err, maybe? Isn't this one of the most common warrants issued? What about this is asinine?

that'll show him

umm. ok. This happens all the time. I get to enter these warrants in the computer alot.

Well, that ought to teach him a lesson. I bet they'll go with a strongly worded letter next.

Myabe this guy is not a prime candidate for bail.

Every few years, our city has an amnesty for bench warrants, and there are always in the tens of thousands outstanding. They don't make any effort to arrest these people at all.

Yes, how asinine that the courts use the only means of trying to get the person to appear before them. What's next, they levy fines and incarcerate criminals!?

That charge alleges Isabelle sat in a parked van after dark causing public alarm.

What?

The linked story about the lobsters was better.

Not one, but two rare orange lobsters surface (pops)

It's a van!

You know what sorts of things happen in vans.

/Naughty, horrible things.

It still amazes me that anyone would simply not show up (provided they aren't trying to escape some great legal trouble) when called to appear at court. I worked on a jury and during selection, about a half dozen people simply didn't come in. We were told of another story where a juror, after being selected and sitting in on the trial for a couple weeks, decided not to show up and not to call one day simply because he didn't feel like it. The judge responded by sending a deputy to his home and I don't know what troubles he faced from there.

vertiaset: FTA: T(he) charge alleges Isabelle sat in a parked van after dark causing public alarm.

How in the world is this a crime in the United States of America?

Picture from the scene of the crime.

WFern: ...a juror, after being selected and sitting in on the trial for a couple weeks, decided not to show up and not to call one day simply because he didn't feel like it. The judge responded by sending a deputy to his home...

Judges really don't like that.

Outtaphase: err, maybe? Isn't this one of the most common warrants issued? What about this is asinine?

What about this is even Farkworthy, much less newsworthy? Is there NOTHING else happening in the world today?

People are still dying in China, Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan; we got serial killers in NC getting mysteriously shot by the cops; still have to bury Michael Jackson with Fred Phelps and the nuts of Westboro hovering like the Marabou storks they are; Sarah Palin hasn't left for Alaska yet; and Obama and Medvedyev are fighting about our missile defense system....

Tell the mods we're coming with the guillotine.

HunterT: It's a van!

You know what sorts of things happen in vans.

/Naughty, horrible things.

Fun, nasty fun.

Gyrfalcon: Sarah Palin hasn't left for Alaska yet

You're not seriously complaining about a lack of Sarah Palin threads, are you?

Have you seen the politics tab today? Palinpalooza.

His only crime was failing to obey U.S. law!

Dairy King: umm. ok. This happens all the time. I get to enter these warrants in the computer alot.

You write a news story about it, and it shows here. That is the point of FARK. You have not been here long, have you?

vertiaset: FTA: T(he) charge alleges Isabelle sat in a parked van after dark causing public alarm.

How in the world is this a crime in the United States of America?

He probably scared the local children. And apparently we have to think about them for one reason or another.

vertiaset: FTA: T(he) charge alleges Isabelle sat in a parked van after dark causing public alarm.

How in the world is this a crime in the United States of America?

That there is prime 'Group W Bench' material.

RE: the specific case of this article, a few questions:

vertiaset: FTA: T(he) charge alleges Isabelle sat in a parked van after dark causing public alarm.

How in the world is this a crime in the United States of America?

oop, one down already... Thanks Vert! So... what's next. FTA: "When Isabelle's absence was noted, the landlord told the court he had not heard from Isabelle with the exception of two threatening emails, one of which said the landlord 'should spend (his) time making sure (his) daughter is safe." Combined with the previous mention of vans... Well, it appears TheMaddMan has already covered that one too. Great. Now I'm feeling useless. *shakes tiny fist* So help me, if I post this and find that MaxxLarge or Pocket Ninja have created masterworks of poetry and prose encapsulating my sentiments in ways that they seem new and more viable to my own mind, I'll feel like a real jerk.

"Criminal loitering."

What. The. Fark.

Can we please get rid of all of these victimless (not to mention unconstitutionally vague) crimes already? I can think of a few other things we could use the money for right now.

WFern: It still amazes me that anyone would simply not show up (provided they aren't trying to escape some great legal trouble) when called to appear at court.


Sometimes there are reasons. I once received a jury summons at my old address 4 months after notifying the post office of my new address.

I've already failed to comment on this article, Twice!
/come and get me coppers

Fail.





that second one looks fake now that I think about it.

Jeff73: WFern: It still amazes me that anyone would simply not show up (provided they aren't trying to escape some great legal trouble) when called to appear at court.


Sometimes there are reasons. I once received a jury summons at my old address 4 months after notifying the post office of my new address.

Maybe he's dead and being used for orange lobster bait. He sounds like a fine fellow: owe $4,0000+ rent, try to blackmail landlord, and then threaten landlord's daughter. He may have threatened the family of somebody who didn't take it as well as the landlord.

I could see sitting in a parked van at night would cause public (the landlord) alarm if he was outside the landlord's or daughter's house after threatening with blackmail and harm to the daughter. It would be nice if the article actually included a little more info than just list the charges on the docket.

Fail tag scheduled to appear, fails to appear.

Clicked expecting this to be Jani Lane. Now embarrased I know who Jani Lane is.

/Stilll faps to Bobbi Brown in the Cherry Pie video.

syndre: Dairy King: umm. ok. This happens all the time. I get to enter these warrants in the computer alot.

You write a news story about it, and it shows here. That is the point of FARK. You have not been here long, have you?

according to our profiles, you beat me by about 3 months or so back in 2003.

His last name is Isabelle and he lives on Suzanne Drive. WTF?

Girly man. That's why he won't go to court. His name and address are positively embarrassing.

The one time I have had to appear before a judge, for a speeding ticket....There were a couple of jailbirds being arraigned for FTA warrants. One was a 5 time loser and the other a 3 time no show for that judge. The jailbirds and the judge were all buddy buddy as he issued bail for them to be released and gave them a future date to appear...I was dumb-founded. Naturally whne it was my time to step up I got the book thrown at me for going 5 over the speed limit. I was like WTF...first and only ticket after 20 years of driving.

This has got to be a first. Someone alert the media. Oh, wait.

Dairy King: according to our profiles, you beat me by about 3 months or so back in 2003.

I noticed that,
anyways, ;)
it's not news, its fark.com

Warrant issued for man who failed to appear in court for failing to appear in court

Is that like getting arrested for resisting arrest?

/dnrtfa

Uh, subby? And for that matter, reporteress Elizabeth Dinan?
This happens in dozens of courts, every day.

This could result in an endless loop

animalmagnet: Myabe this guy is not a prime candidate for bail.

Every few years, our city has an amnesty for bench warrants, and there are always in the tens of thousands outstanding. They don't make any effort to arrest these people at all.

Maybe that's the case where you are, but in my town it's very different. We had an idiot neighbor who had way too big of a german shepherd he kept chained way too close to the back of his house all the time, and it barked about 12 hours per day (no exaggeration). After months and months of pleading with them to accommodate the dog or get rid of it, we called the police to report a noise violation. This worked for a couple days, then return to normal. We called two more times, which evidently triggered an automatic court appearance.

We didn't want to be bad neighbors so we tried to stop the hearing, but it was no longer in our control. Day of the hearing he didn't show up, so the judge ordered the cops to pick him up right that moment. Turns out that moment was the middle of his son's 10th birthday party. Hauled off in cuffs in front of everybody.

Don't mess with medium-sized town judges.

Dairy King: umm. ok. This happens all the time. I get to enter these warrants in the computer alot.

Yeah. I've written software for law enforcement.

Public drunk, DUI/DWI, Bad checks, FTA (Failure To Appear) and pot possession always seem to make up about 70% of arrests. The vast majority of the remaining arrests are a result of idiotic things people do while drunk.

Mt._Honkey: animalmagnet: We had an idiot neighbor who had way too big of a german shepherd he kept chained way too close to the back of his house all the time, and it barked about 12 hours per day (no exaggeration). After months and months of pleading with them to accommodate the dog or get rid of it, we called the police to report a noise violation. This worked for a couple days, then return to normal. We called two more times, which evidently triggered an automatic court appearance.

We didn't want to be bad neighbors so we tried to stop the hearing, but it was no longer in our control. Day of the hearing he didn't show up, so the judge ordered the cops to pick him up right that moment. Turns out that moment was the middle of his son's 10th birthday party. Hauled off in cuffs in front of everybody.


And then? Did they hate you after that? How did the "not wanting to be a bad neighbor" thing turn out?

He is a bad neighbor you know. And a dick of a dog owner too, frankly.

Mt._Honkey: animalmagnet: Myabe this guy is not a prime candidate for bail.

Every few years, our city has an amnesty for bench warrants, and there are always in the tens of thousands outstanding. They don't make any effort to arrest these people at all.

Maybe that's the case where you are, but in my town it's very different. We had an idiot neighbor who had way too big of a german shepherd he kept chained way too close to the back of his house all the time, and it barked about 12 hours per day (no exaggeration). After months and months of pleading with them to accommodate the dog or get rid of it, we called the police to report a noise violation. This worked for a couple days, then return to normal. We called two more times, which evidently triggered an automatic court appearance.

We didn't want to be bad neighbors so we tried to stop the hearing, but it was no longer in our control. Day of the hearing he didn't show up, so the judge ordered the cops to pick him up right that moment. Turns out that moment was the middle of his son's 10th birthday party. Hauled off in cuffs in front of everybody.

Don't mess with medium-sized town judges.

This is why I read Fark. I

This guys is probably overqualified for the Chicago Police Department, but he should sign up anyway. He'll even get a paycheck.

Oops. Uncheck HTML enabled. Lets try that again.

"Quote stuff here"

This is why I read Fark. I <3 personal stories.

eggi541: The one time I have had to appear before a judge, for a speeding ticket....There were a couple of jailbirds being arraigned for FTA warrants. One was a 5 time loser and the other a 3 time no show for that judge. The jailbirds and the judge were all buddy buddy as he issued bail for them to be released and gave them a future date to appear...I was dumb-founded. Naturally whne it was my time to step up I got the book thrown at me for going 5 over the speed limit. I was like WTF...first and only ticket after 20 years of driving.

Apparently the problem is showing up in the first place, it only serves to draw attention to yourself...

Subby thought this was worth telling, and an admin agreed. That makes me sad.

Back when I was younger I had to sit in a courtroom for a while to get sentenced for egging cars, and like a dozen of these happened before I even got up there.

/oh, it happened twice. now it's so much more interesting

Dairy King: umm. ok. This happens all the time. I get to enter these warrants in the computer alot.

It isn't the bench warrant that is asinine, its the news print wasted informing the public of a possible criminal loiterer that may be among them.

so watch out he may be loitering on your street.

Wow this one time on ebay, there was a guy who's username was notgonnapayu and um he never paid either.

Maybe at some point the law should get a motherfarking clue, eh?

not even Canadian, but eh is obligatory, eh?

//slashies!!!!

Did someone say ENDLESS LOOP??

Dairy King: umm. ok. This happens all the time. I get to enter these warrants in the computer alot.

I work in the legal field and it actually does happen often, repeatedly failing to appear on a misdemeanor charge. However, I agree that after a third time, the judge should deny bond.

I'm not sure though, the judge may not be able to deny bond on a misdemeanor charge, despite the multiple failure to appears.

Here, in Worcester County, Maryland, they don't really go actively search out bench warrants. They do go and actively search out arrest warrants though.

I think these type of laws really vary from state to state.

^ I don't get it. Then again, I've been drinking.

vertiaset: FTA: T(he) charge alleges Isabelle sat in a parked van after dark causing public alarm.

How in the world is this a crime in the United States of America?

Well, if he had gone to court that might have been brought up. But refusing to cooperate with the law is a pretty sure way to ensure you DO have valid charges pressed against you...not exactly the first thing I would want to be sure of, but whatever drops your soap.

I'm looking forward to the followup headline which will probably say: "Warrant issued for man who failed to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court ..."

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

eggi541: The jailbirds and the judge were all buddy buddy as he issued bail for them to be released and gave them a future date to appear...I was dumb-founded. Naturally whne it was my time to step up I got the book thrown at me for going 5 over the speed limit. I was like WTF...first and only ticket after 20 years of driving.

Well, the only logical thing to do is to become a cancer on society in order to win the judge's brief amiable pity.

Or maybe you should be thankful your bad choices concluded in a fine of a few dollars and not in facing years of your life imprisoned (not to mention the crippling effects that that sort of thing has on any kind of career you could have when you get out).

kayanlau: I'm looking forward to the followup headline which will probably say: "Warrant issued for man who failed to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court for failing to appear in court ..."

That would be here in LA, except they just wait till you get arrested for something else, and nail you for all those failures all at once.

That charge alleges Isabelle sat in a parked van after dark causing public alarm.

Damn, he's hardcore.

On a largely-unrelated note, perhaps I'm just cynical, juvenile and impious but for some reason I always get a laugh when reading the police blotter section of newspapers and seeing arrest warrants issued for someone named Jesus when the reason is failure to appear.

/"Millerite: Great disappointment - Less rapture!"

...in a van, down by the river...