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(FilmDrunk) Stupid Disney's Prince of Persia reimagines ancient Persia as a land of spray-tanned white people with English accents   (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) divider line 165
More: Stupid, Prince, Prince of Persia, Persia, Disney, Jake Gyllenhaal, Nicholas Cage, English, english accents  
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vossiewulf [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 11:20:02 AM  
It could be worse.

img97.imageshack.us

 
Sybarite [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 11:24:10 AM  
You didn't figure that out when they cast one of the whitest guys in Hollywood as the lead? Hey, at least they got Kingsly who has played Persian before and can kinda sorta pass in the right light.

 
skitzo [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 11:38:32 AM  
The way God intended it.

 
mattharvest [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 11:46:25 AM  
Yeah, it sure is monstrous to have characters of the wrong ethnicity when portraying a fictional, magical version of Persia.

Eesh. This is over-sensitivity, folks.

 
FishyFred [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 11:54:02 AM  
Ben Kingsley is apparently an avid gamer. First BloodRayne, now this?

 
timujin [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 11:57:11 AM  
eh, it looked epic and cheesy both, much in the same way that Pirates of the Caribbean did.

As for the reviewer, I'm not really sure what his problem is. He's blaming plot points on Bruckheimer that were pulled straight from the video game this movie is based on. He complains about "English accents" when that's one of the most overused devices in film history. Did he complain that Caesar spoke with a British accent in HBO's Rome? And I had no trouble determining "which way is up".

Honestly, I half expected him to end with "The last good movie set in the desert was Casablanca, now get off my lawn!"

 
Sybarite [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:06:56 PM  
FishyFred: Ben Kingsley is apparently an avid gamer. First BloodRayne, now this?


Or maybe it's just the three ex-wives. Gandhi gots to get paid.

 
MaxxLarge [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:14:07 PM  
Sybarite: Hey, at least they got Kingsly who has played Persian before and can kinda sorta pass in the right light.

Ben Kingsley's father was Indian. He was born "Krishna Bhanji."

Just sayin'.

 
NaturalDrunkenPungence 2009-11-03 12:33:13 PM  
This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

 
FunkOut [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:36:28 PM  
MaxxLarge: Sybarite: Hey, at least they got Kingsly who has played Persian before and can kinda sorta pass in the right light.

Ben Kingsley's father was Indian. He was born "Krishna Bhanji."

Just sayin'.


And here I thought his mother just ate too much vindaloo when she was pregnant.

 
bungle_jr 2009-11-03 12:38:23 PM  
Disney's Prince of Persia Aladdin reimagined ancient Persia (fictional) Agrabah as a land of spray-tanned white people with English American accents

 
Abracapocalypse 2009-11-03 12:38:47 PM  
NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

The funny thing is the words "Iran" and "Ireland" are actually from the same root word "Arya" which is where they got Aryan from. It's proto-sanskrit for Noble. It was the same people group that moved out of Northern India and some went to where Persia was and the rest drifted over into Europe and became Celtic and Germanic peoples.

Most Iranians could shave off their beard and look like a European banker.

*Note, despite my use of the word "Aryan" this is not some racist screed but the actual research anthropologists have done. It's not my fault the white-power movement has co-opted the word.

 
Gunther 2009-11-03 12:39:30 PM  
Y'know, usually I'm one of the assholes deriding the lack of subtlety and over-prevailence of action, explosions and one-liners in modern cinema, but that actually looked pretty fun in a "Pirates of the Caribbean" way (the first one, not the crappy sequels).

The fact that I loved the game possibly has something to do with it.

FishyFred: Ben Kingsley is apparently an avid gamer. First BloodRayne, now this?

I vaguely remember him saying in an interview that he did Bloodrayne because he always wanted to play a vampire, but had never been offered a part as one before.

 
pd771 [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:39:37 PM  
NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

correct. In fact, Xenophon described ancient Persians as whiter than his own Greek troops. There are also Persians with blue eyes. I found it very hilarious those who claimed casting him was racist. Most of those people wanted someone who had arabic features.

 
yllosubmarine 2009-11-03 12:39:54 PM  
Great, because Hollywood didn't piss off Persia/Iran enough with 300, now we have this? Yes, I know that 300 was based on an excellent graphic novel, just as this new film is based on a popular video game, but those over there seem to miss said important points of interest. At least all the butthurt will be fun, if not the film itself.

 
Celticweaver 2009-11-03 12:40:08 PM  
As long as someone makes a good video game movie, and bucks the trend that Uwe Boll started, then I say good on ya.

 
TimeWaste 2009-11-03 12:42:30 PM  
timujin: eh, it looked epic and cheesy both, much in the same way that Pirates of the Caribbean did.

As for the reviewer, I'm not really sure what his problem is. He's blaming plot points on Bruckheimer that were pulled straight from the video game this movie is based on. He complains about "English accents" when that's one of the most overused devices in film history. Did he complain that Caesar spoke with a British accent in HBO's Rome? And I had no trouble determining "which way is up".

Honestly, I half expected him to end with "The last good movie set in the desert was Casablanca, now get off my lawn!"



This.

I do not think the author is familiar with the game it is based on. He sounds like the character, who is capable of running on all sides of walls to obtain a dagger which controls time. So... the problem here? It is what it is. A popcorn flick.

I'll go see it.

 
CrankMyBlueSax 2009-11-03 12:42:45 PM  
Ancient Persia was largely populated by superstitious, smelly, barbarians. Much like today.

 
nicksteel 2009-11-03 12:42:47 PM  
yllosubmarine: Great, because Hollywood didn't piss off Persia/Iran enough with 300, now we have this? Yes, I know that 300 was based on an excellent graphic novel, just as this new film is based on a popular video game, but those over there seem to miss said important points of interest. At least all the butthurt will be fun, if not the film itself.

Everything we do pisses off the arab world.

 
GypsyJoker 2009-11-03 12:42:50 PM  
while Gemma Arterton whispers expository dialog in your ear like she wants to do you.

TFA says this like it's a bad thing.

 
militant guacamole 2009-11-03 12:43:05 PM  
timujin: Honestly, I half expected him to end with "The last good movie set in the desert was Casablanca, now get off my lawn!"

Well...It was.

l.yimg.com

/Get off my lawn...for old times sake.

 
t3knomanser 2009-11-03 12:43:20 PM  
NaturalDrunkenPungence: The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

Iran is named for the ethnicity of the majority group, a group also referred to as Persian. The root that Iran derives from is Aryan. Persians are white people.

Modern day Persians do tend towards a darker skin tone, mostly because they got their asses conquered by Arabs with regularity during the first millennium, common era.

Interestingly, Persians speak Farsi, which is actually an Arabic corruption of Persian. Arabic has no "P" sound, while Persian does. In the mouths of the Arab conquerors, "Parsi" became "Farsi".

Despite using similar alphabets, Farsi is not related to Arabic. It's in the Indo-European family of languages, while Arabic and Hebrew constitute the Semetic branch of languages. However, due to cultural cross pollination, Farsi borrows many words from Arabic. It also borrows heavily from French. In common usage, "Merci" is the appropriate way to say "thank you".

//Currently learning Farsi; my wife is half Persian.
//Where's Persepolis when you need him?

 
mistrmind 2009-11-03 12:44:06 PM  
Durka durka!

 
EsteeFlwrPot 2009-11-03 12:44:58 PM  
NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

If you dare say that to an actual Persian you'll get your ass kicked. Just saying.

Abracapocalypse: The funny thing is the words "Iran" and "Ireland" are actually from the same root word "Arya" which is where they got Aryan from.

I thought the root word of Ireland was Ire, meaning anger.

 
IdBeCrazyIf 2009-11-03 12:46:55 PM  
FishyFred: Ben Kingsley is apparently an avid gamer. First BloodRayne, now this?

Never mention that abomination of a film ever again.

I'm pretty there is a circle of hell dedicated to watching that movie.

 
t3knomanser 2009-11-03 12:47:04 PM  
CrankMyBlueSax: Ancient Persia was largely populated by superstitious, smelly, barbarians.

I'm sorry, you're confusing ancient Persia with ancient Europe. You're also confusing modern day Iran with Iraq. Modern day Iran is one of the most Westernized cultures in the region, ironic considering the reactionary nature of the government.

And in the era of Cyrus the Great, Persia was in a golden age on par with the height of the peak of the Hellenic era. Essentially, Greek and Persian culture borrowed heavily from each other.

And let's be frank: modern Christianity wouldn't exist without the influence of Zoroastrianism on Judaism.

 
drjekel_mrhyde 2009-11-03 12:47:47 PM  
Is this from the same group of people who think Jesus was a white(European)man

 
theorellior 2009-11-03 12:48:08 PM  
Didn't look too bad. At least it's Jerry Bruckheimer, who sometimes realizes you have to have a plot for assplosions to follow, unlike Michael Bay.

 
pd771 [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:50:21 PM  
EsteeFlwrPot: NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

If you dare say that to an actual Persian you'll get your ass kicked. Just saying.


You'd get your ass kicked for pointing out their origin. I'd think they'd be pissed if you thought they were all Arabic. I know that pissed off the Persian guy I knew.

EsteeFlwrPot: Abracapocalypse: The funny thing is the words "Iran" and "Ireland" are actually from the same root word "Arya" which is where they got Aryan from.

I thought the root word of Ireland was Ire, meaning anger.


You're both wrong. It came from the Gaelic word for the Patron Goddess of the country.

 
Fano 2009-11-03 12:51:00 PM  
pd771: NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

correct. In fact, Xenophon described ancient Persians as whiter than his own Greek troops. There are also Persians with blue eyes. I found it very hilarious those who claimed casting him was racist. Most of those people wanted someone who had arabic features.


True Persians look down on the donkey farkers that claim to be the face of the Middle East.

 
NaturalDrunkenPungence 2009-11-03 12:51:01 PM  
EsteeFlwrPot: NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

If you dare say that to an actual Persian you'll get your ass kicked. Just saying.

Abracapocalypse: The funny thing is the words "Iran" and "Ireland" are actually from the same root word "Arya" which is where they got Aryan from.

I thought the root word of Ireland was Ire, meaning anger.


Not so much, while some Iranians may get angry at that, most of them I've met have actually been proud of the fact that they were different from the rest of the muslim world, and some of them were actually pretty cocky about the fact that they were white. Especially the ones that call themselves Persian, because they don't at all agree with the Islamic Revolution, hence not calling themselves Iranian.

 
Fano 2009-11-03 12:51:52 PM  
Aladdin was a chinese boy, there, I said it.

 
Uzzah 2009-11-03 12:52:40 PM  
*And that this is also the plot of the video game it's based on doesn't make it any less of a stupid idea. It makes it even more of a stupid idea.

This may be the most only intelligent thing Filmdrunk.com has ever said.

 
NaturalDrunkenPungence 2009-11-03 12:52:58 PM  
pd771: EsteeFlwrPot: NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

If you dare say that to an actual Persian you'll get your ass kicked. Just saying.

You'd get your ass kicked for pointing out their origin. I'd think they'd be pissed if you thought they were all Arabic. I know that pissed off the Persian guy I knew.

EsteeFlwrPot: Abracapocalypse: The funny thing is the words "Iran" and "Ireland" are actually from the same root word "Arya" which is where they got Aryan from.

I thought the root word of Ireland was Ire, meaning anger.

You're both wrong. It came from the Gaelic word for the Patron Goddess of the country.


Fano: pd771: NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

correct. In fact, Xenophon described ancient Persians as whiter than his own Greek troops. There are also Persians with blue eyes. I found it very hilarious those who claimed casting him was racist. Most of those people wanted someone who had arabic features.

True Persians look down on the donkey farkers that claim to be the face of the Middle East.


NaturalDrunkenPungence: EsteeFlwrPot: NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

If you dare say that to an actual Persian you'll get your ass kicked. Just saying.

Abracapocalypse: The funny thing is the words "Iran" and "Ireland" are actually from the same root word "Arya" which is where they got Aryan from.

I thought the root word of Ireland was Ire, meaning anger.

Not so much, while some Iranians may get angry at that, most of them I've met have actually been proud of the fact that they were different from the rest of the muslim world, and some of them were actually pretty cocky about the fact that they were white. Especially the ones that call themselves Persian, because they don't at all agree with the Islamic Revolution, hence not calling themselves Iranian.


1, 2, 3. OWNED

 
CrankMyBlueSax 2009-11-03 12:53:04 PM  
t3knomanser: I'm sorry, you're confusing ancient Persia with ancient Europe. You're also confusing modern day Iran with Iraq.

No, I was not confused.

 
MugzyBrown [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:54:34 PM  
pd771: You're both wrong. It came from the Gaelic word for the Patron Goddess of the country.

No, Ire is latin for drunk and land is greek for potato.

 
pd771 [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:54:46 PM  
Fano: Aladdin was a chinese boy, there, I said it.

Yeah, but most people equate genii with the Middle East. It was just much marketable the way they did it.

 
Gamer Grrrl [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:56:21 PM  
pd771: It came from the Gaelic word for the Patron Goddess of the country.

No, no it really didn't.

 
EsteeFlwrPot 2009-11-03 12:56:27 PM  
pd771: Fano: Aladdin was a chinese boy, there, I said it.

Yeah, but most people equate genii with the Middle East. It was just much marketable the way they did it.


Wait what?

 
Kuta 2009-11-03 12:57:33 PM  
NON-ANIMATED 3D MOVIES SUCK.

 
Mr. Slippyfist 2009-11-03 12:58:58 PM  
I cannot believe that Jerry Bruckheimer would produce something that didn't have 100% historical fact behind it.

Especially a fantasy movie that is described on IMDB as "Based on the video game, which follows an adventurous prince who teams up with a rival princess to stop an angry ruler from unleashing a sandstorm that could destroy the world".

 
FunkOut [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 12:59:00 PM  
NaturalDrunkenPungence: EsteeFlwrPot: NaturalDrunkenPungence: This movie looks terrible. That said, The people of Persia, and modern day Iran, actually are white. They're darker skinned, but then again, so are Italians. But the Persians were what we would call 'Caucasian'

If you dare say that to an actual Persian you'll get your ass kicked. Just saying.

Abracapocalypse: The funny thing is the words "Iran" and "Ireland" are actually from the same root word "Arya" which is where they got Aryan from.

I thought the root word of Ireland was Ire, meaning anger.

Not so much, while some Iranians may get angry at that, most of them I've met have actually been proud of the fact that they were different from the rest of the muslim world, and some of them were actually pretty cocky about the fact that they were white. Especially the ones that call themselves Persian, because they don't at all agree with the Islamic Revolution, hence not calling themselves Iranian.


I once met a guy who called himself Persian, then one day admitted in a very depressed tone that he was actually a Cypriot of Persian descent, as though it would some terrible secret.

 
yakmans_dad 2009-11-03 12:59:04 PM  
GypsyJoker: while Gemma Arterton whispers expository dialog in your ear like she wants to do you.

TFA says this like it's a bad thing.


Which it3knomanser: CrankMyBlueSax: Ancient Persia was largely populated by superstitious, smelly, barbarians.

I'm sorry, you're confusing ancient Persia with ancient Europe. You're also confusing modern day Iran with Iraq. Modern day Iran is one of the most Westernized cultures in the region, ironic considering the reactionary nature of the government.

And in the era of Cyrus the Great, Persia was in a golden age on par with the height of the peak of the Hellenic era. Essentially, Greek and Persian culture borrowed heavily from each other.

And let's be frank: modern Christianity wouldn't exist without the influence of Zoroastrianism on Judaism.


I don't think so. Zoroastrianism is more akin to Manicheanism. Some people used to link Zoroastrianism to Christianity via the Mithraic cults of the Roman legions, but there's no evidence that Mithraic cults existed until a century after Christ.

 
AnotherDisillusionedCollegeStudent 2009-11-03 12:59:13 PM  
EsteeFlwrPot: If you dare say that to an actual Persian you'll get your ass kicked. Just saying.

Umm, no. I know plenty of Persians. They get mad when others think they're Arabs. They then point out that they're white and their language is more closely related to English than Arabic. I mean, the average Sicilian and Persian are damn near indistinguishable.

t3knomanser: CrankMyBlueSax: Ancient Persia was largely populated by superstitious, smelly, barbarians.

I'm sorry, you're confusing ancient Persia with ancient Europe. You're also confusing modern day Iran with Iraq. Modern day Iran is one of the most Westernized cultures in the region, ironic considering the reactionary nature of the government.

And in the era of Cyrus the Great, Persia was in a golden age on par with the height of the peak of the Hellenic era. Essentially, Greek and Persian culture borrowed heavily from each other.

And let's be frank: modern Christianity wouldn't exist without the influence of Zoroastrianism on Judaism.


That. Persia's been civilized for damn near 5,000 years. Iran is more like Greece 100 years ago than any of the Arab countries. They see the West, particularly the British, as the Turks, that is, barbarians from afar who are exploiting the great and noble culture. Religion's only a way of propagating the idea.

 
pd771 [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 01:00:24 PM  
EsteeFlwrPot: pd771: Fano: Aladdin was a chinese boy, there, I said it.

Yeah, but most people equate genii with the Middle East. It was just much marketable the way they did it.

Wait what?

Although Aladdin is a Middle-Eastern tale, the story is set in China, and Aladdin is explicitly Chinese.

Link (new window)

 
Lloyd Braun 2009-11-03 01:00:25 PM  
i44.tinypic.com

Did anybody else play this in 1990 and get blown away by the amazing graphics and animation?

 
LeroyBourne 2009-11-03 01:01:03 PM  
I miss movies that actually ended. I'm sure they're already in the works for a farking trilogy for this cash cow. meh.
/won't see this shiate

 
EsteeFlwrPot 2009-11-03 01:02:06 PM  
One thing about the Perisans is for sure. They are one good looking group of people. During that whole election thing I saw a bunch of pictures and holy fark is that a hot country. If I was single I would go there to find myself a boyfriend.

 
pd771 [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 01:02:33 PM  
Gamer Grrrl: pd771: It came from the Gaelic word for the Patron Goddess of the country.

No, no it really didn't.




In Irish mythology, Ériu (Irish pronunciation: [ˈeːrʲu]), daughter of Ernmas of the Tuatha Dé Danann, was the eponymous matron goddess of Ireland. Her husband was Mac Gréine ('Son of the Sun').[1] She was the mother of Bres by Prince Elatha of the Fomorians.

The English name for Ireland comes from the name Ériu and the Germanic (Old Norse or Anglo-Saxon) word land.
Link (new window)

 
Gamer Grrrl [TotalFark] 2009-11-03 01:08:35 PM  
pd771: Gamer Grrrl: pd771: It came from the Gaelic word for the Patron Goddess of the country.

No, no it really didn't.



In Irish mythology, Ériu (Irish pronunciation: [ˈeːrʲu]), daughter of Ernmas of the Tuatha Dé Danann, was the eponymous matron goddess of Ireland. Her husband was Mac Gréine ('Son of the Sun').[1] She was the mother of Bres by Prince Elatha of the Fomorians.

The English name for Ireland comes from the name Ériu and the Germanic (Old Norse or Anglo-Saxon) word land.
Link (new window)


Sorry, I was referring to the etymology of the name, not the mythology.

 
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