If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
Fark SearchWeb Fark

         more options... Create account

(Wired) Interesting Scent of fear keeps male bed bugs from "traumatic insemination" of other males. You'll click for the bedbug porn   (wired.com) divider line 43
More: Interesting, bed bugs, mating, entomologists, sperm, ecologists, rabbits, pheromones, pests  
•       •       •

2693 clicks; posted to Geek » on 03 Nov 2009 at 1:24 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

43 Comments   (+0 »)


 
Treygreen13 2009-11-03 01:25:49 PM  
No, I won't.

 
The Angry Hand of God 2009-11-03 01:30:32 PM  
Traumatic insemination...Is there really any other way? Sounds like a creampie surprise to me.

 
Kate Gosselin's Pap Smear 2009-11-03 01:31:07 PM  
i lol'd

 
Rickerkioz [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 01:35:04 PM  
The worst month of my life was when I discovered my house had bedbugs.

Anything that furthers science's knowledge on how to destroy these foul creatures is OK in my book.

 
NaziKamikaze 2009-11-03 01:42:13 PM  
Rickerkioz: The worst month of my life was when I discovered my house had bedbugs.

Anything that furthers science's knowledge on how to destroy these foul creatures is OK in my book.


There is a rash of them globally. I've never heard of anyone I know having them, and have never seen them in person. Then one night I was up late and bam...I've got them. Really farking creepy things.

I think I got rid of them and they didn't infest the house, but I found out they came from a roommate's box springs months after I discovered them and a year after I lived her. In a completely different house.

 
Jubeebee 2009-11-03 01:51:21 PM  
www.wired.com

You gonna get traumatically inseminated.

 
burndtdan 2009-11-03 02:08:37 PM  
funny, it's the scent of fear that drives me into a "traumatic insemination" frenzy.

 
bugmn99 2009-11-03 02:11:49 PM  
I discovered a stinkbug up my pant leg when I arrived at work this morning so my co-workers were really getting a kick out of me punching myself up and down the leg/damn near ripping my pants off.

/sorry for the threadjack.
//just needed to talk to someone about it
///DIEDIEDIEDIE-wap-wap-wap-wap

 
Saberus Terras 2009-11-03 02:14:01 PM  
So could we kill off a population by spraying the area in a synthesized version of this stuff? Death of the population by no reproduction.

/Like why we don't date robots?
//better not be obscure
///Not funny is OK

 
NittLion78 2009-11-03 02:15:10 PM  
i29.tinypic.com

 
E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease 2009-11-03 02:17:15 PM  
DDT kills these suckers, but the ENVIRO-NAZIS had it banned!
Just because it was wiping out all the raptors! Jeez

 
FunkOut [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 02:22:10 PM  
E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease: DDT kills these suckers, but the ENVIRO-NAZIS had it banned!
Just because it was wiping out all the raptors! Jeez


I thought a comet wiped out the velociraptors.

 
fluffy2097 2009-11-03 02:31:10 PM  
Rickerkioz: The worst month of my life was when I discovered my house had bedbugs.

Anything that furthers science's knowledge on how to destroy these foul creatures is OK in my book.


My apartment is still infested with the little monsters even after months of treatments.

We HAVE a way to destroy the blood sucking monsters. It's called DDT. To hell with falcon eggs, I want a pest free home

 
DasRaven 2009-11-03 02:46:30 PM  
"Rule 34 - No Exceptions"

 
archichris [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 03:07:10 PM  
There is a smell, its not plesant.

If your poor, don't garbage pick, get a foam rubber mattress and strip the fabric cover off, put that on a mattress size piece of plywood up on cement blocks. No couches or easy chairs, use plastic stack-able chairs. Don't have clutter, its not worth it, just have nice neat stacks of whatever tote you can find with your clothes in it.

If you get bugs, launder your sheets, and inspect the surface of the mattress, the plywood, and the cement blocks for bugs, spray them with rubbing alcohol. If they are coming from someplace other than the bed platform, apply a line of Vaseline to the underside of the plywood deck and renew it every time it dries or drips off.

Its going to take the politicians years to legalize something that will wipe out bed bugs again. Till then everyone thinks we can afford $200 a month for exterminator visits. Just sit tight until they announce the bugs are gone then start to rebuild your collections of crap.

 
Hyaku-Shiki 2009-11-03 03:31:56 PM  
E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease: DDT kills these suckers, but the ENVIRO-NAZIS had it banned!

1. They're immune to it because they've developed resistance.
2. It's bad for the environment.

 
gshepnyc 2009-11-03 03:34:43 PM  
fluffy2097: Rickerkioz: The worst month of my life was when I discovered my house had bedbugs.

Anything that furthers science's knowledge on how to destroy these foul creatures is OK in my book.

My apartment is still infested with the little monsters even after months of treatments.

We HAVE a way to destroy the blood sucking monsters. It's called DDT. To hell with falcon eggs, I want a pest free home


THIS. I am fortunate not to have had them but other apartments in my building have and I have co-workers who have. People just about go broke dealing with this plus it takes a mental toll, too, because of knowing that you go to sleep just to be covered in bugs.

The book "Silent Spring" was pretty much single-handedly responsible for this and yet it remains highly questionable. So we all suffer so some granola eating tree hugger can feel like a hero. Stop listening to the hippies.

 
fluffy2097 2009-11-03 04:04:51 PM  
gshepnyc:

THIS. I am fortunate not to have had them but other apartments in my building have and I have co-workers who have. People just about go broke dealing with this plus it takes a mental toll, too, because of knowing that you go to sleep just to be covered in bugs.


Living in a home infested with bed bugs is like a meth nightmare. You start feeling them crawling all over your body even when they aren't there.

 
Goodfella 2009-11-03 04:07:20 PM  
Calling on Rule 34 for this puppy...

 
Unixfreak [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 04:14:22 PM  
gshepnyc: Stop listening to the hippies.

But if everyone did that, they'd have to get jobs.

 
gshepnyc 2009-11-03 04:34:55 PM  
fluffy2097: gshepnyc:

THIS. I am fortunate not to have had them but other apartments in my building have and I have co-workers who have. People just about go broke dealing with this plus it takes a mental toll, too, because of knowing that you go to sleep just to be covered in bugs.


Living in a home infested with bed bugs is like a meth nightmare. You start feeling them crawling all over your body even when they aren't there.


Well do whatever it takes to maintain your sanity. I have heard of people having breakdowns over this. Keep telling yourself that our great grandparents dealt with it and were ok. I'm not trying to make light of it. God knows I'd be out of my mind and would want someone to try to put it into perspective for me.

Best of luck to you.

 
Elroyone 2009-11-03 04:52:39 PM  
Okay, where's Elsinore?

 
4chan 2009-11-03 05:08:47 PM  
FunkOut: E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease: DDT kills these suckers, but the ENVIRO-NAZIS had it banned!
Just because it was wiping out all the raptors! Jeez

I thought a comet wiped out the velociraptors.


I think comet wipes out stains

 
fluffy2097 2009-11-03 05:32:33 PM  
gshepnyc:

Well do whatever it takes to maintain your sanity. I have heard of people having breakdowns over this. Keep telling yourself that our great grandparents dealt with it and were ok. I'm not trying to make light of it. God knows I'd be out of my mind and would want someone to try to put it into perspective for me.

Best of luck to you.


Thankfully My management company has been great at getting the pest guy to come out on a weekly basis to spray. I rarely see them anymore, but every few days I pick another one off the wall and crush it. They can only spray piretherin apparently, which will kill on contact, but it breaks down into harmless byproducts when exposed to sunlight, making it unsuitable for creating a kill barrier. With this stuff, the best hope you have is to spray over and over, hoping that you get a few drops of the stuff on every single last bug in your house, including the ones under the carpet and in the walls.

On the hippy bullshiat side, Peppermint oil kills them on contact as well, and smells a fair bit nicer.

 
Kymry 2009-11-03 05:33:17 PM  
I have heard of people having breakdowns over this.

I almost did. I seriously almost did. It was farking horrible. The bites swelled up to the size of golf balls, and I would get bit on my face, hands, feet--I had no way to hide those bites, and people started to stare. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't visit my friends, or hug people for fear I'd spread the bastards (I probably brought them home from public school on my coat. The school refused to spray our cluttered classroom despite half the class having the bugs and parents complaining).

I had a tiny apartment, so clutter was unavoidable. It was old, so there were a bajillion places for them to hide. The exterminator had to come three times and I spent hundreds of extra dollars on laundry, mattress covers, cleaning products, etc.

Not to mention, I couldn't sleep.

Finally I started drenching myself in Deep Woods Off.

If you can stand the smell, ignore the directions on the bottle. Apply it everywhere. Don't forget your face and the back of your ears and neck (I forgot that one time and I looked like Frankenstein for two weeks). It's literally the only thing that saved my sanity till they were finally gone.

 
NaziKamikaze 2009-11-03 06:42:01 PM  
I thankfully only had them on my bed and nowhere else, and don't have an allergic reaction to their bites. But it did creep me out the first few nights, especially when they were everywhere without notice.

But what's this crap talking about spraying DDT to get rid of bedbugs? Are you that farking stupid. Are you going to drench your mattress, bed frame, walls, floor, and other furniture in that shiat? Go ahead, be a moron, especially if you have pets or kids.

 
ChaoticLimbs 2009-11-03 07:27:00 PM  
I got accused of traumatic insemination once. I was drunk, she passed out in an armchair with her mouth open. Who knew something that obscure would already be illegal?

I mean, c'mon, it was just a PRANK!

 
AmazingRuss 2009-11-03 07:43:55 PM  
NaziKamikaze: But what's this crap talking about spraying DDT to get rid of bedbugs? Are you that farking stupid. Are you going to drench your mattress, bed frame, walls, floor, and other furniture in that shiat? Go ahead, be a moron, especially if you have pets or kids.

DDT is harmless for anyone that doesn't plan to live past 50.

 
buckler 2009-11-03 07:56:25 PM  
Bedbugs can suck my dick. I think they already have, or at least sucked the blood out of it. I had my first encounter with the little bastards about six months ago, when I started noticing little bloodstains on my sheets. At first, I didn't think much of it, but then I started noticing groups of itchy welts all over my body. I woke up one night to discover the farkers actually on my body and sucking the life juices out of me. I pinched dead the ones I could find, resulting in a pop of blood with each one. The next day, I bought a bug bomb, deconstructed my bed and set it off, to no effect. I then went to my apartment management and complained. They dispatched an exterminator team that did something really horrible to them, and who covered my mattress and box spring with impenetrable covers. Although I had to do fifteen loads of laundry that day, and vacuum the hell out of my place, it worked. Haven't seen nary a one since then, and I like it that way. They can be scared of farking each other all they like. I'd rather they be scared of me.

 
ShawnDoc [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 07:56:27 PM  
NaziKamikaze:
But what's this crap talking about spraying DDT to get rid of bedbugs? Are you that farking stupid. Are you going to drench your mattress, bed frame, walls, floor, and other furniture in that shiat? Go ahead, be a moron, especially if you have pets or kids.


Um, DDT is the only effective way to kill the suckers, and it used to be used all the time for it. The resurgence of bed bugs is due in part to DDT being off the market.

 
buckler 2009-11-03 08:41:48 PM  
ShawnDoc: NaziKamikaze:
But what's this crap talking about spraying DDT to get rid of bedbugs? Are you that farking stupid. Are you going to drench your mattress, bed frame, walls, floor, and other furniture in that shiat? Go ahead, be a moron, especially if you have pets or kids.

Um, DDT is the only effective way to kill the suckers, and it used to be used all the time for it. The resurgence of bed bugs is due in part to DDT being off the market.


DDT works its way up the food chain. I'd rather not have it in the stuff I eat.

 
fluffy2097 2009-11-03 08:44:42 PM  
buckler:

DDT works its way up the food chain. I'd rather not have it in the stuff I eat.


I'm not planning on eating my bedroom carpet. If you are planning on eating your bedroom carpet, you have bigger issues to deal with then bed bugs.

 
fizzix_is_fun 2009-11-03 08:51:51 PM  
A trick I heard which might work. Get a new bed, one that stands on posts. A full metal frame is preferred. Make sure it is away from any walls. Put a bucket under each leg of the bed and fill it with mineral water. Never let sheets touch the ground or walls. Refill the buckets when the drain.

bedbugs suck. And they're everywhere these days. They're taking a huge toll on the hotel industry.

 
buckler 2009-11-03 08:52:57 PM  
fluffy2097: buckler:

DDT works its way up the food chain. I'd rather not have it in the stuff I eat.

I'm not planning on eating my bedroom carpet. If you are planning on eating your bedroom carpet, you have bigger issues to deal with then bed bugs.


Spray the bugs with DDT. The bugs become resistant. Larger animals eat the bugs, and larger animals eat those animals. The DDT gets more concentrated at every step. Eventually, we get to the point where we're eating the animals that ate the animals that ate the animals that ate the animals that we sprayed with DDT. It's a farking bad chemical that doesn't belong in the food chain.

 
Taima [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 10:18:17 PM  
Can we have a nice spider thread instead? You people are freakin me out.

/Likes spiders.

 
Quantum Apostrophe 2009-11-03 11:10:09 PM  
buckler: Larger animals eat the bugs,

Fine, so which animal eats bedbugs? Something like a house centipede? Breed the farkers to eat bedbugs in houses and you'll be rich!

 
Catsmeow 2009-11-03 11:46:28 PM  
The only time I have ever seen a bedbug was at the laundromat we went to when our washing machine was broken. I don't know how we escaped bringing them home.

The laundromat was filthy and--NEVER AGAIN. I will hand wash stuff before I take that risk again.

 
fluffy2097 2009-11-04 12:35:11 AM  
fizzix_is_fun: A trick I heard which might work. Get a new bed, one that stands on posts. A full metal frame is preferred. Make sure it is away from any walls. Put a bucket under each leg of the bed and fill it with mineral water. Never let sheets touch the ground or walls. Refill the buckets when the drain.


Bed bugs climb the walls and onto the ceilings, then drop onto you from above. making a moat ain't gonna do shiat.

 
GoshAwful 2009-11-04 03:19:44 AM  
buckler: fluffy2097: buckler:

DDT works its way up the food chain. I'd rather not have it in the stuff I eat.

I'm not planning on eating my bedroom carpet. If you are planning on eating your bedroom carpet, you have bigger issues to deal with then bed bugs.

Spray the bugs with DDT. The bugs become resistant. Larger animals eat the bugs, and larger animals eat those animals. The DDT gets more concentrated at every step. Eventually, we get to the point where we're eating the animals that ate the animals that ate the animals that ate the animals that we sprayed with DDT. It's a farking bad chemical that doesn't belong in the food chain.



Well, technically, I don't think the cows and chickens I feast on are the top animals in the food chain centered around your bedroom ecosystem, but otherwise spot on!

 
NaziKamikaze 2009-11-04 10:11:51 AM  
ShawnDoc: NaziKamikaze:
But what's this crap talking about spraying DDT to get rid of bedbugs? Are you that farking stupid. Are you going to drench your mattress, bed frame, walls, floor, and other furniture in that shiat? Go ahead, be a moron, especially if you have pets or kids.

Um, DDT is the only effective way to kill the suckers, and it used to be used all the time for it. The resurgence of bed bugs is due in part to DDT being off the market.


Be that as it may, you still aren't addressing my concern of your/your kids'/your pets' health.

Rubbing alcohol works just the same, BTW.

 
Feepit [TotalFark] 2009-11-04 10:56:22 AM  
I see some Farkers believe DDT is the only thing that works against bedbugs, while others disagree. I shall divide these camps into creationists and evolutionists and suggest one camp do their research.

 
Jae0o0 2009-11-04 02:23:55 PM  
I think i'd rather deal with roaches. I've never encountered a begdug but, but if I did, i'd probably set my house on fire and then jump in a big vat of acid.

 
PopeSchmope 2009-11-06 04:40:28 AM  
bugmn99: I discovered a stinkbug up my pant leg when I arrived at work this morning so my co-workers were really getting a kick out of me punching myself up and down the leg/damn near ripping my pants off.

/sorry for the threadjack.
//just needed to talk to someone about it
///DIEDIEDIEDIE-wap-wap-wap-wap


Can you feel one crawling up your leg right now? I mean, you can just barely feel it, but it's there, crawling, crawling...

 
Displayed 43 of 43 comments


[Continue Farking]