IFAIK, there are several westernised countries where it's actually a capital offence to mock Pink Floyd.

/and Tool

"Oh no, this is side two of Dark Side of the Moon! He's in a Floyd hole!"

Vocals "optional"?

Go to 3:45, she makes Whitney Houston sound like the baritone from some barber shop quartet. (new window)

That clip of Hocus Pocus - after all these years, I'm still not sure if that sucked or kicks righteous ass...

Rain-Monkey: That clip of Hocus Pocus - after all these years, I'm still not sure if that sucked or kicks righteous ass...

It kicked ass until about the 400th time your stoned out brother played it for you.

Rain-Monkey: That clip of Hocus Pocus - after all these years, I'm still not sure if that sucked or kicks righteous ass...

the parts that didn't suck kicked righteous ass.

great article. funny.

This is why we can't have nice things.

/ Either you get it or don't, won't explain
// Loves Porcupine Tree greatly
/// And OSI was 13 kinds of awesome.
//// And Rush has had their good days

The "nice and Greasy" cover scares me.

I always thought real progrock was a LOT less pretentious and douchey than glam or whatever. Probably another case where 6 people have 8 ideas about which is which.

As a prog fan, this made me laugh pretty hard and it's pretty spot on in points. Prog can be pretty pretentious and silly at times, but then again that's part of its charm.

/Rush and Porcupine Tree FTW
//Echolyn and Spock's Beard are good too

I LOLed at most of it.

Used to be a HUGE Genesis fan, especially their 70's stuff, when I discovered it in the early 90's.

"With 160GB of storage, iPod classic can now hold up to 40 progressive rock songs. Just $249." ROTFL!

/let's see, 79 Genesis songs, 50 Pink Floyd songs, 103 Queensryche songs.. I think I've got 40 beat.

As a huge prog fan with several hundred gigs worth of albums & concerts from pretty much every band named in the article - I can't find fault with anything mentioned. Funny stuff, spot on in too many instances.

/listening to Pink Floyd's KQED show before/while reading this

this explains why my friends made fun of me in the early '80's. i was the only guy that got king crimson while sober.

I think "Peter Gabriel's Pants" is my new band name.

That's what I like about prog. No matter how pretentious it seems, the fans usually admit to it and can make fun of themselves.

3. It is the only rock genre in which the term "flute solo" has any meaning

Approves:



/hot like steve hackett's subsequent guitar solo

I like you, Cracked, but you'd better stop mocking my music.

OK, you can mock the Love Beach album cover but not in an article about prog rock.

TommyymmoT: Vocals "optional"?

Go to 3:45, she makes Whitney Houston sound like the baritone from some barber shop quartet. (new window)

Annie Haslam was/is an amazing vocalist.

Not much of an improvisor, though.

As a pretentious fan of most of those bands mentioned, I approve of the article - especially the last part where the band name and song list were just awesome. I really enjoyed the way the article mixed real information with understated humor, I love the genre and I'm pretty sure the writer does as well.

I laughed.

Gulper Eel: 3. It is the only rock genre in which the term "flute solo" has any meaning


This immediately came to mind:



(they did win a Grammy as best heavy metal band though)

As a prog fan, I found this article painful to read, but only because it made me laugh so hard.

Yeah, so much more pretentious than interviews with faux-punk acts who proclaim, for example, "Lead guitar is gay! We don't need it!!11!"

Always missing is the admission that they can't play lead guitar, rhythm guitar, Guitar Hero II, or even those little push-button Elmo plastic guitars worth a cow's ass.

I like the too often overlooked prog-folk sub-sub-genre.

Does Isis count as progressive?

some farker: king crimson

Link

HempHead: (they did win a Grammy as best heavy metal band though)

Hard Rock/Metal

My favorite prog album's more obscure than yours:



/TFA was hilarious.

Rev. Skarekroe: I like the too often overlooked prog-folk sub-sub-genre.

Hell yes! Perhaps my favorite of my obscure 70s music phase in high school.
This is pretty awesome too:

I need.... to science.

CertainTommyymmoT: Vocals "optional"?

Go to 3:45, she makes Whitney Houston sound like the baritone from some barber shop quartet. (new window)

no.

Sgt Otter: "Oh no, this is side two of Dark Side of the Moon! He's in a Floyd hole!"


Came for this, can now leave happy.

That was far better (and funnier) than I expected. Well done, Cracked. And +1 for embedded youtube of Porcupine Tree.

/fyi, the new one grows on you a lot after the 4th listen
//but still not sure what to do w/ disc 2

FTA: The concept album is a staple of progressive rock. Examples range from Pink Floyd's Animals (about the evils of capitalism) ...

Please tell me that's a farking joke. "Animals" is based on George Orwell's "Animal Farm," which is about the evils of fascism/socialism. ("All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others").

+ a lot for the Demons and Wizards.

I just want to ask, would Muse be considered Prog? I've considered them a prog rock band mostly because I really like the stuff they experiment with (distortion effects, alternative percussion, slap bass, whatever). A rock band doing a 3-part 14 minute orchestral rock symphony about space exploration seems to qualify in my eyes.

Though I'm sure some people disagree... I'm just not sure why.

Jethro Tull's famous concept album, Thick As A Brick, consisted of a solitary track lasting for 43 minutes.

I LOLLED. At one time, my list of qualities a woman must have in order to be considered girlfriend material included "can listen to and understand entire Thick as a Brick album." Enjoying it was optional, but dammit- it was important music!

Needless to say, after it became clear that subjecting women to 45 minutes of Jethro Tull and asking them for a critical analysis was no way to get laid, the requirement was crossed off the list.

As a prog fan, I laughed heartily at the 40 songs in 160GB thing.

Blues_X: Sgt Otter: "Oh no, this is side two of Dark Side of the Moon! He's in a Floyd hole!"


Came for this, can now leave happy.

There was so many great quotes about Prog Rock in that episode.

I've got 47 songs with a length over 10 minutes. "Supper's Ready" by Genesis is the top two spots, studio version 22:53, live version 24:33.

Kudos for mentioning Dream Theater and Octavarium

TommyymmoT: Vocals "optional"?

Go to 3:45, she makes Whitney Houston sound like the baritone from some barber shop quartet. (new window)

This. Saw Renaissance last month in Glenside, PA on their 40th Anniversary tour. Annie's still got the chops, even if her current band wasn't completely up to snuff. Her voice is still amazing.

Great find, subby.

the author went pretty easy on the whole genre. I was expecting to come out of that offended. I laughed pretty hard at the song structure charts

Alphax: I've got 47 songs with a length over 10 minutes. "Supper's Ready" by Genesis is the top two spots, studio version 22:53, live version 24:33.

Go check out the first Utopia album. "The Ikon" clocks in at a little over 30 minutes.

I respect the genre for being adventurous, but I never really "got" prog.

/even though my FARK id is from a 1973 Genesis song
//to me Genesis isn't prog. It's just Genesis
///yeah I love the later stuff too

Genesis = meh
Phil Collins = blech

Hilarious article, read it a few days ago. Its funny cuz its true.

Love me some Dream Theater, Porcupine Tree, Riverside, Opeth, Spock's Beard, Rush, Pink Floyd, Gordian Knot, Marillion, OSI, LTE, Transatlantic, Pain of Salvation, Queensrych too name a few.

:-p

Lol at "Dongs. But in a Normal Way"

My Love

+1 for calling Nickelback the Nicholas Cage of music.

I like short songs.