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(TBO) Florida Teenage hit-and-runner uses Self-Arrest lane to be booked and released in twenty minutes. Would have been ten but the stupid machine wouldn't read her coupons and she had to wait for the assistant manager to override it   (www2.tbo.com) divider line 290
More: Florida  

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bubbaprog [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-10 02:45:18 PM  
skullkrusher: But whatever, the kid does not deserve to go to prison for an accident.

For the accident? No. For killing someone and then driving away without reporting the accident? Yes.

 
sxacho 2009-07-10 02:45:54 PM  
DslainteC: sxacho: Settle down. The victim was HOMELESS. Can't you read?

Point taken. I missed the part about her being homeless. That means she had no family and was unloved. Quite frankly, I'm glad she's dead.


Now you've got it.
images.usatoday.com

 
lehmac [TotalFark] 2009-07-10 02:46:38 PM  
Headso: lehmac: Headso: Is hitting a homeless person even illegal?

Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?

uh.. the linked article...


I just found it next to the little coonts picture. I didnt see it in the body of the article so thats why i asked smartie fartie

 
iollow 2009-07-10 02:46:50 PM  
So, I don't care one way or another if she pleas herself down to no time served, but who wants to bet she still has a license after all this?

I mean, can we at least keep her off the road a while?

 
dstanley 2009-07-10 02:46:53 PM  
Nevermind, the homeless woman was hit while she was jaywalking at night, which in my mind means she Darwin'd herself.

 
Antidamascus 2009-07-10 02:46:54 PM  
Hey, has anyone mentioned how she's hot and not of age?

Just wanted to slip that in.

Making sure we're all kept abreast of the situation.

/Penal system

 
MonkeyAngst 2009-07-10 02:46:55 PM  
lehmac: Headso: Is hitting a homeless person even illegal?

Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?


I was wondering that myself. It isn't mentioned in the article.

 
wyrlss 2009-07-10 02:46:58 PM  
DslainteC: sxacho: Settle down. The victim was HOMELESS. Can't you read?

Point taken. I missed the part about her being homeless. That means she had no family and was unloved. Quite frankly, I'm glad she's dead.


Is this an American-only attitude? Do people in other countries understand what "homeless" actually means?

 
tuna fingers 2009-07-10 02:47:13 PM  
dstanley: 4-11 and 97 pounds, about 20 of which is in her bra.


FAP
Good thing mom's back there to catch my spray.

 
MyNameIsMofuga 2009-07-10 02:47:14 PM  
Did she drive home?

 
dlwhite 2009-07-10 02:47:34 PM  
Joseph Hazelwood approves!

 
MonkeyAngst 2009-07-10 02:47:40 PM  
MonkeyAngst: lehmac: Headso: Is hitting a homeless person even illegal?

Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?

I was wondering that myself. It isn't mentioned in the article.


Oh, wait. There it is, in the photo caption. That's some fine copy editing, there, Lou.

 
ke7dkg [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-10 02:47:58 PM  
www2.tbo.com

I feel a twinge of fear when I look at this picture.

/Hot like magma

 
Mercutio74 2009-07-10 02:48:08 PM  
dstanley: Other articles say Tits McGhee hit the homeless woman while she was crossing the street.

Why was she crossing the street in her car? You're supposed to drive parallel to the sides of the road.

 
fenian- 2009-07-10 02:49:00 PM  
MonkeyAngst: Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?

I was wondering that myself. It isn't mentioned in the article


Try THE FIRST SENTENCE.

 
Headso 2009-07-10 02:49:09 PM  
lehmac: Headso: lehmac: Headso: Is hitting a homeless person even illegal?

Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?

uh.. the linked article...

I just found it next to the little coonts picture. I didnt see it in the body of the article so thats why i asked smartie fartie


Hey! it's fartie smartie asshole!

 
bighairyguy [TotalFark] 2009-07-10 02:49:58 PM  
dstanley: 4-11 and 97 pounds, about 20 of which is in her bra.

She was probably violating the "Must be sitting on phone book" provision of her license.

 
dstanley 2009-07-10 02:50:04 PM  
So if she would have stopped, called the cops and said, "Hey, this dumb biatch was jaywalking at night in front of me and I hit her," she'd be off scot-free?

 
fenian- 2009-07-10 02:50:10 PM  
fenian-: MonkeyAngst: Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?

I was wondering that myself. It isn't mentioned in the article

Try THE FIRST SENTENCE.


Ok. Sorry. No, not mentioned. It's in the photo caption.

 
tedbundee 2009-07-10 02:50:37 PM  
wyrlss: DslainteC: sxacho: Settle down. The victim was HOMELESS. Can't you read?

Point taken. I missed the part about her being homeless. That means she had no family and was unloved. Quite frankly, I'm glad she's dead.

Is this an American-only attitude? Do people in other countries understand what "homeless" actually means?


To be honest, its pretty f*cking hard to be homeless in the land of opportunity.

 
minoridiot 2009-07-10 02:50:56 PM  
www2.tbo.com

 
lehmac [TotalFark] 2009-07-10 02:51:11 PM  
I say eye for an eye
Have a homeless person get behind the wheel of a car and hit the snot nosed little butter faced beyatch.

even farking stevens

NEXT

 
tedbundee 2009-07-10 02:52:21 PM  
Antidamascus: Hey, has anyone mentioned how she's hot and not of age?

Just wanted to slip that in.

Making sure we're all kept abreast of the situation.

/Penal system


17 is legal age in a lot of states.

/just, not mine
//f*ck it, I'd hit it

 
lehmac [TotalFark] 2009-07-10 02:52:21 PM  
Headso: lehmac: Headso: lehmac: Headso: Is hitting a homeless person even illegal?

Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?

uh.. the linked article...

I just found it next to the little coonts picture. I didnt see it in the body of the article so thats why i asked smartie fartie

Hey! it's fartie smartie asshole!


Ok, Fartie Smartie Asshole. Ill never forget to leave that asshole part out again! Seriously, my bad dude.

 
Mercutio74 2009-07-10 02:53:59 PM  
dstanley: So if she would have stopped, called the cops and said, "Hey, this dumb biatch was jaywalking at night in front of me and I hit her," she'd be off scot-free?

Perhaps... it's not like the victim's going to do much testifying.

 
HMS_Blinkin 2009-07-10 02:55:02 PM  
bubbaprog: HMS_Blinkin: Bloodlust? She was 17, and ergo probably a crappy driver. Most likely an accident...and she turned herself in, saving the police time and money hunting her down. And "family?" The victim was homeless.

You haven't been following this story. It took the police two months of work to pin the crime on her enough to justify arresting her, even though everyone in town knew she did it. She refused to talk to police, despite having the wrecked car in her driveway.

I like the comments in TFA that say "let her free, it's not like she killed an animal or something, it was just a homeless person."


In that case, I can see the other side to this. I hadn't known the timeline behind this. I STILL don't think she deserves the death penalty, but a solid jail sentence might be in order. I hadn't realized she'd spent three months trying to weasel out of it; I thought she had just turned herself in the next morning.

 
skullkrusher 2009-07-10 02:55:30 PM  
bubbaprog: skullkrusher: But whatever, the kid does not deserve to go to prison for an accident.

For the accident? No. For killing someone and then driving away without reporting the accident? Yes.


however she is 17 years old. Facing 30 years in prison? C'mon. I am as much of a tough on crime guy as the next but seriously?

 
The Voice of Doom 2009-07-10 02:55:40 PM  
Boberto

This is the kind of person we want to see back on the streets...


..bent over the handle bar of her bicycle, wearing a low-cut shirt.

 
Headso 2009-07-10 02:56:56 PM  
lehmac: Headso: lehmac: Headso: lehmac: Headso: Is hitting a homeless person even illegal?

Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?

uh.. the linked article...

I just found it next to the little coonts picture. I didnt see it in the body of the article so thats why i asked smartie fartie

Hey! it's fartie smartie asshole!

Ok, Fartie Smartie Asshole. Ill never forget to leave that asshole part out again! Seriously, my bad dude.


If you'd like to go to that level of formality be my guest, usually only my butler does that.

 
Boberto 2009-07-10 02:57:22 PM  
HMS_Blinkin: Boberto: skullkrusher: DslainteC: If I understand this correctly, you can kill someone in a hit-and-run, book yourself in and out in minutes, get the original charge thrown out because of police indifference, and then use plea bargaining to serve no jail time. Good job, Florida! Now I know which state to visit the next time my bloodlust boils over. I could kill someone without consequence and be home in time for supper.

Can you imagine how the poor victim's family must feel about this farcical form of "justice"?

her family didn't care enough to make her not homeless so I am guessing they might issue a collective "meh".

Anyway, TFA says she could face 30 years in prison but it is likely she'll plea bargain down and serve no time. No mention that she was drunk or anything so her only real crime is leaving the scene of an accident... should she get Old Sparky for that?

Sure, why not? She "accidentally" killed someone with her vehicle and then figured it would be cool to just drive away, no problems right?

This is the kind of person we want to see back on the streets...am I right or what?

Good lord, are you seriously implying that she killed the homeless woman intentionally? Because you owe us all a big CITATION on that one. Nowhere in TFA does it say this was intentional. And yeah, she drove away, but what would you do if you were 17 and hit someone? Freak out, that's what. She didn't have the presence of mind at the time to do what those of us who are older than 17 would have done at the time. Which is exactly why she turned herself in later when she calmed down.


Driving carelessly is intentional, yes. You can't drive like a farking idiot unless you let your foot slam the peddle, your eyes wander while you change the iPod, txt your bff Jill. Sure it was an "accident" in the sense that she obviously didn't want to kill someone but clearly her actions, while driving, resulted in the death of an innocent person.
She's guilty of being a moran. Who's moranic actions led to the death of another human being. I never said she did it intentionally - if that was the case I'd just be making jokes about it.

ANECDOTE: driving in Nova Scotia in the summer of 2006 with a friend. He was not paying attention and he made a right hand turn at the bottom of a hill only to have a biker slam into the side of his car, flip over the roof, land and break his leg. We stopped - I was 19, he was 20. We got out and made sure the guy was alive, it was totally my buddies fault and he admitted it directly (to the victim, and police later) while I called 911 to report it.....

That is what people who aren't total farking idiots do. Can you actually sit there and try and defend snowflake's actions as "the right thing to do" because she's 17?

 
wyrlss 2009-07-10 02:57:33 PM  
skullkrusher: bubbaprog: skullkrusher: But whatever, the kid does not deserve to go to prison for an accident.

For the accident? No. For killing someone and then driving away without reporting the accident? Yes.

however she is 17 years old. Facing 30 years in prison? C'mon. I am as much of a tough on crime guy as the next but seriously?


How many people do you personally know that killed another human being and hid from the cops for three months?

 
Mephistopheles' Revenge 2009-07-10 02:57:34 PM  
FTA:
"Athan said it only works in cases were a reasonable bail has been set."

FTBoR:
"Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted."


So... all cases?

 
Cervantes3773 2009-07-10 02:58:01 PM  
lehmac: I say eye for an eye
Have a homeless person get behind the wheel of a car and hit the snot nosed little butter faced beyatch.

even farking stevens

NEXT


An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.

/And then who would develop our videogames?
//fear! buy! consume!

 
maudibjr 2009-07-10 02:58:10 PM  
fappable > homeless

 
lehmac [TotalFark] 2009-07-10 02:58:30 PM  
Headso: lehmac: Headso: lehmac: Headso: lehmac: Headso: Is hitting a homeless person even illegal?

Where did you read that poor woman was farking homeless?

uh.. the linked article...

I just found it next to the little coonts picture. I didnt see it in the body of the article so thats why i asked smartie fartie

Hey! it's fartie smartie asshole!

Ok, Fartie Smartie Asshole. Ill never forget to leave that asshole part out again! Seriously, my bad dude.

If you'd like to go to that level of formality be my guest, usually only my butler does that.


ha ha ha ha!! :)

 
hugheric 2009-07-10 02:58:57 PM  
Even young drivers should know if you hit a homeless person, You dig the hole.

 
skullkrusher 2009-07-10 02:59:06 PM  
wyrlss: skullkrusher: bubbaprog: skullkrusher: But whatever, the kid does not deserve to go to prison for an accident.

For the accident? No. For killing someone and then driving away without reporting the accident? Yes.

however she is 17 years old. Facing 30 years in prison? C'mon. I am as much of a tough on crime guy as the next but seriously?

How many people do you personally know that killed another human being and hid from the cops for three months?


I'm still on the lamb

 
OneFretAway [TotalFark] 2009-07-10 03:00:07 PM  
The Voice of Doom: Boberto

This is the kind of person we want to see back on the streets...

..bent over the handle bar of her bicycle, wearing a low-cut shirt.


preferably in a Catholic school skirt and knee-high white stockings.

/I am so going to heck for that

 
AtomicBurrito 2009-07-10 03:01:42 PM  
id hit that and run.

seriously though, teenagers should not be allowed to drive in or around a 50 mile radius of Hillsborough county, id be the first to turn my own license in if it meant putting a stop to all this bull. kids here are just too irresponsible to drive.

 
tedbundee 2009-07-10 03:01:51 PM  
OneFretAway: The Voice of Doom: Boberto

This is the kind of person we want to see back on the streets...

..bent over the handle bar of her bicycle, wearing a low-cut shirt.

preferably in a Catholic school skirt and knee-high white stockings.

/I am so going to heck for that


Nevermind having impure thoughts about a minor, you wouldn't wanna spell "hell" and possibly rot there...

 
Migrating Coconut 2009-07-10 03:03:08 PM  
when they come up with a self punishment lane, call me.

 
tedbundee 2009-07-10 03:03:47 PM  
AtomicBurrito: id hit that and run.

seriously though, teenagers should not be allowed to drive in or around a 50 mile radius of Hillsborough county, id be the first to turn my own license in if it meant putting a stop to all this bull. kids here are just too irresponsible to drive.


So long as she carpools with me, I'm okay with this.

 
Mephistopheles' Revenge 2009-07-10 03:03:49 PM  
Apparently farkers aren't the only ones that want blood.

Link (new window)


www.tampabay.com

 
Cervantes3773 2009-07-10 03:04:06 PM  
OneFretAway: The Voice of Doom: Boberto

This is the kind of person we want to see back on the streets...

..bent over the handle bar of her bicycle, wearing a low-cut shirt.

preferably in a Catholic school skirt and knee-high white stockings.

/I am so going to heck for that


Do go on....

 
Darth Mewling 2009-07-10 03:04:06 PM  
skullkrusher: wyrlss: skullkrusher: bubbaprog: skullkrusher: But whatever, the kid does not deserve to go to prison for an accident.

For the accident? No. For killing someone and then driving away without reporting the accident? Yes.

however she is 17 years old. Facing 30 years in prison? C'mon. I am as much of a tough on crime guy as the next but seriously?

How many people do you personally know that killed another human being and hid from the cops for three months?

I'm still on the lamb


Ewe...

 
Sin_City_Superhero 2009-07-10 03:04:44 PM  
skullkrusher: I'm still on the lamb

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Nobody wants to hear about your sex life.

 
sdaas 2009-07-10 03:04:53 PM  
Boberto: HMS_Blinkin: Boberto: skullkrusher: DslainteC:

ANECDOTE: driving in Nova Scotia in the summer of 2006 with a friend. He was not paying attention and he made a right hand turn at the bottom of a hill only to have a biker slam into the side of his car, flip over the roof, land and break his leg. We stopped - I was 19, he was 20. We got out and made sure the guy was alive, it was totally my buddies fault and he admitted it directly (to the victim, and police later) while I called 911 to report it.....

That is what people who aren't total farking idiots do. Can you actually sit there and try and defend snowflake's actions as "the right thing to do" because she's 17?


You never admit fault on an Accidient... NEVER. You can tell the truth and allow the police to accest it, but you never said. Opps I farked up.

 
chrisr64 2009-07-10 03:05:32 PM  
DemoKnite

As long as you have the money and are not a minority you should be good to go. Happy bloodlusting!


Two words, same state. Donte Stallworth. 24 days out of 30 behind bars.

If I were him I would appeal using this young lady as an example.

 
Linux_Perhaps 2009-07-10 03:05:36 PM  
Jesus Criminals! I'll go ahead and have a seat over there before I go to book myself... I'd utterly destroy that. The deity of your choice would envy the force with which I'd hit it.

 
Ruby'sMamma 2009-07-10 03:06:46 PM  
slurmed.com
Not so far fetched now....

 
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