I hate these potatoes. There's a dead fly in these potatoes.

Waiter! There's a fly in my test!
Of course! That's the test d'jour!

That's my highschool

/facepalm

Well school is all about learning lessons and sometimes those lessons are about life and not just books. In this case, the kid learned that it's not always a good idea to put something in your mouth just because some old guy promised you things if you did.

I wanna know who the teacher is, damnit!

Ok, went and found out that my old Algebra teacher is still teaching there and this sounds pretty much right up his alley.

exick: Well school is all about learning lessons and sometimes those lessons are about life and not just books. In this case, the kid learned that it's not always a good idea to put something in your mouth just because some old guy promised you things if you did.

Seriously, who can resist candy?

the teacher would have no cause for complaint if the kid went all Seth Brundle on his ass.

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly.
I don't know why she swallowed the fly,
I guess she'll die.

There was an old lady who swallowed a spider,
that wiggled and wiggled and tickled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly.
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old lady who swallowed a bird.
How absurd to swallow a bird.
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider,
that wiggled and wiggled and tickled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly.
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old lady who swallowed a cat.
Imagine that, she swallowed a cat.
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird.
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider,
that wiggled and wiggled and tickled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly.
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old lady who swallowed a dog.
My what a hog, to swallow a dog.
She swallowed the dog to catch the cat.
She swallowed the cat, to catch the bird,
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider,
that wiggled and wiggled and tickled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly.
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.
I guess she'll die.

There was an old lady who swallowed a cow.
I don't know how she swallowed a cow.
She swallowed the cow to catch the dog.
She swallowed the dog, to catch the cat.
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird.
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider,
that wiggled and wiggled and tickled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly.
I don't know why she swallowed the fly
I guess she'll die.

I know an old lady who swallowed a horse...

She's dead of course!

Bathia_Mapes: There was an old lady who swallowed a fly.
I don't know why she swallowed the fly,
I guess she'll die.

I always heard that with the last line of "perhaps" she'll die.

CruiserTwelve: Bathia_Mapes: There was an old lady who swallowed a fly.
I don't know why she swallowed the fly,
I guess she'll die.

I always heard that with the last line of "perhaps" she'll die.

Me, too, but I just sang the whole thing to myself anyway.

You could say I got a kick out of it.

Or maybe that was the horse.

Next up: a toy Yoda if you have perfect attendance!

Well...the test and the gradebook are two totally different things:

One's done in red pencil, the other's done in red ink.

Think about that, kiddies.

/Trig was easier than Algebra in high school for me....weird

I remembered we had two dumbasses in chemistry class. One just bubbled in B all the way down and the other actually tried. The bubble B guy got a better score.


Even cooler story, the head cheerleader was in my chem class (FSM knows why). She got into it with one of the nerds about the freezing point of Mercury. After about 10 minutes of yelling and confusion back and forth, she finally shouted "YOU CAN'T FREEZE MERCURY, IT'S A PLANET"

'Twas the funniest thing I've ever witnessed.

I'm struggling to decide what makes him more of a dumbass here: eating the fly itself or informing the media of it.

Bathia_Mapes: There was an old lady who swallowed a...i>


heh heh. she swallows.

God sometimes I wish I was a high school teacher. Wouldn't be long till I was on Fark though either.

Confabulat: God sometimes I wish I was a high school teacher. Wouldn't be long till I was on Fark though either.

Perhaps he'll die?

Bathia_Mapes: There was an old lady who swallowed a fly....

Thanks for reminding me of this band, Bathia. I'd nearly forgotten about 'em.

Call Me Alice - Fly

Thanks to you Pandora.com also, for introducing me to begin with!

StealthStalker: Bathia_Mapes: There was an old lady who swallowed a fly....

Thanks for reminding me of this band, Bathia. I'd nearly forgotten about 'em.

Call Me Alice - Fly

Thanks to you Pandora.com also, for introducing me to begin with!



Let's try that again.

Call Me Alice - Fly

I give up, youtube it yourself!

/I'll take this as a sign to go to sleep.
//yay sleep

Fark that!
I would have kick that teachers a$$.

/a deal is a deal

i caught a live fly in my hand today... ninja skillz, i haz dem.

/did not eat said fly.

exick: Well school is all about learning lessons and sometimes those lessons are about life and not just books. In this case, the kid learned that it's not always a good idea to put something in your mouth just because some old guy promised you things if you did.

In school of lifemanship, this is known as the "MJ Lesson".

If the kid saved the test and his friends saw what happened, the teacher is about to learn a lesson too.

This kid isn't going to be enjoying school for anytime soon. The administration officials are going to give him hell for going public on this.

A deal's a deal, you son of a biatch.

Dear Kid,

Sometimes people in authority treat you like crap. Doing stupid things which you would otherwise not do because the authority person promised you something only makes this worse.

Yours truly,
Most Of Humanity

Confabulat: God sometimes I wish I was a high school teacher. Wouldn't be long till I was on Fark though either.

LOL
haha
ahahaa
ha ha
ha

ha?

Fapinator: Dear Kid,

Sometimes people in authority treat you like crap. Doing stupid things which you would otherwise not do because the authority person promised you something only makes this worse.

Yours truly,
Most Of Humanity

Isn't this the same town as the smoke nazis from the thread the other day? What's in the water there?

Back in High School, a buddy had no clue in Biology.

We had to take weekly subject tests. Since he sat to my left at a square, four-person lab table, it was easy for him to cheat off my answers with my cooperation. He'd even nudge my left elbow if I inadvertently moved my arm to obstruct his view.

He was always careful to mark one answer differently from mine.

Late in the semester, he told me that he'd studied very hard, and was confident about the test and that he would not cheat. I watched him during the test, and he never looked at my test sheet.

The next day, our teacher started class with a 10 minute monologue about cheating without making any direct accusations. Then he handed out the test papers.

Our two papers matched exactly.

He cheated off me for the rest of the year, and no more was said.

/yeah, I know

MoeSzyslak: Isn't this the same town as the smoke nazis from the thread the other day? What's in the water there?

Hey, fark you buddy! 3 people do not constitute the entire population. Those farktard people suing their neighbors live in my parent's community.

Holy shiat! I hope it's not my parents!!

DssDevl: Fark that!
I would have kick that teachers a$$.

/a deal is a deal

Send Peter Fonda to talk with him...

/or Nicholas Cage?

Ender's: MoeSzyslak: Isn't this the same town as the smoke nazis from the thread the other day? What's in the water there?

Hey, fark you buddy! 3 people do not constitute the entire population. Those farktard people suing their neighbors live in my parent's community.

Holy shiat! I hope it's not my parents!!

So what did your smoke nazi parents have to say when you told them that you ate a fly to get an A on a test and your cunning plan backfired?

"Bust a deal, face The Wheel"

/hot like 80's Tina

When I was in 2nd grade (the year the Challenger shuttle exploded) I blatantly erased a smarter kid's name on a test and wrote in my own. And got caught. After the fallout, I have never lied again in my 30 years of life.
/except to cops
//and women I'm trying to fark

So the teacher is a dirtbag for welching on a deal. But the investigation launched by the principle is the least of his problems. Now that the story is on Fark, someone from PETA is sure to note that he "crushed a fly between his hands during class"

Chaghatai: "Bust a deal, face The Wheel"

/hot like 80's Tina

Excellent!

StealthStalker: StealthStalker: Bathia_Mapes: There was an old lady who swallowed a fly....

Thanks for reminding me of this band, Bathia. I'd nearly forgotten about 'em.

Call Me Alice - Fly

Thanks to you Pandora.com also, for introducing me to begin with!



Let's try that again.

Call Me Alice - Fly

Bonus: That URL has the word fark in it

Welcome to the real world kid. It's just like that out here, except with spiders.

Stupid though it is, eating a fly should be worth an A on one test. If he is that dumb all the time it'll sort itself out.

If the teacher is dumb enough to allow the bet and didn't hold up his end well the kid can find out where he parks and it'll sort itself out.


/a fly for a fly?
//sorry

"When we contacted the principal at Oak Ridge High School to get their side of the story"

The principle is a Siamese Twin?

Complain, complain.

I think faculty parks like right in front of the office at Oak Ridge. Not gonna be easy.

Norad: I hate these potatoes. There's a dead fly in these potatoes.

Better not complain, they may charge you for the extra meat.


Juniper Jupiter: Well...the test and the gradebook are two totally different things:


/Trig was easier than Algebra in high school for me....weird

I too couldn't grasp algebra and failed college algebra twice but almost Aced trig and geometry. teach couldn't figure it either, lol. adding numbers an letters didn't add up to me.

Fapinator: Dear Kid,

Sometimes people in authority treat you like crap. Doing stupid things which you would otherwise not do because the authority person promised you something only makes this worse.

Yours truly,
Most Of Humanity

Ps. The ball is now in YOUR court. Perhaps you and a dozen or so of your friends could get together and teach the teacher a lesson.

""I usually study, but not this one," Stephen said. "I thought it would be an easy way out."
"

He got a 9 out of 46. A NINE! "Not studying" doesn't fail that hard; you need some weapons grade stupid to back it up to fail that hard.

And what did we learn today, Timmy?

That's right. Be very specific when making a deal. Here's some dental floss, there's a wing stuck in your teeth.