Nevertheless, I must warn you that in future you should delete the words 'crunchy frog', and replace them with the legend 'crunchy raw unboned real dead frog', if you want to avoid prosecution.

Was a two page list really necessary?

Superevil: Was a two page list really necessary?

It was if you consider the ad revenue.

Also, I wasn't too shocked by anything on that list. So boiled insects make red food coloring? Cool, whatever. As long as it's not toxic they could make it from dog placenta for all I care.

How can a beaver have anal glands?!

Snarfangel: Nevertheless, I must warn you that in future you should delete the words 'crunchy frog', and replace them with the legend 'crunchy raw unboned real dead frog', if you want to avoid prosecution.

I prefer spring surprise!

Larks' tongues. Wrens' livers. Chaffinch brains. Jaguars' earlobes. Beavers' anal glands. Get 'em while they're hot.

BearToy: Anthrax Ripple!

Cockroach Cluster!

UberDave: How can a beaver have anal glands?!

Yeah, it was a shocker to me as well.

BEAVERS!

ANAL!

what's not to like?!

/dnrtfa

Anal gland?
Damn near killed im.

This list looks rather tame to me.

You should see what they put into cigarettes.

Sick? What are you talking about? That's the best part.

chimpanzee acne

and of course, moosebumps

I prefer the chuckle.

I like the myth surrounding the discovery of cheese. A guy has some milk on a warm day in a container made from a cow's stomach.

It comes out all as not milk, but tastes good (think crème fraîche) and more importantly doesn't kill him or make him sick.

//Probably pretty close to the truth.

Source of salicylic acid from munching on willow bark.

/reading a history that mentioned castoreum. Happy living in an age where we have aspirin in convenient tablet form.

I love how some of them are the "the same chemicals found in" stuff. Or it's "chemical extracted" from something. Like the bread thing, you're not eating hair, your eating a chemical that's found in hair and that's the easiest thing to extract it from.

OK. Where do they get the beavers from? Is there some sort of beaver farm (in Canada, I would guess) that raises cute flat-tailed furry animals just for their prized anal glands? Who had that idea? "Heck, Earl! Them beaver asses are like furry black gold! All we need is a pond and a dream!"

Hell I'd try any of those, of course I would have to be really drunk. Plus There's always the vomit option if I don't like it.

Sybarite: Larks' tongues. Wrens' livers. Chaffinch brains. Jaguars' earlobes. Beavers' anal glands. Get 'em while they're hot.

When did they discontinue wolf nipple chips?

Scale of dragon, tooth of wolf,
Witches' mummy, maw and gulf
Of the ravin'd salt-sea shark,
Beaver's asshole digg'd i' the dark.

Disregard my last comment. I'm trashed, done commenting for the night. Don't want to make myself any more derpy than I already am.

tillerman35: OK. Where do they get the beavers from? Is there some sort of beaver farm (in Canada, I would guess) that raises cute flat-tailed furry animals just for their prized anal glands? Who had that idea? "Heck, Earl! Them beaver asses are like furry black gold! All we need is a pond and a dream!"

Probably get the glands from when the animals are skinned for fur.

Waste not, want not.

you mean those aren't raspberry seeds that get caught in my teeth?

Nice Beaver!

Thanks, I just threw it up!

this whole article wreaks of vegan propoganda. "OOOOoooh everything with animal byproducts OOOOoooh nasty! Don't eat meat!"

Fark them all, I hope the author of this article can DIAF.

They have Cochineal on the list. List is a fail.

Seriously, the stuff was worth more the gold at many points through history, before we had good red dyes. It was literally the only stuff that made a vivid true red, and it was only available from the new world. It's still used as a clothes dye for people who have sensitivities to certain chemicals, because it's very gentle and nonreactive as a chemical, making it great for food. We pump a lot of harsh industrial chemicals in our foot that are much worse then that.

What's wrong with eating bugs anyways? Protein. Nothing strange about the chemicals that make them up, they're a staple item in many places. Great nutritionally.

\If interested in offbeat takes on history, Read a Perfect Red.
\\Very interesting look at the history of European exploration into the new world.

Remarkable raspberry

What's wrong with silicon dioxide or ammonium sulfate? Perfectly good chemicals.

Carmine? Since when is cochineal called carmine? And I've known it was made from bugs since I was in grade school. Do people actually get grossed out by that? Man, what a bunch of pussies.

Beaver's Rasberry Rectum would make a great name for a rock band.

tillerman35: OK. Where do they get the beavers from? Is there some sort of beaver farm (in Canada, I would guess) that raises cute flat-tailed furry animals just for their prized anal glands? Who had that idea? "Heck, Earl! Them beaver asses are like furry black gold! All we need is a pond and a dream!"

Manditory commercial about Canadian beaver quantities (new window)

lordargent: Cthulhu Theory : this whole article wreaks of vegan propoganda stupidity. "OOOOoooh everything with animal byproducts we can't understand, OOOOoooh nasty! Don't eat meat!"

Fixed

Don't you tread on my masterpiece you obvious vegan troll/mole/SPY!

/faux-rage off

Cthulhu Theory: this whole article wreaks of vegan propoganda. "OOOOoooh everything with animal byproducts OOOOoooh nasty! Don't eat meat!"

I think you're right. The very end of the article says you should make a vegetarian meal for Thanksgiving.

I don't eat vegetables because birds poop on them.

UberDave: How can a beaver have anal glands?!

I would guess that they are scent glands, which seems to make sense to me if it is added as a flavouring agent. It would also be likely that the scent could be collected without killing the animal.

After all, while we may want to have a new beaver each and every time, it's usually simpler, safer, and more practical to stick with the one you know for a while.

These animals are usually killed for the muscle meat, so why is it bad when use the rest of the animal instead of wasting it?
Processed food is bad, but not for using ingredients that make you go "ew".

real shaman: Snarfangel: Nevertheless, I must warn you that in future you should delete the words 'crunchy frog', and replace them with the legend 'crunchy raw unboned real dead frog', if you want to avoid prosecution.

I prefer spring surprise!

Yeah, well pass the damn box over here, some of us are hoping no one's eaten the Ram's Bladder Cup yet. (gotta love that lark's vomit garnish!)

shanrick: Anal gland?
Damn near killed im.

ORLY?

BumpInTheNight

I was hoping you'd pop in this thread. I have you farky'd as "Where I live the beavers chase men and typically in large packs.".

"7. Human Hair and/or Duck Feathers in Bread

What's in your morning bagel? If you get it from Noah's Bagels, it contains either human hair or duck feathers, and it's your guess as to which. The substance, called L-cysteine or cystine, is used as a dough conditioner to produce a specific consistency. While artificial cysteine is available, it is cost prohibitive and mostly used to create kosher and halal products."

Noah's started off kosher. I always hated when they switched.

So do they have to kill a lot of beavers or does one gland go a long way? What's the candy to gland ratio?

On a side note, I thought beavers were protected. If not, where can I purchase beaver meat?

Then one day, I said to myself, "You know what...I'm gonna go start a farm. A beaver anal gland farm...hell...maybe even an organic beaver anal gland farm.

/beaver anal gland

RoxtarRyan: BumpInTheNight

I was hoping you'd pop in this thread. I have you farky'd as "Where I live the beavers chase men and typically in large packs.".

Oh my yes yes, I always try to impart some key survival tips in any threads about them, so slippery and cunning they are. For instance even despite the chilling climate they're taken to removing their fur to slide smoothly while they hunt. Most of us here are good at spotting them though, you can always tell by the distinct tail whether its one of those sneaky beavers or just some wilder beast lurking in the dark corner of your local bar.

Its still strange how you can go for months without seeing one and then bam a whole pack of them are all over you, I guess its like any other situation where once one of them's gotten your scent and likes it the rest start to come out of the wood works for the competition, just sick when you think about how they treat it like some kind of sport.

Once in a while though you hear them catch someone late at night, usually its after a long night of drinking and our face guards are down. I tell you the screams and slapping noises will haunt your dreams. We'll put up a good fight and make them work for it though, usually for hours.

I have some bad news for you vegans, you are probably eating a hell of a lot more bugs in your salad than I am in my sausage.


And about all those animal parts? fark it, I don't care. If it makes the food I eat taste better, look better, and generally all around appear more awesome then grind up those beetles and shave those beavers.

And for all you ladies out there?

Civet glands.

It's a fair cop.

Beware the Cherry Fondue -- it is extremely nasty.