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(io9) Silly Columnist dares ask the question: Are zombies America's Godzilla? No, I'd say not; most Godzilla movies were competently written   (io9.com) divider line 93
More: Silly, Godzilla, zombies, Westerners, Lauren Davis, Three Mile Island, ambivalence, monsters  
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Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 12:13:44 AM  
img8.imageshack.us


Until zombies get their own crudely animated Saturday morning cartoon series a la The Godzilla Power Hour, I'm going to say no.

 
GoteamVenture 2009-11-04 12:30:20 AM  
i dont know if zombies are a response to "americans fear of over whelming technology." thats a bit of a stretch. i think in these modern times the zombie is a face for the mindless anonymity that the internet gives to people. So there is a tech connection. Or the soulless that corporate culture is breeding in the states today.

 
Rubber Biscuit 2009-11-04 12:31:04 AM  
So what's with all the unfunny troll headlines on FARK lately?

 
braedan 2009-11-04 12:31:16 AM  
Subby can kiss the most rotten part of my ass.

/Z-Power, Z-Power!

 
Tourney3p0 2009-11-04 12:35:55 AM  
Rubber Biscuit: So what's with all the unfunny troll headlines on FARK lately?

Never point out when a headline is an obvious troll. Especially never point out that trolling is specifically forbidden in the Farq. And never, ever ever suggest that perhaps Fark has forsaken its own etiquette in exchange for ad page views.

 
OnmyojiOmn 2009-11-04 12:36:57 AM  
Jennifer will save us!

www.iconsoffright.com

/Hot like Manuela Velasco weeping on the floor of a pitch-black room

 
Fano 2009-11-04 12:38:45 AM  
Though I like zombies, I'll admit they are a fad. A better fad than sparkly vampires, though.

 
Critch 2009-11-04 12:39:44 AM  
I'll take Shaun of the Dead and Zombieland over any of the Godzilla movies. Seriously, aren't they only popular in a "Rocky Horror" sense, just fun to watch and make fun of?

 
RemyDuron 2009-11-04 12:42:52 AM  
Zombies are simple. Zombies are both our fear of "the masses" (all those people who aren't us and are thus idiots who don't know anything) and our fear of disease. There will always be others and always be disease and they will never, ever stop. That's the psychological fear, IMO. The practical fear is that the zombies outnumber you and can outlast you. They will wear you down and kill you because they do not have to sleep or eat. No matter how many you kill there will always be more. Sure, the vampire may be super strong and super fast and super smart, but you kill it and you're done. Zombies are numberless, and every one of you that dies makes a new zombie.

Now, in zombie movies, at least good zombie movies, the zombies mean little. They are an environmental hazard, like a hurricane or a volcano. The zombies serve only as a stress to bring out the humanity of the characters. And to show humanity's essential flaws (in the classic Romero case), because when people die in good zombie movies it's very rarely because of direct action of the zombies. People die because someone farked up. Someone was too arrogant. Someone started fighting with another survivor over bullshiat. Zombies are merely there to provide the stress to lead to the farkup and the gory aftermath. The survivors are the real threat to each other, not the zombies.

/Zombieland kind of turns around the classic Romero point.

 
sjsharkfan67 2009-11-04 12:43:07 AM  
fad?? really.. been going on for over 20 years.. and a godzilla movie competently written? two words. matthew broderick.. epic fail movie

 
M0nkeyp0x 2009-11-04 12:43:37 AM  
Well the original Godzilla movies had to be written well, to make up for the lack of special effects. Now-a-days we can simply CGI the hell out of everything and make it sweet (not the slot, but enough scenes to make it worth while)

For example, the movie Swordfish, only 2 good parts, the beginning where shiat gets blown up, and well, the boobies.

 
The English Major [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 12:45:03 AM  
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Until zombies get their own crudely animated Saturday morning cartoon series a la The Godzilla Power Hour, I'm going to say no.

Godzooky versus Zombooky.

WWJJD? (What Would Jet Jaguar Do?)

/not subby

 
TheLopper 2009-11-04 12:45:24 AM  
I love zombie movies. Even bad ones. There's something about end of the world scenarios that gets my blood pumping.

 
Tourney3p0 2009-11-04 12:45:27 AM  
Critch: Seriously, aren't they only popular in a "Rocky Horror" sense, just fun to watch and make fun of?

All the stuff being passed off as zombie movies for the last few years, sure. But in general, no.

Not that they're serious business, but they're not "Rocky Horror" type movies either.

 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 12:47:13 AM  
Some Godzilla movies require a WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLE crapload of time for Godzilla to *actually* show up.

I remember falling asleep after renting one of the new movies where he fights Mechagodzilla.

Seriously.

It was so frogdamn boring that it conked me right the hell out.

Never had that problem with a zombie movie.

 
M0nkeyp0x 2009-11-04 12:47:41 AM  
TheLopper: I love zombie movies. Even bad ones. There's something about end of the world scenarios that gets my blood pumping.

amen Brother.

28 days later, is like my favorite nightmare.

 
RemyDuron 2009-11-04 12:48:10 AM  
Critch: I'll take Shaun of the Dead and Zombieland over any of the Godzilla movies. Seriously, aren't they only popular in a "Rocky Horror" sense, just fun to watch and make fun of?

Eh, it depends. Most of the "Godzilla vs. *Blank*", yes. They are fun and bad. But the original Godzilla, through its crappy special effects, had a point. Although the "Nukes are bad" message may seem cliche today, you have to realize how much that meant to post war Japan. The bombing is an incredibly influential event, a HUGE amount of modern Japanese pop culture can be traced back to it. Monsters, super powers which threaten the world, human hubris leading to destruction, the post apocalyptic setting. . .

Godzilla is about how man causes it's own problems with horrific weapons then seeks to solve them with even more horrific weapons (the oxygen destroyer). Godzilla is nature's revenge for our hubris, and a metaphor for nuclear weapons, a beast of unimaginable power that cannot be put down once it has been awakened. Sure, it turns out they were kind of wrong (no one else has been nuked), but I imagine it was pretty goddamn powerful in Japan at the time it was released.

/History shows again and again how nature points out the folly of man. . .
//Also inspired a badass song from Blue Oyster Cult.

 
RemyDuron 2009-11-04 12:50:25 AM  
Tourney3p0: Critch: Seriously, aren't they only popular in a "Rocky Horror" sense, just fun to watch and make fun of?

All the stuff being passed off as zombie movies for the last few years, sure. But in general, no.

Not that they're serious business, but they're not "Rocky Horror" type movies either.


Uh, Zombieland, Shaun of the Dead, and 28 Days are all pretty goddamn good. Dawn of the Dead remake wasn't bad. Are there any really good zombie movies between the original Dawn and "modern" zombie films?

Evil Dead is pretty good, but I'd not call the deadites zombies. They look like zombies but act totally different.

 
Fano 2009-11-04 12:51:43 AM  
RemyDuron: Zombies are simple. Zombies are both our fear of "the masses" (all those people who aren't us and are thus idiots who don't know anything) and our fear of disease. There will always be others and always be disease and they will never, ever stop. That's the psychological fear, IMO. The practical fear is that the zombies outnumber you and can outlast you. They will wear you down and kill you because they do not have to sleep or eat. No matter how many you kill there will always be more. Sure, the vampire may be super strong and super fast and super smart, but you kill it and you're done. Zombies are numberless, and every one of you that dies makes a new zombie.

Now, in zombie movies, at least good zombie movies, the zombies mean little. They are an environmental hazard, like a hurricane or a volcano. The zombies serve only as a stress to bring out the humanity of the characters. And to show humanity's essential flaws (in the classic Romero case), because when people die in good zombie movies it's very rarely because of direct action of the zombies. People die because someone farked up. Someone was too arrogant. Someone started fighting with another survivor over bullshiat. Zombies are merely there to provide the stress to lead to the farkup and the gory aftermath. The survivors are the real threat to each other, not the zombies.

/Zombieland kind of turns around the classic Romero point.


This is pretty much the definitive description of zombie movies, and yet another reason I have you on favorites.

 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 12:51:44 AM  
The English Major: Godzooky versus Zombooky.

Hah!


WWJJD? (What Would Jet Jaguar Do?)

I remember laughing so hard at that the first time I saw that.

CLASSIC MST3K episode, skits AND theater segments.


But we can't forget about MST3K's classic zombie entries: Zombie Nightmare (voodoo zombies rather than flesh-eating zombies, but still) and The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies (who didn't really show up until the end, but with a title like that and the guy who was responsible for Eegah, I'm-a let that slide).

 
Tourney3p0 2009-11-04 12:55:38 AM  
RemyDuron:
Evil Dead is pretty good, but I'd not call the deadites zombies. They look like zombies but act totally different.


Never said they weren't.

No point in responding to the rest of your points, given that you started your post with "Uh.." like a retard, and counterpointed a point I didn't even hint at making.

 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 12:58:09 AM  
RemyDuron: Evil Dead is pretty good, but I'd not call the deadites zombies. They look like zombies but act totally different.

The Deadites fall into the realm of demonology/the-demonically-possessed.

Not zombies.

 
Brodan [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 12:58:15 AM  
Send... more... paramedics.

 
RemyDuron 2009-11-04 01:00:28 AM  
Tourney3p0: Never said they weren't.

No point in responding to the rest of your points, given that you started your post with "Uh.." like a retard, and counterpointed a point I didn't even hint at making.


. . .

Okay. It's called a "tangent." I was trying to think of good zombie movies between the original Dawn and the modern spate of zombie movies. I could not think of any.

/fark you too.

 
RemyDuron 2009-11-04 01:03:03 AM  
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: RemyDuron: Evil Dead is pretty good, but I'd not call the deadites zombies. They look like zombies but act totally different.

The Deadites fall into the realm of demonology/the-demonically-possessed.

Not zombies.


Well, demonic possession could be an explanation for zombies. But the deadites just don't act like them.

/I watched all three Evil Dead movies over the weekend, they are somewhat on my mind.

 
The English Major [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 01:04:07 AM  
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: The English Major: Godzooky versus Zombooky.

Hah!


WWJJD? (What Would Jet Jaguar Do?)

I remember laughing so hard at that the first time I saw that.

CLASSIC MST3K episode, skits AND theater segments.


But we can't forget about MST3K's classic zombie entries: Zombie Nightmare (voodoo zombies rather than flesh-eating zombies, but still) and The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies (who didn't really show up until the end, but with a title like that and the guy who was responsible for Eegah, I'm-a let that slide).


The best part about Volume XV is Zombie Nightmare. "Hank Peters, Italian grocer."
"I think I'll call Burt Ward, I know HE's not busy."

I finally, finally watched TISCWSLBMUZ for the first time yesterday after owning the set for years. Here's a best of compilation for it.

/glad I got Volume 10 before they yanked Godzilla Versus Megalon

 
Gangway Fathead 2009-11-04 01:05:16 AM  
RemyDuron: Are there any really good zombie movies between the original Dawn and "modern" zombie films?



Return of the Living Dead rocks.

-----
Americans like zombie movies because we all think we're the only one in the world who isn't an idiot. The desire to shoot up a bunch of brain dead dopes is primal, as anyone who's ever sat in Los Angeles traffic knows.

It's not braaaaaaaaaaain surgery to figure out.

 
braedan 2009-11-04 01:10:22 AM  
RemyDuron explained it all quite well. Nothing more to say except.

profile.ak.fbcdn.net
Does not approve of Subby.

 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 01:14:59 AM  
The English Major: The best part about Volume XV is Zombie Nightmare. "Hank Peters, Italian grocer."
"I think I'll call Burt Ward, I know HE's not busy."


Fun box set all the way around.

But Zombie Nightmare is the SHIAT.

"John Goodman on Hume Cronyn's back could outrun this guy!"


I finally, finally watched TISCWSLBMUZ for the first time yesterday after owning the set for years.

Top-of-the-line stuff, that.

To think that Incredibly Strange Creatures came out right before Jack Frost... they were at the top of their game around that time...


/glad I got Volume 10 before they yanked Godzilla Versus Megalon

When that was released, I had a hunch that it was gonna be discontinued rather quickly, given Best Brains' rocky relationship with Sandy Frank.

The smart folks are the ones who snapped them up and sold them on eBay for a tidy profit.


RemyDuron: But the deadites just don't act like them.

Gotcha. I dig, I follow.


I watched all three Evil Dead movies over the weekend, they are somewhat on my mind.

Hey, as it should be, man.

 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 01:16:01 AM  
braedan: RemyDuron explained it all quite well.

This too.

Excellent post towards the top there, Remy.

 
Swampthing in Korea 2009-11-04 01:19:18 AM  
GoteamVenture: i dont know if zombies are a response to "americans fear of over whelming technology." thats a bit of a stretch. i think in these modern times the zombie is a face for the mindless anonymity that the internet gives to people. So there is a tech connection. Or the soulless that corporate culture is breeding in the states today.

No, zombies are a face for things that want to EAT YOU.

That and they make a great mechanism for survivalist fantasy

 
buckeyebrain 2009-11-04 01:20:17 AM  
I read where PETA is going to make a movie about vegetarian zombies.

They go after GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS!

 
Birnone 2009-11-04 01:22:43 AM  
The article starts off by dismissing Romero's first effort- the effort that created the modern zombie mythology. That's a massive fail if I ever saw one.

The funny thing is I think they dismiss it because it doesn't fit into their theory about the fear of technology going awry(the 60s had no technology of course), but it does! The zombies are caused by the Venus probe, it's Godzilla and the atomic testing all over again.

 
Fano 2009-11-04 01:23:49 AM  
buckeyebrain: I read where PETA is going to make a movie about vegetarian zombies.

They go after GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS!


But what about the plumbing zombies?

They go after DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS!

 
Swampthing in Korea 2009-11-04 01:23:54 AM  
Fano: RemyDuron: Zombies are simple. Zombies are both our fear of "the masses" (all those people who aren't us and are thus idiots who don't know anything) and our fear of disease. There will always be others and always be disease and they will never, ever stop. That's the psychological fear, IMO. The practical fear is that the zombies outnumber you and can outlast you. They will wear you down and kill you because they do not have to sleep or eat. No matter how many you kill there will always be more. Sure, the vampire may be super strong and super fast and super smart, but you kill it and you're done. Zombies are numberless, and every one of you that dies makes a new zombie.

Now, in zombie movies, at least good zombie movies, the zombies mean little. They are an environmental hazard, like a hurricane or a volcano. The zombies serve only as a stress to bring out the humanity of the characters. And to show humanity's essential flaws (in the classic Romero case), because when people die in good zombie movies it's very rarely because of direct action of the zombies. People die because someone farked up. Someone was too arrogant. Someone started fighting with another survivor over bullshiat. Zombies are merely there to provide the stress to lead to the farkup and the gory aftermath. The survivors are the real threat to each other, not the zombies.

/Zombieland kind of turns around the classic Romero point.

This is pretty much the definitive description of zombie movies, and yet another reason I have you on favorites.


I don't think the zombies can outlast you.

Perpetual movement will gradually ruin their muscles, since they are not alive they cannot heal them, meaning they will soon become immobolized.

/Thank you, Max Brooks.

 
Fano 2009-11-04 01:26:08 AM  
Gangway Fathead: RemyDuron: Are there any really good zombie movies between the original Dawn and "modern" zombie films?



Return of the Living Dead rocks.

-----
Americans like zombie movies because we all think we're the only one in the world who isn't an idiot. The desire to shoot up a bunch of brain dead dopes is primal, as anyone who's ever sat in Los Angeles traffic knows.
It's not braaaaaaaaaaain surgery to figure out.


Combined with RemyDuron's post, this explains the appeal of zombie movies.

 
Oddjorb 2009-11-04 01:28:17 AM  
GoteamVenture: i dont know if zombies are a response to "americans fear of over whelming technology." thats a bit of a stretch. i think in these modern times the zombie is a face for the mindless anonymity that the internet gives to people. So there is a tech connection. Or the soulless that corporate culture is breeding in the states today.

Zombies are the face that are going to eat my face.

 
Japancakes [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 01:57:18 AM  
buckeyebrain: I read where PETA is going to make a movie about vegetarian zombies.

Not by PETA, but it HAS been done on film. And no I'm not going to tell FARK where (again) because I've decided in the interim between the last time and now that I don't want the makers of that piece o' aural-visual tripe earning any remuneration off of the curious I might send their way. I'm saving you the pain that I didn't spare myself by not viewing it.

But belieeeeeeeeeeeeve me, that concept's been actualized on film.

 
TehBullfrog 2009-11-04 03:21:06 AM  
i185.photobucket.com

 
Iron Chef Scottish 2009-11-04 03:30:14 AM  
Max Brooks cannot write for sh*t, and his books suck fetid donkey nob.
That's my contribution to this thread.

 
Deece 2009-11-04 04:02:24 AM  
subby: most Godzilla movies were competently written

Really?

How hard is it to come up with "Is Gozirra! Evelybody free!"

 
Japancakes [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 04:32:46 AM  
RemyDuron: Tourney3p0: Critch: Seriously, aren't they only popular in a "Rocky Horror" sense, just fun to watch and make fun of?

All the stuff being passed off as zombie movies for the last few years, sure. But in general, no.

Not that they're serious business, but they're not "Rocky Horror" type movies either.

Uh, Zombieland, Shaun of the Dead, and 28 Days are all pretty goddamn good. Dawn of the Dead remake wasn't bad. Are there any really good zombie movies between the original Dawn and "modern" zombie films?


1. "Versus" [2000]
2. "Wild Zero" [2000]
3. "The Happiness of the Katakuris" [2001]
4. "Stacy" [2001]
5. "Shiryô-gari (Junk)" [2000]
6. "Bio-Cops" (2000)
7. "Sex, Chocolate, and Zombie Republicans" [1998]
8. "I, Zombie: A Chronicle of Pain" [1998]
9. "Bio-Zombie" [1998]
10. "Shatter Dead" [1994]
11. "Dellamorte Dellamore" [1994]
12. "Return of the Living Dead, Part III" [1993]
13. "Bride of Re-Animator" [1990]
14. "Night Life" [1989]
15. "The Serpent and the Rainbow" [1988]
16. "The Dead Next Door" [1988]
17. "Mr. Vampire" [1985]
18. "Re-Animator" [1985]
19. "Death Warmed Up" [1985]
20. "Day of the Dead" [1985]
21. "Zeder" [1983]
22. "Erotic Orgasm" [1982]
23. "The House by the Cemetery" [1981]
24. "Dead & Buried" [1981]
25. "The Beyond" [1981]
26. "Burial Ground" [1981]
27. "Dawn of the Mummy" [1981]
28. "Nightmare City" [1980]
29. "City of the Living Dead" [1980]
30. "The Grapes of Death" [1978]
31. "Zombie" [1979]
32. "Night of the Creeps" (1986)
33. "Undead" [2003)
34. "Zombie Honeymoon" (2004)
35. "Choking Hazard" (2004)
36. "Tokyo Zombie (2005)
37. "Zonbi jieitai (Nihombie 1)" (2006)
38. "The Zombie Diaries" (2006)
39. "Last Rites of the Dead" [2006]
40. "Zibahkhana (Hell's Ground)" (2007)
41. "Joshikyôei hanrangun" ("Attack Girls Swim Team vs the Unliving Dead (2007)
42. "High School Girl Rika: Zombie Hunter" (2008)
43. "Pontypool" (2008)


Also: I consider the antagonists of Carpenter's "The Fog" (1980) to be "zombie-esque". I'm probably alone in that even if I'm not alone in thinking it's a great film.

As always, there exists the very real probability that your definition of "good" and my definition of "good" will not overlap perfectly. I take responsibility for no one's opinions but my own.

 
Your Faith is Creepy [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 04:42:20 AM  
can't believe I'm first to say no, duh, King Kong is America's Godzilla, to the extent we have one. Except in our case, the national nightmare isn't the destructive power of energies man should never have unleashed, but the big black peni gorilla, from the deepest jungles of darkest blah blah blah.

/same as it ever was

 
Galkaflower 2009-11-04 04:48:30 AM  
Don't forget Dod Sno.

Nazi Zombies!

 
Japancakes [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 05:08:48 AM  
Galkaflower: Don't forget Dod Sno.

Nazi Zombies!


That one keeps slipping through the cracks of my mind. Thanks for the freshest reminder. I'll see if I can get it through the interlibrary loan tomorrow.

I also greatly enjoyed "Shock Waves" (new window) from 1977 with Peter Cushing. It also features nazi revenants.


Oh and Gojira (1954) is really the only Godzilla film you'll ever need to view. The original Japanese cut (not the re-edited to hell and back Raymond Burr-starring English-language version).

and this is coming from someone who has viewed all of the films that followed.

 
LewDux 2009-11-04 07:23:44 AM  

 
syberpud 2009-11-04 07:51:02 AM  
Japancakes: RemyDuron: Tourney3p0: Critch: Seriously, aren't they only popular in a "Rocky Horror" sense, just fun to watch and make fun of?

All the stuff being passed off as zombie movies for the last few years, sure. But in general, no.

Not that they're serious business, but they're not "Rocky Horror" type movies either.

Uh, Zombieland, Shaun of the Dead, and 28 Days are all pretty goddamn good. Dawn of the Dead remake wasn't bad. Are there any really good zombie movies between the original Dawn and "modern" zombie films?

20. "Day of the Dead" [1985]
21. "Zeder" [1983]
22. "Erotic Orgasm" [1982]
23. "The House by the Cemetery" [1981]


I think I missed that one. Sounds like the stiffs were in the audience!

/here all week.

 
Zer0ne 2009-11-04 08:12:14 AM  
io9 suffers from the same thing most blogs do -- they have to write something even when they have nothing worth writing.

/dn need to rtfa

 
dragon927 2009-11-04 08:29:27 AM  
History shows again and again how nature points out the folly of man.

 
whizbangthedirtfarmer 2009-11-04 09:49:14 AM  
I kinda thought that the new Godzilla/Mechagodzilla movies were actually not so bad.

/also, the one where Godzilla was evil again and represented the souls of the Japanese war dead

 
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