in other news, lamps and end tables are deadly weapons

Megain: in other news, lamps and end tables are deadly weapons

Oh, see, I went a completely different direction assuming what the deadly weapon was.

Pocket Ninja: Megain: in other news, lamps and end tables are deadly weapons

Oh, see, I went a completely different direction assuming what the deadly weapon was.

heh - me too. that's why i wanted to find out what it really was

He appears to be taking it in stride.

Yes, penis went there, there and there.

Lowell was charged with assault with a deadly weapon.

"Officer, I swear, his penis was THIS big!"

Dufus: Lowell was charged with assault with a deadly weapon.

"Officer, I swear, his penis was THIS big!"

Shut UP, Ma!

/That's a thought that'll fester.

If this is not considered appropriate behavior, I should have been locked up years ago.

Did she have to click to enlarge?

Lowell, of Prunedale, is accused of assaulting his roommate and then chasing his landlord around the home, while nude, and demanding oral sex from her, deputies said.

I bet he can really move.

Megain: in other news, lamps and end tables are deadly weapons

FTA:
Lowell kicked and damaged a rear door window, Irons said, then began to bite the steel window frame.

Biting a steel window frame? Damn. Meth must be a hell of a drug.

That is a crime?

:P (|)

...

!!! :P (|) !!!!


AAAARRGGHHHH!!!

Yes. Yes, I know what you mean. I'm afraid he's suffering from what we doctors call whooping cough. That is, the failure of the autonomic nervous section of the brain to deal with the nerve impulses that enable you and I to retain some facts and eliminate others.

\obscure?

Philly_gp: That is a crime?

Only if she says 'no,' and as the saying goes, nothing turns a 'no' to a 'yes' like a big ol' toke of crystal meth.

vertiaset: So, he was a shark?

I LOLed.

Fart_Machine: Did she have to click to enlarge?

Oh, SNAP!

/you so went there
//newsletter, et. al.

DEMANDED????

maybe if he was polite, and asked--even adding please, she may have provided that which what he wanted.

remember, good manners cost nothing.

Was it this landlady?



/Ewwwwwww.

Tony Baloney: Yes. Yes, I know what you mean. I'm afraid he's suffering from what we doctors call whooping cough. That is, the failure of the autonomic nervous section of the brain to deal with the nerve impulses that enable you and I to retain some facts and eliminate others.

\obscure?

Oh PLEASE. Nothing from Monty Python's "Matching Tie and Handkerchief" is going to be obscure on Fark. You'll have to do better than that.

"Oh Come Come On..I've Got Your KNICKERS!!!!"

One of my favorite skits of all time...

vertiaset: So, he was a shark?

I'm a tenant
I'm a tenant
suck my dick
I'm a tenant

So is this his bottom or hasn't he had enough yet?

/obscure?

Meth? The HELL you say!!

We need to read his rental agreement to find out if said sexual demands were a part of the rent. Maybe she reneged.

My god, does he look happy or what?



And no, there is nothing else to do in Prunedale, except meth and your unwilling roomies.

Ugh....I need to go to bed.

Once more:

Was it this landlady?



/Ewwwwwww.

Gyrfalcon: My god, does he look happy or what?



And no, there is nothing else to do in Prunedale, except meth and your unwilling roomies.

UFIA?

/got nuthin'

What is it about good sex that makes me have to crap? You really jarred something loose tiger.

Not amused.

Thanks officer OHMYGODACAMERA! LETME TAKEITAPART ANDCLEANALLTHE PARTS OOO ORANGEJUMPSUITSAWESOME --

He's had a rough go of it ever since Stanley Spadowski's Funhouse got cancelled

damaged a rear door window

/just saying

Gyrfalcon: My god, does he look happy or what?



And no, there is nothing else to do in Prunedale, except meth and your unwilling roomies.

I see that Gyrfalcon has been to Prunedale, on behalf of Redneck California I apologize.

Approves

"was found to be under the influence of methamphetamine"

Gee... ya think???

/an end table definitely qualifies as a deadly weapon
//ouch

MY GOD, IT'S FULL OF STARS

/he's got the same look as the head-holding mugshot
//yeah, you know the one I mean

Mel Gibson arrested again? At least he shaved.

Prunedale?

I have to say, today's suspect looks like a cross between Mike Rowe and Henry Rollins.

Alright, it's official, this guy is almost as good as Pat Tribett.

vertiaset: Tweakers. Man, what a group.

Whenever you hear of a mother locking her kids in the trunk while she is gone for hours at a time ... tweaker.

Five kids in a roach infested apartment living on stale Cheerios? Tweaker.

Guy steals a tank and runs down cops? Tweaker.

Guy electrocuted when stealing copper wire from a live power substation? Tweaker.

They have a particular look and smell, scabby parchment skin, brittle frizzed hair, gaunt features, odd bulging eyes, and horrible teeth and gums.

Meth is a drug that consumes its abusers from the inside out like some kind of alien parasite.

Meth...it's a hell of a drug.

Deadly weapon?

His dick was a monster?

/props to Frankie Z

"oh yeah it goes there!"

He kinda looks like he is getting his request.

P.S.
Dad?

/Understands

All this blaming meth! Are we sure it's not simply Ambien?

"Lowell was charged with assault with a deadly weapon. "

I was feeling all better than him until I read that.

Now I just feel inadequate.

/not rly

In his defense, it ain't gonna suck itself.

srtpointman: In his defense, it ain't gonna suck itself.

Hey, you might have a point here.

I will never understand why people touch certain drugs. Meth? Crack? Honestly, when does that sound like a good idea?

Assault with a deadly weapon or assault with a dead weapon??

picturescrazy

I will never understand why people touch certain drugs. Meth? Crack? Honestly, when does that sound like a good idea?

Oh, i don't know. Maybe when you have been snorting blow for about three days straight and it is just not doing it for you anymore.

Or maybe your nose is so clogged up that all that will work is your lungs?

/Not that i would know.
//NTTIAWWT

Which one of girls did not date someone like that in our past

Ewwww!!!

Did it work? Was alcohol involved?

The_Sponge: Was it this landlady?



/Ewwwwwww.

Her lips said no, but her eyes said YES...yes...yes...

FTFA: Officers then used a stun gun to prevent Lowell from further injuring himself, sheriff's officials said.

That sentence made me giggle.

Ed Finnerty: FTFA: Officers then used a stun gun to prevent Lowell from further injuring himself, sheriff's officials said.

That sentence made me giggle.

Yeah. He's lucky he wasn't *really* hurting himself, or they might have been forced to shoot him to protect him.

picturescrazy: I will never understand why people touch certain drugs. Meth? Crack? Honestly, when does that sound like a good idea?

Severe depression, hopelessness. For some people, drugs like that are a way to postpone suicide.

Showed up for the obvious "penis goes where?" caption.

It took a while, but did not leave disappointed.

phlegmmo: Lowell, of Prunedale, is accused of assaulting his roommate and then chasing his landlord around the home, while nude, and demanding oral sex from her, deputies said.

I bet he can really move.

Prunes, Prunes, the magical fruit...

...the more you eat, the more you poop!

Am I the only one who hears Yakety Sax when picturing this?

Don't judge me. What was I supposed to do??? Biatch wouldn't fix my toilet.

They tazed him so 'he wouldnt hurt himself', yeah lol..... hahahahahaha

Oh_Enough_Already: Meth is a Hell of a Drug.

Wow, that's sadly accurate.

mrsinatra: Am I the only one who hears Yakety Sax when picturing this?

TRU' DAT!

/I miss Benny Hill.
//Slashes go this way.

Officers then used a stun gun to prevent Lowell from further injuring himself because it was funny, sherrif's officials said.

gavnook: picturescrazy: I will never understand why people touch certain drugs. Meth? Crack? Honestly, when does that sound like a good idea?

Severe depression, hopelessness. For some people, drugs like that are a way to postpone suicide.

I was an avid meth user for about 10 years, and can attest to this. This drug changes your brain. No matter how bad everything starts to go, your meth soaked brain convinces you that it's anybody's fault but your own, and the only thing that seems to allow any semblance of happiness is, .... wait for it, .... MORE METH! Once you're good and into this drug, quitting is a nightmare. Suicide seemed far better than the 2 weeks of sleep, eat, sleep, take a dump, sleep, groan, sleep, get woken up by someone yelling at you as to why you're sleeping so much, scream, sleep cycle that is meth withdrawal. Sadly, once you actually quit, you'll likely have dreams about using the drug for the rest of your life. Oh well, better than losing your teeth along with everything that ever made you truly happy.
\clean for 2 years now
\\kept my teeth somehow
\\\meth is a HELL of a life

Came here for the landlady from Kingpin.

Left... well, not "satisfied". It's impossible to be satisfied when her gruesome visage is present on the screen. *shudders*