I'm willing to bet $5 million dollars he's not really hurting for money either.

A spokesperson for the event - which featured performances from Beyonce Knowles, Aerosmith and Timbaland, and raised money for clean water charity Fresh2o - admitted Brad had been expected to attend.

Why does Brad Pitt want poor children to die from drinking unclean water?

Having the "moral integrity" to turn down $5 million to spend time with your kids is quite a bit easier when you're a multimillionaire already.

Elvis_Bogart: Why does Brad Pitt want poor children to die from drinking unclean water?

Or maybe he thought that the $5 million would be better spent on, say, making clean water?

Bullshiat. He should have taken the job. Just think how much 'time with your kids' you could arrange with $5 million!

The money from that one gig would pay for all the education the kids would ever need, plus all the travel you could wish for.

he could have done the gig...and given the money to charity.

kids are tough...they can take it.

boo farking hoo for brad pitts kids.

-this is why we all can't have nice things.

as a "nation"...we're farking stupid.

fark this 'celebrity' culture.

brad pitt is a punk...and i would say it to his face, given the chance.

they're all punks.

after you've made your "first" 5 million, basically play acting...i don't want to hear from you, other than the news that you are 'giving back' to the masses who made you.

god must love trainwrecks.

Bauer: he could have done the gig...and given the money to charity.

kids are tough...they can take it.

boo farking hoo for brad pitts kids.

-this is why we all can't have nice things.

as a "nation"...we're farking stupid.

fark this 'celebrity' culture.

brad pitt is a punk...and i would say it to his face, given the chance.

they're all punks.

after you've made your "first" 5 million, basically play acting...i don't want to hear from you, other than the news that you are 'giving back' to the masses who made you.

god must love trainwrecks.

Now that's funny.

ne2d: Bauer: he could have done the gig...and given the money to charity.

kids are tough...they can take it.

boo farking hoo for brad pitts kids.

-this is why we all can't have nice things.

as a "nation"...we're farking stupid.

fark this 'celebrity' culture.

brad pitt is a punk...and i would say it to his face, given the chance.

they're all punks.

after you've made your "first" 5 million, basically play acting...i don't want to hear from you, other than the news that you are 'giving back' to the masses who made you.

god must love trainwrecks.

Now that's funny.

just pullin' a palin...and "telling it how it is".

she has no clue what she's in for.

-i hope to personally make her cry.

you know...i have nothing against brad...but this shiat is out of farking hand.

i speak for the guy who goes to work, everyday, and gets the goat-farking, everyday.

that may or may not be through my own actions...it is my life to choose to do the things that better my situation, however...

brad pitts kids...are "brad pitts" kids.

they will suffer for nothing in life.

unless mommy and daddy fark their lives up for them.

-he wants to take his ball and go home...with his fame and money intact.

fine.

just stay home and shut the fark up already.

it was his choice not to attend this event.
he was supposed to be there.

he chose to "play daddy" for trick or treat time.

what about the times your "kids" need you to help with everyday struggles, brad?

will you be there then?

-or will you be "working" on yet another piece of fluff for millions?

real people have real problems and have no money.

there are far too many americans getting the shaft to be "picking and choosing" when or where your celebrity ass will show up to help "the little people".

we own you, brad.

-you owe us.

Yeah Brad. You owe us. My portion comes to $17.39.

I will be sending you an invoice, with terms 30 days. A 1 1/2 percent (per month) service charge will be assessed on any late balances.

Bauer: he could have done the gig...and given the money to charity.

kids are tough...they can take it.

boo farking hoo for brad pitts kids.

-this is why we all can't have nice things.

as a "nation"...we're farking stupid.

fark this 'celebrity' culture.

brad pitt is a punk...and i would say it to his face, given the chance.

they're all punks.

after you've made your "first" 5 million, basically play acting...i don't want to hear from you, other than the news that you are 'giving back' to the masses who made you.

god must love trainwrecks.

you're a weird guy, man. and clearly not aware of the immense charity work this guy does.

this is why i loves me some wil wheaton.

-he keeps it real.

farker.

"explorer".

dad.

-then a celebrity.

wil could be a douche...but i don't believe he has it in him.

pitt, on the other hand, is a mega-star, who should feel the weight of his deeds.

if you are going to put yourself 'on the stage'...you'd better expect some blowback when you prove to be a selfish douche.

those kids would've understood...and they would've probably been proud of him, one day.

now...all they will have are jaded memories of him, playing daddy, when he could have been out there, making a huge difference.

he is not an ordinary man.
the kids will learn that eventually.

and he wants to be "political" brad pitt?

i cannot wait for that.

Bauer: i cannot wait for that.

Who pissed in your cereal this morning?

you know, my dad used to take me on work trips with him sometimes. they were fun bonding experiences, and i really didn't mind hanging out in the hotel room and watching a movie while he attended to his business. i guarantee none of those trips resulted in a $5 million payment to my dad.

Bauer: this is why i loves me some wil wheaton.

-he keeps it real.

farker.

"explorer".

dad.

-then a celebrity.

wil could be a douche...but i don't believe he has it in him.

pitt, on the other hand, is a mega-star, who should feel the weight of his deeds.

if you are going to put yourself 'on the stage'...you'd better expect some blowback when you prove to be a selfish douche.

those kids would've understood...and they would've probably been proud of him, one day.

now...all they will have are jaded memories of him, playing daddy, when he could have been out there, making a huge difference.

he is not an ordinary man.
the kids will learn that eventually.

and he wants to be "political" brad pitt?

i cannot wait for that.


Shouldn't you be crying about Star Trek?

WaltzingMathilda: Bauer: he could have done the gig...and given the money to charity.

kids are tough...they can take it.

boo farking hoo for brad pitts kids.

-this is why we all can't have nice things.

as a "nation"...we're farking stupid.

fark this 'celebrity' culture.

brad pitt is a punk...and i would say it to his face, given the chance.

they're all punks.

after you've made your "first" 5 million, basically play acting...i don't want to hear from you, other than the news that you are 'giving back' to the masses who made you.

god must love trainwrecks.

you're a weird guy, man. and clearly not aware of the immense charity work this guy does.

it goes with the territory.

there are people here on fark that "worship" this man.

they would eat razor blades if he told them to.

-when you have that kind of power...and let's not quibble...it is POWER we're talking about here...people need to be held accountable.

this is a different age than the "golden age of entertainment".

hollywood has FAILED to gloss over the age old lie.

the world is a cold, hard, mean, unfair place to most of its inhabitants.

-that is reality.

ironic that pitt played a roll that portrayed a man bent on bringing the system down, for the good of the people.

the same system that affords his very lifestyle today.

this was his chance.


-what would tyler durden do?


we will never know-

and before anyone else gets all bent out of shape...

we are talking about 5 MILLION dollars here.

Does it seem weird in here to anyone else?

Maybe I should just put on a sweater.

Calmamity: Does it seem weird in here to anyone else?

Maybe I should just put on a sweater.

maybe you should.

it may get chilly in here.

Bauer: and before anyone else gets all bent out of shape...

we are talking about 5 MILLION dollars here.

i don't get it man. he didn't show up to one event that would have been filled with rich people, which probably didn't really need him from the looks of the lineup, and he saved the charity $5M which could go to good work instead. he usually does a bunch of hands on charity work, working directly with the people who need the help. what good would it have done for him to show up to a star studded event again?

WaltzingMathilda: Bauer: and before anyone else gets all bent out of shape...

we are talking about 5 MILLION dollars here.

i don't get it man. he didn't show up to one event that would have been filled with rich people, which probably didn't really need him from the looks of the lineup, and he saved the charity $5M which could go to good work instead. he usually does a bunch of hands on charity work, working directly with the people who need the help. what good would it have done for him to show up to a star studded event again?

i don't think you get it. he played a popular movie character that blew up buildings to bring down the system. as an actor, it's his duty to uphold the worldview of his famous parts and go to charity events in order to bring down the system. but he blew it. he blew it for all of us. what would rusty ryan do, indeed.

WaltzingMathilda: Bauer: and before anyone else gets all bent out of shape...

we are talking about 5 MILLION dollars here.

i don't get it man. he didn't show up to one event that would have been filled with rich people, which probably didn't really need him from the looks of the lineup, and he saved the charity $5M which could go to good work instead. he usually does a bunch of hands on charity work, working directly with the people who need the help. what good would it have done for him to show up to a star studded event again?

i'll give you five million reasons.

everyday "joe" can hit a nail with a hammer.

he's "brad pitt".

the list was lame, compared to his drawing power.

he could have given the money, he apparently doesn't need...to habitat for humanity...or some other group.

we are talking about five million dollars here.

-in this economy.

in this year, 2009.

i'm a nobody...and i get involved.

too much for my own good, somewhat.

it's how i live with myself.

five million dollars just to "show up"?

-please.

ok...ask yourself the douche question.

"would i do it?"

would you go to the "grand prix" ball...probably all expenses 'paid'...and recieve five million dollars to boot.

-that you could do with, as you will.

if your answer is "no"...then you are a douche.

see how easy that was.

Bauer: see how easy that was.

Meth is a helluva drug.

Can I have the $5 mil?

Bauer: ok...ask yourself the douche question.

"would i do it?"

would you go to the "grand prix" ball...probably all expenses 'paid'...and recieve five million dollars to boot.

-that you could do with, as you will.

if your answer is "no"...then you are a douche.

see how easy that was.

OK you can stop now.

That was stupid.

In before the cynical anti-Brangelina bullsh--wow, way too late.

Mugato: In before the cynical anti-Brangelina bullsh--wow, way too late.

Not even cynical really - more of an incoherent Mountain Dew overdose.

Event organizers were even more confused when Edward Norton showed up, expecting a large personal appearance fee.

If you read Bauer's posts in your head with a Stephen Hawking voice (complete with the pauses between each sentence) it sounds really neat.

Oh, good. I've found the daily "bauer goes on a weird and incoherent rant" thread. My morning is complete.

$5 million? Okay, seriously, this is what the friggin' is for. Good for him!

Bauer: WaltzingMathilda: Bauer: and before anyone else gets all bent out of shape...

we are talking about 5 MILLION dollars here.

i don't get it man. he didn't show up to one event that would have been filled with rich people, which probably didn't really need him from the looks of the lineup, and he saved the charity $5M which could go to good work instead. he usually does a bunch of hands on charity work, working directly with the people who need the help. what good would it have done for him to show up to a star studded event again?

i'll give you five million reasons.

everyday "joe" can hit a nail with a hammer.

he's "brad pitt".

the list was lame, compared to his drawing power.

he could have given the money, he apparently doesn't need...to habitat for humanity...or some other group.

we are talking about five million dollars here.

-in this economy.

in this year, 2009.

i'm a nobody...and i get involved.

too much for my own good, somewhat.

it's how i live with myself.

five million dollars just to "show up"?

-please.

Wow, congrats on being bittern and uninformed about Brad Pitt and the huge amount of time/money he's put into rebuilding New Orleans. I know that's not all he's done, but it's definitely something close to my heart; being pretty much the only megastar to put any sort of time and effort into rebuilding my home.

He is "giving it back", jackass. What? You're pissed because in real life, he isn't really Tyler Durden? That he was just PLAYING a ROLE for a MOVIE based on a BOOK? Dude, I love the book and the movie, but I can assure you I'm no nihilistic Neo-Luddite anarchist, either. The book interests me, as I'm sure it interested Pitt.

Sorry your period started this morning, kid.

Bauer: this is why i loves me some wil wheaton.

-he keeps it real.

farker.

"explorer".

dad.

-then a celebrity.



The order you mentioned is dictated, because nobody gives a shiat about him.

"Lemme get this straight, Daddy... you could take us to Chuck E. Cheese's today, or we could do that tomorrow and then we could each buy a yacht?"

Celebrities don't have feelings or rights!

DoughyGuy: If you read Bauer's posts in your head with a Stephen Hawking voice (complete with the pauses between each sentence) it sounds really neat.

THERE'S NO TIME TO FORM PARAGRAPHS!

Does he realize how many children he could've bought with that kind of money?!

For every $5 million dollar public appearance Brad Pitt turns down, I shall accept three $5 million dollar public appearances.

That'll teach his smug ass a lesson.

WaltzingMathilda: Bauer: he could have done the gig...and given the money to charity.

kids are tough...they can take it.

boo farking hoo for brad pitts kids.

-this is why we all can't have nice things.

as a "nation"...we're farking stupid.

fark this 'celebrity' culture.

brad pitt is a punk...and i would say it to his face, given the chance.

they're all punks.

after you've made your "first" 5 million, basically play acting...i don't want to hear from you, other than the news that you are 'giving back' to the masses who made you.

god must love trainwrecks.

you're a weird guy, man. and clearly not aware of the immense charity work this guy does.

You mean how he convinces other people to spend their money for causes? Even the robber barons couldn't sleep at night with such a bunco scheme. They spent their own dirty simoleons.

I have no problem with Brad Pitt, but this would be like me turning down 100 bucks in order to hang out with my kids.

To the avg person, 5 Mill is a lifetime plus of money. To Brad, it is about 15 minutes of screen time.

Yeah, but do you know how much tax you have to pay on $5 million?

Plus you have to deal with TSA, and get a work Visa, and deal with Customs to declare the gifts you buy for the family when you come back.

And the flight over there is really long, so that's a pain in the ass, and yeah UAE has the world's only 7-star hotel, but seriously, how many times can you eat Beluga caviar omeletes for breakfast?

And it's really hot there, too, so you have to take that into account.

I'd have skipped it too.

Blah!
1. He isnt even hot anymore. Have you seen that nasty beard?
2. Celebrities turn down events like this all the time. Only the Celebrities who have two tell all books written about them and coming out in a few weeks put a story like that into the press.
3. I have yet to see in all my many trips to New orleans how is organization is helping rebuild anything. A few ugly houses does not make a city rebuilt. When they needed simple TRASH COLLECTION this tard had his architect buddies drawing green house. Yay thanks beyatch!
4. Four is my favorite number so I just wanted to slap it on the behind of this list like I was brad pitt slapping James Haven away from my baby momma's fish lips on Oscar night.

moonage daydream: Bauer: WaltzingMathilda: Bauer: and before anyone else gets all bent out of shape...

we are talking about 5 MILLION dollars here.

i don't get it man. he didn't show up to one event that would have been filled with rich people, which probably didn't really need him from the looks of the lineup, and he saved the charity $5M which could go to good work instead. he usually does a bunch of hands on charity work, working directly with the people who need the help. what good would it have done for him to show up to a star studded event again?

i'll give you five million reasons.

everyday "joe" can hit a nail with a hammer.

he's "brad pitt".

the list was lame, compared to his drawing power.

he could have given the money, he apparently doesn't need...to habitat for humanity...or some other group.

we are talking about five million dollars here.

-in this economy.

in this year, 2009.

i'm a nobody...and i get involved.

too much for my own good, somewhat.

it's how i live with myself.

five million dollars just to "show up"?

-please.

Wow, congrats on being bittern and uninformed about Brad Pitt and the huge amount of time/money he's put into rebuilding New Orleans. I know that's not all he's done, but it's definitely something close to my heart; being pretty much the only megastar to put any sort of time and effort into rebuilding my home.

He is "giving it back", jackass. What? You're pissed because in real life, he isn't really Tyler Durden? That he was just PLAYING a ROLE for a MOVIE based on a BOOK? Dude, I love the book and the movie, but I can assure you I'm no nihilistic Neo-Luddite anarchist, either. The book interests me, as I'm sure it interested Pitt.

Sorry your period started this morning, kid.

he has a future political agenda there.

i don't buy it.
-and you don't get it.

"being pretty much the only megastar to put any sort of time and effort into rebuilding my home."

that's because most of them could give a flying fark about you.
you live in a flood plain...as far as the wealthy are concerned.

if you're buying what he's selling...then have at it.

there is a reason people choose to live in flat, safe, states... way to the north of you.

given common knowledge...if you choose to live in an area that is prone to natural disasters...you are taking your chances.

-that is all.

what are you going to do when the next big hurricane pounds your ass...and at the same time, brad pitts home in los angeles is "in danger" from a wildfire?

-or an earthquake?

how many disasters do you think this nation can pay for?
at once?

getting back to the "grand prix ball"...
he could have taken his whole family with him, you know.

the problem is...he thinks he's tyler durden, achilles, "joe blow the vampire" and is conflicted with his own plastic-face mentality.

he's got your number...and support, evidently.

rmz: Bauer:

why do you think i'm trolling?

-why...he could have given that money to the new orleans habitat for humanity.

yeah...that's what johnny would do.

have a stick of gum.

I would show up at the Source awards wearing blackface for 5 million.

Is anyone else surprised Bauer didn't use the caps lock for his posts?

tweekster: Is anyone else surprised Bauer didn't use the caps lock for his posts?

maybe thats just like, his opinion maaaan.

srhp29: I have no problem with Brad Pitt, but this would be like me turning down 100 bucks in order to hang out with my kids.

To the avg person, 5 Mill is a lifetime plus of money. To Brad, it is about 15 minutes of screen time.

No kid is worth 100 dollars

1. they're just going to offer him more next time
2. $5M to brad pitt is like $8.23 to the average american