"hey, lets go park and not fool around in my Volvo!"



Sad really, Volvo has had some hot cars over the years.

They're boxy, but they're good.

Bland?

Uh, try that again. Bland?



/ hawt

I was unaware teenage girls had the funds or the credit to buy new cars.

Volvos?

Pfft.



All movies should feature tricked-out Yugos...

... even period-piece films like Last of the Mohicans, 1776, and Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.

You can't tell me that Peter Jackson's King Kong couldn't have been improved by way of a fleet of Yugos chasing after the title character.

The Icelander: I was unaware teenage girls had the funds or the credit to buy new cars.

teenage girls have rich daddies.

or so I'm told.

Buy Volvos. They're boxy, but they're good. We know they're not sexy. This is not a time to be sexy anyway with so many new diseases around. Be safe instead of sexy. Volvo: boxy but good.

It worked last time.

Blackbird: Buy Volvos. They're boxy, but they're good. We know they're not sexy. This is not a time to be sexy anyway with so many new diseases around. Be safe instead of sexy. Volvo: boxy but good.

It worked last time.

Saab.

Not all Volvos are boxy, boring or ugly:

The Icelander: I was unaware teenage girls had the funds or the credit to buy new cars.

They don't. Teenage girls have mommies and daddies who have credit and want their precious to be in a safe car.

Teenage girl volvos.

That is all.

I don't think the C30 is exactly bland. It's not eyepopping great, but it's not bad.

What if the Volvo sparkles? Would that make it less bland?

Indolent: What if the Volvo sparkles? Would that make it less bland?

What if the Volvo does nothing that a car is suppose to do? Would that be more in-step with the film?

Blackbird: Buy Volvos. They're boxy, but they're good. We know they're not sexy. This is not a time to be sexy anyway with so many new diseases around. Be safe instead of sexy. Volvo: boxy but good.

That's Crazy People.

Dirty Hot Linker: Indolent: What if the Volvo sparkles? Would that make it less bland?

What if the Volvo does nothing that a car is suppose to do? Would that be more in-step with the film?

Yes. It would be a vortex of suck.

Dirty Hot Linker: What if the Volvo does nothing that a car is suppose to do? Would that be more in-step with the film?



Approves.

Teenaged girls took to safe, bland vampires. Why not cars?

You fool! Swedish cars are wonderful when they're not run by American companies.

Any Saab purists here? I learned to drive a stick shift on a Saab 99, like the one pictured here.

iStig: Uh, try that again. Bland?

i'm more of a VW/Audi fan, but I gave one of these a serious look recently. nice ride.

Laugh while you can, monkey-boy. I already know a girl at work who got a XC60 for exactly that reason.

No different, really, than all the teenage guys who got Firebirds and Trans-Ams in the '70's because of Burt Reynolds in "Smokey and the Bandit". Or the people who bought Mini Coopers after "The Italian Job.

eddyatwork: The Icelander: I was unaware teenage girls had the funds or the credit to buy new cars.

They don't. Teenage girls have mommies and daddies who have credit and want their precious to be in a safe car.

True, but my daughter's getting a 10-year-old Volvo. No credit involved.

Came here for the C30 references, and am leaving pleased.

/Very cool farking car.

Well, they liked safe, bland vampires...

Maybe he borrows it from the Swedish vampire that was in "Let the Right One In". That would be a cool crossover.

eddyatwork: The Icelander: I was unaware teenage girls had the funds or the credit to buy new cars.

They don't. Teenage girls have mommies and daddies who have credit and want their precious to be in a safe car.

You just described my ex-girlfriend. Her parents bought her a brand new S40 because of how safe they are. They wanted their precious to drive to college in a safe car (she had no choice on a car).

I drove a Tercel that was totaled when a drunk driver hit me after she broke up with me. :(

timujin: Not all Volvos are boxy, boring or ugly:

*boner*

My kids will start driving in four or five years. I hope my 1993 850 GLT will still be running just fine, I know it will still be low to the ground, heavy, a hair underpowered and safe as a house. Then they can drive that.

Sonofabiatch is hard on heater blowers, though.

Britney Spear's Speculum: Dirty Hot Linker: What if the Volvo does nothing that a car is suppose to do? Would that be more in-step with the film?



Approves.

Stopped by for the Blade reference, was not disappointed.

no, what you'll see is the guys who wind up on To Catch a Predator buying up these cars in an attempt to seem more like a real-life Edward Cullen

and when you think about it, that guy is a lot like the To Catch a Predator set...

Came for the S60R...
/damnit I did, brb new pants

rackrent: You fool! Swedish cars are wonderful when they're not run by American companies.

Any Saab purists here? I learned to drive a stick shift on a Saab 99, like the one pictured here.

I used to be. Could be again I suppose. I had a succession of classic 900 and SPGs. I now drive an impure SAAB.

man, those look terrible scaled down...
So here's an V70R

kakarot251: Came for the S60R...
/damnit I did, brb new pants

I used to have an s60r. It was a fun car, just terrible depreciation and FWD. :(

CarnySaur: Maybe he borrows it from the Swedish vampire that was in "Let the Right One In". That would be a cool crossover.


Only if Eli ends up repeating the pool scene with the Cullens. Then it would be awesome.

Sparkle pedo's getting a station wagon?

Just when you think they've hit rock bottom, they start digging...

If you hit rock bottom, wouldn't you need to start drilling? Digging is prettý useless in bedrock.

This is a lost T

The thing that teenage girls are into are boys who show strength without deuchey anger and reliability without whiney dependence.

The only ones who like a teenage boys in flashy sports cars are other teenage boys.

Guys into hot cars are realy latent homosexuals, and there is nothing wrong with that, but they need to accept it.

minnesotaboy: The thing that teenage girls are into are boys who show strength without deuchey anger and reliability without whiney dependence.

The only ones who like a teenage boys in flashy sports cars are other teenage boys.

Guys into hot cars are realy latent homosexuals, and there is nothing wrong with that, but they need to accept it.

If being gay means I get one of these, sign me up!

Guys, here's a secret: Shallow girls really don't care what you drive. Really. They don't give a rat's ass how much horsepower your midlife crisis sports car has. Image isn't what they're after. No, what's really happening is the female is sizing up the male as part of an animalistic mating ritual.

A sports car doesn't say "I'm cool" or "I have money". It says, "My wallet is looser than a porn star's vagina." At this point, you're not a prospect -- you're prey.

Volvo's making a shrewd bet. If it works, girls will want guys who drive Volvos, because in their minds, such a car will say, "This guy is like Edward." Never mind it's nonsense; this is basically the same wiring that females use to size up males at the insect level. It works both ways, but girls who associate cars with men are idiots. Really, you don't want to date a girl that. Even if she's epic hot, that crazy scheming mind will put you through a world of hurt.

I mentioned this sizing up is animalistic, so maybe you guys remember those Nature Channel programs as two mammals hilariously humping like crazy in a savannah or a lion lording over a harem, but you're forgetting the parts where the female watches the males fight each other, initially rejects the victor on principle, forces him to perform a three-hour mating dance, then attacks him after only a few minutes of nooky.

So, my recommendation is to stick to the shiatty-ass bucket o' bolts that drives away skanks and goth fangirls like roaches hit with Raid. That'll allow you to meet a girl with a brain who won't give a rat's ass what you drive unless she's a genuine car enthusiast -- in which case, she'll know about Volvos but wouldn't have any clue what some fictional character drives in a crappy movie. She won't take your shiat, but that's a small price to pay for not having to be constantly compared to some crazy fat biatch's pulp vampodrama wet dream.

I don't love Volvos, but I love teenage Swedish girls.

I just had to laugh that Volvo was the best product placement they could muster. When I first saw the movie (whilst drinking), the sight of the little Volvo whipping around the corner with a neat little drift-stop made me sputter and burst out laughing. At first I thought it was a Focus, and if it wasn't an RS, that would have been MAJORLY hilarious.

/have you seen the RS? only ford this girl'll lay hands on:

Engine
Horsepower More than 277 hp
Torque More than 295 lbs.-ft
Engine Type Turbocharged 4 cylinder
Specs/Review (new window)

Hey guys Volvos don't look that ba...



Yeeeeech! What IS that?!

/Volvo 262
//A roof never looked more awkward

Splenda: I just had to laugh that Volvo was the best product placement they could muster. When I first saw the movie (whilst drinking), the sight of the little Volvo whipping around the corner with a neat little drift-stop made me sputter and burst out laughing. At first I thought it was a Focus, and if it wasn't an RS, that would have been MAJORLY hilarious.

/have you seen the RS? only ford this girl'll lay hands on:

Engine
Horsepower More than 277 hp
Torque More than 295 lbs.-ft
Engine Type Turbocharged 4 cylinder
Specs/Review (new window)

The RS has the exact same 2.5 Turbo that Volvo has been making for years now. In fact, the RS and the C30 AND the Mazda3 are pretty much the same car.

And for anyone that thinks Volvo's are bland, do a youtube search for V-8 Volvos.

timujin: Not all Volvos are boxy, boring or ugly:

Good point. The car in that picture is certainly not boxy.

I like my Volvo! The Maxima was better though.

Teen girls don't like Volvos.

Less-attractive, poorly-dressed, unintelligent girls LOVE Volvos, especially if they come with a vampire that likes the for god-knows-what reason.

/aim low
/aim for Twilight fans

kakarot251: man, those look terrible scaled down...
So here's an V70R

V70R.

For when you want to drift-race a hearse.(tm)

/available at your local funeral-home/ricergas station