?

If this thing never works it will prove something

Damn, now we're gonna have this story greenlit 5 more times...

Nic Cage?

busboy207
hopefully the next headline will be properly spelled...
(my bad...owning it)

Future Flock!

So wait, the LHC has a case of Bird flew? Well shiat.

God's scared of the large hardon collider.

/Not sure which one ...

beelzebubba76: God's scared of the large hardon collider.

/Not sure which one ...

"Higgs Boson, Higgs Boson, Higgs Boson ... " ... oh crap!

Whatcha guano do now?

beelzebubba76: God's scared of the large hardon collider.

/Not sure which one ...

He's just self conscious about being naked.

At this point, the LHC wiping out its own future is quickly becoming the most likely explanation.

How many birds died to get the plans of the LHC to the rebel flock so they would know the exact weak point to drop a piece of bread?
"I used to bullseye windshields back at home. They aren't much bigger than 2 meters."

They're just getting their revenge.

jepzilla: At this point, the LHC wiping out its own future is quickly becoming the most likely explanation.

Yes. It couldn't have anything to do with the fact that it is the most complex machine ever built. Definitely mysterious particles from the future.

This story just makes me facepalm. "OMG! The LHC broke again. Well, it didn't break, but it totally could have."

This thing is being run by the same people as the Big Dig, isn't it?

jepzilla: At this point, the LHC wiping out its own future is quickly becoming the most likely explanation.

No, it's not.

lern 2 likelihood

Bird from future wanted for questioning

At least the Time Scoop hasn't picked up any butterflies yet.

/obscure?

Was it a European swallow? Or an African swallow?

At least it wasn't a swallow with a coconut (new window)

At least the birds didn't sabotage the LHC.

In other news, the LHC doesn't have a metal cover or something to keep shiat from getting into it.

Brown Sauce: At least it wasn't a swallow with a coconut (new window)

Thanks Brown Sauce. That was, um, unique. I certainly never expected robots.

/approves
//hot like a Big Hose-on
//or whatever

Strauuman: Thanks Brown Sauce. That was, um, unique. I certainly never expected robots.

We call 'em "Transformers" 'round these parts.

Strauuman: I certainly never expected robots.

No one expects robots! That is their key weapon, surprise and fear! Their two, two weapons! Surprise, fear, and a commitment to defend the world from the Decepticons! Amongst their many weapons are surprise, fear, a commitment to defend the world from the Decepticons, and durable metal.

I'll come in again.

t3knomanser: and durable metal.

Aww, that would have been better if I had remembered to add "bodies".

//approves

Dredge: busboy207
hopefully the next headline will be properly spelled...
(my bad...owning it)

Props for owning up to the spelling mistake. But what can you expect from a guy who graditated from a pass-fail college?

/Yeah, I know. I am a funny guy with a Barley Pop...

Suspects?

wasn't it a squirrel or something that dropped a tree branch on some power cords and took out half of the country like 6 years ago?

busboy207: Damn, now we're gonna have this story greenlit 5 more times...

No. It has already been greenlit 5 times. Tomorrow will be the 4th time. Sometime early next week, it will be greenlit for the 3rd time. By next weekend, it will be for the 2nd time. Finally, on or around the 18th, the story will break and Fark will greenlight it for the first time ever.

I can't wait. :D

I think they should delay until December 21, 2012. If you really want to ramp up interest in science that should about do it.

/hot like the year 9595

You'll wish it was just the future sabotaging the LHC...

If this thing never works it will prove something

That the truth_is_stranger_than_fishin:?

the_colonel: How many birds died to get the plans of the LHC to the rebel flock so they would know the exact weak point to drop a piece of bread?
"I used to bullseye windshields back at home. They aren't much bigger than 2 meters."

Awesome! *showing wife, she'll LOVE it!*

Diogenes

I think you are on to something there. Perhaps all these delays will continue until December 21, 2012!

I don't believe this story. It's a joke CERN is playing on everyone. I just looked at their website for the first time in months this morning, and there was nothing wrong.

In fact, I was going to make a joke on my Fb status about how ridiculous sounding that the last thing on their checklist has been checked off, and it's the "Turbo molecular pump".

It's a joke, just like putting the Gordon Freeman guy in that picture. Next will be that Tom "Mr. Angels and Demons Antimatter" Hanks tripped and broke something while on a tour of the LHC.

/ I'm sure something else seriously important happened today that isn't in the news; that's the way it works

I think it was Ballsy Squirrels that died delivering the stolen plans to the Rebel Flock.

/Baguet Five get set up for your attack run!

Just read:

"The bread was discovered on a busbar - an electrical connection inside one of eight buildings above ground on the 17-mile (27km) circuit in the Swiss countryside."

Inside the building? They're saying a bird dropped it there, or it came from an airplane? How does that work? Then it ends up on a busbar that is how large, out of a device that encompasses a 17 mile circumference?


God doesn't play dice with the universe, and he certainly doesn't let Monty Python write the script.

Impossible. It's a joke!

RubensHakkamacher: Just read:

"The bread was discovered on a busbar - an electrical connection inside one of eight buildings above ground on the 17-mile (27km) circuit in the Swiss countryside."

Inside the building? They're saying a bird dropped it there, or it came from an airplane? How does that work? Then it ends up on a busbar that is how large, out of a device that encompasses a 17 mile circumference?


God doesn't play dice with the universe, and he certainly doesn't let Monty Python write the script.

Impossible. It's a joke!

Haha. Einstein would roll over in his grave. Not only does God play dice, the dice are loaded.

I posted this in the repeat thread that's gonna vanish.

Might as well repeat it here:



From Gizmodo's article: "The LHC has been so plagued by problems and shutdowns that some physicists have wondered if it's being sabotaged by its own future. And the LHC has fallen victim to another bizarre shutdown involving a bird and a baguette.

CERN is reporting that the Large Hadron Collider has been shutdown yet again after a piece of bread fell into the outdoor machinery. That part of the LHC's circuit normally operates at 1.9 Kelvin, but, thanks to the bread bomb, rose to 8 Kelvin, nearly causing the LHC's niobium-titanium magnets to cease superconducting."

Hah! Oh, those birds and their rye humor!

Wheat oughta know better by now. I dough not know what the scientists will do from here.

They explained possible scenarios in that technobabble jargon, but all I could do was twist my head and say, "I baguette your pardon?"

Who could tell what's the matzo with them? They've got funding, so we can't really have too much sorrow or pita for them. If we were to criticize them otherwise, they'd accuse us of throwing scones in a glasshouse.

Well, far be it from me to mill around. Hell, when push comes to shove, I might even go against the grain in the event that they don't boule me over. All the anger over this could turn a friend into focaccia, but I don't care any more.

Next thing you know, bada-boom, bada-bing, there will be nothing left to discuss about the Large Hadron Collider. Really. What will be lefse to say? If we're luchi, we'll find some other area of science to turn our attention to.

And instead of attempting to lavash so much praise upon these supposed innovators, we'll...

...

... um...

...

... err...

...

... damn. I thought I was on a roll.

Now I got muffin.

:-/

Get that bird a lawyer!



/and put it on my Tab

RubensHakkamacher: Inside the building? They're saying a bird dropped it there, or it came from an airplane? How does that work? Then it ends up on a busbar that is how large, out of a device that encompasses a 17 mile circumference?

:O :O :O

The bread was coming from INSIDE THE BUILDING!

RubensHakkamacher: Just read:

"The bread was discovered on a busbar - an electrical connection inside one of eight buildings above ground on the 17-mile (27km) circuit in the Swiss countryside."

Inside the building? They're saying a bird dropped it there, or it came from an airplane? How does that work? Then it ends up on a busbar that is how large, out of a device that encompasses a 17 mile circumference?


God doesn't play dice with the universe, and he certainly doesn't let Monty Python write the script.

Impossible. It's a joke!

I doubt it was actually inside a building, it may have been in an open air shed though.

Anyway, all the bread did was cause some component of the cryogenic cooling system to trip offline. Those things just don't restart very fast is all.