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(Globe and Mail) Obvious "After the pain of childbirth and the need to talk about our feelings, cellulite is the most common curse known to womankind"   (theglobeandmail.com) divider line 67
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2357 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jul 2009 at 2:36 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

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Day_Old_Dutchie 2009-07-04 06:19:00 PM  
Hey, a bit of marbling makes them tender!

 
Retort [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-04 06:30:58 PM  
Ah, men and women. We all share the same three curses. Four if you count women themselves.

 
Synaesthete 2009-07-04 06:33:29 PM  
Top three things women are worried about:

Douchebags who think possession of a penis entitles them to real-life-photoshopped vision of perfection.

Douchebags who think possession of a penis and persistence entitles them to the attention of any woman ever.

Period cramps.

/Yeah, yeah, sound fat, ugly, unlaid, whatever.

 
headstone 2009-07-04 06:41:14 PM  
Synaesthete: Top three things women are worried about:

Douchebags who think possession of a penis entitles them to real-life-photoshopped vision of perfection.

Douchebags who think possession of a penis and persistence entitles them to the attention of any woman ever.

Period cramps.

/Yeah, yeah, sound fat, ugly, unlaid, whatever.

.
.
.
Why would you actually worry about the first two? You sound perfectly capable of cutting them off at the knees....
.
.
.
/Daisy Cutters

 
ToxicMunkee [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 06:46:05 PM  
Mykeru: And the most common cures to mankind? That's right, having to listen to some women (thankfully, not all women) yap on like Chihuahuas about how hard they've got it.

On a serious note, I once heard Hillary Clinton (but it could have been most anyone) taking about the people hardest hit by war: That would be the widows and orphans.

The actually DEAD GUYS don't even get a mention.


Well they're DEAD. The survivors have to actually, you know, continue living with some hardship.

 
Alacritous [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 07:26:10 PM  
ToxicMunkee: The survivors have to actually, you know, continue living with some hardship

Living with death (new window)

 
hyperflame 2009-07-04 08:07:00 PM  
Mykeru: accelerus: but when you turn 42 and realize you don't have a damn thing to your name or a way to earn income then you are farked.

And your name is Elizabeth Wurtzel.


Good grief, I just spent 20 minutes reading your link. What a whore.

 
simpsonfan 2009-07-04 10:21:51 PM  
They could move to one of the loser countries where they'd have to wear a burka. Nobody will ever know they have cellulite.

 
Mangoose 2009-07-04 11:34:37 PM  
I thought crazy was the curse of womankind.

 
altinos 2009-07-05 12:21:30 AM  
Alacritous: Only because fashion magazines tell them it should be.

Yup, because these fashion magazines also force women to buy them and read them and pay attention to them.

 
Alacritous [TotalFark] 2009-07-05 01:44:45 AM  
altinos: Yup, because these fashion magazines also force women to buy them and read them and pay attention to them.

Have you ever seen a group of women huddled around a bridal magazine? one of those great big thick ones? It's like crack to them.

 
NicoFinn [TotalFark] 2009-07-05 05:05:35 AM  
slepygryhnd: moothemagiccow: I'm just tired of the magazines telling the redheads they need to tan. Not everyone's into mexican girls.

Thanks! I have people say rude things about how pale I am all the time.


Seconded here! I can't tell you how many times in my life people have told me I'd look better with a tan.

Also, this little gem from the article made me giggle:

"...it's a well-known fact that French women are obsessed with their own asses."

 
koan 2009-07-05 07:28:45 AM  
NicoFinn:

Also, this little gem from the article made me giggle:

"...it's a well-known fact that French women are obsessed with their own asses."


When people use "it's a well-known fact" in a sentence, what follow is usually BS.

 
girljen 2009-07-05 10:08:54 AM  
Fark_Guy_Rob: Being attractive or not is, for many women, the largest contributing factor in their quality of life. If you are an attractive woman you can pretty much float through life and have all of your needs met by various men who appreciate your attractiveness.


Well, that explains my problem.

/seriously, though, periods totally biatchslap cellulite
//raising kids can be very trying sometimes too
///and that whole marriage thing? very difficult
///\my slashies laugh at your cellulite worries!

 
Aidan [TotalFark] 2009-07-05 11:53:41 AM  
girljen: /seriously, though, periods totally biatchslap cellulite
//raising kids can be very trying sometimes too
///and that whole marriage thing? very difficult
///\my slashies laugh at your cellulite worries!


Hah. Funny. Kids and marriage were what I immediately thought of.
Not so much the periods thing cause I get them less than 1/30. If I did, they'd be up there in the top 3 too.

 
Aidan [TotalFark] 2009-07-05 11:54:32 AM  
Mangoose: I thought crazy was the curse of womankind.

Ehhh. Well put.

 
Man Going His Own Way 2009-07-05 12:39:56 PM  
Get an actual full-time job. Think about it, ladies parasites.

 
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