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(AZCentral) Dumbass AZ man blows a smooth .40 with almost sober looking mugshot   (azcentral.com) divider line 178
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ApocoLypstick [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:25:58 PM  
He's muscular...which (to me anyway) kinda makes me think he's not a slobbering drunk. He's like a roughneck...work hard...play hard...
Could be wrong though...he could be a steroid riddled, tiny dicked drunkard.


I said hard...twice.

 
kth [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:26:06 PM  
I remember getting the breathalyzer for a young lawyers meeting. I argued that it was going to end up with us yelling "DRINK DRINK DRINK" at someone doing shots, and was assured we were way too grown up for such shenanigans.

Sure enough, we were screaming DRINK at one of the DAs whose BAC wouldn't budge, despite the ridiculous number of shots we were buying him.


/the taxi companies did a fine business that night
//not much work was done the next day
///Many shubbs and zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Sloar that day I can tell you.

 
eagles95 2009-07-09 08:26:29 PM  
Nice work 'zona. Time for Wisconsin to step back up and reclaim this throne. We applaud your abilities but we will get our title back.

 
Cog [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:26:44 PM  
State police here caught a motorcyclist after a 130mph chase and he was a .473 at the hospital. (he crashed the bike of course)

 
HopScotchNSoda 2009-07-09 08:26:49 PM  
museisluse: HopScotchNSoda: More recently, the police got her with .352 (plus THC) after she flipped her car, crashed it into a house, and setting the house alight from the car's flames. I managed to get her two years probation, 40 hours community service, and a total of about $2K for fine, court costs and fire service reimbursement. She had a prior, but it was more than ten years ago.

Interesting that you still keep tabs on her


We're still friends. I got Labour Day sexytime from her the past two years. She called me for help with the DUI case; what was I going to do? Say no? We all nead a cross to bear to give us a purpose; I guess she's mine.

 
cksewell [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:27:06 PM  
I would hit that

 
heater 2009-07-09 08:28:39 PM  
It's actually Bobby Labonte...you know how them NASCAR guys can do dope & drive. Axe Mayfield.

 
walnuts55 [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:32:38 PM  
Blew a .28 in Garden City KS, 12 years ago and got off the Cop left the force befor trial. Never have had more than 1 drink before driving. It was real dumb.

 
medius [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:33:02 PM  
skinned: A ribbon at least.

i don't know where you been, laddy, but i see you won first prize

 
brap [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:34:08 PM  
i253.photobucket.com

 
fernandez 2009-07-09 08:36:31 PM  
I calculated my BAC after a really hard night of drinking and wound up in the neighborhood of .36-.40

I have never been so disoriented in my whole life. On the plus side, I could stand and make it up and down steps

 
Stan_Marsh_the_Darsh 2009-07-09 08:41:35 PM  
Mugshot? - I don't look THAT good on my best day

 
John Buck 41 2009-07-09 08:43:01 PM  
AmazingRuss: YoungSwedishBlonde: .40 at 1PM? That guy was on a multiple day bender.

Sometimes you just wake up and say to yourself, "Today is a good day to start drinkin' early."


Which reminds me...ya can't drink all day unless ya start first thing in the morning.

 
Magorn 2009-07-09 08:44:00 PM  
jake_lex: I don't doubt that the guy was shiatfaced, but when I see these stories of someone blowing .40 on a breathalyzer, my feeling is more that the breathalizer farked up than them actually being that drunk.

At .40, you're probably in a coma.


You are, or I am, but a truly chronic alcoholic needs about a .25 or so just to be functional. At that level your or I would be stumbling and close to passing out; they need that much just to have steady hands and a perfectly normal demeanor. The fact that he blew this at 1 pm tells me there is a good likelihood this guy ain't a social drinker.

 
proxymoron 2009-07-09 08:55:06 PM  
.40 and still standing.
What's his Fark handle?

 
Crunch61 [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:57:59 PM  
I know for a fact that a .40 blood alcohol level causes severe drain bamage.

 
detfrost1 [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:58:05 PM  
i.azcentral.com

I'd so hit that (assuming his body is as good as his face).

But I bet unlike most people, he'd probably annoy me UNLESS he was drunk, and I had a bit of a buzz.

 
Sgt Otter [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 09:04:43 PM  
brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

Good thing the cops opted for a blood test after that reading. Something like that would most likely have been thrown out of court.


We had a hardcore alcoholic in my unit, blow a .52 and survive. He was in what was basically a light coma for 36 hours, and then conscious but disoriented for another 12 hours or so.

He was 34, about 5'8" and 170 lbs.

He actually passed most of the field-sobriety test, and the MPs assumed their breathalyzer was broken when he blew a .52, after trying a different machine, and testing the calibration, they rushed him to the ER, once they realized that was his legitimate BAC.

He didn't learn his lesson, though. He was back in the hospital with a .38 a week and a half later.

He found out later that he was about at a .18 to a .25 on a DAILY basis, at work.

His roommate gave us a sworn statement on his daily drinking, on a duty day:

Wake up at 0530, do a few shots of whiskey or rum, wash it down with a couple of beers, head to the morning accountability formation, then do Physical Training with the platoon. He could do a 6 or 8 mile run and come in at the front of the pack.

After PT, do a few more shots, three or so beers with breakfast. Shower up, put on his fatigues, fill up a flask with rum or whiskey. Show up to work at 0900, buy a few Cokes out of the machine, and add the booze from the flask. Finish off the flask, and he'd be weird and twitchy until lunch, as the DTs were starting to kick in.

Lunch break: Four or so shots of hard liquor, five or six beers, refill the flask.

Go back to work at 1300. Repeat the flask trick.

1700, off duty: drink an entire fifth of hard liquor, and drink an entire 24 pack or so until he passed out.

That was his DAILY routine on a work day. His weekends easily hit the high .30s to the mid .40s

 
vabeard 2009-07-09 09:06:00 PM  
He's hot.

/I'd buy his a drink.
//or 60 drinks...whatever it would take.

 
shooboxx77 2009-07-09 09:16:41 PM  
ApocoLypstick: He's muscular...which (to me anyway) kinda makes me think he's not a slobbering drunk. He's like a roughneck...work hard...play hard...
Could be wrong though...he could be a steroid riddled, tiny dicked drunkard.


I said hard...twice.


I think you maybe in love ...

two words though: whiskey dick
very very drunk men are no fun to take home for a variety of reasons but the inability to maintain is probably chief among them. Although they do like to cuddle after puking in your toilet. Its cute just dont let them breathe in your face or anything.

/not that I know about taking home drunk men or anything...

 
Sherjo311 2009-07-09 09:22:59 PM  
vabeard: He's hot.

/I'd buy his a drink.
//or 60 drinks...whatever it would take.


as long as you don't address yourself as your fark handle, you should be in the clear.

secondly, at what point would one theoretically have entirely replaced all blood with alcohol, and if that suggested individual blew into a breathalyzer, what number would it indicate?

/breathalyzers are so much fun at parties

 
ApocoLypstick [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 09:25:39 PM  
shooboxx77: love

Love? uh...no.
Lust? Sure.


Married...not dead, folks. There's a difference.

 
whammer 2009-07-09 09:26:19 PM  
i2.photobucket.com

You all missed the point. The reason the proportion of alcohol in his blood was high was because the proportion of water was low. It's freaking Arizona. Doing light work outside, you might suck down 5 gallons of water a day and not pee. Thinking about drinking a beer is like thinking about sucking on a lemon.

 
Quinzy 2009-07-09 09:26:57 PM  
This is off topic... But I just don't understand why anyone would find someone that is obviously this big a loser to be attractive. Maybe it is just me but any woman I date has to not be a tool for me to find them attractive.

/you people are nuts.

 
Seattle Rican 2009-07-09 09:27:21 PM  
Stay Cool Babylon: The toxic shock the next day, however, made wish that I really was dead. I don't mean that figuratively. I actually wished that death would take me into his embrace. Christ, easily the worst hangover ever. And I've been to Tijuana. Twice.

Wait a sec, toxic shock? *Checks Profile* Yep, it's a dude.

If you were sticking tampons up your butt, I'd say you were fairly drunk.

 
olddinosaur 2009-07-09 09:29:45 PM  
A friend of mine blew a .42, and then had to walk through the standard course where they videotape you walking a straight line, bending over, etc.

He did so well, to an untrained eye he looked totally sober.

They still use his videotape as training at the Police Academy.

 
ApocoLypstick [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 09:31:11 PM  
Quinzy: This is off topic... But I just don't understand why anyone would find someone that is obviously this big a loser to be attractive. Maybe it is just me but any woman I date has to not be a tool for me to find them attractive.

/you people are nuts.


eh...it's purely a "oh, nice face...nice musculature...hmm" kinda thing.

I would never take that seriously.

 
Scoop84 2009-07-09 09:34:41 PM  
shooboxx77: /not that I know about taking home drunk men or anything...

Wanna learn?

 
brap [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 09:35:12 PM  
whammer: You all missed the point. The reason the proportion of alcohol in his blood was high was because the proportion of water was low. It's freaking Arizona. Doing light work outside, you might suck down 5 gallons of water a day and not pee. Thinking about drinking a beer is like thinking about sucking on a lemon.

Good point. Also would explain why I've woken up a few times balls deep in a saguaro. Talk about a hike of shame...AWKWARD!

 
ApocoLypstick [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 09:36:41 PM  
brap: I've woken up a few times balls deep in a saguaro.

do you know how long those take to grow???

Go fark a bamboo plant, you heartless bastard!

 
John Buck 41 2009-07-09 09:39:10 PM  
Harry Freakstorm: I like to start my day with a couple of shots of Jager. For breakfast, I have a couple of beers and if there's time, eggs. Then, it's off to work. You need a lot of energy to compete in this work a day world, so I usually stop off for a smoothie. Plenty of vitamin and a couple of dollops of Jack Daniels to start the job.

I need to keep my edge, so when every one else stops for coffee, so do I. I like to Irish it up. Couple of cups and a couple of shots and I'm back to work.

Lunch? I don't get bogged down with all that food. You spend the whole afternoon just trying to process it. A nice buffet of some regional beers gives you plenty of energy. Just drop a shot of Vodak in to a couple of them.

Later, I'm in that afternoon meeting and everyone is looking down. I'm fresh and rarin' to go. A little hard cider gives me that afternoon rush.

Right after work. I head to the Gym. I mean Jim. As in Jim's bar. A couple of twelve ounce curls gives the guns a workout. Then I move on the the 24 ounce curls behind the 7/11.

In the evening, I dine like a pauper. Mad Dog 2020 or Boones farm. Then, assuming I haven't been arrested or found passed out on the cross town bus, it is a relaxing evening in front of the TV. I have a drinking game to make TV interesting: Every time there's a commercial that wants to sell me something, I take a shot of Everclear.

Of course, I end my day the same way I start it. A couple of shot a Jager and it's off to dreamland. I just hope those bugs don't eat my skin tonight. Maybe a couple of sips of cognac will keep them away.


Andre?

 
John Buck 41 2009-07-09 09:43:41 PM  
Quinzy: This is off topic... But I just don't understand why anyone would find someone that is obviously this big a loser to be attractive. Maybe it is just me but any woman I date has to not be a tool for me to find them attractive.

/you people are nuts.


Seriously, why are you here on Fark?

 
bmb_789 2009-07-09 09:44:49 PM  
Quinzy: This is off topic... But I just don't understand why anyone would find someone that is obviously this big a loser to be attractive. Maybe it is just me but any woman I date has to not be a tool for me to find them attractive.

/you people are nuts.



Why is this guy a loser? Because he blew a .40? The guy likes booze and clearly takes care of himself - you don't get a neck like that without putting in some time at the gym. And that makes him a loser? For all we know, his wife may have left him the night before... errr, wait, that might sort of make him a loser wouldn't it. Nevermind that.

Anyway, the point is I find some of the most shallow, dumb, and just plain batshiat crazy chicks to be the most attractive. Relationship material? Of course not. Twice that night and then once in the morning material? Oh hell yes.

 
shooboxx77 2009-07-09 10:16:30 PM  
Scoop84: shooboxx77: /not that I know about taking home drunk men or anything...

Wanna learn?


Are you in the mood to puke and then cuddle? ;)

 
shooboxx77 2009-07-09 10:17:18 PM  
bmb_789: Quinzy: This is off topic... But I just don't understand why anyone would find someone that is obviously this big a loser to be attractive. Maybe it is just me but any woman I date has to not be a tool for me to find them attractive.

/you people are nuts.


Why is this guy a loser? Because he blew a .40? The guy likes booze and clearly takes care of himself - you don't get a neck like that without putting in some time at the gym. And that makes him a loser? For all we know, his wife may have left him the night before... errr, wait, that might sort of make him a loser wouldn't it. Nevermind that.

Anyway, the point is I find some of the most shallow, dumb, and just plain batshiat crazy chicks to be the most attractive. Relationship material? Of course not. Twice that night and then once in the morning material? Oh hell yes.


Exactly. farked up, good looking people are the best to hang out with for a night or two. Do you want to plan a wedding around their drunken ramblings? Uhh no of course not. But the immediate, "Hey that person is hot and I would not mind seeing them nekkid!" doesn't mean you are committing to a lifetime of misery. It can just be a night of fun. eh- some people can take things as they are...others, find everything much more serious than it needs to be. I don't make absolute judgment calls on people like that. If someone has a drinking problem, they should take care of it for their own good and good of their close family/friends - but hell, that drunk might be a blast to be around and I am not going to point the "loser" finger at them. It is odd but humans seem to have a variety of aspects to them - more than just the one or two aspects that are readily apparent.

/yes I will have another glass of wine!
//my BAC isn't nearly high enough yet this evening.
///is not driving anywhere

 
Scoop84 2009-07-09 10:19:53 PM  
shooboxx77: Scoop84: shooboxx77: /not that I know about taking home drunk men or anything...

Wanna learn?

Are you in the mood to puke and then cuddle? ;)


No, but I'll fake it if you'll fake an orgasm.

 
I_Can't_Believe_It's_Not_Smegma 2009-07-09 10:27:55 PM  
shooboxx77 Scoop84

Get a room

 
mjackson 2009-07-09 10:53:26 PM  
There is a good reason that breath testing (to measure BAC) is not used as a diagnostic tool in a medical setting. Breath testing does not discriminate between the several alcohols that may be present in a patients breath sample. Patients in ketosis, whether the result of diabetic crisis or even some diets may well have enough ketone metabolites to produce a false reading, under certain circumstances acetone is reduced in the body to isopropanol by hepatic alcohol dehydrogenase (ADH). (1)

Serum testing is specific for ethanol and is considered the gold standard for legal and medical purposes.


1. International Journal of Obesity (2007) 31, 559-561. doi:10.1038/sj.ijo.0803444



* Ketosis produces a characteristic aroma which is easily mistaken for alcohol on a patients breath.

 
lokiminio 2009-07-09 11:06:51 PM  
For hardcore alcoholics it takes a .52 until you can tell they are drunk.

/Citation needed
//Learned this in DWI school
///Yeah, I'm a convicted drunk driver. Let the flaming begin.

 
soundguy 2009-07-09 11:09:41 PM  
I blew a .36 in '91. Was riding my Electra-glide at about 95mph down Interstate 90 in the mid-afternoon. Didn't look nearly as "self-aware" in my booking photo, though. I salute this guy.

For the record, I have neither the Harley nor the habit these days.

 
Encarnacion 2009-07-09 11:10:49 PM  
cmb53208: B-b-b-but I thought that big, tough, lean, mean, cunning Sheriff Joe was gonna put a stop to shenanigans like this?

Um, he isn't exactly the "type" for Sheriff Joe to get too excited about. Place of arrest, nationality and lack of lots of pigment make him an unlikely target, but somewhat likely to have voted for Joe.

 
Rinty 2009-07-09 11:17:52 PM  
The fishermen up here used to blow an easy .5 and serenade you right afterward. Nowadays though, there's a zero tolerance on the boats...so the drinkers stay away all season... or at least their captains hide them better.

 
DanRankin 2009-07-09 11:20:06 PM  
when i was 19, i used to finish a quart of Bacardi 151 or Lambs Old Navy in a night(4-5 hours). i've begun to wonder what my BAC was back then.

heh.

www.beveragewarehouse.comupload.wikimedia.org

/as much as i miss that warm fuzzy feeling, it wasn't wother passing out and falling into a gully while taking a leak.
//*sigh*

 
The Drizzt Do'Urden Experience 2009-07-09 11:20:44 PM  
thumbnails.hulu.com

 
LoneVVolf 2009-07-09 11:24:36 PM  
proser: However, I believe if you blow a .50 on a road-side stop you have legal right to climb onto the hood of the police car, raise your arms and shout, "I have PROOF!"

Good luck climbing onto anything larger than a fat chick with a .50 BAC...

 
huntercr 2009-07-09 11:29:39 PM  
This entire thread so far and no one has shopped up some gold face paint?

/damn shame...

 
Cowkitchen2 2009-07-09 11:30:12 PM  
Softens_hands_while_you_do_the_dishes: Sure the comparison to Joquin Phoenix is the visual winner but to hear these female cats scratch and moan, I figure he's closer to this

Titus Pullo
The Cleopatra episode was pretty hot.


omg, yes. Yes, it was. I'm not saying I would do this guy, but he is very nice looking -- even stinking drunk. Imagine how he cleans up :)

 
madgordy 2009-07-09 11:32:14 PM  
once again, I call all of you wimpy .4 and .5 guys amitures. A lady blew a .72 after being pulled over for SPEEDING near my house in Woodinville WA.

and yes they took her straight to the hospital to draw a pint.

 
shooboxx77 2009-07-09 11:40:34 PM  
Cowkitchen2: Softens_hands_while_you_do_the_dishes: Sure the comparison to Joquin Phoenix is the visual winner but to hear these female cats scratch and moan, I figure he's closer to this

Titus Pullo
The Cleopatra episode was pretty hot.

omg, yes. Yes, it was. I'm not saying I would do this guy, but he is very nice looking -- even stinking drunk. Imagine how he cleans up :)


agree and titus is SO hotter than Joaquin...

/scratches and moans

 
Alx_xlA 2009-07-09 11:42:49 PM  
I_Can't_Believe_It's_Not_Smegma: shooboxx77 Scoop84

Get a room


Kids these days...

 
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