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(NYPost) Obvious In another sign the economy is picking up, business in Russian mail-order brides is booming   (nypost.com) divider line 68
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Jacobin 2009-07-19 09:23:50 AM  
To the contrary. Lower maintenance up front until they get settled in and run off with your stuff.

 
BigLuca 2009-07-19 09:24:34 AM  
What you order
www.onewed.com

What you get

 
Bonanza Jellybean 2009-07-19 09:26:41 AM  
She is a Chechnyan prostitute, and you will address her as such.

 
hej 2009-07-19 09:27:43 AM  
I expect great things from this thread.

 
SineSwiper [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-19 09:28:13 AM  
They are just trying to make sure they don't get murdered by Putin.

/damn first-world democracy acts like a third-world dictatorship

 
eraser8 2009-07-19 09:28:54 AM  
They should ship mail-order brides dried -- kinda like Sea Monkeys. That would save lots on postage costs. Then, when they arrive, you just add water and *boom* instant sex life.

 
BigLuca 2009-07-19 09:32:01 AM  
Picture fail AND filter pwnage... I lose.

http://blogs.pitch.com/plog/ugly-man-transvestite-fat-biatch-men-women.jpg

Same picture Link (new window) (sfw)

/way too much typing for a throw away joke...

 
curtreiter 2009-07-19 09:32:31 AM  
Hmmmm....just add vodka

 
BigLuca 2009-07-19 09:34:40 AM  
I give up, going to get coffee...

 
HONDOWAYNE 2009-07-19 09:39:53 AM  
Maybe it`s on the rise because Russian chicks know when to keep their pie holes shut, and of course to do what they are told. The best 5 years with a Russian chick are always better than a life time with a miserable biatch,,,,, I always say.

 
tonesskin [TotalFark] 2009-07-19 09:40:39 AM  
HONDOWAYNE: Maybe it`s on the rise because Russian chicks know when to keep their pie holes shut, and of course to do what they are told. The best 5 years with a Russian chick are always better than a life time with a miserable biatch,,,,, I always say.

You know, commas don't really work that way,,,, just saying.

 
squishedhead 2009-07-19 09:45:27 AM  
I'm glad there are women that want to marry American men. I no longer believe in marriage as an institution - not sure if other American women feel that way, but I do.

 
fortean chicken 2009-07-19 09:53:23 AM  
I actually know a guy who got a mail-order Czech bride. I still can't believe people do this. How can anyone think this is a good idea?

 
dead_dangler [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-19 09:54:15 AM  
fortean chicken: I actually know a guy who got a mail-order Czech bride. I still can't believe people do this. How can anyone think this is a good idea?

The Czech was in the mail?

 
Pay the Man 2009-07-19 09:54:21 AM  
fortean chicken: I actually know a guy who got a mail-order Czech bride. I still can't believe people do this. How can anyone think this is a good idea?

Did they tell him the Czech was in the mail once he'd ordered it?

 
MissDementia 2009-07-19 09:54:22 AM  
squishedhead: I'm glad there are women that want to marry American men. I no longer believe in marriage as an institution - not sure if other American women feel that way, but I do.

I tried that whole "marriage" thing once. Didn't work out to well for me. He went from snuggly-cuddly "I don't care, what do YOU want to do today?" to "We're married now, screw you biatch. Get your own damn coffee and get me a beer while you're up." pretty much overnight.

Now I just collect boy toys so we never leave the "I'll get you a beer while you fix my coffee" happy snuggly-cuddly stage. It works much better that way, I think.

 
krusader3z 2009-07-19 09:56:14 AM  
Where do I sign up?

 
mecaenas 2009-07-19 09:56:15 AM  
BigLuca: Picture fail AND filter pwnage... I lose.

http://blogs.pitch.com/plog/ugly-man-transvestite-fat-biatch-men-women.jpg

Same picture Link (new window) (sfw)

/way too much typing for a throw away joke...


Double FAIL.

 
ambercat 2009-07-19 10:00:12 AM  
squishedhead: I'm glad there are women that want to marry steal the money of American men by convincing them they are not like all those mean American women. I no longer believe in marriage as an institution - not sure if other American women feel that way, but I do.

Believing a mail order bride of any stripe when she tells you that all she wants to do is cook and clean and be subservient to you and have sex with you and look good for you is about as smart as believing that the nice Nigerian prince really needs your help and that you can make thousands of dollars a week working out of your home.

Also see: There's no such thing as a free lunch, and if it looks too good to be true, IT PROBABLY IS.

 
violetvolume 2009-07-19 10:00:24 AM  
And they say the gays are ruining the sanctity of marriage!

 
eraser8 2009-07-19 10:00:42 AM  
mecaenas: BigLuca: Picture fail AND filter pwnage... I lose.

http://blogs.pitch.com/plog/ugly-man-transvestite-fat-biatch-men-women.jpg

Same picture Link (new window) (sfw)

/way too much typing for a throw away joke...

Double FAIL.


216.77.188.54

 
cats4rent 2009-07-19 10:03:08 AM  
i have a friend who wouldn't listen to reason, who has spent every dime he had on some mysterious russian girl that has failed to show up here going on four months now.

 
dead_dangler [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-19 10:04:45 AM  
I know a guy who's married to a mail order bride. He said they're everything he was lead to believe and more. The only thing they lack? An undeserved sense of entitlement.

 
Pollexabator 2009-07-19 10:06:34 AM  
Wait, I'm confused. You pay HER...? Why would ANYONE agree to that? If you want US citizenship you're going to have to pay me.

/that's the way it's done for women in Central and South American sham marriages
//or so I've heard

 
Pay the Man 2009-07-19 10:08:34 AM  
Pollexabator: Wait, I'm confused. You pay HER...? Why would ANYONE agree to that? If you want US citizenship you're going to have to pay me.

/that's the way it's done for women in Central and South American sham marriages
//or so I've heard


Do they pay in tacos, or tequila?

 
tcaptain 2009-07-19 10:10:17 AM  
HONDOWAYNE: Maybe it`s on the rise because Russian chicks know when to keep their pie holes shut, and of course to do what they are told. The best 5 years with a Russian chick are always better than a life time with a miserable biatch,,,,, I always say.

Wow...you don't know many russian women do you?

 
Jimmy Devil Rocket Science 2009-07-19 10:11:52 AM  
FTFA: One Sheepshead Bay man said he gets offers all the time from marriage brokers.

"I get calls asking me to marry one of these girls every other week," said the Ukrainian immigrant, who came to Brooklyn in 1975 and is a US citizen.

"It's easy money," he said. "And the girls are really hot." [...]

A marriage broker contacted by a Post reporter posing as a green-card seeker walked him through the process.

The broker said the marriage would run the reporter $31,500 in cash.

Of that total, $25,000 would go to the fiancée -- with $10,000 given up front and $15,000 paid after the green-card interview with Citizenship and Immigration Services. The remaining $6,500 would go to the agency for paperwork.

The broker picks a "suitable" match from their database of eligible US citizens. Then the couple goes to City Hall for a marriage license.


I don't know about the rest of you, but twenty five grand plus a hot Russian sounds like a pretty sweet deal.

 
dofus 2009-07-19 10:12:23 AM  
dead_dangler: The Czech was in the male?

They're doing it wrong

 
unfarkingbelievable 2009-07-19 10:28:04 AM  
I wish someone would put an end to these stinky, unwashed Russian/Czech/whatever green-card whores soiling our country.

 
Rose Red 2009-07-19 10:32:23 AM  
I know someone who did this and she made him MISERABLE.

 
altinos 2009-07-19 10:33:20 AM  
I worked with two people who had mail order Russian brides. One, I was convinced she would run off as soon as the honeymoon was over. The other, I'm convinced she actually did love him and wanted to stay with him.

Even in this economy, it's probably better than what they came from.

 
replaced by golf cart 2009-07-19 10:36:00 AM  
I'm on my third. Keep 'em coming.

 
dead_dangler [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-19 10:37:28 AM  
It's funny that a number of Farkettes are trying desperately to convince us that mail order brides are a bad idea. What are you afraid of, ladies?

 
hamiltonjdavid [TotalFark] 2009-07-19 10:42:41 AM  
Rose Red: I know someone who did this and she made him MISERABLE.

Sounds like a legitimate marriage to me.

 
tonesskin [TotalFark] 2009-07-19 10:46:00 AM  
Rose Red: I know someone who did this and she made him MISERABLE.

I know someone who did this and they are happily married after 18 years. Oh, anecdotes are fun!

 
InfamousBLT 2009-07-19 10:50:17 AM  
dead_dangler: It's funny that a number of Farkettes are trying desperately to convince us that mail order brides are a bad idea. What are you afraid of, ladies?

They are afraid that we are finally wising up to the truth, that American women are mostly fat obnoxious biatches who aren't worth the effort it takes to get what little we do actually get out of them.

/recently single
//you can't tell can you?

 
Disorganized 2009-07-19 10:59:10 AM  
//She is a Chechnyan prostitute, and you will address her as such.

Came for the ATHF. Leaving Satisfied.

 
squishedhead 2009-07-19 11:12:08 AM  
InfamousBLT: dead_dangler: It's funny that a number of Farkettes are trying desperately to convince us that mail order brides are a bad idea. What are you afraid of, ladies?

They are afraid that we are finally wising up to the truth, that American womenmen are mostly fat obnoxious biatchespricks who aren't worth the effort it takes to get what little we do actually get out of them.

/recently single
//you can't tell can you?


Likewise!

/not so recently single
//learned my lesson

 
Corneliusm 2009-07-19 11:26:43 AM  
cats4rent: i have a friend who wouldn't listen to reason, who has spent every dime he had on some mysterious russian girl that has failed to show up here going on four months now.

He's doing it wrong. They're supposed to pay him, not the other way around.

/so I've heard

 
missmez [TotalFark] 2009-07-19 11:37:31 AM  
I don't know anyone who married a mail-order bride, but I did recently move to a neighborhood with tons of Russian immigrants. Now that its hot and everyone leaves their windows open, come evening the arguments are frequent and intense.

I'd be annoyed but my dogs are kind of barky and no one ever complains about that.

/sometimes they throw each other's stuff out their windows, which is funny

 
No Such Agency 2009-07-19 11:37:37 AM  
Yeaaaaah, I thought everyone knew that $25,000 later, the girl either never appears, or you come home four months after the wedding to find her shiny-suit-wearing "cousins" Nikolai and Sergei cutting coke on your coffee table.

How hard up do you have to BE to get involved in a scheme like this anyway? The women, I can't blame at all. Russia is a dangerous, corrupt dictatorship after all and I'd suck a lot of dick myself to get out if I lived there. The Western men... yeah they're not so much looking for a "wife" as a "full-time personal prostitute". So really, they deserve to get fleeced.

 
remember the topos 2009-07-19 11:42:23 AM  
It's just like auto market. The quality of American models has gone downhill in recent years, so we start importing. Makes sense to me.

 
missmez [TotalFark] 2009-07-19 11:44:29 AM  
dead_dangler: It's funny that a number of Farkettes are trying desperately to convince us that mail order brides are a bad idea. What are you afraid of, ladies?

Because we deep down we are all patriots. If you're going to get rolled by a chick way out of your league, we'd prefer it was an American chick, goddammit.

 
Rip Dashrock 2009-07-19 11:46:08 AM  
American, foreign, dosen't matter. Once the new car smell wears off, it's all down hill. Nature of the beast.

 
dead_dangler [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-19 11:47:13 AM  
No Such Agency: Yeaaaaah, I thought everyone knew that $25,000 later, the girl either never appears, or you come home four months after the wedding to find her shiny-suit-wearing "cousins" Nikolai and Sergei cutting coke on your coffee table.

How hard up do you have to BE to get involved in a scheme like this anyway? The women, I can't blame at all. Russia is a dangerous, corrupt dictatorship after all and I'd suck a lot of dick myself to get out if I lived there. The Western men... yeah they're not so much looking for a "wife" as a "full-time personal prostitute". So really, they deserve to get fleeced.


That's not true. I know several men who have married mail order brides and they're quite happy with them (and the wives are quite happy too). And in spite of your obvious hatred of "Western men", they're not all looking for a "full-time personal prostitute" and more than "Western women" are self-entitled harpies looking for "a full-time bank machine".

 
bahr [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-19 11:56:45 AM  
Russian women = too dangerous, as has been stated here. If I were looking afresh, I'd direct my attention toward South America and southeast Asia.

 
altinos 2009-07-19 11:58:46 AM  
dead_dangler: It's funny that a number of Farkettes are trying desperately to convince us that mail order brides are a bad idea. What are you afraid of, ladies?

Same reason they hate prostitution and strip clubs. They hate competition, and want to corner the market.

:)

 
atlas spanked 2009-07-19 12:46:40 PM  
Hey Russian mail order can't be any worse than the all-too-often spoiled, whiny, entitled, chip-on-the-shoulder American chick.

/The world is flat.

 
orclover 2009-07-19 12:48:06 PM  
Got a buddy who did this a few years ago. This is a man who's life is a roadmap of bad choices causing him pain and aggrivation, his life a daily lesson to the rest of us on what not to do if you want to stay sane.

It was the worst decision of his life. It was like watching a man dry swallow molten lava while everyone was pleading with him to stop, bad idea friend!

Before and after thier divorce she pretty much ruined what was left of his sad life. Years later and they are still in litigation for stupid things. She owns most of his stuff and half his ass for the next 15 years.

She slept with him. Twice. In 2 years.

 
dead_dangler [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-19 12:49:46 PM  
orclover: Got a buddy who did this a few years ago. This is a man who's life is a roadmap of bad choices causing him pain and aggrivation, his life a daily lesson to the rest of us on what not to do if you want to stay sane.

It was the worst decision of his life. It was like watching a man dry swallow molten lava while everyone was pleading with him to stop, bad idea friend!

Before and after thier divorce she pretty much ruined what was left of his sad life. Years later and they are still in litigation for stupid things. She owns most of his stuff and half his ass for the next 15 years.

She slept with him. Twice. In 2 years.


And this would be different if he married a western woman, how?

 
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