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(UPI) Dumbass
Editor: I have always disliked that particular mug shot of mine taken at police headquarters. Please find enclosed a recent photo to use as a replacement. Sincerely, Dumbass



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gobbles71
2009-11-07 01:41:53 AM


Haha those cheeky welsh ... almost as bad as the irish ... almost

 
Meatzilla
2009-11-07 02:56:47 AM


Photos are currently unavailable for this story img1.fark.net

 
KittySoft
2009-11-07 06:30:17 AM


i.dailymail.co.uk

/Hot

 
FoxEnigma
2009-11-07 06:30:34 AM


Story is worthless without pics. Thread fails without a story. Film at 11.

 
xLizzieBordenx
2009-11-07 06:36:52 AM


Uh...what's a berk?

 
HammerHeadSnark
2009-11-07 06:45:02 AM


Berk:

Etymology

The usage is dated to the 1930s. A shortened version of Berkeley Hunt, the hunt based at Berkeley Castle in Gloucestershire. In the Cockney rhyming slang, hunt is made to rhyme with c*nt giving the word berk its original slang meaning.

from Wiktionary

 
Ding Dong Seven
2009-11-07 06:45:20 AM


xLizzieBordenx: Uh...what's a berk?

An idiot, a dolt, a tool. It's a British phrase, I think.

 
bonzeemer
2009-11-07 06:55:22 AM


This is a "berk" NSFW (new window)

 
spill_thrill
2009-11-07 07:12:14 AM


Why shouldn't they want a more recent pic?

 
frizzantik
2009-11-07 07:25:06 AM


HammerHeadSnark: Berk:

Etymology

The usage is dated to the 1930s. A shortened version of Berkeley Hunt, the hunt based at Berkeley Castle in Gloucestershire. In the Cockney rhyming slang, hunt is made to rhyme with c*nt giving the word berk its original slang meaning.

from Wiktionary


that shiat is so random

 
Crid
2009-11-07 07:46:50 AM


frizzantik: that shiat is so random

And the rest of the English language isn't?

 
Harry Freakstorm
2009-11-07 07:52:00 AM


Every time they run my profile on America's Most Wanted I cringe. First, the actor they got to portray me has obviously never slapped a nun in his life. You can't just hit a penguin across the jaw. They just laugh it off. It's something they learn in the convent I guess. You got to put your knuckle right in to the temple. It scrambles their eyesight. Sometimes they think they're seeing Jebus and it scares the crap out of them.

Second, I had a mullet for maybe three of those ten assaults. It was a phase. I grew out of it. Just like when I stopped using yellow nylon cord to bind their arms. Now it's Duct tape. It's quick and it sticks.

Third and lastly, they always end the piece with the Hoffman murder. I never touched housewives with kids. It's not in my MO. Besides, I was up in Ogdenville torturing Sister Mary Ellen. I could get back down there with in that time frame to rape and kill that housewife. Maybe dad could but I like to be methodical. Maybe that's why one of us is waiting for the needle in Joliet and the other is sizing up his next victim over at St. Mary's Academy for the Deaf. Oops.

 
colatf
2009-11-07 08:08:35 AM


Any Australians remember the Postcard Bandit from a few years back? That man had some cajones. I had a sort of grudging respect for him.

 
Unright
2009-11-07 08:46:49 AM


What's up with UPI? Their sidebar reads like it's tailored for the denizens of Idiocracy.

Odd News Photos
John Glenn Gets Punched in the Face
Taking One for the Team: a Collection
The Lingerie Football League
Video: World Body Painting Festival

 
haemaker
2009-11-07 09:22:23 AM


Oi, the yob berk is going to be in Barney.

/Barney.... Barney Rubble.... TROUBLE!

 
olddeegee
2009-11-07 09:31:14 AM


Harry Freakstorm: Every time they run my profile on America's Most Wanted I cringe. First, the actor they got to portray me has obviously never slapped a nun in his life. You can't just hit a penguin across the jaw. They just laugh it off. It's something they learn in the convent I guess. You got to put your knuckle right in to the temple. It scrambles their eyesight. Sometimes they think they're seeing Jebus and it scares the crap out of them.

Second, I had a mullet for maybe three of those ten assaults. It was a phase. I grew out of it. Just like when I stopped using yellow nylon cord to bind their arms. Now it's Duct tape. It's quick and it sticks.

Third and lastly, they always end the piece with the Hoffman murder. I never touched housewives with kids. It's not in my MO. Besides, I was up in Ogdenville torturing Sister Mary Ellen. I could get back down there with in that time frame to rape and kill that housewife. Maybe dad could but I like to be methodical. Maybe that's why one of us is waiting for the needle in Joliet and the other is sizing up his next victim over at St. Mary's Academy for the Deaf. Oops.


A friend of mine was portrayed on "America's Most Wanted". He's a pudgy pug faced sort of guy, yet the actor was out of a Hollywood casting office, tall good looking etc. He loved it. Oh, he just helped hide a body, so he turned states evidence and then went all religious. He did find the segment in AMW hilarious, though.

 
Knucklepopper
2009-11-07 09:34:39 AM


colatf: cajones

CojOnes, from the verb cojér, meaning, to fark. As in tools to fark with.
Cajones are bureau drawers.

 
colatf
2009-11-07 09:35:54 AM


Knucklepopper: colatf: cajones

CojOnes, from the verb cojér, meaning, to fark. As in tools to fark with.
Cajones are bureau drawers.


Thanks for the tip.

 
Madbassist1
2009-11-07 10:42:35 AM


dumbass? I think not retardmitter

 
EggFool
2009-11-07 10:43:33 AM


"He is a berk. He thinks he is being clever by showing off like this, but we'll have him in soon now," one officer said.

Now he's done it, the cheeky bugger! The jig is up, now that he's updated our file for us!

 
dlewis6
2009-11-07 10:46:49 AM


So am I the only one that thinks he's kind of a badass?

 
brigid_fitch
2009-11-07 11:29:28 AM


I have a friend who would appreciate this. About 10 years ago, there was a guy who was breaking into people's houses & crawling into bed with small boys. He didn't molest them--he would just try to sleep in their beds w/them. One homeowner had a CCTV camera & caught a grainy shot of the guy & the picture was run on the front page of all the local papers.

Problem is, w/the graininess, the guy in the pic looked a LOT like my friend. Enough so that he was brought in for a line-up (despite the fact that he had alibis for 3 of the 6 incidents, 2 of them were being away for Guard duty).

I don't know if they ever caught the guy, but my friend was cleared. But he sure got REALLY weird looks for weeks after that picture ran in the paper.

/I know, I know--cool story, bro.

 
Githerax
2009-11-07 11:34:15 AM


dlewis6: So am I the only one that thinks he's kind of a badass?

You'll grow out of it when you're in your 20's.

 
Githerax
2009-11-07 11:35:05 AM


Githerax: dlewis6: So am I the only one that thinks he's kind of a badass?

You'll grow out of it when you're in your 20's.


*checks profile*

Maybe 30's.

 
dlewis6
2009-11-07 12:16:19 PM


Githerax: Githerax: dlewis6: So am I the only one that thinks he's kind of a badass?

You'll grow out of it when you're in your 20's.

*checks profile*

Maybe 30's.


Do you really grow out of liking fun? Go ahead and bury me at 29 then.

 
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