friends...
/wow all that for a typo, oh well:p