is it me, or are some of those posting here, taking some of the guys obvious attempts at humor little too literally?

We did the midwife thing (not my idea) and I buried both my kid's placentas in our raspberry patch behind the house. When we moved out I wondered if I should tell the new owners about it. I decided what they didn't know wouldn't hurt them and I'd hate to see all of those awesome raspberries go to waste.

redsquid: Hippy chicks seem fun at first when their worst trait is listening to the Dead while you get it on. Then they want to eat a placenta. It all ends up years later with the 'Earth Mother Gaia Worship and Colonic Health Solstice Party' in your backyard. 40+ year old unshaven hippy boilers talking about their feelings while doing enemas and burning a shiatload of sage. If you ever find yourself wanting to bang a hippy run away as fast as you can!

Don't knock it til you try em! One of my best lovers was a full blown hippy chick.
Though the armpit hair was a bit offputting, but it's just hair.

gunsculptor: is it me, or are some of those posting here, taking some of the guys obvious attempts at humor little too literally?

Quite.

Cerebral Ballsy: Wow. That article was like watching a divorce 20 years in advance. Way to marry shallow, dude.

Where can I find a guy who will marry me just for my body, mock me in a national article, and refer to how things will be different when I'm aged and no longer worth as much?

Oh wait, I'm with someone sincere. Nevermind.

I can only imagine this kind of statement will resurface at some point as irony when your sincere partner files for divorce claiming you having no sense of humor are self righteous and a complete bore?

Holy s**t that is VILE.

/Threw up in my mouth a little

"f I ever kill a man in my own home, I am totally calling the placenta lady. "

does anyone have any good placenta recipes? or is it best served raw?

fusillade762: God help us all when Gorgor gets wind of this thread.


I'm going to sound incredibly ignorant here but what's the deal with Gorgor? He posts sum great stuff but I read somewhere earlier today that he's banned from submitting articles. He never says much either

some_beer_drinker: does anyone have any good placenta recipes? or is it best served raw?

1 whole placenta
1 medical waste disposal bin


Combine ingredients. Walk away. Get drunk.

TheGreatGazoo: What politician wrote the law that said that placentas had to be cooked in the owner's kitchen? And then what group of them voted to approve it?


OmfG I bet THAT session would have been entertaining as hell to listen in on!

TheGreatGazoo: What politician wrote the law that said that placentas had to be cooked in the owner's kitchen? And then what group of them voted to approve it?

It almost didn't pass because they added alot of pork.

as long as there's some A1 on hand, you're good.

dlime16: Are you guys serious? You wouldn't eat the placenta if you gave birth? It's there to help provide nutrition. It exists for a reason and is helpful for you.



And looks god damn delicious.

That's the placenta's good side you know. The other side looks like frondy alien mess. That part actually doesn't look too bad, but the other side creeps me the fark out.
Link (new window)
And I am such a nice guy that I did not shiat the image directly into the thread.

The irony of my situation was I had just finished lunch...which consisted of a fishwich.

It shouldn't be too hard to connect the dots..

Jormungandr: dlime16: Are you guys serious? You wouldn't eat the placenta if you gave birth? It's there to help provide nutrition. It exists for a reason and is helpful for you.



And looks god damn delicious.

That's the placenta's good side you know. The other side looks like frondy alien mess. That part actually doesn't look too bad, but the other side creeps me the fark out.
Link (new window)
And I am such a nice guy that I did not shiat the image directly into the thread.

No thanks...I've already successfully kept lunch down. I don't want to give up dinner.

/actual image of someone eating placenta umbilical cord

I actually cooked and ate placenta last year. It started off as a bit of a joke early in the pregnancy, but somewhere along the line I got a few people to agree to eat it if I actually went through with it. As it turned out it was twins - bloody massive old placenta. Looked like calves liver. I did it on the chargrill and served it with swiss chard, pancetta, pine nuts & balsamic vinegar. If you can get it out of your head it's placenta then it's no more challenging than liver or kidneys. But of course you can't because you're eating a f*cking placenta that came out of your wife's growler...... so it was vile.

The article is pretty good, considering it was written by a man. Sometimes you guys have a really funny outlook on things. Always a good laugh. Hope his wife doesn't have to deal with post-partum depression.

Somacandra: Of course its bloody and veiny and chewy. What the fark did you think it looked like? Billowy clouds above a romantic lavender sunset?

Lavender?

You know this ain't Mars. The colors in sunsets here on Earth tend towards the red & orange end of the spectrum.

/FYI

triptik: Have it tanned and crafted into a football that is given to the boy after he wins his first championship game.



Why did you do that? WHY?

Catsmeow: Ikahoshi

If anyone other than the mother eats placenta, it should be declared cannibalism.


No. If the Mother eats it, she is eating her child's tissues. The placenta is not part of the mother's body. It is a discarded, no-longer-needed part of the baby's body. It interfaced with hers. Some of the blood there is hers. Most is the baby's, which contains an immature form of red blood cells that can pick up more oxygen and release more carbon dioxide. That's how it survives in there, the cutsy wootsy Mommy's little parasite.


Well technically the placenta is a cooperative association of the mother's and the baby's tissues, so although there is a certain amount of the child's tissue there, it's still sorta a part of the mother's body, as a part of the process of reproduction. Additionally, since mammal mothers are the ones who eat the placenta in survival situations, I'd say that's the natural way it's done.

When other people partake it transcends a no longer useful survival driven habit, and moves into the cannibalism range of behavior.

Therefore I stand by my original statement.

Note I said natural, not preferred. It's also natural to occasionally eat feces, but I don't endorse that behavior either.

placentOWNED

So it's not ok to eat meat, unless you shoot it out of your front butt?

Ikahoshi: Lavender?

You know this ain't Mars. The colors in sunsets here on Earth tend towards the red & orange end of the spectrum.



It can happen:

I have two comments:

1) It came out of the woman's body and if it helps with postpartum depression and she's willing to eat it, then good on her. Whatever floats your boat. PPD is truly horrible. Hearing of a new mother who ate her placenta vs. new mother bashing her and her newborns head on bottom of an overpass. Which is worse? Again, science is inconclusive at this.
2) I'm with the granola hippy chick and you know, it's pretty good. Yeah, there are these quirks but they make life interesting. They keep the relationship interesting. And sometimes it's good for you. Heck, I might even try going vegetarian in the next year. Change things up a bit.
Screw you boring ass haters. Hope your life is dull, lonely and you decide to kill yourselves, soon.
The guy in the article: I hope he was trying to be funny. Unfortunately he didn't come off as funny, just mean. I can relate, and in fact might share some of the same sentiments, but i wouldn't voice those feelings in such a crude and mean way.

Dangl1ng: I have two comments:

1) It came out of the woman's body and if it helps with postpartum depression and she's willing to eat it, then good on her. Whatever floats your boat. PPD is truly horrible. Hearing of a new mother who ate her placenta vs. new mother bashing her and her newborns head on bottom of an overpass. Which is worse? Again, science is inconclusive at this.
2) I'm with the granola hippy chick and you know, it's pretty good. Yeah, there are these quirks but they make life interesting. They keep the relationship interesting. And sometimes it's good for you. Heck, I might even try going vegetarian in the next year. Change things up a bit.
Screw you boring ass haters. Hope your life is dull, lonely and you decide to kill yourselves, soon.
The guy in the article: I hope he was trying to be funny. Unfortunately he didn't come off as funny, just mean. I can relate, and in fact might share some of the same sentiments, but i wouldn't voice those feelings in such a crude and mean way.

Yeah, but I really think they need to due away with mothers who kill their babby. becuse these babby cant frigth back?
it was on the news this mroing a mother in ar who had kill her three kids . they are taking the three babby back to new york too lady to rest my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots

OK, so I think eating the placenta is totally nasty (I am a bit of a hippie and a girl but also a vegetarian mostly, so that admittedly may have something to do with it). BUT no one seems to have pointed out that this chick called someone to have hers made into a bunch of pills. While I'm still not into it personally, I do think this is a way to get whatever benefits there may or may not be in a much MUCH less gross way. I mean, you just swallow a pill with some dried powdery stuff in it. No, like, chewing (ewww) involved. No BBQ sauce necessary.

So while still gross, I'm just saying it's much more doable this way.

(Also, I garden, and the 'bury it by a tree' also weirds me out - I dunno.)

Peki: The article is pretty good, considering it was written by a man. Sometimes you guys have a really funny outlook on things. Always a good laugh. Hope his wife doesn't have to deal with post-partum depression.


Do I detect a passive agressive jab in support of placenta eating?

There's no evidence whatsoever that ingesting placenta does anything medical for a new mother. None. It's not even a common practice among all traditional peoples, only a minority, like circumcision, which implies it's a cultural choice, not a biological necessity.

However, If you do support the concept of eating the placenta for supposed medically beneficial effects... you should be aware that cooking it would destroy or denature most of the hormones that would supposedly help the mother if it were true.

So be ready to drink that raw placenta smoothie, since cooked it's little better than meat.


If that doesn't appeal to you, you could go for a nice veal liver, fry that up and have that instead, get the same effects with a bonus: you'd not be considered a cannibal.

Yay!

Gawdzila: Ikahoshi: Lavender?

You know this ain't Mars. The colors in sunsets here on Earth tend towards the red & orange end of the spectrum.



It can happen:




Looks like pink to me. Lavender is a blue-mauve color.

Perhaps you mean fuscia? I've seen that before. Rare, but it happens.

This article and the ensuing thread made me thankful for the clinical nature of my c-section. I'm all for breastfeeding and some of the granola parental trends but this is just wrong. Just because it happens in nature (with animals) doesn't mean it is natural for humans.

/icked out for days, I fear

Iron Chef Scottish: I actually cooked and ate placenta last year. It started off as a bit of a joke early in the pregnancy, but somewhere along the line I got a few people to agree to eat it if I actually went through with it. As it turned out it was twins - bloody massive old placenta. Looked like calves liver. I did it on the chargrill and served it with swiss chard, pancetta, pine nuts & balsamic vinegar. If you can get it out of your head it's placenta then it's no more challenging than liver or kidneys. But of course you can't because you're eating a f*cking placenta that came out of your wife's growler...... so it was vile.

You will know eventually that she'll go batshiat insane.

zincprincess: This article and the ensuing thread made me thankful for the clinical nature of my c-section. I'm all for breastfeeding and some of the granola parental trends but this is just wrong. Just because it happens in nature (with animals) doesn't mean it is natural for humans.

/icked out for days, I fear



And just think, every time you see your scar, you'll be reminded of this thread and will be icked out for days again

Dangl1ng:
Screw you boring ass haters. Hope your life is dull, lonely and you decide to kill yourselves, soon.
The guy in the article: I hope he was trying to be funny. Unfortunately he didn't come off as funny, just mean. I can relate, and in fact might share some of the same sentiments, but i wouldn't voice those feelings in such a crude and mean way.

/facepalm

gunsculptor: Cerebral Ballsy: Wow. That article was like watching a divorce 20 years in advance. Way to marry shallow, dude.

Where can I find a guy who will marry me just for my body, mock me in a national article, and refer to how things will be different when I'm aged and no longer worth as much?

Oh wait, I'm with someone sincere. Nevermind.

I can only imagine this kind of statement will resurface at some point as irony when your sincere partner files for divorce claiming you having no sense of humor are self righteous and a complete bore?

Wow. You know so much about me from one post, you're f*cking amazing man! You ever work for the Psychic Friends Network?

As for my sense of humor, which is quite robust and witty, there's one thing I don't do: trash talk my partner. And certainly not to sell a few copies of a low grade news magazine. If I had a problem (and I would have a problem eating placenta or even having it in the kitchen), I would tell him like a normal, rational adult. And like a normal rational adult, I would not marry someone who was batshiat insane.

I know, logic is a strange thing here on the net, and the exposure to me must have shocked you.

editorial_distractions: OK, so I think eating the placenta is totally nasty (I am a bit of a hippie and a girl but also a vegetarian mostly, so that admittedly may have something to do with it). BUT no one seems to have pointed out that this chick called someone to have hers made into a bunch of pills. While I'm still not into it personally, I do think this is a way to get whatever benefits there may or may not be in a much MUCH less gross way. I mean, you just swallow a pill with some dried powdery stuff in it. No, like, chewing (ewww) involved. No BBQ sauce necessary.

So while still gross, I'm just saying it's much more doable this way.

(Also, I garden, and the 'bury it by a tree' also weirds me out - I dunno.)

It's people. Soylent Green is made out of people. They're making our food out of people. Next thing they'll be breeding us like cattle for food. You've gotta tell them. You've gotta tell them!

Cerebral Ballsy: I would not marry someone who was batshiat insane.

I have you Farkied as "insane" and I don't remember why. I'm sure it must have been something you said.

Cerebral Ballsy:
Wow. You know so much about me from one post, you're f*cking amazing man! You ever work for the Psychic Friends Network?

As for my sense of humor, which is quite robust and witty, there's one thing I don't do: trash talk my partner. And certainly not to sell a few copies of a low grade news magazine. If I had a problem (and I would have a problem eating placenta or even having it in the kitchen), I would tell him like a normal, rational adult. And like a normal rational adult, I would not marry someone who was batshiat insane.

I know, logic is a strange thing here on the net, and the exposure to me must have shocked you.

/facepalm

EmmaLou: WTF is wrong with people? Animals also eat their offspring's shiat, but I don't see people sucking on dirty diapers.

You haven't spent enough time on the internet.

Thanks to this story I am now able to stick to my diet because I am sick to my stomach.

The crazy skank is probably a vegetarian too.

Ikahoshi: Looks like pink to me. Lavender is a blue-mauve color.

Perhaps you mean fuscia?

Are you seriously being that nitpicky?
Look, here is lavender the flower, which is what I imagine Crayola is going for when they name their crayons:


I'm pretty certain I can find something close to that color in the picture somewhere. Perhaps not precisely (I doubt lavender has an exact agreed-upon RGB value anyway), but that isn't really the point. The point is that we do, in fact, have light-purple colors in our sunsets, not just red-orange.

At the end of the article:

Watch TIME's video "Eating Placenta."

No, thank you. Really. No. Just...no.

This is the most relevant thing Mark Steyn has ever written.

Article is full of win. And, as a father who has experienced the "placenta tug-of-war" that the doctor does after the birth, as for eating the damn thing, I can only say: Christ on a bicycle.

/Only part of the birth process that made me turn green
//rest of it is something that is too incredible for words

scalpod: legion_of_doo: WTF?

/yeah, honey, let's run around naked like animals, eat raw meat, eat our own poop, eat placentas, and do barbaric crap because animals do it too. In fact, f*** the house & the mortgage... let's just live in the trees like our monkey uncles.

Our first biggest mistake was leaving the trees.

Our second biggest mistake was leaving the caves.

BACK TO THE CAVES!

It was leaving the ocean.

RicosRoughnecks: Cats do make cleaning up easy when they give birth. I was disgusted at first when my cat had five kittens and those gross placentas came out. Then I was happy she gobbled them up since it meant I didn't have to touch them.

That's hardcore. Eating that shiat raw. Just, damn.

Thunderpipes: You guys should live on a farm, I lived on a horse farm and helped deliver foals each spring. Had to pull one out forcibly because of a "red bag" delivery. You have to tie up the umbilical and all the grossness into knots and let it hang from the mama's hoo hoo untill the placenta and all the nasties fall out from gravity. It smells awful.

Eating that crap? Oh goodness some chicks are weird.

I worked on a horse farm and I've done that many times. Fourteen or more foals a season, fourteen or more placentas a year. I usually had to cart the placenta off into the woods later to keep coyotes away. Absolutely disgusting even several feet away at the end of a pitchfork.

I never wanted children, but that nasty thing coming out of me is just an extra reason to never spawn. Watching the vet use his bare farking hands to inspect the placenta is humbling, because damn that's nasty.

My WAG:

Animals may be in labor for many hours, without the ability to find food for a day or more.
Placenta is almost pure protein and doesn't run away.
Stillborn babies are also pure protein.

If the mother doesn't eat the placenta and the stillborn, another predator will arrive to do so, and may eat the live babies and even mom too.

The phrase dog eat dog world comes to mind.