I love that band... if only they'd get rid of that chick singer.

It looks better if I imagine the croutons to be chunks of feta.
mmm feta.

Though this salad is not for rent
Put down a bid payment
The croutons, a quiet enhance
Rounding out the salad's aftertaste
The DRESSING

/probably trying too hard

Croutons are what make me tingly. I'm serious. I'm crou-tingly.

GAT_00: Though this salad is not for rent
Put down a bid payment
The croutons, a quiet enhance
Rounding out the salad's aftertaste
The DRESSING

/probably trying too hard

HAHAHAHA! I LOL'd
very nice effort

i'd pay to watch him fight a cop again

/BY-TOR!

GAT_00: Though this salad is not for rent
Put down a bid payment
The croutons, a quiet enhance
Rounding out the salad's aftertaste
The DRESSING

/probably trying too hard

i would've gone with:
rounding out the salad's event.

/you tried harder than i would've.

And the chefs who make the salads
Must be the ones who start
To lower bad cholesterol
Its better for your heart
Its better for your heart

The lard ass and the fat chick
Neglected their weight charts
They're clogging up their arteries
Destructive to their hearts
Yeah, destructive to their hearts

Triglycerides and cholesterol
Each will do its part
To clog that precious artery
Connected to your heart
Yeah, it's connected to your heart

You can be the tomato
and I will be the cuke
Sitting under feta cheese
Its better for your heart
Better for for your heart......

Yeah, better for your heart

pheelix: And the chefs who make the salads
Must be the ones who start
To lower bad cholesterol
Its better for your heart
Its better for your heart

The lard ass and the fat chick
Neglected their weight charts
They're clogging up their arteries
Destructive to their hearts
Yeah, destructive to their hearts

Triglycerides and cholesterol
Each will do its part
To clog that precious artery
Connected to your heart
Yeah, it's connected to your heart

You can be the tomato
and I will be the cuke
Sitting under feta cheese
Its better for your heart
Better for for your heart......

Yeah, better for your heart

excellent, pheelix, yer a poet and ya don't even know it

santadog: I love that band... if only they'd get rid of that chick singer.

And man ain't she ugly!

well, at least he can paint

pretty sure its feta cheese. the olive and cucumbers lead me to believe that this is a Greek salad.

/hungry

And let's not forget hits like...

Salad Dressings
(..."Down on aisle twelve, on the pantry shelves; bleu cheese will be cast out...")

Pork-Cry
(..."One day it means that I'm OK with plain greens, and the next it's really boring me; I can get bacon, I can get bacon... "...)

White-wine
(..."Dining in with white wine, the universal drink"...)

The Spirits of Radio
(..."Dispense me some bubbly, sparkling on ice; bright and tasty, fizzing with intensity"...)

RUSH rocks!

Let's not forget Red Tomato

I strip away the fetta cheese
As I leave the salad bar.
A brilliant red Tomato from a
Better, withered vine.

Pouring on the salad dressing
It's vegetables galore.
Lettuce spitting everywhere
As I begin to dine.

pheelix: And the chefs who make the salads
Must be the ones who start
To lower bad cholesterol
Its better for your heart
Its better for your heart

The lard ass and the fat chick
Neglected their weight charts
They're clogging up their arteries
Destructive to their hearts
Yeah, destructive to their hearts

Triglycerides and cholesterol
Each will do its part
To clog that precious artery
Connected to your heart
Yeah, it's connected to your heart

You can be the tomato
and I will be the cuke
Sitting under feta cheese
Its better for your heart
Better for for your heart......

Yeah, better for your heart

This is full of win.

Meh. I'll wait for his Portrait of Lasagna on a Wooden Leg to come up for bid, thanks.

I salute all of you songsmiths, great stuff! Another great Fark thread thanks to some creative posters. Red Tomato was my favorite, but they were all good.

TxRockBass: Meh. I'll wait for his Portrait of Lasagna on a Wooden Leg to come up for bid, thanks.

Marty? XD

We've taken care of everything
The feta cheese and salad greens
A picture that gives pleasure to your eyes
Oh, what a nice delicious meal
A pity that it isn't real
Come enjoy a feast fit for your eyes

We are the chefs...

I needed a good chuckle this morning. Thank you all. Please carry on.

Begin the meal with a friendly course,
A salad unobtrusive...

Obnox: We've taken care of everything
The feta cheese and salad greens
A picture that gives pleasure to your eyes
Oh, what a nice delicious meal
A pity that it isn't real
Come enjoy a feast fit for your eyes

We are the chefs...

Thank you, that one made my day.

There is dressing on the salad,
There are hunks of feta cheese.
But the bar, it wasn't covered and the guy before me sneezed.

came to this thread for low-grade flaming. imagine my surprise when i instead had to settle for well-wrought comedy jokes.

/thread does not deliver

Begin the day with some feta cheese
And its companion olive oil
Tastes like something that's so elusive
And the magic flavors make your morning mood

Off on your way as you slice the tomato
There is magic at your fingers
Feel the ripeness of the cucumbers
Demanding freshness in ceramic salad bowl

Delicious croutons crackle with life
Olive oil glistens like the morning dew
Enjoying the salad is a timeless tradition
Bearing a gift beyond price, almost free

All this machinery, farming modern produce
Can still be open-hearted
Up until the harvest it's really just a question
Of maturity, it's maturity yeah!

One likes to believe the healthy freedom of salad
But fattening fast food and endless advertisements
Shatter the illusion of a healthy meal today

Pour the oil around the cherry that was placed on top of it all
Enjoy it now
And savor, with some salt, the tomatoes. Tomatoes. Tomatoes.

pheelix: Begin the day with some feta cheese
And its companion olive oil
Tastes like something that's so elusive
And the magic flavors make your morning mood

Off on your way as you slice the tomato
There is magic at your fingers
Feel the ripeness of the cucumbers
Demanding freshness in your ceramic salad bowl

Delicious croutons crackle with life
Olive oil glistens like the morning dew
Enjoying the salad is a timeless tradition
Bearing a gift beyond price, almost free

All this machinery, farming modern produce
Can still be open-hearted
Up until the harvest it's really just a question
Of maturity, it's maturity yeah!

One likes to believe the healthy freedom of salad
But fattening fast food and endless advertisements
Shatter the illusion of a healthy meal today

Pour the oil around the cherry that was placed on top of it all
Enjoy it now
And savor, with some salt, the tomatoes. Tomatoes. Tomatoes.

/Oops. Fixed it.

Sure, I have a bid.

Here's $1.36, dicktree.

Safeway salesmen calling
"come buy some fruit from me"
Tin-can-speaker blasting
same old muzak-melody
A dozen dollar wonders
We could ask for more
Chock full of fibre
My colon pleads 'no more'

Greek salad
Lettuce with no leaves
Greek salad
You're in my memories

WTF? who the hell paints a salad??!?!?!???

no clever name here just move along: WTF? who the hell paints a salad??!?!?!???

Alex Lifeson, that's who!

ranfour: There is dressing on the salad,
There are hunks of feta cheese.
But the bar, it wasn't covered and the guy before me sneezed.

Bravo!

As green leaves of lettuce fill the mind's eye,
the three customers, men of Willowdale,
emerge from the restaurant shadow.
Ordering the meal grown from the lawn, they urn to fill their mouth journeying into the light and tossed meals of the Saladmancer
Even now the aroma of his healthy food can be smelt,
teasing the stomach and healing the heart
Ultimately they will become full, satisfied guests...
filled of lettuce and olive oil, only
their thirst for health gives them hunger for salad ingredients...'

no YYZ lyrics? What gives?


/dododo dododo do duh, do doo dah dididdidedaa deh da

I was hoping for a FARK adaptation of "The Trees"

/ not poetically creative, myself.

Forbidden Doughnut: I was hoping for a FARK adaptation of "The Trees"

/ not poetically creative, myself.

Ask, and you shall receive.


There is unrest in the kitchen
There is trouble with the food,
For the cukes just want to spread out
But the tomatoes won't be fooled.

The trouble with tomatoes,
Is that they're ugly if they get blight
They say the cukes will get all moldy
If they gets left out over night
And the cukes can't help their feelings
About the tomatoes at any rate
And they wonder why the tomatoes
Can't be happy to share the plate.

There was trouble with the salad,
As the oil began to spread,
As the cucumbers scream oppression!
And the tomatoes just shake their heads.

So the cukes they formed a union,
And demanded equal rights
"The tomatoes are just too greedy;
We will make them share the plate"
Now there's no more red oppression,
For they passed a noble law,
And the veggies are all kept equal
By napkin, spoon and fork.

we are the chefs
who make salad
in the kitchen
then we go and paint them
and then auction them off

we are the chefs
we make salads
and paint them
if only they were tasty
we might eat them instead
----------
I can't believe you're saying
These things just can't be true
Our world could use this salad
Just taste its tender hues

Come and eat my salad
And feel what it can do
There's something here that's as strong as life
I know that it will feed you

Don't annoy us further!
Ah, we don't like rabbit food!
Just think of all the steaks to eat
What use have we for cukes?
Tofu and soy for silly boys!
Not fit for a man!
Forget about your silly dish
Give me a can of spam!

(Solo)