Jaime wins hands down.

Is this website fbxrd already?

Farked?

Why is this in showbiz?

5) wine tester/blogger.

couldn't you just switch that to beer and be way cooler and manlier?

truth_is_stranger_than_fishin: Jaime wins hands down.

Seriously. How is that #4?

1. Paradise Island Caretaker
2. Luxury Bed Tester
3. Resort Waterslide Tester
4. Professional Prostitute Tester
5. Wine Tester and Blogger
6. Candy Taster
7. Condom Tester
8. World Of Warcraft Tester
9. Director Of Fun at a museum (age 6)
10. Bike Rider-Photographer for Google Maps

How is the prostitute tester not at 1?

GoteamVenture: 5) wine tester/blogger.

couldn't you just switch that to beer and be way cooler and manlier?

I get paid to write about beer but it comes up being more like $40 a month and I have to live in a shiatty apartment.

11. Caretaker of the Fireworks, Puppies, and Beer Factory.

12. Tank Driver for NASA.

Just fresh on my mind as I came across this earlier. Sounds like fun to me at least.
NASA M113

I'm pretty sure if you had #1, you could get the rest.

Rambino: truth_is_stranger_than_fishin: Jaime wins hands down.

Seriously. How is that #4?

Not all prostitutes are up to snuff.

I submit to you the host of the show "Three Sheets". Zane travels the world, drinking the local alcoholic beverages and talking about them. He's actually a pretty funny guy and it's a very entertaining show. The show is also a drinking game. Good times.

Link (new window)

I'm kind of thinking that my fat ass would actually hate to be a google maps bike rider. No offense.

Sorry, but this list is incomplete in every way unless it has Zane Lamprey on it. Bastard gets paid to travel to exotic countries and drink booze until his head falls off.

Three Sheets (new window)

doomfistinc: Sorry, but this list is incomplete in every way unless it has Zane Lamprey on it. Bastard gets paid to travel to exotic countries and drink booze until his head falls off.

Three Sheets (new window)

Would that be the same post two above yours?

Too slow!!!!

/muahahahahah

I always thought Bourdain (No Reservations) and to a lesser extent Andrew Zimmern (Bizarre Foods) had what I'd consider to be dream jobs. Travel around the world, eat excellent food, get into all kinds of adventures and still get paid for it all! I liked the Thirsty Traveler (new window) because he didn't have do crazy shiat like Bourdain or Zimmern. More laid back. Plus he gets to booze it up more.

How in the heck can you really test six prostitutes in one day and call it "quality control?" Wouldn't being in the middle of a process of performing and recovering change the impression of the girls in the middle? How is this fair to the last couple of girls? If you can do it six times in one day how does it take you a full month to recharge? Shouldn't a guy with abilities like that be able to handle it again in more like a week? And it seems like pleasuring such a hot stud doesn't necessarily denote quality control for a chick who has to fark some fat old bald guy to get paid.

NannyStatePark: How in the heck can you really test six prostitutes in one day and call it "quality control?" Wouldn't being in the middle of a process of performing and recovering change the impression of the girls in the middle? How is this fair to the last couple of girls? If you can do it six times in one day how does it take you a full month to recharge? Shouldn't a guy with abilities like that be able to handle it again in more like a week? And it seems like pleasuring such a hot stud doesn't necessarily denote quality control for a chick who has to fark some fat old bald guy to get paid.

Fat old bald guys will be happy with just about anything they get.

Our family knows somebody who does #5 for a major wine publication (won't name for confidentiality reasons). He gets sent free cases of some of the nicest and most expensive wines on a regular basis.

Pretty sweet gig if you can get it.

\Great guy to invite to parties.
\\Guess what he brings.

#8 is pure and utter bullshiat. Testing any game, good or bad, is a dull, repetitive, and thankless job. The fact that you're testing WoW is no better, in fact it's probably way worse.

Reverend Otis: #8 is pure and utter bullshiat. Testing any game, good or bad, is a dull, repetitive, and thankless job. The fact that you're testing WoW is no better, in fact it's probably way worse.

This.

You're excited until you realize your job is to check the collision map for every rock in the game.

So next time I visit a brothel, I should look for the "Jaime Rascone Seal of Approval"? Is that a tattoo somewhere?

Inquisitive Inquisitor: Reverend Otis: #8 is pure and utter bullshiat. Testing any game, good or bad, is a dull, repetitive, and thankless job. The fact that you're testing WoW is no better, in fact it's probably way worse.

This.

You're excited until you realize your job is to check the collision map for every rock in the game.

Glad I'm not the only one that noticed that.

/How much do jizz moppers make?

What, does Raime travel the world to test them all like Santa?

There has to be an opening, and it's all mine you slimy farkers, so back off.

#3 would be fun.

Reverend Otis: #8 is pure and utter bullshiat. Testing any game, good or bad, is a dull, repetitive, and thankless job. The fact that you're testing WoW is no better, in fact it's probably way worse.

"Hi. You need to put in 5 more hours of grinding today."
"But I ran ToGC last night until 1am."
"You weren't on the clock. Get back in game and play *insert class tester doesn't want to play."
"Ok."

F that.

cptjeff: Our family knows somebody who does #5 for a major wine publication (won't name for confidentiality reasons). He gets sent free cases of some of the nicest and most expensive wines on a regular basis.

Pretty sweet gig if you can get it.

\Great guy to invite to parties.
\\Guess what he brings.

Prostitutes?

Gimme 2, 5 and 6 with good pay and I'm so there.

I don't know, I got to shoot machine guns at aircraft and NOT have to worry about anyone shooting back.

What is this "job" thing you speak of?

NannyStatePark: How in the heck can you really test six prostitutes in one day and call it "quality control?" Wouldn't being in the middle of a process of performing and recovering change the impression of the girls in the middle? How is this fair to the last couple of girls? If you can do it six times in one day how does it take you a full month to recharge? Shouldn't a guy with abilities like that be able to handle it again in more like a week? And it seems like pleasuring such a hot stud doesn't necessarily denote quality control for a chick who has to fark some fat old bald guy to get paid.

I read the spanish link. The guy is primarily a DJ, but does this on the side. He farks six girls... in one morning, one after the other. Yeah, I can see the "I'm not doing this more than once a month" angle.

/bow to the awesomeness of the vip hooker tester job

cptjeff: Our family knows somebody who does #5 for a major wine publication (won't name for confidentiality reasons). He gets sent free cases of some of the nicest and most expensive wines on a regular basis.

Pretty sweet gig if you can get it.

\Great guy to invite to parties.
\\Guess what he brings.

Herpes?

Doctor Jan Itor: Inquisitive Inquisitor:

/How much do jizz moppers make?

I dunno, man, but it should be a decent amount. That stuff leaves streaks if you don't clean it right away.

Ew, am I the only one here grossed out by "prostitute tester"?

Lollipop165: Ew, am I the only one here grossed out by "prostitute tester"?

I imagine that if the establishment has enough money to pay for a tester, the girls would be clean and decent looking. So yeah, probably.

NannyStatePark: And it seems like pleasuring such a hot stud doesn't necessarily denote quality control for a chick who has to fark some fat old bald guy to get paid.

Hey! I'm not bald.

Lollipop165: Ew, am I the only one here grossed out by "prostitute tester"?

Yes. Yes you are. This is the Sine Qua Non of Jobs. Think about it: Why do most men have jobs? To make money. And why do they want to make Money? To impress girls. And why do they want to impress girls? So they can get sex.

This guy gets all the sex he can handle, AND gets paid for it. If the job somehow included complimentary beer; he would never have to leave work-ever.

Magorn: Lollipop165: Ew, am I the only one here grossed out by "prostitute tester"?

Yes. Yes you are. This is the Sine Qua Non of Jobs. Think about it: Why do most men have jobs? To make money. And why do they want to make Money? To impress girls. And why do they want to impress girls? So they can get sex.

This guy gets all the sex he can handle, AND gets paid for it. If the job somehow included complimentary beer; he would never have to leave work-ever.

Waitwaitwait, this Lillipop165 chick is, indeed, a chick. So that explains the confusion.
(she's cute, too, fellas, and an atheist, and ain't that the Fark trifecta? Cute, non-believer, and alive?)

Baldanders: Lollipop165: Ew, am I the only one here grossed out by "prostitute tester"?

I imagine that if the establishment has enough money to pay for a tester, the girls would be clean and decent looking. So yeah, probably.

The article mentions that he only tests the last round after most of the girls have been filtered out; this includes through medical, psychological and physical exams.

So ya, seems like a good farking job.

Baldanders: Waitwaitwait, this Lillipop165 chick is, indeed, a chick. So that explains the confusion.
(she's cute, too, fellas, and an atheist, and ain't that the Fark trifecta? Cute, non-believer, and alive?)

I seem to recall that she's married. too. Not that it matters.

OldRod: So next time I visit a brothel, I should look for the "Jaime Rascone Seal of Approval"? Is that a tattoo somewhere?

No, check the sheets for his "stain of approval."

Fano:

Fat old bald guys will be happy with just about anything they get.

If I'm going to a brothel that has a quality control stud on retainer then I'd imagine I'm paying a good chunk of money for the prostitute's time, in which case I'd expect her to be pretty damn good at her job.

FTFA: re: Director of Fun Ok, maybe this isn't the best job in the world for an adult, but it certainly rocks the world of a 6 year old.

I'm 47, and that would definitely be near the top of my list.

GoteamVenture: 5) wine tester/blogger.

couldn't you just switch that to beer and be way cooler and manlier?

Some of us have grown up and don't need to try and be cool or manly, we just are.

/likes wine

Inquisitive Inquisitor: Reverend Otis: #8 is pure and utter bullshiat. Testing any game, good or bad, is a dull, repetitive, and thankless job. The fact that you're testing WoW is no better, in fact it's probably way worse.

This.

You're excited until you realize your job is to check the collision map for every rock in the game.

THIS. And you don't get the whole game to check either. You get a small (tiny tiny) portion of the actual play area and test and test, then test some more..

What most people don't realise is that you are NOT actually being paid to play the game. you are paid to look for bugs within the game. Then there's the written report.
BORING!!!

/Used to test games for EA Games.

Missed one: Lesbian Movie Fluffer

Grouchy Old Bear: Missed one: Lesbian Movie Fluffer

What exactly would that involve? What part do they need fluffing?