Killerclaw: AirForceVet: RobertBruce: headline fail. but that is a damn good read. i had no idea about a lot of that.

Actually this is old history, but it's nice that Fark occasionally educates the young how close they came to speaking German, Japanese, or both.

I speak Japanese.

I think I'm turing Japanese ... I really think so.

Killerclaw: AirForceVet: RobertBruce: headline fail. but that is a damn good read. i had no idea about a lot of that.

Actually this is old history, but it's nice that Fark occasionally educates the young how close they came to speaking German, Japanese, or both.

I speak Japanese.

あなたも？

detfrost1: Dude Subby, I almost pissed my pants when I saw this headline!

You must have gotten this question wrong on your 8th grade history test.

Who was the President of the United States at the beginning of World War II?

A) W.H. Harrison
B) Teddy Roosevelt
C) Taft
D) Franklin Delano Roosevelt (FDR)
E) Your Mom


C... the answer's always C, right?

gwenners: Godwined in the boobies!

I love a good Godwin'ing in the boobies!

Walt_Jizzney: Errr....where in the article did "nearly convince" happen, subby? As far as I - and the article - can tell, it was rebuffed outright...

Yeah, but you also thought Teddy was dead in '40. We can't expect somebody unaware of the political influence of zombie Teddy to have decent reading comprehension skills. Though really, zombie Teddy was just playing along to get close to Hitler, and then kick his ass. And eat his brain.

Many Americans actually thought Hitler was the cat's meow, amongst them Henry Ford and William Randolph Hearst. The Germans used a machine designed by IBM to more efficiently keep track of and round up Jews.

Don't forget the Bund...

Jesus H. Christ. That was one of the most chilling things I've ever read, even though I know things turned out OK.

Franklin, not Teddy.

Germany wasn't a complete nation until the 1800s. The British had been fighting the French on and off for centuries. France fought the British in the French-Indian War. They helped the Americans in the Revolutionary War. Napolean then came along. So the British fighting France wouldn't have been completely out of the question, except mainly for the fact of Germany starting the war, as Basil Fawlty later pointed out, by invading Poland. Though the Allies later did, German terror bombing of cities, invading Norway, the Netherlands, etc didn't make people too keen on the Nazis either.

Americans didn't want to be in the war until Pearl Harbor, though before that, U-Boats were attacking ships, including US ships. The USS Reuben James being sunk, the first US Navy ship lost in the war.

Perhaps this is an effort to mirror the Austria/Australia meme with a Teddy/Franklin meme.

So ... Edward was a secret muslim?

/hot, like subby's mom was with me last night

gibbon1: detfrost1: Dude Subby, I almost pissed my pants when I saw this headline!

You must have gotten this question wrong on your 8th grade history test.

Who was the President of the United States at the beginning of World War II?

A) W.H. Harrison
B) Teddy Roosevelt
C) Taft
D) Franklin Delano Roosevelt (FDR)
E) Your Mom

F) A, B, C, and D all banged Subbies mom. But the Duke of Windsor is the one that knocked her up.

Opps good catch, I apologize for my negligence in leaving off F) I'll attempt to correct that error in future posts.

olddinosaur: [Hitler] had in fact rebuilt Germany from the ground up, and attracted a lot of acclaim for his accomplishments.

If he had died in 1940, he would have gone down in history as the greatest German ever to live.

Wrong.

Hitler's supposed gains in productivity were a sham. He attracted acclaim, of course, but it was a self-congratulatory circle jerk. The Nazi government created the illusion of an economic revival through a combination of creative statistics and socialized war production.

You can't build a sustainable economy on nothing but fat military contracts. It boosts your factory employment numbers for a while, sure, but it could never create genuine, sustainable economic vitality. It causes a net loss in wealth, actually.

(The same principle applies to "stimulus" spending, too.)

I think subby is thinking of when the romans dumped the tea in the black sea in protest.

That Duke really sucked. Nixon graduated from Duke Law School a few years before this story took place (That Nixon, not the baseball Nixon).

It is sad really that no one in this thread is familiar with the exploits of time traveling Teddy- I blame it on the educational systen in the United States...

or maybe the manifestations of power/knowledge don't want this to be part of the known construct of history... it could be distabilizing of the self-reinforcing gesture of historicity... I'll have to ask time traveling Foucault

/walk softly and carry a big paradox

cmb53208: Many Americans actually thought Hitler was the cat's meow, amongst them Henry Ford and William Randolph Hearst. The Germans used a machine designed by IBM to more efficiently keep track of and round up Jews.

Don't forget the Bund...

Indeed, and in turn Henry Ford was one of Hitler's heroes, he had his picture on his wall like a right nerdy fanboy.

Phinn: Hitler's supposed gains in productivity were a sham. He attracted acclaim, of course, but it was a self-congratulatory circle jerk. The Nazi government created the illusion of an economic revival through a combination of creative statistics and socialized war production.

You can't build a sustainable economy on nothing but fat military contracts. It boosts your factory employment numbers for a while, sure, but it could never create genuine, sustainable economic vitality. It causes a net loss in wealth, actually.

I'm pretty sure conquering the productivity of others offers at least a temporary boost to real economic power. Der Fuhrer got the Czech munition factories at Munich after all... they provided tangible production ability.

AirForceVet: RobertBruce: headline fail. but that is a damn good read. i had no idea about a lot of that.

Actually this is old history, but it's nice that Fark occasionally educates the young how close they came to speaking German, Japanese, or both.

But I already do speak German.

Subby has it all wrong.

But for muddle headed policies of King Edward the VIII, The American colonies might have lost the Revolutionary War and then we would all be speaking English now.

Cagey B

It was a tenuous reign for the Bull Moose Coalition in the 1940's. They almost backed the Nazis since doing so would have ensured the support of the Vikings and their strategically placed fleets off the coast of Australia.

You left out the Chinese gunboats patrolling the Mississippi to protect their laundries in St. Louis.

Cagey B: It was a tenuous reign for the Bull Moose Coalition in the 1940's. They almost backed the Nazis since doing so would have ensured the support of the Vikings and their strategically placed fleets off the coast of Australia.

Fortunately, our Mongolian allies and their nuclear weapons carried the day.

Ah...that brings back bitter memories of the Australian-American war. To this day, the shrill warcry that an Aussie made as he charged our trenches and was mowed down haunts my dreams and waking life...I may never fully recover.

/great find, subby

ToddMU03: AirForceVet: RobertBruce: headline fail. but that is a damn good read. i had no idea about a lot of that.

Actually this is old history, but it's nice that Fark occasionally educates the young how close they came to speaking German, Japanese, or both.

But I already do speak German.

And I grew up in Japan.

We should probably just turn ourselves in now and get it over with.

Paris1127 - Gyrfalcon: Bolo Jungle: Paris1127: Unfortunately for Subby, not only was Teddy Roosevelt no longer president at that time, but he was also long dead.

Hey - maybe you're thinking of the WRONG HITLER!!

He said Nazis, though, and there were only one of them. One party of them. One group of Nazis. There was only one Nazi party. I think that's right.

I hope there was only one Nazi party, and only one Hitler too for that matter...


There was only one Hitler.

Originally...

He was dazzled by the fact that Der Fuhrer was a terrific dancer.

El Oh El

You're all giving subby too much grief for a minor error. Few realize that when FDR was stricken with Polio, it gave Teddy's vengeful spirit the perfect opportunity to possess him. You see, after Teddy's failed campaign bid under the Bull Moose party, he became embittered and felt betrayed by the US populace. Nursing the grudge past the grave, he became even further annoyed to see his gimpy cousin Franklin's political success. His enraged spirit fully intended to turn us over to the Nazis. In fact, were it not for the intervention of the justified ancient of Mu Mu, we'd all be speaking German today.

/KLF

jaerik: We should probably just turn ourselves in now and get it over with.

Good idea.

Phinn: olddinosaur: [Hitler] had in fact rebuilt Germany from the ground up, and attracted a lot of acclaim for his accomplishments.

If he had died in 1940, he would have gone down in history as the greatest German ever to live.

Wrong.

Hitler's supposed gains in productivity were a sham. He attracted acclaim, of course, but it was a self-congratulatory circle jerk. The Nazi government created the illusion of an economic revival through a combination of creative statistics and socialized war production.

You can't build a sustainable economy on nothing but fat military contracts. It boosts your factory employment numbers for a while, sure, but it could never create genuine, sustainable economic vitality. It causes a net loss in wealth, actually.

(The same principle applies to "stimulus" spending, too.)

The Nurmberg laws also helped. Many Germans were sent into the employment force (mostly in the professional fields) while not counting the displaced Jewish professionals since they were not citizens anymore. Great way to make unemployment seem like less of an issue.

RTFA, subby. Frankie (NOT Teddy) already saw him for what he really was and had Fart Barf and Itch keep a close watch on him during his stay.

Sounds like subby needs a refund on that Mail Order GED in History he got out of the back of a magazine.

ToddMU03: AirForceVet: RobertBruce: headline fail. but that is a damn good read. i had no idea about a lot of that.

Actually this is old history, but it's nice that Fark occasionally educates the young how close they came to speaking German, Japanese, or both.

But I already do speak German.

Mein Englisch ist besser, aber mein Deutsch ist nicht schlecht.

I probably mangled some there. Entschuldigung.

Oh and...

Daily Express - the Daily Mail's younger, stupider, brother.

See? He was just trying to be like his great-grand-uncle.



/surprised no one posted this yet

hissatsu: You're all giving subby too much grief for a minor error. Few realize that when FDR was stricken with Polio, it gave Teddy's vengeful spirit the perfect opportunity to possess him. You see, after Teddy's failed campaign bid under the Bull Moose party, he became embittered and felt betrayed by the US populace. Nursing the grudge past the grave, he became even further annoyed to see his gimpy cousin Franklin's political success. His enraged spirit fully intended to turn us over to the Nazis. In fact, were it not for the intervention of the justified ancient of Mu Mu, we'd all be speaking German today.

/KLF

Are gonna rock ya.

/justified AND ancient.
//you know what we drive.

That he was sympathetic to the Germans is now well known. But I did not know that he committed such acts of treason. He should have been shot. The British executed traitors for for far less than he did during WWII. I guess the Brits were still squeamish about killing royalty.

You're all giving subby too much grief for a minor error. Few realize that when FDR was stricken with Polio, it gave Teddy's vengeful spirit the perfect opportunity to possess him. You see, after Teddy's failed campaign bid under the Bull Moose party, he became embittered and felt betrayed by the US populace. Nursing the grudge past the grave, he became even further annoyed to see his gimpy cousin Franklin's political success. His enraged spirit fully intended to turn us over to the Nazis. In fact, were it not for the intervention of the justified ancient of Mu Mu, we'd all be speaking German today.

Just to be pedantic, was FDR TR's cousin?: FDR married his own cousin Elenore Roosevelt, who was Teddy's niece, so thus the relationship was ..... (hang on I'll go and ask Morgan, he'll know)

Was this the same guy who persuaded Prescott Bush and IBM?
...waitaminnnnnute...

the 1930's Lutheran Terrorist scare

*shudders*

now THOSE were some scary times to be alive!

olddinosaur: However you have to remember: By 1940 Hitler had not done his worst work, this would not come until the closing years of the war.

I just read The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie. In the book, Miss Brodie often praises Italy's fascist system as progressive and humanitarian.
(The book is set in 1930s Scotland, though written in 1961.)
Weird perspective of a British author, even weirder that it was written after the fact.

/Fuzzy on some facts. Like if Scotland was as committed to fighting in WWII as England (either by choice or by being targeted by the Axis powers.) And the extent of Mussolini's oppression and crimes against humanity.
/I do know who was president when the war started, however.

He remembers.

I find it curious that TeddyRooseveltsMustache has not posted in this thread yet.

simpsonfan: Americans didn't want to be in the war until Pearl Harbor, though before that, U-Boats were attacking ships, including US ships. The USS Reuben James being sunk, the first US Navy ship lost in the war.

Maybe the common American didn't want to be in the war, but his President sure did. The USS Ruben James wasn't sunk until months after FDR publicly co-authored the Allied war aims with Churchill.

Cagey B: It was a tenuous reign for the Bull Moose Coalition in the 1940's. They almost backed the Nazis since doing so would have ensured the support of the Vikings and their strategically placed fleets off the coast of Australia.

Fortunately, our Mongolian allies and their nuclear weapons carried the day.

I actually did a spit take..that turned into choking and was less funny at that point.

FTFA 'Thanks to his great-grandfather Prince Albert and his mother Queen Mary, not to mention his Hanoverian ancestor King George I, the Prince of Wales was as much German as he was English and so comfortable with the German language that he sometimes referred to it as his mother tongue.'

The Royals at that time had more German blood than that. Queen (not Teddy) Victoria was wholly German and married her wholly German cousin. She supposedly didn't even speak English until she was school aged. Edward (not Teddy )VII was pretty much all German and his wife was half German as well. George (not Teddy) V was more German then his wife, who was only about half german, so its weird that TFA would bring her and Albert up instead...

Sometimes I think the admins greenlight these trainwreck headlines just so we can have a bash subby thread.

So let me add mine: Thanks subby for the clarification, because I always thought it was Teddy's Rough Riders that took Omaha Beach.

A Nazi sympathizer thread on Fark and not one mention of Prescott Bush? You guys are slipping.

jenny next: olddinosaur: However you have to remember: By 1940 Hitler had not done his worst work, this would not come until the closing years of the war.

I just read The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie. In the book, Miss Brodie often praises Italy's fascist system as progressive and humanitarian.
(The book is set in 1930s Scotland, though written in 1961.)
Weird perspective of a British author, even weirder that it was written after the fact.

/Fuzzy on some facts. Like if Scotland was as committed to fighting in WWII as England (either by choice or by being targeted by the Axis powers.) And the extent of Mussolini's oppression and crimes against humanity.
/I do know who was president when the war started, however.

One thing the whippersnappers forget these days: in the 30s, what with the Great Depression and all, democracy was on the ropes. John Scott in "Beyond the Urals" and other progressive writers were finding that the Soviet experiment was working beyond belief. The fascists were solving problems as well. The Western Democracies were suffering a severe crisis of conscience: WWI had shattered "the Proud Tower." New ideologies seemed to be the way to solve the problems of the troubled present and of the future.

Huey Long was making a great case - and so were other politicians. Sinclair Lewis' "It Can't Happen Here" shows how different forms of governance could take place. Many of these new schemes were scientific, respectable, even.

Thank God things turned out the way they did. Bad as the world is today, it could have been much much worse.

Subby, that wasn't Teddy Roosevelt. You're thinking of Helen Keller.

/Can't believe no one said it yet.

Mad-n-FL: Next, we see FOX news report on Prescott Bush[D] and his real support for the Nazis?

Kurmudgeon: A Nazi sympathizer thread on Fark and not one mention of Prescott Bush? You guys are slipping.

You were saying? You forgot to mention Charles Lindbergh.

/hate to pick on a fellow Mountaineer