Swap?

Bob Schenck waded through the leech-filled swamp, creeping closer to the alligator.
...
Schenk wasn't in Africa, or even Florida.

Alligators don't live in Africa, Dorkporter.

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Some resident will turn that into tasty chourico in short order

There's a lot worse than alligators that one can catch in Fall River.

Come to our swap meet an alligator.

Not to defend subby but my brother got a caiman from a reptile swap once
/silly drunk or hateful friends killed it

Leeches? Fark that!

It must be teh glowbul warmingz.

That's a viral ad for American Eagle Outfitters.

new, on NBC: Leech swap!

We'll take some alligators off your hands. But only if you take Fall River AND New Bedford off ours.

Fall River, Massachusetts. Former home of Hank the angry drunken dwarf. He's dead.

/not from an alligator attack

drjekel_mrhyde: Not to defend subby but my brother got a caiman from a reptile swap once
/silly drunk or hateful friends killed it

Oh you can Google "reptile swap"

pureobscure: There's a lot worse than alligators that one can catch in Fall River.

THIS!

Fall River, Massachusetts. Former home of Lizzie Borden. She's dead.

/not from an alligator attack

Fall River, Massachusetts. Home of the longest bridge in the world.

/Yeah, I went there.

This is my boomstick: Fall River, Massachusetts. Home of the longest Rustiest bridge in the world.

/Yeah, I went there.

I don't get it. What do you swap the leeches for?

There is an exterminator in the RI/MA area that says jokingly in their ads that alligator removal is free. I would have called them up and made them follow through on their advertisement.

Seacop: longest Rustiest

Be fair, it is in the middle of being repainted, for the umpteenth time. And by the time the job is finished it'll be time to start all over again.

Home sweet home hell.

Pho Queue: I don't get it. What do you swap the leeches for?

Hepatitis C

/I'd have let the gator die, leeches suck.
//no pun intended, of course.

drjekel_mrhyde: Not to defend subby but my brother got a caiman from a reptile swap once
/silly drunk or hateful friends killed it

My roomie in college had one about 3 ft with tail. We moved and had it in a cardboard box, which the maintenance guy at the apartments opened.

That was some funny shiat.

Visit scenic Fall River, Massachusetts

Um...no. Never.

Yeah my buddy won one in a poker game down here in Florida a couple years ago. Wasn't big, 3 or 4 feet. So he put it in his girlfriend's bathtub and didn't tell her. I wish I could have been there when she went to hop in the shower.

Just a few weeks ago Schenck had a similar experience:

A Fall River landlord has finally evicted his most unwelcome tenant.
After five days of rooftop sunbathing, a 5-foot-long, 15-pound boa constrictor was trapped Thursday night in an attic of a six-family dwelling. It was unclear who owned the pet or whether it escaped or was abandoned.

"It actually slithered its way into a homemade trap,' said Robert Schenck, owner of Animal Instincts, a local pet store that captured the 2-year-old snake and has taken it in. He said the trap was a rabbit fur-filled cardboard box with a hole carved out.

I used to work in a pet store in Massachusetts near the Rhode Island border. Every month or so we would get someone coming in with a 'gator they'd bought in Rhode Island (where they don't need a permit to buy)trying to unload it because it got too big for them to handle.

The local zoo had a solid display thanks to such dumbasses and I know of one dude that converted his basement into a little habitat for refugees. He was weird, but would usually show up in an hour so whenever someone would come in.

My sister lives there. She's just the type to piss off an aligator.
/And biatchy enough to fight it.
//Whoever wins.
///WE LOSE.

what_now: Visit scenic Fall River, Massachusetts

Um...no. Never.

Why not? Excellent restaurants, a few good museums, and some great Victorian architecture to see. Not much to do at night, but Providence is about 15 minutes away.

This place isn't nearly as bad as everyone who doesn't live here (and some that do) like to make it out to be. The wife and I would be happy to buy you a beer and show you around if you ever find yourself down this way.

It's a great place with a lot of great people...too bad the city government is full of life-long bureaucrats who have no interest in changing the staus quo, but that's changing. There are folks down here trying to make it a better place.

With regards to the alligator... well, plenty of irresponsible pet owners in other parts of the country, too. Problem is the budget was cut for the Animal Control and we now have one or two animal control officers who have to cover Fall River and all the surrounding towns.

Last months issue of Outdoor Life had a nice 'tip' on how to remove a leech from your eyeball. Yes...eyeball.

I thought that was nice of them. Had drawings and all, so you would have no problem.

This is my boomstick: Fall River, Massachusetts. Home of the longest bridge in the world.

/Yeah, I went there.

Somerset to Portugal... or more fittingly, the Azores... since we now have a replica of the city gates on St. Michael down on the waterfront.

netcentric: Last months issue of Outdoor Life had a nice 'tip' on how to remove a leech from your eyeball. Yes...eyeball.

I thought that was nice of them. Had drawings and all, so you would have no problem.

I was about to make a comment about depth perception, but I think that would be the last of your worries at that point.

Yeah, I was born there.

JustMatt: There is an exterminator in the RI/MA area that says jokingly in their ads that alligator removal is free. I would have called them up and made them follow through on their advertisement.

If I owned the place, I would have followed through. Would make great advertisement food.

keylock71: This place isn't nearly as bad as everyone who doesn't live here (and some that do) like to make it out to be. The wife and I would be happy to buy you a beer and show you around if you ever find yourself down this way.

Well thank you. I take that back- I've never really spent time in Fall River, and you're right: I shouldn't denigrate it. I get pissed when people diss Somerville, so I'm sorry I made a Fall River crack.

I'll check it out!

Jeez, if a few more Farkers say they live around here we might just have to get a Fark party going.

First round's on Drew.

Got an alligator for my wife.

Good trade.

/rimshot

//not mandatory.

Ok... its only 5 foot. In Florida we have a 14' gator at the most popular swimming spot in the state, Wakulla Springs. And then St. Marks river has hundreds in it and you can't see them cause the water is brackish. 5 foot is a baby here

Here is an alligator that found its way to my friends pond. It became fried alligator, alligator stew, alligator gumbo...

netcentric: Last months issue of Outdoor Life had a nice 'tip' on how to remove a leech from your eyeball. Yes...eyeball.

I thought that was nice of them. Had drawings and all, so you would have no problem.

Damn, just, damn.
From now on, no matter what affliction I have in life, I can always think to myself 'at least it's not a leech on my eyeball'.
/shutters

Don't want to go all the way to Florida to wade into a leech-infested swap meet and wrestle an alligator? Visit scenic Fall River, Massachusetts (pic)

Subby, is this what you meant?

GIS for alligator swap meet:

WTF?

this 'pet store owner' is familiar with capturing alligators? and boa constrictors? I'll bet they were both his and had escaped.

VimFuego: Leeches? Fark that!

Came to say leeches near Castle Rock not unlikely

/yay Wil

Dissing Slumerville and Fallout3 River is fun and all, but I see a chance to educate some fools about this interior crocodile alligator we have on our hands.

Link (new window)

Notice the graceful gait and super speed of the interior crocodile alligator.

what_now: keylock71: This place isn't nearly as bad as everyone who doesn't live here (and some that do) like to make it out to be. The wife and I would be happy to buy you a beer and show you around if you ever find yourself down this way.

Well thank you. I take that back- I've never really spent time in Fall River, and you're right: I shouldn't denigrate it. I get pissed when people diss Somerville, so I'm sorry I made a Fall River crack.

I'll check it out!

No problem... I used to get pissed off, but I think that just further reinforces the belief that it's a shiat hole (for some reason) and only conveys my own over-sensitivity over the issue.

These days, I choose to just inform those willing to listen about my hometown.

There are good things happening here and a lot more to our history than just Lizzy Borden, Section 8 housing and a rusty bridge.

The largest naval warship museum in the country is here.

FDR's closest adviser, Louis McHenry Howe is buried in Oak Grove Cemetery.

One of the first battles of the Revolutionary War was fought here - the Battle of Fall River.

A lot of the workplace rights factory workers enjoy today were the results of actions taken here in the textile mills at the turn of the last century.

One of our largest parks, Kennedy Park was designed by the man who designed Central Park in NYC.

We've seen better days, but there are a lot of dedicated folks here trying to turn things around. I don't know much about Somerville, myself, but I assume it's a similar situation as I've heard the term, "Scumerville" bandied about for years.

"From here on out, the herpetologist will help place the animal,"

I hear Paris Hilton is looking for a new purse.

You know, all the times I swam back home in fresh water lakes, ponds, springs, and swamps in Florida, I never, ever got leeches. Never heard of anyone getting any there either. Until I saw the movie Stand By Me, I never knew you could get them while swimming.

Of course, catching an alligator or a snake by surprise wasn't uncommon, especially if you jumped on the varmint. And there's those pesky amoebas that eat your brains. But, nope, no leeches.

/Anyone got a leech stuck on them in Florida?
//Besides the gold-digger kind either.

keylock71: what_now: keylock71: This place isn't nearly as bad as everyone who doesn't live here (and some that do) like to make it out to be. The wife and I would be happy to buy you a beer and show you around if you ever find yourself down this way.

Well thank you. I take that back- I've never really spent time in Fall River, and you're right: I shouldn't denigrate it. I get pissed when people diss Somerville, so I'm sorry I made a Fall River crack.

I'll check it out!

No problem... I used to get pissed off, but I think that just further reinforces the belief that it's a shiat hole (for some reason) and only conveys my own over-sensitivity over the issue.

These days, I choose to just inform those willing to listen about my hometown.

There are good things happening here and a lot more to our history than just Lizzy Borden, Section 8 housing and a rusty bridge.

The largest naval warship museum in the country is here.

FDR's closest adviser, Louis McHenry Howe is buried in Oak Grove Cemetery.

One of the first battles of the Revolutionary War was fought here - the Battle of Fall River.

A lot of the workplace rights factory workers enjoy today were the results of actions taken here in the textile mills at the turn of the last century.

One of our largest parks, Kennedy Park was designed by the man who designed Central Park in NYC.

We've seen better days, but there are a lot of dedicated folks here trying to turn things around. I don't know much about Somerville, myself, but I assume it's a similar situation as I've heard the term, "Scumerville" bandied about for years.

Also birthplace/home to several pro athletes (Jerry Remy, Greg Gagne, Chris Herren - though I call him "pro" sparingly - among others), a Cardinal (Humberto Medeiros), Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf, a Secretary of the Interior (Cornelius Bliss), etc., etc. Oh, and Lizzie and Emeril too.

\And yet again, my lovely little end of the world makes it onto Fark!