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(UPI) Stupid Mysterious library patron censoring naughty words from books. Other readers forced to deal with vandalized copies of "Moby ████" and "Madame B█████"   (upi.com) divider line 215
More: Stupid, Odd News stories, expletives, Daily Herald, Columbia  

215 Comments   (+0 »)


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Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:21:37 PM  
America, land of the free and home of the brave.

 
alonzinator [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:25:39 PM  
I didn't know utterfly was a bad word.

 
rmz [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:29:54 PM  
alonzinator: I didn't know utterfly was a bad word.

Apparently "ovary" is.

 
aden_nak [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:33:46 PM  
This person needs a hobby. Or to get laid.

And no, I don't volunteer.

Without pics.

 
Adjective Bird Whiskey [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:36:43 PM  
Hey thanks for vandalizing public property, dickface.

 
Adjective Bird Whiskey [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:37:29 PM  
I'm sorry, I meant ████face.

 
Your Faith is Creepy [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:38:25 PM  
ignorance is strength.

 
The Onanist 2009-10-27 05:45:47 PM  
alonzinator: I didn't know utterfly was a bad word.

It's not. It's an opera.

 
Rev. Skarekroe [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:46:35 PM  
aden_nak: This person needs a hobby.

Sounds to me like she's got one.

 
Boritom [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:48:15 PM  
This creep would probably censor the works of Akira I███ube on the basis of his name.

Intercourse the Penguin!

 
Sgt Otter [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 05:57:14 PM  
img.photobucket.com

She got to the video section, too!

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:09:02 PM  
Madame Boner?

 
MaxxLarge [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:13:24 PM  
Other books on his "█hit List:"

The G███s of Wrath - John Steinbeck
Catch-22 - Joseph ███er
A P██age to India - E.M. Forster
The ████ and the Dead - Norman Mailer
Main Street - ██clair Lewis
Of Human ██████ - W. Somerset Maugham
The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret At███
Brides███ Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
Deliverance - James ███ey
Iron███ - William Kennedy
Wide Sarg██o Sea - Jean Rhys
████house Five - Kurt Vonnegut
A Prayer for Owen ████ - John Irving
Zuleika Dobson - Max ███bohm
Something Wicked This Way ████ - Ray Bradbury
The Autobiography of Malcolm █
Lady Chatterley's ████ - D.H. Lawrence
The Beautiful and the █████ - F. Scott Fitzgerald

 
namatad [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:15:45 PM  
rmz: alonzinator: I didn't know utterfly was a bad word.

Apparently "ovary" is.


need to hunt these people down and censor them
or at the very least beat them about the head

 
Hagbardr [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:19:47 PM  
This is a clbuttic case of inappropriate censorship. This person should be embarrbutted by their buttumption that Americans can't handle their Conbreastutional rights to free speech.

 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:28:30 PM  
Sgt Otter: img.photobucket.com

She got to the video section, too!


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

So much win.


/don't even TRY to use that library's selection of H███hrey Bogart films
//like The Amazing Dr. C███████████ (pops)

 
Infamous Dr. X [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:42:01 PM  
Hagbardr

Awesome.

 
brigid_fitch [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:42:38 PM  
MaxxLarge: Other books on his "█hit List:"

You forgot:

The ████tape Letters - C.S. Lewis
The Turning of the ████ - Henry James
The ████ and the Dead - Norman Mailer
The ████ian - Owen Wister
As I ████ Dying - William Faulkner
Winnie the ████ - A.A. Milne
The ████istant - Bernard Malamud
The Fountain████ - Ayn Rand
A Good Man is ████ to Find - Flannery O'Connor
████ Lunch - William S. Burroughs

 
wingedkat [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:42:59 PM  
If this person doesn't like English the way we use it, he should learn a different language.

 
MaxxLarge [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:44:49 PM  
brigid_fitch: You forgot:

I sure did.

Man...dude is a BUSY li'l censor-dispenser.

 
brigid_fitch [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 06:50:15 PM  
MaxxLarge: brigid_fitch: You forgot:

I sure did.

Man...dude is a BUSY li'l censor-dispenser.


Oops, I just noticed that you already had The ████ and the Dead. :)

People like this seriously need to get a life. I used to be a HS English teacher & once had a parent complain about me teaching Macbeth to her child. Not that she thought it was violent or anything--no, she objected to the witches & ghosts. I had to excuse the kid from the lesson. Kid got 3 weeks of study hall instead of English class.

 
MaxxLarge [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 07:10:19 PM  
brigid_fitch: I used to be a HS English teacher & once had a parent complain about me teaching Macbeth to her child. Not that she thought it was violent or anything--no, she objected to the witches & ghosts.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess her objection was religious in nature? And that the irony of her objections to "witches and ghosts" was entirely lost on her, given all of the staggeringly shocking BS in the bible?

I may be way off base, but I'd still be willing to bet.

 
Procedural Texture 2009-10-27 07:31:53 PM  
I'm going to assume this is just another prudish xtian. We can desecrate your Holy Bi█le, too, you know.
Tit for tat.

"For God so loved the world that ██ g███ ███ o██ ███ ██f█ ███, ████ u██████ ████c███ ██ k███ ████y █o█ ███u██ ██r s██e ██████l ██f█."
John 3:16

 
MBK 2009-10-27 08:17:03 PM  
FTFM: "This person is evidently offended by these words," she said. "I'm more offended by (the suspect)."

Damn straight!

Nothing pisses me off like a bunch of book burning/censoring assholes.

 
Kierkegaard's Pseudonym 2009-10-27 08:17:41 PM  
Now I'm not a CSI-type detective, but there are two things you can do to catch this dastardly criminal:

1) Cross-reference the names of people who've checked out both Moby Dick and the 9/11 Report.

2) Assign a librarian to walk around the library, looking for people scribbling in their stock.

 
One Thirty-two and Bush 2009-10-27 08:18:45 PM  
█ucking fundie █unt.

 
Reverend Otis 2009-10-27 08:19:13 PM  
Kierkegaard's Pseudonym: Now I'm not a CSI-type detective, but there are two things you can do to catch this dastardly criminal:

1) Cross-reference the names of people who've checked out both Moby Dick and the 9/11 Report.

2) Assign a librarian to walk around the library, looking for people scribbling in their stock.


Very good idea. If they haven't gotten this tip already, you should pass that along.

 
Electriclectic 2009-10-27 08:21:08 PM  
The Onanist: alonzinator: I didn't know utterfly was a bad word.

It's not. It's an opera.


So, it IS a bad word.

 
SeamusFerrell 2009-10-27 08:21:41 PM  
Kierkegaard's Pseudonym: Now I'm not a CSI-type detective, but there are two things you can do to catch this dastardly criminal:

1) Cross-reference the names of people who've checked out both Moby Dick and the 9/11 Report.

2) Assign a librarian to walk around the library, looking for people scribbling in their stock.


Exactly what came to my mind immediately. That and amazement that people in Tennessee know how to read.

 
Theaetetus [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 08:22:45 PM  
Vandalizing community educational property = being a good Christian, apparently.

Frankly, I'm appalled that no one from this so-called religion of peace has come forward to condemn these acts.

 
Somaticasual [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 08:23:18 PM  
Luckily, it'll be hard to miss the lady in an amish dress with a sharpie..

//hint: she'll probably be the one sneering while reading.

 
HMS_Blinkin 2009-10-27 08:26:31 PM  
Can we just agree to censor any and all Jewish surnames? I'm sick of Rube ████berg comics.

 
Donnchadha 2009-10-27 08:27:09 PM  
I shall type my response to this in free form censored poem:

███ ███ █
███ ███ ███
█ █ ███ █
█ █ ███
███ █ ███ █
███ █ ███
███ █ ███ ███
███ ███ ███
█ █ ███
█ ███ █
█ █ █

█ ███ █ █
█ █ ███ █

 
Madame Ovary 2009-10-27 08:27:59 PM  
Cross-reference the names of people who've checked out both Moby Dick and the 9/11 Report.

A lot of library database systems deliberately do not maintain checkout histories, in order to prevent this sort of abuse.

/librarian

 
The Invisible Sky Wizard 2009-10-27 08:28:31 PM  
Kierkegaard's Pseudonym: Now I'm not a CSI-type detective, but there are two things you can do to catch this dastardly criminal:

1) Cross-reference the names of people who've checked out both Moby Dick and the 9/11 Report.


Doesn't work that way. At least not in our library. Once a book is discharged from a patron's account there's no record of what they checked out or when they checked it out unless the item is overdue. It's a privacy issue.

 
moops 2009-10-27 08:28:43 PM  
perhaps mr/ms bowdler should make this a little more exciting and "fark filter" books

Class 11: My Story Inside the CIA's Boobies-9/11 Spy Class by T. J. Waters

Biatch (Triple Crown Publications Presents) by Deja King and Maxine Thompson

Successful and Attractive African-American : An Autobiography by Dick Gregory and Robert Lipsyte

, Book Reads You! : by Yakov Smirnoff

How to Fark a Woman's Brains Out - by ThornDaddy and Dollie Llama

From Nubians to Gods, Vol. II: Escaping "Nubiantivity" & Becoming God by Akil

 
bifford 2009-10-27 08:29:01 PM  
Just another jerk who thinks here cause is so morally right and important that it easily justifies vandalizing public property.

 
dontpointthatthingatme 2009-10-27 08:29:15 PM  
Nice ideas, Fark CSI team, but the librarians already came up with a solution: they hung up a sign asking people not to do it.

I'll bet any Farker $10 that their sign has MS Clip Art at the bottom.

www.fotosearch.com

 
How's THIS for a fancy nickname 2009-10-27 08:30:06 PM  
Boy oh boy is this person ever a G█DA██ CU██ THAT I WOULD ████ AND ███████ ██ ██████ █████████ ███ ████ ████ ██████ ██ ████ ███ █ ██████ ███ ███████ ██ █████

 
Kierkegaard's Pseudonym 2009-10-27 08:30:33 PM  
Madame Ovary: A lot of library database systems deliberately do not maintain checkout histories, in order to prevent this sort of abuse.

/librarian


Then they can just ring up Homeland Security or bribe the guy that Morgan Freeman did in Seven.

 
genner 2009-10-27 08:31:03 PM  
from the article:
"This person is evidently offended by these words," she said. "I'm more offended by (the suspect)."

Why is (the suspect) in parentheses?
Did the original quote have a no no word in it?

 
Sir Charles 2009-10-27 08:32:17 PM  
  ▲
▲ ▲

 
UsikFark 2009-10-27 08:32:25 PM  
Bale: Ohhhhh, goooood for you. And how was it? I hope it was ------- good, because it's useless now, isn't it?

Hurlbut: OK.

Bale: ----- sake man, you're amateur. McG, you got ------- something to say to this prick?

Director Joseph 'McG' McGinty Nichol: I didn't see it happen.

Bale: Well, somebody should be ------- watching and keeping an eye on him.

McG: Fair enough.

 
UsikFark 2009-10-27 08:34:04 PM  
genner: Why is (the suspect) in parentheses?

Probably said "him" or something, and since neither the suspect or (the suspect's) gender is known...

 
Rusty Shackleford [TotalFark] 2009-10-27 08:34:14 PM  
www.islandnet.com

Godwin, I know, but pic very much related.

 
moops 2009-10-27 08:35:35 PM  
UsikFark: Director Joseph 'McG' McGinty Nichol: I didn't see it happen

Iron Balls McGinty?

 
farkingbubbler 2009-10-27 08:36:49 PM  
I work for a library, so I'm getting a ████ing kick out of these m████████████ replies.

 
Midnight Rambler 2009-10-27 08:38:29 PM  
www.law.wisc.edu

 
UsikFark 2009-10-27 08:38:31 PM  
moops: UsikFark: Director Joseph 'McG' McGinty Nichol: I didn't see it happen

Iron Balls McGinty?


---- Steve Martin can ----- his ------ shiny metal ---, ---------.

 
LadyMech 2009-10-27 08:39:24 PM  
I say we hurt the jerk down. Censor your own damn books. I hate it when I get a good library book only to find out someone has ripped out pages.

I once had to uncensor a book on Roman art. Seems like some Helen Lovejoy had put ducttape over all the visable genetalia. I thought about taking it to a librarian, but in my area, I can't be certain that one of them didn't do it. So I decided to fix it myself. Thankfully, the book had glossy pictures, otherwise I would have left it alone. I just carefully peeled the tape off to see some Roman wing-wang.

It wasn't that impressive or shocking, really. Nice statues though.

 
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