Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.

ahahahahaha

Guy must have been really drunk to allow anyone near his willie with a tattooing needle.

Where's gorgor with the pic of the guy with the dragon tattoo on his junk?

Megain: Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.ahahahahaha

the most salient point of the article...

SpaceyCat: Where's gorgor with the pic of the guy with the dragon tattoo on his junk?

It's sad that I know what image you're referring to.

Megain: Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.

ahahahahaha

Hey, it was cold in that courtroom!

/oblig

What's latin for 'Terrible & Diminutive lizard' ???

SpaceyCat: Where's gorgor with the pic of the guy with the dragon tattoo on his junk?

oh so NSFW/L/D/A (new window)

Homage to gorgor


/he probably has the real lizard one ;)

Schadenfreude ist die schoenste Freude: SpaceyCat: Where's gorgor with the pic of the guy with the dragon tattoo on his junk?

It's sad that I know what image you're referring to.

Here you go (new window, obviously NSFW and damn painful to get)

When you think of things that could potentially save your ass in court, "lizard tattoo on the penis" probably ranks dead last

Second to last, actually -- just ahead of "penis on lizard tattoo".

Megain: Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.
ahahahahaha

"Wendy? Mine says 'Welcome to Jamaica, mon, have a nice day!'"

/Probably not obscure.

Welcome aboard!

Megain: Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.ahahahahaha

Best punchline to a story evar!

Anyone heard the one about the guy with Swan tattoed on his penis?

I've got an asterisk on my penis and a seven inch lizard on my foot.

Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long

I can't stop lol'ing

Not sure I'd like a lizard or a swan,

But a swallow on my penis sounds good.

I read that a rape charge was dismissed because the victim said her attacker was 'small'.

Defendant, judge, both lawyers and ballif confer in judge's chambers.
5 minutes later, case dismissed.

LT on the P = new FARK cliche in 4, 3, 2....

Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.

LMAO, I just sprayed beer all over the keyboard...

Proud.

HIS DAD, "fer god's sake son. why 'n the hell would you pay somebody to tatoo yer cock?

kids..."

Maybe it was 2 inches wide.

What? No "drain the lizard" joke?

NakedApe: I've got an asterisk on my penis and a seven inch lizard on my foot.

I know there's a joke in there somewhere, I'm just not getting it. Footnote?

darrent83 - Dude its 10:30, west coast drinking time doesn't start for another half hour.

Hey, it's the weekend. Also, I have a mean hangover.

When I was in college, a guy in my dorm was accused by a sorority girl of forcing her to perform oral sex on him for over an hour while he held a knife to her throat. Although he had no alibi, he was completely unfazed by the accusation.

He met with his court-appointed attorney and the county prosecutor and told them that if she had been that close to him for an hour, then she should be able to describe a particularly obvious identifying mark on his member. And if she could, he'd admit he was guilty and save them a lot of time and trouble.

But if they insisted on charging him, he would go to court and make them the laughingstock of the state and would file suit against the county and the sorority for false arrest.

The next morning, all charges were dropped and the girl left school soon after.

We never found out whether the mark was a mole, tattoo, scar or what, or if it even existed at all. But whatever it was, it's obvious that she either didn't see it or couldn't describe it accurately.

SpaceyCat: Where's gorgor with the pic of the guy with the dragon tattoo on his junk?

I'll pick up the slack on this one.


Not! And I mean NOT... SAFE... FOR... WORK!

damn... this thread has me seriously considering a prince albert or a tattoo ... something... just in case I get falsely accused of some shiat

doctorwormwood raped me and has a prince albert or a tattoo ... something... i can prove it!

Stay classy, England.

Hahahha. My brother has his dick tattooed plaid.

I went all out and just stapled a live lizard on. It was a lot cheaper than a tat and you should see the ladies eyes light up when its tongue starts flicking

NakedApe: I've got an asterisk on my penis

I have had a penis on my asterisk.

/ Vonnegut FTW

The article said..."Barry has a two inch long lizard tattoo running along his penis."

Was the lizard cold or was it a short lizard?

HighOnCraic: Megain: Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.
ahahahahaha

"Wendy? Mine says 'Welcome to Jamaica, mon, have a nice day!'"

/Probably not obscure.

That was the first dick joke I ever heard.

Did everyone miss the words under the picture, or did the last line of the article steal the show?

Zesty Mordant Sauce: HighOnCraic: Megain: Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.
ahahahahaha

"Wendy? Mine says 'Welcome to Jamaica, mon, have a nice day!'"

/Probably not obscure.

That was the first dick joke I ever heard.

I heard one similiar many years ago, but the tatoo read
" Shorty's bar and grill Albequerque New Mexico"

Disappointed that there are no pics of said dragon tatoo'd member.

bahknee: Did everyone miss the words under the picture, or did the last line of the article steal the show?

I didn't read the caption until you mentioned it. In context, also comedy gold.

As funny as the "seven-inch lizard" line is, the caption on the picture is better.

Sta-Hi: When I was in college, a guy in my dorm was accused by a sorority girl of forcing her to perform oral sex on him for over an hour while he held a knife to her throat. Although he had no alibi, he was completely unfazed by the accusation.

He met with his court-appointed attorney and the county prosecutor and told them that if she had been that close to him for an hour, then she should be able to describe a particularly obvious identifying mark on his member. And if she could, he'd admit he was guilty and save them a lot of time and trouble.

But if they insisted on charging him, he would go to court and make them the laughingstock of the state and would file suit against the county and the sorority for false arrest.

The next morning, all charges were dropped and the girl left school soon after.

We never found out whether the mark was a mole, tattoo, scar or what, or if it even existed at all. But whatever it was, it's obvious that she either didn't see it or couldn't describe it accurately.

Or he was one bad ass dude and pulled the ultimate bluff.

So is this a fake story, or just the last line?

Fluff Girl: NakedApe: I've got an asterisk on my penis

I have had a penis on my asterisk.

/ Vonnegut FTW

Big Lizard in your Backyard door?

Wow. Another factitious allegation of sexual impropriety. No shiat.

orat-on-a-stick: SpaceyCat: Where's gorgor with the pic of the guy with the dragon tattoo on his junk?

oh so NSFW/L/D/A (new window)

Homage to gorgor


Oh. Dear. Lord. That was just... I'm still blinking. Wow.

How would it affect the appearance of the tattoo later, if the tattooist happened to be hot?

historynow11: Proud.

I was waiting for that.

"What do you think, Mr. Dodge?"
"I think I'm gonna get my ass kicked, sir."
"Aw, don't think like that! Damn it to hell! Don't go by the book. Think like a pirate. I want a man with a tattoo on his dick. Have I got the right man?"
"By a strange coincidence, you do, sir."

Sheesh, public exposure? If I went through getting a tattoo on my penis, I'd at least want it to get me out of a rape charge.

I got a tattoo of a $100 bill on my dick because I heard women like to blow money.

Now everyone will have a tattoo of a lizard on their penis. So that tactic won't work anymore...

HighOnCraic: Megain: Before being reminded he was under oath Barry had wanted to claim the tattoo was seven inches long.
ahahahahaha

"Wendy? Mine says 'Welcome to Jamaica, mon, have a nice day!'"

/Probably not obscure.

Shorty? No, "Property of Shorty's Bar and Grill, Chattanooga, Tennessee"