I'm just back to work after my second son was born. I was off for 3 weeks. My wife used 1 month of her vacation time to pad out her 1 year maternity/parental leave to 13 months. Her work also tops her up to 86% of her normal pay. EI pays only about $790 every 2 weeks which is pretty useless, so the top up is fantastic.

/Canadian

The Icelander: Employees:

I mock you.

I mock your business casual attire.

I mock your ID badges.

I mock your paid time off.

I mock you being controlled by someone else.

I mock you.

Sincerely,
A self-employed person.

\P.S. - MOCK.

Having done both, I find your perspective really amusing.

Mock my business casual attire - attire I find more comfortable than the dressing up I had to do when dealing with clients when I was self-employed.

Mock my id badge - which is a HUGE impact to my life. Right.

Mock my paid time off - even though you know that every day you don't work is a day your business makes $0. zip. Nada. Vacations are lots of fun when you realize that your income has absolutely halted, and that if something with your business goes wrong you may have to end your vacation right then and there.

Mock my being controlled by someone else - if by controlled you mean given general direction about what tasks they'll give me money to complete, while assuming all financial and legal risk. As compared to before, when my financial future was on the line.

Self-employment works well for some people. Others not so much. My stress plummetted when I shut down my business and went corporate, and hasn't come close to that level since.

Have fun with your mocking, though. You need that outlet, huh?

brainiac-dumdum: Men absolutely need more parental leave after the birth or adoption of a child. Unfortunately, the traditional role of women being considered the "more natural" parent is a stereotype that harms women in the workplace and harms men by belittling their parental contribution. The Patriarchy harms men as well as women.

Word.

dfenstrate:

Well, yes, things are good for you. My question was who can't be employed, because the generous leave benefits you enjoyed had to be paid for?

It's good you and your industry are doing well- but what about more marginal industries subject to the same regulations, but who have much smaller profit margins?

Who isn't getting employed so you and your countrymen can enjoy those benefits?

This is a boring line of questioning, but I'll give you an answer.

Usually it is the people not willing to learn new skills and people with dependency problems, and those with social issues that have difficulties.

As with the US, there is discrimination. Those that look past discrimination, they usually get better employees at a lower price, oddly enough. Those that don't employ the same ole same ole.

Then there is the whole royalty/connected to the right family thing. It's similar to the "good ole boy" network in the US.

But, as you might surmise, the people who want a job, find one, the ones that don't don't. The ones that can't (incapable, ie, handicapped, etc.) find a job are taken care of by society.

Unfortunately, like CA in the 60's, mentally ill people seem to be released on the streets. That means you see a few homeless people around. However, it is nothing compared to the number of homeless people, especially without medical care or education opportunities, found in the US.

Why don't you try living abroad for a year or two in a different country? It could provide you the answers you are looking for...

How do you get it to last for 15 seconds?

Playerslight: Speaking as a father of two young kids, I gotta say that heading back to work for an eight-hour break everyday is one of the perks of being a father. I'm (un)lucky enough to have a flexible job that allows me to be home for a couple hours in the morning with them and back early enough to help with dinner and putting them to bed, but that time in the office when all I have to deal with is phone calls and emails and reports and meetings is pure relaxation gold.

What I would have considered "work" before having kids is a delightful break from what I now realize to be real work.

THIS!! My boss offered me a laptop in case I wanted to stay home and get some work done and I said "Are you kidding? I'll be sneaking in for some extra hours just for a break"

The mothers got shafted to make the babies in the first place, so it's only fair.

The Voice of Doom: And there's a law that protects against wages that are against public policy, i.e. they can't be too low compared to what's considered the "usual pay" for the same work in that area (like paying 2 bucks if everyone else gets 6-8 for doing the same things).

At that point its more profitable to just sit around and get harz 4..

LousyTourist: How do you get it to last for 15 seconds?

I usually break for a bout of coughing and wheezing halfway through.

trixter_nl: the real question is did you use the new coversheet on your tps reports.

PC LOAD LETTER. WHAT THE FARK IS THAT?

SuperChuck: THIS!! My boss offered me a laptop in case I wanted to stay home and get some work done and I said "Are you kidding? I'll be sneaking in for some extra hours just for a break"

My boss asked if I wanted to take a month of paternity leave and I think I actually snerked.

I love the little devils and I help out as much as I possibly can, but my two-year-old knows that he has to play on his own during the day. Daddy will play with him when he's home from work. If I was home from work for a month he'd become so dependent and needy it'd take weeks of beatings to make him independent again.

I'd definitely get in shape chasing him 10 hours a day, however. It might be worth the 50% paycut.

As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

brainiac-dumdum: vertiaset: Your statement was typical Fark. Farkers always go for the attack first. It is a odd aspect of the culture of this forum but I am used to it.

I bet, you've been posting for over a month now.

I think you just proved him right

When my second child was born, my boss begged me to come back to work that night to run our month end reports (something he could have done). And like an idiot, I drove an hour and 15 minutes into work, ran the reports, drove back to the hospital to be with my wife and child, drove back to work early in the morning, was forced to stay until noon, drove back to the hospital, came back to work that afternoon to run the daily reports. My wife is now due any day with our third child (and our first son). When we head up to the hospital (same one), I'm staying there. He can run the reports himself.

AbbeySomeone: Abbey "Smells a lawsuit" Someone

Greater chances of lawsuits with sympathetic plaintiffs is yet another reason not to hire a woman, particularly a woman with children. Sure you go through all the motions to create weasonable doubt but never actually go through with it.

Yes, just remember those 15 seconds of baby making...



Or look at this picture of a sandwich. Whatever.

UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

Congratulations! We had our first in June.

Sleep now. Fark your hobbies. SLEEP NOW!! You'll miss it once the little one's here.

UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

mcsestretch: UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

Congratulations! We had our first in June.

Sleep now. Fark your hobbies. SLEEP NOW!! You'll miss it once the little one's here.

I'd say fark the wife and ignore your hobbies. Sleep is important, but you can't bank it so really, what's the use? I'd strongly suggest doing lots of stuff as a couple, maybe even spontaneously. Go to movies, shows, dinner, romantic walks, long drives through the country, etc as much as you possibly can from now until the new year. Because with the exception of the few days a year the grandparents take the kids, that'll be much more difficult in January.

powerserge
There was a woman at where I work recently who just went on paid leave of absence, because she is pregnant. This upsets me, getting pregnant in the 21th century is a fully controllable thing, yeah accidents happen, but to be paid because she made a choice to keep this baby, screw that. You wanna have kids you do it on your time.

I'm all for parental leave... as long as everyone else is likewise entitled to multiple months of paid leave for their respective lifestyle decisions.

rat_creature: I'm all for parental leave... as long as everyone else is likewise entitled to multiple months of paid leave for their respective lifestyle decisions.

You should run for congress and fight to have that implemented. Or, conversely, continue to anonymously post passive-aggressive morally-superior tripe on internet message boards.

Playerslight: UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

mcsestretch: UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

Congratulations! We had our first in June.

Sleep now. Fark your hobbies. SLEEP NOW!! You'll miss it once the little one's here.

I'd say fark the wife and ignore your hobbies. Sleep is important, but you can't bank it so really, what's the use? I'd strongly suggest doing lots of stuff as a couple, maybe even spontaneously. Go to movies, shows, dinner, romantic walks, long drives through the country, etc as much as you possibly can from now until the new year. Because with the exception of the few days a year the grandparents take the kids, that'll be much more difficult in January.

A ZILLION TIMES THIS!

djkutch: Solid State Vittles: Whatever, subby, I can go for almost TWICE that long.

HAHA! I'm a member of the Minute Club.

ha, 3 minute club member.

By the way, speaking of sex and the miracle of birth and all that, anyone have that iconic picture of a grilled cheese sandwich that evokes grandma's sexy time? Did a GIS and nothing.

I have to email it to someone who thought the sandwich above was disgusting.

The prude.

/They're not a Farker, obviously

The Icelander: Employees:

I mock you.

I mock your business casual attire.

I mock your ID badges.

I mock your paid time off.

I mock you being controlled by someone else.

I mock you.

Sincerely,
A self-employed person.

\P.S. - MOCK.

right on. it gets lonely at the top but you're the only one up there
/have pc repair buisness
//because i can

mwinberry: When my second child was born, my boss begged me to come back to work that night to run our month end reports (something he could have done). And like an idiot, I drove an hour and 15 minutes into work, ran the reports, drove back to the hospital to be with my wife and child, drove back to work early in the morning, was forced to stay until noon, drove back to the hospital, came back to work that afternoon to run the daily reports. My wife is now due any day with our third child (and our first son). When we head up to the hospital (same one), I'm staying there. He can run the reports himself.

Meh. When we had our kids we delivered at the hospital Mr. Chick works at. (He's in IT there) So we had his boss, his boss's boss and everyone else from his department in the delivery room asking him questions about work.

sotua: Playerslight: UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

mcsestretch: UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

Congratulations! We had our first in June.

Sleep now. Fark your hobbies. SLEEP NOW!! You'll miss it once the little one's here.

I'd say fark the wife and ignore your hobbies. Sleep is important, but you can't bank it so really, what's the use? I'd strongly suggest doing lots of stuff as a couple, maybe even spontaneously. Go to movies, shows, dinner, romantic walks, long drives through the country, etc as much as you possibly can from now until the new year. Because with the exception of the few days a year the grandparents take the kids, that'll be much more difficult in January.

A ZILLION TIMES THIS!

LOL! Thanks everyone, I'll keep that in mind. Luckily, the grandparents live close (~45 minutes), so we could have them watch the baby, but that won't be for a little bit.

/Glad I have 4 weeks of vacation starting January 1 :)

UHC2005: sotua: Playerslight: UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

mcsestretch: UHC2005: As a person whose wife is due in January with our first, I'm really getting a kick (in the nuts) out of these replies... :)

Congratulations! We had our first in June.

Sleep now. Fark your hobbies. SLEEP NOW!! You'll miss it once the little one's here.

I'd say fark the wife and ignore your hobbies. Sleep is important, but you can't bank it so really, what's the use? I'd strongly suggest doing lots of stuff as a couple, maybe even spontaneously. Go to movies, shows, dinner, romantic walks, long drives through the country, etc as much as you possibly can from now until the new year. Because with the exception of the few days a year the grandparents take the kids, that'll be much more difficult in January.

A ZILLION TIMES THIS!

LOL! Thanks everyone, I'll keep that in mind. Luckily, the grandparents live close (~45 minutes), so we could have them watch the baby, but that won't be for a little bit.

/Glad I have 4 weeks of vacation starting January 1 :)

Congrats. I'd take that advice. Be a couple now, because you won't get a chance later.

//parent of two delightful chicklets.

Playerslight
You should run for congress and fight to have that implemented. Or, conversely, continue to anonymously post passive-aggressive morally-superior tripe on internet message boards.

You ought to post a rebuttal backed by valid arguments explaining why you disagree. Or, conversely, continue to anonymously resort to passive-aggressive ad-hominem attacks on internet message boards.

Seriously, though. It is not my intent to undermine the importance of paternity leave with regards to the welfare of the child - kids do better as adults the more active their parents' roles in raising them are, and, yes, a certain amount of replacement (though probably not as much as we're seeing) is necessary for the continuation of our species and progress of society. However, children come into the world solely by the decisions of their parents to have them, and it makes no sense to make employers fund employees for certain life decisions and not for others. It makes no difference to a company if an employee takes a year off to bear and raise a baby or to nip off to the steppes to study Buryat shamanism (and in the second case, the company won't even have to extend its share of offered health insurance premiums to cover a new dependent).
And, no, I admittedly do not have some awesome solution to propose here. Perhaps if the government were to cover parental leave costs for a company (for, say, up to the replacement level of two kids per family), since it is ultimately the government which benefits from welcoming new future taxpayers... far from a perfect idea (higher taxes and othersuch at the very least), but perhaps a bit more fair.

rat_creature
It is not my intent to undermine the importance of paternity leave

Whoops, make that parental leave. Sorry, still caffeinating...

vertiaset:
That little cone headed girl is now 15, bright, beautiful and everything I could have wished for.
You're from France, aren't you?

/meepps

Interesting that in a country that regularly passes idiotic legislation "for the children" and claims to be so family friendly, family oriented, family family family family, blah blah blah, that people still get so little time off to have/care for a new infant.

Makes our supposed commitment to children/parenthood/families look like something of a mockery. I wonder when either the Democrats or the Republicans are going to do something about that, rather than making sure we don't see a nipple during the Super Bowl halftime show or hear the word "fark" on an awards show.

RembrandtQEinstein: Never ever hire a woman younger than 40, or a woman older than 40 with young kids.

And some people, like dfenstrate, wonder why working folks view employers as assholes...

theoriginalslash: Interesting that in a country that regularly passes idiotic legislation "for the children" and claims to be so family friendly, family oriented, family family family family, blah blah blah, that people still get so little time off to have/care for a new infant.

Makes our supposed commitment to children/parenthood/families look like something of a mockery. I wonder when either the Democrats or the Republicans are going to do something about that, rather than making sure we don't see a nipple during the Super Bowl halftime show or hear the word "fark" on an awards show.

Let me explain it to you: freaking out over halftime football events is cheap. Putting your money where your mouth is, by supporting working fathers and mothers, is expensive. Controlling other people's sex lives is relatively cheap, too, and provides vicarious thrills for people who don't have a sex life or keep it on the down low.

OTOH, I have an employer that actually supports parents, and gives them parental leave for both childbirth and adoption. For moms AND dads. Good for them!

RembrandtQEinstein: AbbeySomeone: Abbey "Smells a lawsuit" Someone

Greater chances of lawsuits with sympathetic plaintiffs is yet another reason not to hire a woman, particularly a woman with children. Sure you go through all the motions to create weasonable doubt but never actually go through with it.


Asthmatic doubt?

I just finished my five weeks of paid paternity leave, so I'm getting a kick out of those replies...

/First day back at work
//1503 e-mails in the inbox. Dammit.

rat_creature: You ought to post a rebuttal backed by valid arguments explaining why you disagree. Or, conversely, continue to anonymously resort to passive-aggressive ad-hominem attacks on internet message boards.

The latter, of course.

I didn't respond with an argument because as a society we have accepted that childbirth and rearing is a necessary component to advancing civilization, whereas your three-month paid surfing trip may not be. But even that's not completely true, as there are certainly employers who provide for paid and unpaid sabbaticals which could be used for whatever ends you deem necessary.

To provide for mandatory extension of the benefit provided to parent to non-parents would require popular support, hence my 'congress' comment. Unless you don't actually want to change the rules and instead just wanted a debate, in which case this entire discussion is a little masturbatory.

Bobby Teenager: Ugh, babies. They're like hairless cats, but at least cats have the decency to shiat in a box.

This is, in all seriousness, exactly how I feel about children.

/doing my part not to overpopulate the planet

brainiac-dumdum: Men are not given enough credit for their nurturing side, and that's a shame.

This, italicized, bolded, underlined, embiggened enough to be seen from space.

My husband just ended his parental leave. He went on it in the first place because well... he could, but because our dr. recommended it because with our first child, I had terrible post partum depression, and he couldn't get time off then. So this time, he got to stay home for 9 months after our son was born, which I believe is the reason (or a big reason) why I'm not like I was last time. I couldn't even leave the house last time because I had agoraphobia. He went back to work in june, and got laid off the next day (thanks, boss) because of a "lack of work", so now he's back on EI until september. yay.

If he had simply impregnated me, and had say, some interest in the kid, but we didn't live together, then there is no way he would get parental leave (or at least he shouldnt). its there so you can stay home and take care of the kid. its not a vacation.

ciocia: Let me explain it to you: freaking out over halftime football events is cheap. Putting your money where your mouth is, by supporting working fathers and mothers, is expensive. Controlling other people's sex lives is relatively cheap, too, and provides vicarious thrills for people who don't have a sex life or keep it on the down low.

You forgot to mention that the motto of the United States used to be "E Pluribus Unum", then "In God We Trust" in the 50s, now we have a number of mottoes to choose from:

Not In My Backyard
Do As I Say, Not As I Do
God Said, It, I Believe It, That Settles It
Fark You

And my personal favorite:

A Conservative Is Someone Who Has No Moral Qualms About Other People Suffering For His Principles.

Kinda late to the party BUT... My husband lucked out. His name is Robin, so they took one look at his name, and gave him 6 weeks maternity leave with BOTH our babies. He said it was one of the best experiences, and 10 years later, he is still a hands on father, and the kids adores him.

aybara: My wife got one month maternity paid. She had to eat up vacation time to extend it.

I got nothing. I took two weeks just to be there to help out for the first kid.

I've got a seven-week-old, so I'm really not getting a kick out of these replies. My company is incredibly stingy with pay and vacation. They had a shutdown last Xmas that required me to take vacation from this year to cover last year. We have another shutdown this Xmas. This means I've got about 8 days to use for the entire year. I took a week off when my son was born. Now I have 3 days left. Of course, there's the Family Medical Leave Act, which allows me 12 weeks unpaid w/o losing my job, but it's unpaid. My wife is taking only 8 weeks FMLA (also unpaid). We just can't afford to take any more time unpaid. I've often wondered if any of the lawmakers have kids, because the whole FMLA is a farking joke. Yes, take time out to lay the proper foundation for America's next generation, but bend over and take it in the arse to do so. Something just doesn't seem right. No wonder kids become bratty shiats these days...

I want to work for Rembrandt. I hate carrying other employees, and their children, and all the other issues that come along with both.

Grackel: I want to work for Rembrandt. I hate carrying other employees, and their children, and all the other issues that come along with both.

You know what? You may be sorry for that someday. I am unmarried and childless, but my employer's generous benefits help me care for my mother, and helped when dad was alive and ailing. Unless you hatched from an egg, family leave benefits are your friend.