Jesus I hate con artists like this. They cause everybody to treat people on the web with such jaded suspicion and contempt. But some of us really need help, you know? Look, I'm just going to throw this out there. Yesterday I was in the shower. I was soaping up my breasts and my nipples and had just bent down to soap my crotch when I heard a crash outside the window. I leaned against the wall and felt my nipples press against the cold tile. Outside, I saw four men with guns. I couldn't help it--I screamed. They saw me. I had to run. I cupped my breasts in my hands and fled. All I could grab was a hand towel. I've been on the run with nothing but a hand towel for two days. I'm hungry and dirty. So dirty. I just found this laptop in a field and am sneaking someone's Wi-Fi while sitting naked on my towel. Please help me. I just need money to buy clothes, some food, a house. Please, you're my only hope.

Then I guess I had better cancel that check.

Does this also mean I wont be getting my money from Nigeria?

/oblig
//dnrtfa

Pocket Ninja, did you drink your breakfast this morning?

/I LOL'd

Wait, there are women on the Internet? When did THAT happen?

And while we are on the subject, I am just absolutely SURE 14-year-old cheerleaders have nothing better to do with their time than talk nasty in chat rooms to silly losers, while dreaming of the day when they can hook up with some 35-year-old doofus with bad breath and a pot belly, who sits in his mama's basement all day long.

Dream on.

Pocket Ninja: Jesus I hate con artists like this. They cause everybody to treat people on the web with such jaded suspicion and contempt. But some of us really need help, you know? Look, I'm just going to throw this out there. Yesterday I was in the shower. I was soaping up my breasts and my nipples and had just bent down to soap my crotch when I heard a crash outside the window. I leaned against the wall and felt my nipples press against the cold tile. Outside, I saw four men with guns. I couldn't help it--I screamed. They saw me. I had to run. I cupped my breasts in my hands and fled. All I could grab was a hand towel. I've been on the run with nothing but a hand towel for two days. I'm hungry and dirty. So dirty. I just found this laptop in a field and am sneaking someone's Wi-Fi while sitting naked on my towel. Please help me. I just need money to buy clothes, some food, a house. Please, you're my only hope.

Sounds legit. I'm in.

my interwebs girlfriend is a nigerian princess who just needs a few thousand dollars to pay the bank transfer fees to get her millions out of the country. seems like a sweet ass deal to me.

/investments
//make them

How dare you blow my Playboy model cover, it was working so well.

Pocket Ninja: Jesus I hate con artists like this. They cause everybody to treat people on the web with such jaded suspicion and contempt. But some of us really need help, you know? Look, I'm just going to throw this out there. Yesterday I was in the shower. I was soaping up my breasts and my nipples and had just bent down to soap my crotch when I heard a crash outside the window. I leaned against the wall and felt my nipples press against the cold tile. Outside, I saw four men with guns. I couldn't help it--I screamed. They saw me. I had to run. I cupped my breasts in my hands and fled. All I could grab was a hand towel. I've been on the run with nothing but a hand towel for two days. I'm hungry and dirty. So dirty. I just found this laptop in a field and am sneaking someone's Wi-Fi while sitting naked on my towel. Please help me. I just need money to buy clothes, some food, a house. Please, you're my only hope.

Done on one, lolz

olddinosaur: And while we are on the subject, I am just absolutely SURE 14-year-old cheerleaders have nothing better to do with their time than talk nasty in chat rooms to silly losers, while dreaming of the day when they can hook up with some 35-year-old doofus with bad breath and a pot belly, who sits in his mama's basement all day long.


well on the bright side - atleast you learned your lesson

Techhell: Wait, there are women on the Internet? When did THAT happen?

It is all a bunch of lies.

littlett's: Techhell: Wait, there are women on the Internet? When did THAT happen?

It is all a bunch of lies.

there are no girls on the internets.

Pocket Ninja: Please, you're my only hope.

No, that would be Obi-Wan Kenobi. He lives two caves down.

flamingboard: littlett's: Techhell: Wait, there are women on the Internet? When did THAT happen?

It is all a bunch of lies.

there are no girls on the internets.

Sad but very true. We are all chatbots.

Pocket Ninja: Jesus I hate con artists like this. They cause everybody to treat people on the web with such jaded suspicion and contempt. But some of us really need help, you know? Look, I'm just going to throw this out there. Yesterday I was in the shower. I was soaping up my breasts and my nipples and had just bent down to soap my crotch when I heard a crash outside the window. I leaned against the wall and felt my nipples press against the cold tile. Outside, I saw four men with guns. I couldn't help it--I screamed. They saw me. I had to run. I cupped my breasts in my hands and fled. All I could grab was a hand towel. I've been on the run with nothing but a hand towel for two days. I'm hungry and dirty. So dirty. I just found this laptop in a field and am sneaking someone's Wi-Fi while sitting naked on my towel. Please help me. I just need money to buy clothes, some food, a house. Please, you're my only hope.

I'm sure you're male, which makes this even funnier because I'm picturing you screaming, cupping your man-boobs and running away in a towel. Not the manliest response, dude, is all I'm saying. Next time, make a dive for your Tec-9 and, you know, bust some caps.

Pocket Ninja, I give you lots of internet dollars. Marry me.

She's got nothing compared to Nancy Nusbaum.

Google search for "nancy nusbaum stopaglaia". Now there's a con artist.

msheda: Then I guess I had better cancel that check.

Does this also mean I wont be getting my money from Nigeria?

Nigeria?
Please.

No Such Agency: Pocket Ninja: Jesus I hate con artists like this. They cause everybody to treat people on the web with such jaded suspicion and contempt. But some of us really need help, you know? Look, I'm just going to throw this out there. Yesterday I was in the shower. I was soaping up my breasts and my nipples and had just bent down to soap my crotch when I heard a crash outside the window. I leaned against the wall and felt my nipples press against the cold tile. Outside, I saw four men with guns. I couldn't help it--I screamed. They saw me. I had to run. I cupped my breasts in my hands and fled. All I could grab was a hand towel. I've been on the run with nothing but a hand towel for two days. I'm hungry and dirty. So dirty. I just found this laptop in a field and am sneaking someone's Wi-Fi while sitting naked on my towel. Please help me. I just need money to buy clothes, some food, a house. Please, you're my only hope.

I'm sure you're male, which makes this even funnier because I'm picturing you screaming, cupping your man-boobs and running away in a towel. Not the manliest response, dude, is all I'm saying. Next time, make a dive for your Tec-9 and, you know, bust some caps.

Just remember to hold the gun "gansta style" while doing so. All the cool kids do it that way.

Just so you farkers know, it is possible to successfully find a relationship on the internets. I now have the best girlfriend ever thanks to a dating website.

/why am I telling you this?
//I'm telling everyone.
///so happy.

My Playboy model daughter with leukemia, Jane Doe, begs to differ.

Pocket Ninja: Good thing you have your towel.
/hoopy

Pocket Ninja: Jesus I hate con artists like this. They cause everybody to treat people on the web with such jaded suspicion and contempt. But some of us really need help, you know? Look, I'm just going to throw this out there. Yesterday I was in the shower. I was soaping up my breasts and my nipples and had just bent down to soap my crotch when I heard a crash outside the window. I leaned against the wall and felt my nipples press against the cold tile. Outside, I saw four men with guns. I couldn't help it--I screamed. They saw me. I had to run. I cupped my breasts in my hands and fled. All I could grab was a hand towel. I've been on the run with nothing but a hand towel for two days. I'm hungry and dirty. So dirty. I just found this laptop in a field and am sneaking someone's Wi-Fi while sitting naked on my towel. Please help me. I just need money to buy clothes, some food, a house. Please, you're my only hope.

Shenanigans, if you were attractive, men would be coming out of the woodwork if you were actually naked.

Pocket Ninja

pssh, pics or it didn't happen.

pugsleythegreat: Pocket Ninja

pssh, pics or it didn't happen.

oh this never ends well. It reads like a gauntlet thrown down for gorgor.

I watched The Time Travelers wife, and cried...............

olapbill

Tell Pocket Ninja I demand satisfaction!
Stand and deliver, the devil may take you yet!

Type40: Just so you farkers know, it is possible to successfully find a relationship on the internets. I now have the best girlfriend ever thanks to a dating website.

/why am I telling you this?
//I'm telling everyone.
///so happy.



is that you, tom?

olapbill: pugsleythegreat: Pocket Ninja

pssh, pics or it didn't happen.

oh this never ends well. It reads like a gauntlet thrown down for gorgor.

Very true, but damn some people never learn, do they?

Pics or it didn't happen

I never assumed as much. That's a pretty big relief though, 'cause really... I don't need that kind of drama in my life.

My nips - $5 per picture. %7.50 to see both. They're perky, like skinny erasers; and they're attached to the firm, supple breasts of a Playboy centerfold.

/ I am thanking You for send money to my akount for to make free my millions from the bank of Nigeria that is holding It.

Pocket Ninja: Jesus I hate con artists like this. They cause everybody to treat people on the web with such jaded suspicion and contempt. But some of us really need help, you know? Look, I'm just going to throw this out there. Yesterday I was in the shower. I was soaping up my breasts and my nipples and had just bent down to soap my crotch when I heard a crash outside the window. I leaned against the wall and felt my nipples press against the cold tile. Outside, I saw four men with guns. I couldn't help it--I screamed. They saw me. I had to run. I cupped my breasts in my hands and fled. All I could grab was a hand towel. I've been on the run with nothing but a hand towel for two days. I'm hungry and dirty. So dirty. I just found this laptop in a field and am sneaking someone's Wi-Fi while sitting naked on my towel. Please help me. I just need money to buy clothes, some food, a house. Please, you're my only hope.

best read.

beats the "i think i just heard someone in my living room...and i am home alone!! help!!1!!!"

flamingboard: my interwebs girlfriend is a nigerian princess who just needs a few thousand dollars to pay the bank transfer fees to get her millions out of the country. seems like a sweet ass deal to me.

/investments
//make them

This is a sweet ass-deal.

maskedloser

Why don't you just give me a TotalFark subscription, the one I've been pining for, and send me a picture of your nips anyway. You can even wear your mask, maskedloser.

So help me if they're man-boobs.

maskedloser: My nips - $5 per picture. %7.50 to see both. They're perky, like skinny erasers; and they're attached to the firm, supple breasts of a Playboy centerfold.

/ I am thanking You for send money to my akount for to make free my millions from the bank of Nigeria that is holding It.

Please attach bank account details, for 'cough' tax purposes 'cough'

flamingboard: littlett's: Techhell: Wait, there are women on the Internet? When did THAT happen?

It is all a bunch of lies.

there are no girls on the internets.

Sad but very true. We are all chatbots.

Error. Error. Duplicate reply with chatbot Littlett's. Resetting chat response list.

/end script

maskedloser: My nips - $5 per picture. %7.50 to see both. They're perky, like skinny erasers; and they're attached to the firm, supple breasts of a Playboy centerfold.

/ I am thanking You for send money to my akount for to make free my millions from the bank of Nigeria that is holding It.

You forgot 'With Thanks To Almighty God, Daddy' for added effect.

Why is this illegal?

You can't lie and have dudes send you money?

Would this be illegal in the States?

Oh no, the AW's are here!

everyone runnn!

/or check and make sure they haven't added any new pictures to their profiles.
//THEN run!

flamingboard: littlett's: Techhell: Wait, there are women on the Internet? When did THAT happen?

It is all a bunch of lies.

there are no girls on the internets.

40-year old guys in sailor moon outfits don't count?

LittleBlondeJug: flamingboard: littlett's: Techhell: Wait, there are women on the Internet? When did THAT happen?

It is all a bunch of lies.

there are no girls on the internets.

Sad but very true. We are all chatbots.

Error. Error. Duplicate reply with chatbot Littlett's. Resetting chat response list.

/end script

heeeheeehee,
i chuckled.

littlett's: Techhell: Wait, there are women on the Internet? When did THAT happen?

It is all a bunch of lies.

Damn. biatch has tucked really well for years!

In before fat bearded naked guy.

In reality, she's not being prosecuted for defrauding men. She's being punished for not being as artful about it as per the Pink Mafia (Sisterhood and Shoes Local 101) requirements.

FrancoFile: In before fat bearded naked guy.

Really, I thought we all were?

Is it still safe to trust Nigerian generals?

pugsleythegreat: Oh no, the AW's are here!

everyone runnn!

/or check and make sure they haven't added any new pictures to their profiles.

Fark is now available in anamorphic wide-screen?

Pocket Ninja: Jesus I hate con artists like this. They cause everybody to treat people on the web with such jaded suspicion and contempt. But some of us really need help, you know? Look, I'm just going to throw this out there. Yesterday I was in the shower. I was soaping up my breasts and my nipples and had just bent down to soap my crotch when I heard a crash outside the window. I leaned against the wall and felt my nipples press against the cold tile. Outside, I saw four men with guns. I couldn't help it--I screamed. They saw me. I had to run. I cupped my breasts in my hands and fled. All I could grab was a hand towel. I've been on the run with nothing but a hand towel for two days. I'm hungry and dirty. So dirty. I just found this laptop in a field and am sneaking someone's Wi-Fi while sitting naked on my towel. Please help me. I just need money to buy clothes, some food, a house. Please, you're my only hope.

Bank Account details in Profile.
If you need my social security number let me know.