PapermonkeyExpress: mediablitz

www.law.state.ak.us

She was referencing the national equivalent of what she has in Alaska.

But you KNEW that, amirite?

There is no national equivalent dumbass.

Oh Dial-A-Joke, yes you can make me laugh.

Did you hear? Kim Jong-il got cancer.... I guess that secret plan worked!

/got nothing
//apolitical, nothing to base it on

Obama..."What hangs upside-down, and has a little d*ck?"

Person on phone..."A bat?"

Obama..."Correct. Now what has a big d*ck and hangs up?"

I was about to go Presidential on dat ass.

Awww, yeah! In about two seconds, I'm gonna give Michelle down there the ol' "BOOM! Headshot!" Ya'know'I'm'sayin'?

LoLz! And next I'm taking over health care and then who knows? Maybe we can have a red, white and blue hammer and sickle? No one will dare call me on it, this is a blast!

"What -- breaking the law? C'mon, how can that be when nothing I'm doing is even listed in the Constitution?"

"Is this Patrick?"

No, YOU hang up first! No, you.....You didn't hang up! I love you MORE. No, YOU hang up first!

Swampthing in Korea: "HA, I know! Hope. Change. Can you believe the suckers fell for it?"

/Now with voting

It's always sad when someone puts in so much effort for such little quality and so few votes.

Right, good, now take the mattress and throw it out the window. (snicker)

Did you see that 17 yr old Brazilian girl's booty? Dam, she's got the butt of a black woman! I'ld Cap and Trade that like ther was no tomorrow!

"I know; I know. I still can't believe they're calling me the first black president, when I'm only half black and was raised by my white relatives! I'm more like the first minstrel president."

Yankees Team Gynecologist: Swampthing in Korea: "HA, I know! Hope. Change. Can you believe the suckers fell for it?"

/Now with voting

It's always sad when someone puts in so much effort for such little quality and so few votes.

You forgot to enable voting.

What the hell is the Aluminum Falcon??

"Oh my God, this War on Recession is gonna rule! I can't wait until the War is over and there's no more recession!"

//apologies to GYWO.

Perhaps it would be better if you bill me for the flowers, I'm sure it'll be all right with your boss... Well, I don't know if you recognize my voice, but this is the president... Of the United States!... Hello?

"You've gotta do the cooking by the book. You know you can't be lazy."

Mr. Telephone man
There's something wrong with my line,
When I dial my baby's number
I get a click every time

"I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am."

"You use a phone with a cord? Yeah, yrr ghey, too."

"Yup, I'm a lightweight."

Yeah. I got a new teleprompter. It's telling me to smile.

"Yeah, baby. I was totally checking out your booty. Fooled everyone into thinking I was helping some fat chick down the stairs, but I was really checking you out. Wanna come over and have a cigar with me? No? Dang... it worked for Bill."

Hello? Dick Cheney? Tell me, how did you fool Liberals in Congress into believing Iraq had WMDs so you could invade Iraq? That would help me when the time comes for Iran.

BTW, your daughter is hot. Oh what? She's a lesbo!? Dayyyummm!

LOL. What?????? Pictures of bottle rockets?!? You one bad motha.....you shut yo mouth dog!!!!

Kudos, jdreich. Bring on the Sorkin references!

\

'So I came up with...'saved or created jobs'....it's impossible to prove but it's also impossible to dis-prove...and the lemmings who voted for my are too stupid to understand that."

whereisian: لا أستطيع أن أصدق أنها تراجعت عن ذلك

I lol'd.

Crude: What the hell is the Aluminum Falcon??

Should have enabled voting, I lol'd.

"Yeah, find two Arab guys and have them stand in line behind Bill ORLY at White Castle and say things like "I'm glad he's a Muslim" and "I can't wait for that law banning Christmas to get passed." Oh, yeah, it'll be on his next show. Really, he's that gullible; it'll be hilarious."

And today I visited the 57th state, and I got a buckit stuck on my head and I got a stimulus and I got a unicorn and....wha? Penis goes where?

onebadgungan -
The thread was over with that one. Major props.

What the fark is my problem?

"I hear you man. I also think Fark should have greenlighted a Sotomayor hearing thread in the Politics tab too. Probably a bunch of white male admins today."

That's "B" as in "boy.
"A" as in "apple".
"R" as in...

You know what? It's Bob. My name's Bob.

Want to vote for limboslam but can't. Tarnations

OK, guess no one's answering,
Well can't you just let it ring a little longer, longer, longer?
I'll just sit tight, through the shadows of the night,
And let it ring for evermore

PapermonkeyExpress: "Yeah, so I tells them, I tells them 'It's working, you guys just got to give it more time.' I know, can you believe it?? Almost $800 Billion $1.5 trillion and nothing to show for it, not even an idea WHERE it went.

"I don't know why we Democrats Republicans didn't think of this sooner! The term 'Simulus' War on Terror allows us to spend money on ANYTHING."

\

'So I came up with...'saved or created jobs'....it's impossible to prove but it's also impossible to dis-prove...and the lemmings who voted for my are too stupid to understand that."

My favorite part is where Fonz says "AAAYYYYYEE"! Hilarious every time.

Hopefully not to late in the game to post this. tldr other posts if someone already did it.

No she's in Texas at the moment but let me tell you if all the women in Texas looks like Michelle's momma the Lone Ranger is going to be lonely a long time.

Yeah I'm lickin ua ballz. Best ballz I evah had. Ya ballz are big. Ya got King Kong ballz.

/not obscure

brigid_fitch: Yeah, I'm TOTALLY wearing a polo shirt in the Oval Office while the photographers are here! Another "scandal" for the 22-percenters to harp on about for the next few days. Bwahahahahaha!"

"I'm in the office on a Sunday! What are YOU wearing?"

sxacho: That's "B" as in "boy.
"A" as in "apple".
"R" as in...

You know what? It's Bob. My name's Bob.

You could at least credit me for the shoop.

Yeah, biatch stole my fish too!

"AAHHHH these biatches said they wanted change! AAAHAHAHA"

Type40: Hello? Hello, Dmitriy? Listen, I can't hear too well, do you suppose you could turn the music down just a little? Oh, that's much better. Yes. Fine, I can hear you now, Dmitriy. Clear and plain and coming through fine. I'm coming through fine too, eh? Good, then. Well then as you say we're both coming through fine. Good. Well it's good that you're fine and I'm fine. I agree with you. It's great to be fine

1nsanilicious: /Type40 that was the stupidest block of text ever. I only read it to see if you were goin somewhere with it and the answer is no.

Type40: You've never seen Dr Strangelove? I was just amazed no one posted it before me.

Well, I got it. But maybe that's because I saw it again for the second time just a few days ago. Kids today, huh?

//One votey from me