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(CSMonitor) Stupid If you dress your child in camouflage, you are a bad parent   (csmonitor.com) divider line 311
More: Stupid, Timothy, blue jeans, balloons, button-down shirt, connotations, perfumes, stereotypes, cakes  
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20171 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Nov 2009 at 12:56 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

311 Comments   (+0 »)


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Dr.Fey [TotalFark] 2009-11-06 12:51:01 PM  
www.fantasticfiction.co.uk

You're doin' it wrong.

 
lajimi [TotalFark] 2009-11-06 12:53:13 PM  
But....But....If the terrorists invade they can safely hide in the salad bar.

 
WTF Indeed 2009-11-06 12:58:27 PM  
It only goes downhill from there.
www.ruethedayblog.com

 
JRoo 2009-11-06 12:59:00 PM  
That's because they become so easy to lose.

Especially in the park.

 
Kim Jong B Illin [TotalFark] 2009-11-06 12:59:10 PM  
my girls all have Realtree dresses, it's cute and makes hide and seek here in the woods even more fun.

 
wage0048 2009-11-06 12:59:27 PM  
I've always thought the the most effective defense against terrorism was to make everyone entering the country eat a strip of bacon (or ham for the health nuts out there).

Then again, I think that instead of dropping bombs on caves in Afghanistan, we should be dropping 1000 lb bags of pig shiat.

 
amazing_live_seamonkeys 2009-11-06 12:59:28 PM  
This article is gay.

 
Tatsuhiko 2009-11-06 12:59:34 PM  
[ ] Wearing camo means you're in the Army.

[ ] You're in the Army, so you're wearing camo.

/One of these statements is false.
//Most parents failed.

 
PanicMan 2009-11-06 12:59:57 PM  
No, it's babies that shouldn't be in camoflage:

1. If they crawl away, how are you going to find them?

2. The impracticalities of taking a baby hunting should be obvious. He can't hold a gun, and he's going to give your position away (kicking, screaming). Camoflage won't help.

 
ThatOneChick 2009-11-06 01:00:46 PM  
Especially if his name is Hunter.

 
AmazingRuss 2009-11-06 01:01:09 PM  
Civilians should only wear camo with plaid, paisley, or tie die.

/fashion terrorist

 
AbbeySomeone 2009-11-06 01:01:24 PM  
Dr.Fey: You're doin' it wrong.

I love David Sedaris! Have you heard the audiobooks? Much better when he reads his own work.

/who cares what people wear
//camoflauge is gay

 
Knucklepopper 2009-11-06 01:01:42 PM  
TFA: While any of it is still under my control at all, I'll dress my little boy in all he needs to adorn or delight him, which generally ranges from red T-shirts to orange ones to ones with bright, happy stripes or the occasional thing with a monkey.

Poor kid caught teh ghey before he had a chance.

 
Maggie_Luna 2009-11-06 01:02:21 PM  
PanicMan: No, it's babies that shouldn't be in camoflage:

1. If they crawl away, how are you going to find them?

2. The impracticalities of taking a baby hunting should be obvious. He can't hold a gun, and he's going to give your position away (kicking, screaming). Camoflage won't help.


They make pretty good bait if you're hunting hunting animals though! Just make sure you have a spare in case you're not a fast enough shot or there's more than one. Babies are a lot of labor don't want it wasted all at once, you know.

 
gezortenplotz 2009-11-06 01:02:44 PM  
Dear Laraine Perri,

In case you didn't notice, your panties are unnecessarily in a wad. Go to your nearest Christian Science Reading room and calm the fark down.

 
honk 2009-11-06 01:02:47 PM  
There is no getting around the fact that camouflage has threatening connotations.

As do the bright colors you're promoting. Dress your daughter in red and other bright colors? Are you trying to turn her into a whore?

Good grief.

 
daveydave 2009-11-06 01:03:41 PM  
Kids like camo. It's cool looking.

 
AmazingRuss 2009-11-06 01:04:22 PM  
Maggie_Luna: PanicMan: No, it's babies that shouldn't be in camoflage:

1. If they crawl away, how are you going to find them?

2. The impracticalities of taking a baby hunting should be obvious. He can't hold a gun, and he's going to give your position away (kicking, screaming). Camoflage won't help.

They make pretty good bait if you're hunting hunting animals though! Just make sure you have a spare in case you're not a fast enough shot or there's more than one. Babies are a lot of labor don't want it wasted all at once, you know.


You can pick up crack babies pretty cheap a few days before the welfare checks come out. Their thin, feeble cries really bring in the coyotes, too.

 
FarkIlk01 2009-11-06 01:04:29 PM  
They can't be hunters?

 
MDGeist 2009-11-06 01:04:30 PM  
Apparently my so called Christian brethren are running out of things to cry about.

 
johnbc5 2009-11-06 01:04:39 PM  
If you dress your kid in camo, the kids most likely also have a mullet or rat tail

 
Rev. Skarekroe [TotalFark] 2009-11-06 01:04:54 PM  
Well, duh.
Think about how hard it would be to find them if they went missing?

 
The Popes cousin Count Popeula 2009-11-06 01:05:18 PM  
I've never seen a child in cammo.

I bet they are hidden.

 
PanicMan 2009-11-06 01:05:23 PM  
Maggie_Luna: They make pretty good bait if you're hunting hunting animals though! Just make sure you have a spare in case you're not a fast enough shot or there's more than one. Babies are a lot of labor don't want it wasted all at once, you know.

Hmm, I didn't think of that. Does the baby camoflage trick bears into thinking they're part of nature? Like, a bear knows not to eat a baby wearing an Addidas track suit, because it's not natural?

 
jaytkay 2009-11-06 01:05:49 PM  
I'll dress my little boy in all he needs to adorn or delight him, which generally ranges from red T-shirts to orange ones to ones with bright, happy stripes or the occasional thing with a monkey.

mentalfloss.cachefly.net

 
undefgeek 2009-11-06 01:06:02 PM  
AbbeySomeone: Dr.Fey: You're doin' it wrong.

I love David Sedaris! Have you heard the audiobooks? Much better when he reads his own work.

/who cares what people wear
//camoflauge is gay


I'm not sure if he still does this, but he used to appear regularly as an NPR commentator. Those were often obscenely funny. I couldn't get into reading the books, but I bet his presentation in the audiobooks makes for some worthwhile listening.

 
palelizard 2009-11-06 01:06:17 PM  
Maggie_Luna: They make pretty good bait if you're hunting hunting animals though! Just make sure you have a spare in case you're not a fast enough shot or there's more than one. Babies are a lot of labor don't want it wasted all at once, you know.

Don't be ridiculous. It's like smoking after a night of drinking--you don't have to bring your own, just find someone else with a few.

 
ranfour 2009-11-06 01:06:39 PM  
Cue Ted Nugent pics in 3, 2...

 
dogdaze [TotalFark] 2009-11-06 01:06:45 PM  
That's half the county I live in, esp this time of year.

Yea cammo!
i219.photobucket.com

 
Tyee 2009-11-06 01:06:46 PM  
Wow, isn't she a terribly judgmental biatch.

//Haven't worn camo since my duck hunting days.

 
OtherLittleGuy 2009-11-06 01:06:49 PM  
MDGeist: Apparently my so called Christian brethren are running out of things to cry about.

It's not like Christian Scientists have a good health care plan.

 
playdate [TotalFark] 2009-11-06 01:07:06 PM  
i257.photobucket.com

more inappropriate clothes for kids

 
schattenteufel [TotalFark] 2009-11-06 01:07:14 PM  
Attention Walmart Shoppers...


You're all that's wrong with America.


That is all.

 
gregory311 2009-11-06 01:07:17 PM  
Boy, is she going to be pissed when her little snowflake hits prep school and is forced to wear a, gasp! Uniform! What will happen to her brightly colored peacock of a child when that happens?

/Lighten up, Francis.

 
SubLiterate 2009-11-06 01:07:20 PM  
The 2 reasons to wear camouflage:

1. You are in the military, on-base/in-theatre.
2. You are a hunter, in the woods, hunting.

Anything else is just a bad fashion statement...

/Remind me what sub-culture co-opted the lamest style evah?
//Children should neither be seen nor heard...

 
drewblank 2009-11-06 01:07:38 PM  
My 4-year-old daughter had a camouflage sweatshirt with helicopters worked into the pattern that was left over from a Halloween costume (she wanted to be a helicopter pilot) and she would wear it two or three times a week while it still fit.

I didn't mind the military aspects of the clothes (I used to wear camouflage and military uniform parts all the time growing up) but I didn't want people thinking I was some sort of redneck deer hunter.

And I'm talking specifically about the redneck deer hunters who take their kids out with them at 4 a.m. during deer season, and then drop the kids off at school in little deer hunting jackets on four hours sleep with a pickup bed full of beer cans. I don't want them trying to bond with me because my daughter likes helicopters.

 
walkerhound 2009-11-06 01:07:40 PM  
Ironic that this is in the Christian Science Monitor.

I'll dress my little boy in...the occasional thing with a monkey


i76.photobucket.com

/Hot like a mustache ride

 
PanicMan 2009-11-06 01:07:43 PM  
The Popes cousin Count Popeula: I've never seen a child in cammo.

I bet they are hidden.


Feast your eyes on the Cabella's infant camoflage (new window) section.

 
EggFool [TotalFark] 2009-11-06 01:08:06 PM  
Her little nerd is in a "tiny button-down shirt with stripes the colors of popsicles" and she's sassing the cammo moms?! Root beer popsicles or cherry? This is important.

 
jaytkay 2009-11-06 01:08:33 PM  
daveydave: [Camo is] cool looking.

www.scavengeinc.com

 
TallyGirl 2009-11-06 01:09:12 PM  
I agree with this.

Unless you're taking your kid hunting, and even then they should be 12 or something. And don't give them a gun and put that orange thing on them.

But camo to school screams "redneck" and you don't want your kid getting labeled.

And stay away from tie dye. Just because you were a hippy doesn't mean your kid is cool with it.

/that is all

 
sonofagun 2009-11-06 01:09:21 PM  
HOORAY REPEAT..

 
Ant 2009-11-06 01:09:32 PM  
I dressed my four-year-old son in camouflage this morning, and I haven't seen him since...

 
FarkIlk01 2009-11-06 01:10:15 PM  
Here's a picture (new window) of the kids.

 
Balder333 [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-11-06 01:10:26 PM  
Heh - I just went to Wallmart to but a camo jacket for the company paintball extravaganza tomorrow (so I'm getting a kick out of these replys, etc)

 
fappomatic 2009-11-06 01:10:39 PM  
My 15yr old's favorite clothing is a pair of Cabela's Fusion 3D camo jeans and a plain white t-shirt. I guess that'll somehow render him socially undesireable despite his honor-roll status, natural intelligence and ability to detect bullshiat from several states away.

You, Loraine, are an inept twat.

 
IonBeam2 2009-11-06 01:11:11 PM  
Giving birth causes brain damage.

 
daveydave 2009-11-06 01:11:29 PM  
drewblank: My 4-year-old daughter had a camouflage sweatshirt with helicopters worked into the pattern that was left over from a Halloween costume (she wanted to be a helicopter pilot) and she would wear it two or three times a week while it still fit.

I didn't mind the military aspects of the clothes (I used to wear camouflage and military uniform parts all the time growing up) but I didn't want people thinking I was some sort of redneck deer hunter.
drewblank: My 4-year-old daughter had a camouflage sweatshirt with helicopters worked into the pattern that was left over from a Halloween costume (she wanted to be a helicopter pilot) and she would wear it two or three times a week while it still fit.

I didn't mind the military aspects of the clothes (I used to wear camouflage and military uniform parts all the time growing up) but I didn't want people thinking I was some sort of redneck deer hunter.

And I'm talking specifically about the redneck deer hunters who take their kids out with them at 4 a.m. during deer season, and then drop the kids off at school in little deer hunting jackets on four hours sleep with a pickup bed full of beer cans. I don't want them trying to bond with me because my daughter likes helicopters.


And I'm talking specifically about the redneck deer hunters who take their kids out with them at 4 a.m. during deer season, and then drop the kids off at school in little deer hunting jackets on four hours sleep with a pickup bed full of beer cans. I don't want them trying to bond with me because my daughter likes helicopters.


7/10

 
Liberally1337 2009-11-06 01:11:33 PM  
You might be a redneck if...

 
vudukungfu 2009-11-06 01:12:12 PM  
How else will the children hide from zombie jeebus when the rapture comes?

 
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