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(AZCentral) Dumbass AZ man blows a smooth .40 with almost sober looking mugshot   (azcentral.com) divider line 178
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cmb53208 2009-07-09 07:41:09 PM  
B-b-b-but I thought that big, tough, lean, mean, cunning Sheriff Joe was gonna put a stop to shenanigans like this?

 
bwampler 2009-07-09 07:41:57 PM  
timmy_the_tooth: You know, I totally read this headline and thought you were talking about the handgun.

So, I'm thinking, "What's a 'smooth' 40 cal? Smooth barrel? What's going on here, why is he 'blowing' his 40 cal?"

I was disappointed that it's just another alcoholic story


Blowing a .40 doesn't make a man an alcoholic

 
prickle27 [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 07:43:44 PM  
.40 and still walking, that's almost applause worthy.

 
AmazingRuss 2009-07-09 07:44:07 PM  
bwampler: Blowing a .40 doesn't make a man an alcoholic

Nope. Alcoholics go to meetings.

 
LiaLia [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 07:44:15 PM  
BTW, no one actually uses the "Breathalyzer (TM)" any more.

 
Mugato [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 07:45:16 PM  
jake_lex: At .40, you're probably in a coma.

No, not always.

 
Insomnambulant 2009-07-09 07:45:52 PM  
By the time you're made to do the monkey tricks, the touch your nose, there's a foregone conclusion you're going to jail. The monkey tricks is part of their body of evidence if you dare fight the charge. The video is viewed as attached to the police report, but those are almost. unfailingly a pack of lies.

 
brap [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 07:46:34 PM  
bwampler: Blowing a .40 doesn't make a man an alcoholic

or a size queen.

 
realbigfun 2009-07-09 07:47:27 PM  
What a lightweight, you're not really drunk until you have missing hours and haven't passed out.

 
anonymuncule 2009-07-09 07:47:34 PM  
Behold the new King of Fark.

 
Betenoreus 2009-07-09 07:48:11 PM  
looks like Rob Riggle after a night out:

upload.wikimedia.org

 
H_is_for_Heretic 2009-07-09 07:48:20 PM  
pussy (new window)

And to be sure, start drinking early, and often enough, you can adapt to having that much booze in your bloodstream. Called "professional drunks". The type of people who will literally die if they stop cold-turkey.

 
iamrobot 2009-07-09 07:48:20 PM  
medius: brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

Not true. I've hit .50 before.

Yes, my blood was 1 proof.


math fail, you would have to blow four times that amount to be 1 proof.

/also breathalizer fail

 
medius [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 07:50:21 PM  
Stay Cool Babylon: The toxic shock the next day, however, made wish that I really was dead. I don't mean that figuratively. I actually wished that death would take me into his embrace.

thanks for describing my day

/no more drinking

 
Betenoreus 2009-07-09 07:51:10 PM  
iamrobot: medius: brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

Not true. I've hit .50 before.

Yes, my blood was 1 proof.

math fail, you would have to blow four times that amount to be 1 proof.

/also breathalizer fail


Uh, math fail FOR YOU. 0.5% alcohol is 1 proof, same way 40% alcohol whisky is 80 proof

 
medius [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 07:51:19 PM  
iamrobot: medius: brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

Not true. I've hit .50 before.

Yes, my blood was 1 proof.

math fail, you would have to blow four times that amount to be 1 proof.

/also breathalizer fail


i'll have what he's having

 
HopScotchNSoda 2009-07-09 07:51:25 PM  
brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

My ex-fiance scored a .40 in hospital once before she moved in with me. I'm told that she could still stand and walk, but not especially well.

She scored a .38-something in hospital whilst living with me. She made it down the stairs from our second story flat, down the gangway, through the gate, and went splat on the sidewalk. Two units of saline and a few hours' rest, she called me to pick her up.

More recently, the police got her with .352 (plus THC) after she flipped her car, crashed it into a house, and setting the house alight from the car's flames. I managed to get her two years probation, 40 hours community service, and a total of about $2K for fine, court costs and fire service reimbursement. She had a prior, but it was more than ten years ago.

What makes her scores even more impressive is that she is no small gal. It took a lot of boose to bring her BAL up that high.

 
iamrobot 2009-07-09 07:51:27 PM  
iamrobot: medius: brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

Not true. I've hit .50 before.

Yes, my blood was 1 proof.

math fail, you would have to blow four times that amount to be 1 proof.

/also breathalizer fail


oops. my math fail. you're right .5 is 1 proof.

 
Headless Medusa 2009-07-09 07:52:01 PM  
Who is .40 and why was he giving him a blowjob?

 
raptor22 2009-07-09 07:52:49 PM  
Working in an Emergency Department, I see these functional drunks all the time. A .4 BAC is definitely impressive, but it's nothing compared to the 0.67 and 0.54 that I saw a few months ago. It was a father (0.67 BAC) and son (0.54 BAC) who went Wyatt Earp on each other and got into a shotgun fight over a beer...son takes father's beer, father approves not, father shoots son with shotgun, father gets depressed that he just Cheney'd his son, turns shotgun on himself, misses, lands in my ER with his prize winning alcohol level.

 
iamrobot 2009-07-09 07:53:07 PM  
Ha. Oh well, off to get drunk.

 
Booboopriss 2009-07-09 07:53:23 PM  
Came here to see if anyone else thought he looks like Patrick Wharburton.www.patrickwarburton.net

 
djmed 2009-07-09 07:54:37 PM  
media.ebaumsworld.com

 
asmodeus224 2009-07-09 07:55:03 PM  
Yea he looks passably sober...but dollars to donuts you could hit him in th eface with a shovel and his expression wouldn't change.

He looks...numb.

 
Booboopriss 2009-07-09 07:55:26 PM  
Booboopriss: Came here to see if anyone else thought he looks like Patrick Wharburton.

Dang it... spelled his name wrong... "Warburton".

 
candriessen 2009-07-09 07:56:24 PM  
I'd hit it

 
vicious sack beating 2009-07-09 07:56:31 PM  
raptor22: Working in an Emergency Department, I see these functional drunks all the time. A .4 BAC is definitely impressive, but it's nothing compared to the 0.67 and 0.54 that I saw a few months ago. It was a father (0.67 BAC) and son (0.54 BAC) who went Wyatt Earp on each other and got into a shotgun fight over a beer...son takes father's beer, father approves not, father shoots son with shotgun, father gets depressed that he just Cheney'd his son, turns shotgun on himself, misses, lands in my ER with his prize winning alcohol level.

Pics or GTFO.

 
Bonanza Jellybean 2009-07-09 07:56:54 PM  
i25.tinypic.comi32.tinypic.com
Separated at birth?

 
Darthslurm 2009-07-09 07:56:57 PM  
It's so hot here, BAC don't meant shiat.

 
ApocoLypstick [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 07:57:01 PM  
asmodeus224: He looks...numb.


comfortably numb?

 
ApocoLypstick [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 07:57:57 PM  
Bonanza Jellybean: Separated at birth?

I'm sheltered....who is the one on the right?


Damn. just. Damn. I would do illegal things to/with him.

 
Bonanza Jellybean 2009-07-09 07:58:52 PM  
ApocoLypstick: Bonanza Jellybean: Separated at birth?

I'm sheltered....who is the one on the right?


Damn. just. Damn. I would do illegal things to/with him.


Gerard Butler.

 
John Buck 41 2009-07-09 08:01:32 PM  
timmy_the_tooth: You know, I totally read this headline and thought you were talking about the handgun.

So, I'm thinking, "What's a 'smooth' 40 cal? Smooth barrel? What's going on here, why is he 'blowing' his 40 cal?"

I was disappointed that it's just another alcoholic story


Re: .40---I thought the same thing, caliber-wise.

Re: Alcoholic---who says he's an alcoholic? Might've been his first time.

 
prickle27 [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:01:45 PM  
You chicks and/or gay guys are kinda creeping me out.

/Double standard. Yes, I have it.

 
ApocoLypstick [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:02:02 PM  
huh.

I will have to watch 300 some day.

 
ghare 2009-07-09 08:03:28 PM  
I'll hit .40 tonite.

 
sheumack 2009-07-09 08:03:33 PM  
i.azcentral.com

images.teamsugar.com

 
puppypants 2009-07-09 08:04:45 PM  
Hot

 
John Buck 41 2009-07-09 08:06:19 PM  
proser: medius: brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

Not true. I've hit .50 before.

Yes, my blood was 1 proof.

The home testers are often less accurate than the "official" ones, which have their own issues. However, I believe if you blow a .50 on a road-side stop you have legal right to climb onto the hood of the police car, raise your arms and shout, "I have PROOF!"


+1 doesn't come close to doing that justice. Bravo, sir.

 
playdate [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:09:31 PM  
prickle27: You chicks and/or gay guys are kinda creeping me out.

/Double standard. Yes, I have it.


Come on, no horrible tats makes him a standout here. Much better than our usual choices.
i257.photobucket.com

 
MichiganFTL 2009-07-09 08:16:53 PM  
Work in a detox facility. Patients come in plastered for admissions. I record their BAC. Our record is a walking .62, a .40 isn't even a call to the hospital for medical clearance anymore...

 
p51d007 2009-07-09 08:16:56 PM  
I ran a BAC on an alcoholic back in the late 70's popped for DWI.
If anyone remembers the old S&W "dial a drunk" BAC machines,
he "looked" sober, but popped a .37
"Sober" I bet alcoholics would show some level of alcohol in their system.

brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

Good thing the cops opted for a blood test after that reading. Something like that would most likely have been thrown out of court.

 
austerity101 2009-07-09 08:17:42 PM  
Diogenes: He's kinda hot. Probably easy to take advantage of now, too.

How YOU doin'?

/cut/jib, etc.

 
brightestfell [TotalFark] 2009-07-09 08:17:51 PM  
.40 Damn . . . Meh we can forgive him he's hittable.

 
John Buck 41 2009-07-09 08:18:23 PM  
zulius: I live 5 minutes from that intersection so I'm really getting a kick...

/.4? Whatever...
//Still a reject for drinkin' @ 1PM :p


Pretty sure he was drinking loooong before 1pm.

 
museisluse 2009-07-09 08:20:04 PM  
HopScotchNSoda: brigid_fitch: .40 BAC? How is he not dead? I don't think even serious alcoholics can have a .40 and still function.

My ex-fiance scored a .40 in hospital once before she moved in with me. I'm told that she could still stand and walk, but not especially well.

She scored a .38-something in hospital whilst living with me. She made it down the stairs from our second story flat, down the gangway, through the gate, and went splat on the sidewalk. Two units of saline and a few hours' rest, she called me to pick her up.

More recently, the police got her with .352 (plus THC) after she flipped her car, crashed it into a house, and setting the house alight from the car's flames. I managed to get her two years probation, 40 hours community service, and a total of about $2K for fine, court costs and fire service reimbursement. She had a prior, but it was more than ten years ago.

What makes her scores even more impressive is that she is no small gal. It took a lot of boose to bring her BAL up that high.


Interesting that you still keep tabs on her

 
Pvt Joker 2009-07-09 08:22:04 PM  
Stay Cool Babylon: Lol.

I've hit the neighborhood of .4 on one of those civilian testers. I was nowhere close to dead. In fact, I was lucid enough to remember taking the test. The toxic shock the next day, however, made wish that I really was dead. I don't mean that figuratively. I actually wished that death would take me into his embrace. Christ, easily the worst hangover ever. And I've been to Tijuana. Twice.


Either that tester is off or you have one hell of a tolerance. In college, I drank 15 shots of vodka (basically the whole bottle) in a half hour. I remember absolutely nothing after drinking the first 5 shots and had to go to the ER to get my stomach pumped. My blood test BAC was 0.29.

 
Harry Freakstorm 2009-07-09 08:23:17 PM  
i.azcentral.com

I like to start my day with a couple of shots of Jager. For breakfast, I have a couple of beers and if there's time, eggs. Then, it's off to work. You need a lot of energy to compete in this work a day world, so I usually stop off for a smoothie. Plenty of vitamin and a couple of dollops of Jack Daniels to start the job.

I need to keep my edge, so when every one else stops for coffee, so do I. I like to Irish it up. Couple of cups and a couple of shots and I'm back to work.

Lunch? I don't get bogged down with all that food. You spend the whole afternoon just trying to process it. A nice buffet of some regional beers gives you plenty of energy. Just drop a shot of Vodak in to a couple of them.

Later, I'm in that afternoon meeting and everyone is looking down. I'm fresh and rarin' to go. A little hard cider gives me that afternoon rush.

Right after work. I head to the Gym. I mean Jim. As in Jim's bar. A couple of twelve ounce curls gives the guns a workout. Then I move on the the 24 ounce curls behind the 7/11.

In the evening, I dine like a pauper. Mad Dog 2020 or Boones farm. Then, assuming I haven't been arrested or found passed out on the cross town bus, it is a relaxing evening in front of the TV. I have a drinking game to make TV interesting: Every time there's a commercial that wants to sell me something, I take a shot of Everclear.

Of course, I end my day the same way I start it. A couple of shot a Jager and it's off to dreamland. I just hope those bugs don't eat my skin tonight. Maybe a couple of sips of cognac will keep them away.

 
andrewe0003 2009-07-09 08:23:48 PM  
playdate: prickle27: You chicks and/or gay guys are kinda creeping me out.

/Double standard. Yes, I have it.

Come on, no horrible tats makes him a standout here. Much better than our usual choices.


Is this real?????

 
skinned 2009-07-09 08:25:10 PM  
benlonghair: Here it is. He had a .491 and was driving.

He should have gotten a MADD trophy or something for that. A ribbon at least.

 
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