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(Washington Post) Dumbass Amazingly, the transcript of the Sarah Palin resignation speech is even more of a train wreck than the spoken version   (voices.washingtonpost.com) divider line 256
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furiousxgeorge [TotalFark] 2009-07-03 11:11:29 PM  
Hi Alaska, I appreciate speaking directly TO you, the people I serve, as your Governor.

People who know me know that besides faith and family, nothing's more important to me than our beloved Alaska. Serving her people is the greatest honor I could imagine.

I want Alaskans to grasp what can be in store for our state. We were purchased as a territory because a member of President Abe Lincoln's cabinet, William Seward, providentially saw in this great land, vast riches, beauty, strategic placement on the globe, and opportunity. He boldly looked "North to the Future". But he endured such ridicule and mocking for his vision for Alaska, remember the adversaries scoffed, calling this "Seward's Folly". Seward withstood such disdain as he chose the uncomfortable, unconventional, but RIGHT path to secure Alaska, so Alaska could help secure the United States.

Alaska's mission - to contribute to America. We're strategic IN the world as the air crossroads OF the world, as a gatekeeper of the continent. Bold visionaries knew this - Alaska would be part of America's great destiny.

Our destiny to be reached by responsibly developing our natural resources. This land, blessed with clean air, water, wildlife, minerals, AND oil and gas. It's energy! God gave us energy.

So to serve the state is a humbling responsibility, because I know in my soul that Alaska is of such import, for America's security, in our very volatile world. And you know me by now, I promised even four years ago to show MY independence... no more conventional "politics as usual".

And we are doing well! My administration's accomplishments speak for themselves. We work tirelessly for Alaskans.

We aggressively and responsibly develop our resources because they were created to be used to better our world... to HELP people... and we protect the environment and Alaskans (the resource owners) foremost with our policies.

Here's some of the things we've done:

We created a petroleum integrity office to oversee safe development. We held the line FOR Alaskans on Point Thomson - and finally for the first time in decades - they're drilling for oil and gas.

We have AGIA, the gasline project - a massive bi-partisan victory (the vote was 58 to 1!) - also succeeding as intended - protecting Alaskans as our clean natural gas will flow to energize us, and America, through a competitive, pro-private sector project. This is the largest private sector energy project, ever. THIS is energy independence.

And ACES - another bipartisan effort - is working as intended and industry is publicly acknowledging its success. Our new oil and gas "clear and equitable formula" is so Alaskans will no longer be taken advantage of. ACES incentivizes NEW exploration and development and JOBS that were previously not going to happen with a monopolized North Slope oil basin.

We cleaned up previously accepted unethical actions; we ushered in bi-partisan Ethics Reform.

We also slowed the rate of government growth, we worked with the Legislature to save billions of dollars for the future, and I made no lobbyist friends with my hundreds of millions of dollars in budget vetoes... but living beyond our means today is irresponsible for tomorrow.

We took government out of the dairy business and put it back into private-sector hands - where it should be.

We provided unprecedented support for education initiatives, and with the right leadership, finally filled long-vacant public safety positions. We built a sub-Cabinet on Climate Change and took heat from Outside special interests for our biologically-sound wildlife management for abundance.

We broke ground on the new prison.

And we made common sense conservative choices to eliminate personal luxuries like the jet, the chef, the junkets... the entourage.

And the Lt. Governor and I said "no" to our pay raises. So much success in this first term - and with this success I am proud to take credit... for hiring the right people! Our goal was to achieve a gasline project, more fair oil and gas valuation, and ethics reform in four years. We did it in two. It's because of the people... good public servants surrounding the Governor's office, with servants' hearts and astounding work ethic... THEY are Alaska's success!

We are doing well! I wish you'd hear MORE from the media of your state's progress and how we tackle Outside interests - daily - SPECIAL interests that would stymie our state. Even those debt-ridden stimulus dollars that would force the heavy hand of federal government into our communities with an "all-knowing attitude" - I have taken the slings and arrows with that unpopular move to veto because I know being right is better than being popular. Some of those dollars would harm Alaska and harm America - I resisted those dollars because of the obscene national debt we're forcing our children to pay, because of today's Big Government spending; it's immoral and doesn't even make economic sense!

Another accomplishment - our Law Department protected states' rights - TWO huge U.S. Supreme Court reversals came down against that liberal Ninth Circuit, deciding in OUR state's favor over the last two weeks. We're protectors of our Constitution - federalists protect states' rights as mandated in 10th amendment.

But you don't hear much of the good stuff in the press anymore, do you?

Some say things changed for me on August 29th last year - the day John McCain tapped me to be his running-mate - I say others changed.

Let me speak to that for a minute.

Political operatives descended on Alaska last August, digging for dirt. The ethics law I championed became their weapon of choice. Over the past nine months I've been accused of all sorts of frivolous ethics violations - such as holding a fish in a photograph, wearing a jacket with a logo on it, and answering reporters' questions.

Every one - all 15 of the ethics complaints have been dismissed. We've won! But it hasn't been cheap - the State has wasted THOUSANDS of hours of YOUR time and shelled out some two million of YOUR dollars to respond to "opposition research" - that's money NOT going to fund teachers or troopers - or safer roads. And this political absurdity, the "politics of personal destruction" ... Todd and I are looking at more than half a million dollars in legal bills in order to set the record straight. And what about the people who offer up these silly accusations? It doesn't cost them a dime so they're not going to stop draining public resources - spending other peoples' money in their game.

It's pretty insane - my staff and I spend most of our day dealing with THIS instead of progressing our state now. I know I promised no more "politics as usual," but THIS isn't what anyone had in mind for ALASKA.

If I have learned one thing: LIFE is about choices!

And one chooses how to react to circumstances. You can choose to engage in things that tear down, or build up. I choose to work very hard on a path for fruitfulness and productivity. I choose NOT to tear down and waste precious time; but to build UP this state and our country, and her industrious, generous, patriotic, free people!

Life is too short to compromise time and resources... it may be tempting and more comfortable to just keep your head down, plod along, and appease those who demand: "Sit down and shut up", but that's the worthless, easy path; that's a quitter's way out. And a problem in our country today is apathy. It would be apathetic to just hunker down and "go with the flow".

Nah, only dead fish "go with the flow".

No. Productive, fulfilled people determine where to put their efforts, choosing to wisely utilize precious time... to BUILD UP.

And there is such a need to BUILD up and FIGHT for our state and our country. I choose to FIGHT for it! And I'll work hard for others who still believe in free enterprise and smaller government; strong national security for our country and support for our troops; energy independence; and for those who will protect freedom and equality and LIFE... I'll work for and campaign for those PROUD to be American, and those who are INSPIRED by our ideals and won't deride them.

I WILL support others who seek to serve, in or out of office, for the RIGHT reasons, and I don't care what party they're in or no party at all. Inside Alaska - or Outside Alaska.

But I won't do it from the Governor's desk.

I've never believed that I, nor anyone else, needs a title to do this - to make a difference... to HELP people. So I choose, for my State and my family, more "freedom" to progress, all the way around... so that Alaska may progress... I will not seek re-election as Governor.

And so as I thought about this announcement that I wouldn't run for re-election and what it means for Alaska, I thought about how much fun some governors have as lame ducks... travel around the state, to the Lower 48 (maybe), overseas on international trade - as so many politicians do. And then I thought - that's what's wrong - many just accept that lame duck status, hit the road, draw the paycheck, and "milk it". I'm not putting Alaska through that - I promised efficiencies and effectiveness! ? That's not how I am wired. I am not wired to operate under the same old "politics as usual." I promised that four years ago - and I meant it.

It's not what is best for Alaska.

I am determined to take the right path for Alaska even though it is unconventional and not so comfortable.

With this announcement that I am not seeking re-election... I've determined it's best to transfer the authority of governor to Lieutenant Governor Parnell; and I am willing to do so, so that this administration - with its positive agenda, its accomplishments, and its successful road to an incredible future - can continue without interruption and with great administrative and legislative success.

My choice is to take a stand and effect change - not hit our heads against the wall and watch valuable state time and money, millions of your dollars, go down the drain in this new environment. Rather, we know we can effect positive change outside government at this moment in time, on another scale, and actually make a difference for our priorities - and so we will, for Alaskans and for Americans.

Let me go back to a comfortable analogy for me - sports... basketball. I use it because you're naïve if you don't see the national full-court press picking away right now: A good point guard drives through a full court press, protecting the ball, keeping her eye on the basket... and she knows exactly when to pass the ball so that the team can WIN. And I'm doing that - keeping our eye on the ball that represents sound priorities - smaller government, energy independence, national security, freedom! And I know when it's time to pass the ball - for victory.

I have given my reasons candidly and truthfully... and my last day won't be for another few weeks so the transition will be very smooth. In fact, we will look to swear Sean in - in Fairbanks at the conclusion of our Governor's picnics.

I do not want to disappoint anyone with my decision; all I can ask is that you TRUST me with this decision - but it's no more "politics as usual".

Some Alaskans don't mind wasting public dollars and state time. I do. I cannot stand here as your Governor and allow millions upon millions of our dollars go to waste just so I can hold the title of Governor. And my children won't allow it either. ? Some will question the timing. ? Let's just say, this decision has been in the works for awhile...

In fact, this decision comes after much consideration, and finally polling the most important people in my life - my children (where the count was unanimous... well, in response to asking: "Want me to make a positive difference and fight for ALL our children's future from OUTSIDE the Governor's office?" It was four "yes's" and one "hell yeah!" The "hell yeah" sealed it - and someday I'll talk about the details of that... I think much of it had to do with the kids seeing their baby brother Trig mocked by some pretty mean-spirited adults recently.) Um, by the way, sure wish folks could ever, ever understand that we ALL could learn so much from someone like Trig - I know he needs me, but I need him even more... what a child can offer to set priorities RIGHT - that time is precious... the world needs more "Trigs", not fewer.

My decision was also fortified during this most recent trip to Kosovo and Landstuhl, to visit our wounded soldiers overseas, those who sacrifice themselves in war for OUR freedom and security... we can ALL learn from our selfless Troops... they're bold, they don't give up, they take a stand and know that LIFE is short so they choose to NOT waste time. They choose to be productive and to serve something greater than SELF... and to build up their families, their states, our country. These Troops and their important missions - those are truly the worthy causes in this world and should be the public priority with time and resources and NOT this local / superficial wasteful political bloodsport.

May we ALL learn from them!

*((Gotta put First Things First))*

First things first: as Governor, I love my job and I love Alaska. It hurts to make this choice but I am doing what's best for Alaska. I've explained why... though I think of the saying on my parents' refrigerator that says "Don't explain: your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe you anyway."

But I have given my reasons... no more "politics as usual" and I am taking my fight for what's right - for Alaska - in a new direction.

Now, despite this, I don't want any Alaskan dissuaded from entering politics after seeing this REAL "climate change" that began in August... no, we NEED hardworking, average Americans fighting for what's right! And I will support you because we need YOU and YOU can effect change, and I can too on the outside.

We need those who will respect our Constitution where government's supposed to serve from the BOTTOM UP, not move toward this TOP DOWN big government take-over... but rather, will be protectors of individual rights - who also have enough common sense to acknowledge when conditions have drastically changed and are willing to call an audible and pass the ball when it's time so the team can win! And that is what I'm doing!

Remember Alaska... America is now, more than ever, looking North to the Future. It'll be good. So God bless you, and from me and my family - to ALL Alaska - you have my heart.

And we will be in the capable hands of our Lieutenant Governor, Sean Parnell. And Lieutenant General Craig Campbell will assume the role of Lieutenant Governor. And it is my promise to you that I will always be standing by, ready to assist. We have a good, positive agenda for Alaska.

In the words of General MacArthur said, "We are not retreating. We are advancing in another direction."

 
furiousxgeorge [TotalFark] 2009-07-03 11:50:00 PM  
Oh yeah, and she says specifically that ALL of her children voted. Apparently, Trig is at least smart enough to know his Mom has no business in a position of power.

 
Bathia_Mapes [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:02:20 AM  
i38.tinypic.com

 
DamnYankees [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:03:33 AM  
Meanwhile, Obama was busy writing his 2004 Convention Speech himself, and his Philadelphia Race Speech, and etc.

 
I_Love_Verdi [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:12:13 AM  
furiousxgeorge: Oh yeah, and she says specifically that ALL of her children voted. Apparently, Trig is at least smart enough to know his Mom has no business in a position of power.

You owe me a new keyboard sir.

 
CtrlAltDelete [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:13:18 AM  
furiousxgeorge: Hi Alaska

furiousxgeorge: People who know me know

furiousxgeorge: I

furiousxgeorge: was

furiousxgeorge: purchased as a territory

furiousxgeorge: because

furiousxgeorge: some

furiousxgeorge: providentially saw

furiousxgeorge: beauty

furiousxgeorge: But

furiousxgeorge: We aggressively

furiousxgeorge: dismissed

furiousxgeorge: those

furiousxgeorge: wearing

furiousxgeorge: My

furiousxgeorge: silly

furiousxgeorge: fish

furiousxgeorge: jacket.

 
Bucky Katt [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:17:32 AM  
What color crayon did she use?

 
Occam's Chainsaw [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:18:17 AM  
furiousxgeorge: In the words of General MacArthur said, "We are not retreating. We are advancing in another direction."

What are they marching toward, Hell? Obscurity? Ruin?

 
IMDWalrus [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:27:36 AM  
CtrlAltDelete: furiousxgeorge: We aggressively

furiousxgeorge: dismissed

furiousxgeorge: those

furiousxgeorge: wearing

furiousxgeorge: My

furiousxgeorge: silly

furiousxgeorge: fish

furiousxgeorge: jacket.


It's beautiful.

 
Occam's Chainsaw [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:30:22 AM  
CtrlAltDelete: You, sir, are an artist.

 
GAT_00 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:32:20 AM  
CtrlAltDelete: fish jacket

...right.

You know, it does kinda read like Nixon's "Last Speech," though heavily adapted.

 
furiousxgeorge [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:33:48 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: furiousxgeorge: In the words of General MacArthur said, "We are not retreating. We are advancing in another direction."

What are they marching toward, Hell? Obscurity? Ruin?


In the words of Napoleon Bonaparte said, "Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily."

 
deadapostle [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:33:54 AM  
CtrlAltDelete

If you weren't already on my favorites list, I'd add you now.

 
ragekage [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:34:13 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: CtrlAltDelete: You, sir, are an artist.

Occam's Chainsaw: CtrlAltDelete: You, sir, are an artist.

Occam's Chainsaw: CtrlAltDelete: You, sir, are an artist.

/bears

 
ZombieStomper [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:42:58 AM  
Freepers are hitting an astounding level of crazy tonight:

Sarah Palin just made a covert Declaration Of War
n/a | 7/3/09 | Ron C
Posted on July 3, 2009 11:02:00 PM CDT by Ron C.

Ever notice? When she's angry, she starts talking a little faster, her eyes lids narrow a tad, and she talks through lips that are a bit closer together - and that faint frown of hers becomes almost permanent, yet a smile remains. She displayed all of those signs today. She didn't say it in so many words, but if I don't miss my bet, Sarah Palin just declared all-out war on the left - and believe me, she can wage that war like no other - as has been well demonstrated.

 
GAT_00 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:50:38 AM  
ZombieStomper: Freepers are hitting an astounding level of crazy tonight:

That is some good crazy. Since you're already there, mind giving the rest of us a link so we don't have to look around in Crazyville?

 
baka-san [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:51:43 AM  
The only 2 things I likes about her were that...

...She makes my governor look semi sane.

She killed any chance of McCain winning.

I'm betting she is being forced out.

 
DamnYankees [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:52:43 AM  
baka-san: ...She makes my governor look semi sane.

Sorry, I don't think anyone can do that.

 
SpeshilEdjukashin [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:55:17 AM  
Try as I do, I can't understand the personal attacks on this poor strong woman...

 
CtrlAltDelete [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:56:31 AM  
baka-san: She killed any chance of McCain winning.

I like Obama, I voted for Obama, but McCain would have been a decent president, I think. I feel bad for the poor bastard. I didn't realize it at the time, but he didn't have a chance in hell after choosing Palin.

 
baka-san [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:57:39 AM  
CtrlAltDelete: baka-san: She killed any chance of McCain winning.

I like Obama, I voted for Obama, but McCain would have been a decent president, I think. I feel bad for the poor bastard. I didn't realize it at the time, but he didn't have a chance in hell after choosing Palin.


In 2000, would have voted for him.

 
GAT_00 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:59:13 AM  
SpeshilEdjukashin: Try as I do, I can't understand the personal attacks on this poor strong woman...

I just gigglesnorted.

*Threadjack*
Firefox 3.5 killed Farkit and now I'm sad.
*Threadjack off*

 
Bucky Katt [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:02:55 AM  
SpeshilEdjukashin: Try as I do, I can't understand the personal attacks on this poor strong woman...

you're into MILFs, aren't you?

 
Occam's Chainsaw [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:03:11 AM  
CtrlAltDelete: I like Obama, I voted for Obama, but McCain would have been a decent president, I think. I feel bad for the poor bastard. I didn't realize it at the time, but he didn't have a chance in hell after choosing Palin.

My original proposal for the '08 election, back in Jan/Feb: If it turned out to be Obama / McCain, I'd be in the delightful position of having to choose the better of two good choices, instead of the usual lesser of two evils.

How quickly McCain turned into Bush III killed that one in the crib.

 
ZombieStomper [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:06:10 AM  
GAT_00: Ask and ye shall recieve...

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2285258/posts

 
vartian [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:06:43 AM  
SpeshilEdjukashin: Try as I do, I can't understand the personal attacks on this poor strong woman...

She says crazy, confusing, indecipherable things. We call her nuts. You say we are attacking her personally.

She has a journalism degree. That took her several colleges to get. And when asked what newspapers she reads, she says "All of them" and then cannot name one. We infer she may not be the brightest candidate in the race. You say we are attacking her personally.

She thinks the world is 6000 years old. She has no concept how government works on a federal level. She has no concept of foriegn diplomacy. She believes that gays can be "cured" through prayer. We scream "Holy fark, this person cannot lead us" and you scream that we are attacking her personally.

Maybe, just maybe, she is not fit for leadership. Maybe that fact is so farking obvious that the rest of us can do nothing else but mock out of outright disbelief that anyone could possibly take her seriously.

Or maybe you are right. Maybe she is just this nice woman that we should all give a hug and the Vice Presidency to. Maybe we are all assholes, jealous of her awesomeness and super-faith.

Or maybe you are a thin skinned whinny little biatch who cannot take it when a public figure he likes is ridiculed, just as all public figures are.

 
GAT_00 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:07:37 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: My original proposal for the '08 election, back in Jan/Feb: If it turned out to be Obama / McCain, I'd be in the delightful position of having to choose the better of two good choices, instead of the usual lesser of two evils.

How quickly McCain turned into Bush III killed that one in the crib.


Hell, I would have thought seriously about John McCain circa-2000 or so against Obama. I'm pretty certain I would still have voted for Obama, but I actually would have thought about it for a second. But for me, I had that problem early in the Democratic primaries between Obama, Hillary and Kucinich, until Hillary proved she was batshiat insane and evil, and I always knew that Kucinich could never win.

 
GAT_00 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:13:21 AM  
ZombieStomper: GAT_00: Ask and ye shall recieve...

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2285258/posts


Oh man, they are even crazier than I remember. That shiat is hilarious. Some gems:

Conservatives are often no smarter than those on the left, and that may be what destroys this nation... unless they learn from history and God's word.

We are all sick of the state run media. No need for them. We have Sarah, no filters, no pundits, no common-taters, we have Sarah speaking directly to us.

"we slowed the rate of government growth."
She can rightly say that about what has taken place in AK.

She's been under assault constantly by an extremely fearful Left, and when I say Left that includes all of the Left meaning RINO's as well.

More like a Declaration of Freedom...like the shots fired at Lexington and Concord.

 
wejash [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:14:36 AM  
She's working on the theory that walking away from the only gig that could show she could run a government so she can try to get elected to run the government?

Because being out of any office and simply a talking head worked so well for Mitt Rommney, Rudy Guiliani and John Edwards, among others.

She has no one but her Wasila Hillbilly Mafia managing her "campaign" does she? She's George W. Bush without Karl Rove.

 
Mordant [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:16:27 AM  
GAT_00: no common-taters

What the hell is wrong with a plain potato ?

 
shivashakti [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:16:50 AM  
wejash: She has no one but her Wasila Hillbilly Mafia managing her "campaign" does she?

She doesn't need anyone to manage her campaign.
She has JESUS!

 
LordPomposity 2009-07-04 01:28:18 AM  
furiousxgeorge: And Lieutenant General Craig Campbell will assume the role of Lieutenant Governor.

I bet Obama thinks this is a military coup.

 
Donald_McRonald 2009-07-04 01:53:54 AM  
LordPomposity: furiousxgeorge: And Lieutenant General Craig Campbell will assume the role of Lieutenant Governor.

I bet Obama thinks this is a military coup.


Well, Alaska is essentially a tinpot petro-state, so it would make sense.

 
robmilmel [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 02:04:47 AM  
As I said in another thread, that was (what she hopes would be) her obituary, not a resignation. I'd bet at this point she's trying to cut a deal where resigning will keep her out of jail...nothing else makes sense, even in a Palinesque way.

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 02:12:46 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: What are they marching toward, Hell? Obscurity? Ruin?

The GOP: Boldly Going Forward Because They Can't Find Reverse

 
BuckTurgidson 2009-07-04 02:23:32 AM  
Mentat: Occam's Chainsaw: What are they marching toward, Hell? Obscurity? Ruin?

The GOP: Boldly Going Forward Because They Can't Find Reverse


The GOP: Powering Full-Speed Through the Farmer's Market of America's Future

 
vartian [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 02:30:07 AM  
Mentat: Occam's Chainsaw: What are they marching toward, Hell? Obscurity? Ruin?

The GOP: Boldly Going Forward Because They Can't Find Reverse


Theeeeeeers...Klingons on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow, Klingons on the starboard bow...starboard bow, Jim!

/fark you for making me sing that in my head for the next 6 farking hours. The only joy I get n ow is that I have inflicted one of you with it as well.

 
yogaFLAME [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 02:42:31 AM  
BuckTurgidson: The GOP: Powering Full-Speed Through the Farmer's Market Country Kitchen Buffet of America's Future

Yep.

 
Crosshair [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 02:43:56 AM  
Bathia_Mapes

That would explain how he was able to dupe millions into voting for him with nothing but empty and vauge rhetoric. The people continue to love him even when they dislike his policies.

Either that or it is a dark plot by Palpatine to keep Skywalker off balance and distracted while he builds his power base. (Or Virgin Island beach home, one of the two.) Could Palpatine be controlling Skywalker without his knowing it? Hmmmmmm.

Of course with Joe Biden as Hans Solo, it's no wonder the hyperdrive on the Millennium Falcon had such shoddy reliability.

I would say the Palin/Jar Jar comparison is accurate, though Jar jar was at least able to be somewhat helpful in an indirect and chaotic manner if you looked at his performance over the long term.

 
Darth_Lukecash [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:01:12 AM  
I gotta say, I wasn't expecting this....

 
JPJ007 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:09:16 AM  
GAT_00: *Threadjack*
Firefox 3.5 killed Farkit and now I'm sad.
*Threadjack off*


Farkit lives, thanks to NoseBrain.

http://home.comcast.net/~nosebrain/farkit-24g2.xpi

 
Sgt Otter [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:21:16 AM  
ZombieStomper: Freepers are hitting an astounding level of crazy tonight:

Sarah Palin just made a covert Declaration Of War
n/a | 7/3/09 | Ron C
Posted on July 3, 2009 11:02:00 PM CDT by Ron C.

Ever notice? When she's angry, she starts talking a little faster, her eyes lids narrow a tad, and she talks through lips that are a bit closer together - and that faint frown of hers becomes almost permanent, yet a smile remains. She displayed all of those signs today. She didn't say it in so many words, but if I don't miss my bet, Sarah Palin just declared all-out war on the left - and believe me, she can wage that war like no other - as has been well demonstrated.


Her Waterloo was a soft-focus fluff piece with Katie Couric, who wasn't even trying to rattle her.

 
beve [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:41:17 AM  
"If I have learned one thing: life is about choices!"

Sarah Palin is pro-choice?

 
beve [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:44:01 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: furiousxgeorge: In the words of General MacArthur said, "We are not retreating. We are advancing in another direction."

What are they marching toward, Hell? Obscurity? Ruin?



Tonight I say: we must move forward, not backward; upward not forward; and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!

 
clifton [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:50:20 AM  
Still don't understand the worship of this woman...

 
Joliet_Jake 2009-07-04 03:52:33 AM  
Oh, hey, is this the new Sarah Palin thread?

i43.tinypic.com

Thread, Sarah. Thread. Jesus, how many times do I have to explain this to you?

 
Chelsea Clinton Is Carrot Top's Lost Twin 2009-07-04 03:54:33 AM  
beve: "If I have learned one thing: life is about choices!"

Sarah Palin is pro-choice?


blogs.smh.com.au

 
Superjoe 2009-07-04 03:57:17 AM  
I heard various clips of it over and over on the radio today. I had to turn it off before I had an aneurysm or something.

 
carnifex2005 2009-07-04 03:58:26 AM  
And here her speech translated into Jive...


'Sup, dude Alax'a, ah' appreciate rappin' directly TO ya', de sucka's ah' serve, as yo' Governo'. Sucka's who know me know dat besides faid and family, nodin's mo'e impo'tant t'me dan our beloved Alax'a. WORD! Servin' ha' sucka's be de greatest hono' ah' could imagine. I wants' Alax'ans t'grasp whut kin be in sto'e fo' our state. We wuz purchased as some territo'y cuz' a memba' of Super-dude Abe Lincoln's cabinet, William Seward, providentially saw in dis great land, vast riches, beauty, strategic placement on de globe, and oppo'tunity. Slap mah fro! He boldly looked "No'd t'de Future". But he endured such ridicule and mockin' fo' his vision fo' Alax'a, rememba' de adversaries scoffed, callin' dis "Seward's Folly". Seward widstood such disdain as he chose da damn uncomfo'table, unconvenshunal, but RIGHT alley t'secure Alax'a, so's Alax'a could help secure da damn United States. Sucka's who know me know dat besides faid and family, nodin's mo'e impo'tant t'me dan our beloved Alax'a. WORD! Alax'a's mission - t'contribute t'America. WORD! We's strategic IN de wo'ld as de air crossroads OF de wo'ld, as some gatekeepuh' uh de continent. Man! Bold visionaries knowed dis - Alax'a would be part uh America's great destiny. Slap mah fro! Our destiny t'be reached by responsibly developin' our natural resources. Dis land, blessed wid clean air, booze, wildlife, minerals, AND oil and gas. It's energy! Right on! God gave us energy. Slap mah fro! So's to serve da damn state be a humblin' responsibility, cuz' I know in mah' soul dat Alax'a be of such impo't, fo' America's security, in our real volatile wo'ld. And ya' know me by now, ah' promised even foe years ago t'show MY independence... no mo'e convenshunal "politics as usual". And we is hangin' well! Right on! Mah' administrashun's accomplishments rap fo' demselves. We wo'k tirelessly fo' Alax'ans. We aggressively and responsibly develop our resources cuz' dey wuz created t'be used t'betta' our wo'ld... t'HELP sucka's... and we protect da damn environment and Alax'ans (de resource owners) fo'emost wid our policies. Here's some uh de doodads we've done, dig dis: We created some petroleum integrity office t'oversee safe development. Man! We held da damn line FOR Alax'ans on Point Domson - and finally fo' de fust time in decades - dey're drillin' fo' oil and gas. We gots AGIA, de gasline project - some massive bi-partisan victo'y (de vote wuz 58 t'1! Right on!) - also succeedin' as intended - protectin' Alax'ans as our clean natural gas gots'ta flow t'energize us, and America, drough some competitive, pro-private secto' project. Man! Dis be de largest private secto' energy project, ever. Ah be baaad... THIS be energy independence. And ACES - anoda' bipartisan effo't - be wo'kin' as intended and industry be publicly acknowledgin' its success. Our new oil and gas "clear and equitable fo'mula" be so Alax'ans gots'ta no longa' be snatchn advantage of. ACES incentivizes NEW 'esplo'ashun and development and JOBS dat wuz previously not goin' t'happen wid some monopolized No'd Slope oil basin. 'S coo', bro. We cleaned down previously accepted unedical acshuns; we ushered in bi-partisan Edics Refo'm. WORD! We also slowed da damn rate uh guv'ment growd, we wo'ked wid de Legislature t'save billions uh dollars fo' de future, and ah' made no lobbyist homeys wid mah' hundreds uh millions uh dollars in budget vetoes... but livin' beyond our means today be irresponsible fo' tomo'row, so cut me some slack, Jack. We took guv'ment out uh de dairy business and put it back into private-secto' hands - where it should be. We provided unprecedented suppo't fo' educashun initiatives, and wid de right leadership, finally filled long-vacant public safety posishuns. We built some sub-Cabinet on Climate Change and took heat fum Outside special interests fo' our biologically-sound wildlife management fo' abunboogie. We broke ground on de new prison. 'S coo', bro. And we made common sense conservative choices t'eliminate sucka'al luxuries likes de jet, de chef, de junkets... de entourage. And da damn Lt. Man! Governo' and ah' said "no" t'our pay raises. So's much success in dis fust term - and wid dis success ah' am proud t'snatch credit. Man!.. fo' hirin' de right sucka's! Right on! Our goal wuz t'achieve some gasline project, mo'e fair oil and gas valuashun, and edics refo'm in foe years. We dun did it in two. 'S coo', bro. It's cuz' of de sucka's... baaaad public servants surroundin' de Governo's office, wid servants' hearts and astoundin' wo'k edic. Co' got d' beat!.. THEY is Alax'a's success! Right on! We is hangin' well! Right on! ah' wish ya'd hear MORE fum de media uh yo' state's progress and how we tackle Outside interests - daily - SPECIAL interests dat would stymie our state. Even dose debt-ridden stimulus dollars dat would fo'ce da damn heavy hand uh federal guv'ment into our communities wid an "all-knowin' attitude" - ah' have snatchn de slin's and arrows wid dat unpopular move t'veto cuz' I know bein' right be betta' dan bein' popular. Ah be baaad... Some uh dose dollars would harm Alax'a and harm America - ah' resisted dose dollars cuz' of de obscene nashunal debt we's fo'cin' our children t'pay, cuz' of today's Big Guv'ment spendin'; it's immo'al and duzn't even make economic sense! Right on! Anoda' accomplishment - our Law Department protected states' rights - TWO huge U.S. Supreme Court reversals came waaay down against dat liberal Nind Circuit, decidin' in OUR state's favo' upside de last two weeks. We's protecto's uh our Constitushun - federalists protect states' rights as mandated in 10d amendment. Man! But ya' duzn't hear much uh de baaaad stuff in de press no mo', do ya'? Some say doodads changed fo' me on August 29d last year - de day Raz'tus McCain tapped me t'be his runnin'-mate - ah' say oders changed. Let me rap t'dat fo' some minute. Political opuh'tives descended on Alax'a last August, diggin' fo' dirt. Man! De edics law ah' championed became deir weapon uh choice. Ova' de past nine monds I've been accused uh all so'ts uh frivolous edics violashuns - such as holdin' some fish in some photograph, wearin' some jacket wid some logo on it, and answerin' repo'ters' quesshuns. Every one - all 15 uh de edics complaints gots been dismissed. We've won! Right on! But it ain't been cheap - de State gots wuzted THOUSANDS uh hours uh YOUR time and shelled out some two million uh YOUR dollars t'respond t'"opposishun research" - dat's bre'd NOT goin' t'fund head homeboys o' troopuh's - o' safa' roads. And dis political absurdity, de "politics uh sucka'al destrucshun" ... Todd and ah' are lookin' at mo'e dan half some million dollars in legal bills in o'da' to set da damn reco'd straight. Man! And whut about da damn sucka's who offa' up dese silly accusashuns? It duzn't cost dem some dime so's dey're not goin' t'stop drainin' public resources - spendin' oda' sucka'ss' bre'd in deir game. It's fine insane - mah' staff and ah' spend most uh our day dealin' wid THIS instead uh progressin' our state now, so cut me some slack, Jack. ah' know ah' promised no mo'e "politics as usual," but THIS ain't whut any sucka had in mind fo' ALASKA. If ah' have learned one doodad: LIFE be about choices! Right on! And one chooses how t'react t'circumstances. You's kin choose t'engage in doodads dat tear waaay down, o' build down. ah' choose t'wo'k real hard on some pad fo' fruitfulness and productivity. Slap mah fro! ah' choose NOT t'tear waaay down and wuzte precious time; but t'build UP dis state and our country, and ha' industrious, generous, patriotic, free sucka's! Right on! Life be too sho't t'compromise time and resources... it may be temptin' and mo'e comfo'table t'plum keep yo' haid waaay down, plod along, and appease dose who demand, dig dis: "Sit waaay down and shut down", but dat's de wo'dless, easy alley; dat's some quitter's way out. Man! And some problem in our country today be apady. Slap mah fro! It would be apadetic t'plum hunka' waaay down and "go wid de flow". Nah, only wasted fish "go wid de flow". No. 'S coo', bro. Productive, fulfilled sucka's determine where t'put deir effo'ts, choosin' t'wisely utilize precious time... t'BUILD UP. And dere be such some need t'BUILD down and FIGHT fo' our state and our country. Slap mah fro! ah' choose t'FIGHT fo' it! Right on! And I'll wo'k hard fo' oders who still recon' in free enterprise and smalla' guv'ment; strong nashunal security fo' our country and suppo't fo' our troops; energy independence; and fo' dose who gots'ta protect freedom and equality and LIFE... I'll wo'k fo' and campaign fo' dose PROUD t'be American, and dose who is INSPIRED by our ideals and won't deride dem. WORD! I WILL suppo't oders who seek t'serve, in o' out uh office, fo' de RIGHT reasons, and ah' duzn't care whut party dey're in o' no party at all. Inside Alax'a - o' Outside Alax'a. WORD! But ah' won't do it fum de Governo's desk. Ya' know? I've neva' recon'd dat I, no' any sucka else, needs some title t'do dis - t'make some difference... t'HELP sucka's. So's I choose, fo' mah' State and mah' family, mo'e "freedom" t'progress, all de way around... so's dat Alax'a may progress... ah' gots'ta not seek re-elecshun as Governo'. And so's as ah' dought about dis announcement dat ah' wouldn't run fo' re-elecshun and whut it means fo' Alax'a, ah' dought about how much fun some governo's gots as lame ducks... travel around da damn state, t'de Lowa' 48 (maybe), overseas on internashunal trade - as so's many politicians do. 'S coo', bro. And den ah' dought - dat's whut's wrong - many plum accept dat lame duck status, hit da damn road, draw de paycheck, and "milk it". I'm not puttin' Alax'a drough dat - ah' promised efficiencies and effectiveness! Right on! ? Dat's not how ah' am wired. ah' ain't wired t'opuh'te unda' de same old "politics as usual." ah' promised dat foe years ago - and ah' meant it. Man! It's not whut be best fo' Alax'a. WORD! I's gots'ta be determined t'snatch de right alley fo' Alax'a even dough it be unconvenshunal and not so's comfo'table. Wid dis announcement dat ah' ain't seekin' re-elecshun... I've determined it's best t'transfa' de audo'ity uh governo' t'Lieutenant Governo' Parnell; and ah' am willin' t'do so, so's dat dis administrashun - wid its positive agenda, its accomplishments, and its successful road t'an incredible future - kin continue widout interrupshun and wid great administrative and legislative success. Mah' choice be to snatch some stand and effect change - not hit our haids against da damn wall and watch valuable state time and bre'd, millions uh yo' dollars, go waaay down de drain in dis new environment. Man! Rader, we know we kin effect positive change outside guv'ment at dis moment in time, on anoda' scale, and actually make some difference fo' our prio'ities - and so's we will, fo' Alax'ans and fo' Americans. Let me go back t'a comfo'table analogy fo' me - spo'ts... hoopball. ah' use it cuz' youse naive if ya' duzn't see da damn nashunal full-court press pickin' away right now, dig dis: A baaaad point guard rolls drough some full court press, protectin' de ball, keepin' ha' eye on de hoop... and she knows 'esactly when t'pass de ball so's dat da damn team kin WIN. And I'm hangin' dat - keepin' our eye on de ball dat represents sound prio'ities - smalla' guv'ment, energy independence, nashunal security, freedom! Right on! And ah' know when it's time t'pass de ball - fo' victo'y. Slap mah fro! I gots given mah' reasons kindun didly and trudfully. Slap mah fro!.. and mah' last day won't be fo' anoda' few weeks so's de transishun gots'ta be real smood. In fact, we gots'ta look t'swear Sean in - in Fairbanks at da damn conclusion uh our Governo's picnics. I do not wanna disappoint any sucka wid mah' decision; all ah' can ax' be dat ya' TRUST me wid dis decision - but it's no mo'e "politics as usual". Some Alax'ans duzn't mind wuztin' public dollars and state time. ah' do. 'S coo', bro. ah' cannot stand here as yo' Governo' and allow millions downon millions uh our dollars go t'wuzte plum so ah' can hold da damn title uh Governo'. And mah' children won't allow it eider. Ah be baaad... ? Some gots'ta quesshun de timin'. ? Let's plum say, dis decision gots been in de wo'ks fo' awhile... In fact, dis decision comes afta' much considerashun, and finally pollin' de most impo'tant sucka's in mah' life - mah' children (where da damn count wuz unanimous... well, in response t'ax'in': "Want me t'make some positive difference and fight fo' ALL our children's future fum OUTSIDE de Governo's office?" It wuz foe "yes's" and one "hell yeah! Right on!" De "hell yeah" sealed it - and someday I'll rap about da damn details uh dat. Man!.. ah' dink much uh it had t'do wid de kids seein' deir baby broda' Trig mocked by some fine mean-spirited adults recently. Slap mah fro!) Um, by de way, sho' man wish folks could ever, eva' dig it dat we ALL could learn so's much fum some sucka likes Trig - ah' know he needs me, but ah' need him even mo'e... whut some child kin offa' to set prio'ities RIGHT - dat time be precious... de wo'ld needs mo'e "Trigs", not fewer. Ah be baaad... Mah' decision wuz also fo'tified durin' dis most recent trip t'Kosovo and Landstuhl, t'visit our wounded soldiers overseas, dose who sacrifice demselves in war fo' OUR freedom and security. Slap mah fro!.. we kin ALL learn fum our selfless Troops... dey're bold, dey duzn't cut up, dey snatch some stand and know dat LIFE be sho't so's dey choose t'NOT wuzte time. Dey choose t'be productive and t'serve sump'n greata' dan SELF... and t'build down deir families, deir states, our country. Slap mah fro! Dese Troops and deir impo'tant missions - dose is truly de wo'dy causes in dis wo'ld and should be da damn public prio'ity wid time and resources and NOT dis local / supuh'ficial wuzteful political bloodspo't. Man! May we ALL learn fum dem! Right on! *((Gotsta put Fust Doodads Fust))* Fust doodads fust: as Governo', ah' love mah' job and ah' love Alax'a. WORD! It hurts t'make dis choice but ah' am hangin' whut's best fo' Alax'a. WORD! I've 'esplained why. Slap mah fro!.. dough ah' dink uh de sayin' on mah' parents' refrigerato' dat says "Duzn't 'esplain, dig dis: yo' homeys duzn't need it and yo' enemies won't recon' ya' anyway. Slap mah fro!" But ah' have given mah' reasons... no mo'e "politics as usual" and ah' am takin' mah' fight fo' whut's right - fo' Alax'a - in some new direcshun. Now, despite dis, ah' duzn't wants' any Alax'an dissuaded fum enterin' politics afta' seein' dis REAL "climate change" dat began in August. Man!.. no, we NEED hardwo'kin', average Americans fightin' fo' whut's right! Right on! And ah' gots'ta suppo't ya' cuz' we need YOU and YOU kin effect change, and ah' can too on de outside. We need dose who gots'ta respect our Constitushun where guv'ment's supposed t'serve fum de BOTTOM UP, not move toward dis TOP DOWN big guv'ment snatch-over. Ah be baaad..... but rader, gots'ta be protecto's uh individual rights - who also gots enough common sense t'acknowledge when condishuns gots drastically changed and is willin' t'call an audible and pass de ball when it's time so's de team kin win! Right on! And dat be whut I'm hangin'! Right on! Rememba' Alax'a. WORD!.. America be now, mo'e dan ever, lookin' No'd t'de Future. It'll be baaaad. So's God bless ya', and fum me and mah' family - t'ALL Alax'a - ya' gots mah' heart. Man! And we gots'ta be in de capable hands uh our Lieutenant Governo', Sean Parnell. And Lieutenant General Craig Campbell gots'ta assume da damn role uh Lieutenant Governo'. And it be my promise t'ya' dat ah' gots'ta always be standin' by, eyebally t'assist. Man! We gots some baaaad, positive agenda fo' Alax'a. WORD! In de wo'ds uh General MacBuckwheat said, "We is not retreatin'. We is advancin' in anoda' direcshun."

 
Gangway Fathead 2009-07-04 03:59:54 AM  
And so a new political party is born.

 
vartian [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:00:15 AM  
clifton: Still don't understand the worship of this woman...

There are people like me (and I assume you) who like it when our leaders are clearly smarter then us, at least in the realm of things that matter in a leadership position.

I have no problem saying President Obama is smarter then I. So is his wife, for that matter. But there are many, many people who want to feel as smart as their leaders. That their leaders are "just regular people."

For them, Palin is a natural. At least that's the only farking sense I can make of it. The idea of her in any sort of national political power structure scares me as much as if I was in the position.

 
FishingWithFredo 2009-07-04 04:01:36 AM  
Even after multiple watches/listens, it leaves you looking like:

img12.imageshack.us

It's almost like somebody just off camera is holding Palin at gunpoint and making her read it.

 
furiousxgeorge [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:01:44 AM  
beve: In the words of Kang said, "We must move forward, not backward; upward not forward; and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!"

FTFY. Use the proper Palinistic syntax!

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 04:03:31 AM  
dtdstudios.com

 
Dr. Mojo PhD [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:04:19 AM  
CtrlAltDelete: furiousxgeorge: My

furiousxgeorge: silly

furiousxgeorge: fish

furiousxgeorge: jacket.


Oh hi, I love you. It's like you just pinched my sense of humour's bum and winked. Now you're all green with "My silly fish jacket" next to your name. Isn't that nice?

 
andrewagill 2009-07-04 04:05:36 AM  
A good point guard drives through a full court press, protecting the ball, keeping her eye on the basket... and she knows exactly when to pass the ball so that the team can WIN.

i235.photobucket.com

But inflation isn't that bad right now.

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 04:07:04 AM  
I'll bet Russia looks pretty good to her right now.

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 04:07:44 AM  
andrewagill:
But inflation isn't that bad right now.


God, I wish I still had my WIN button. Even as a kid who didn't really understand what inflation was, I knew that wearing a button wasn't going to solve any economic problems.

Yay Ford.

 
BasqueBastard 2009-07-04 04:08:15 AM  
i173.photobucket.com
It is delicious when served cold...

/it is very cold in Wasilla

//I wonder if she is even still in Alaska? She could be anywhere by now with that Cessna float plane.

 
ODDwhun 2009-07-04 04:09:00 AM  
Bathia_Mapes

Sorry, I see McCain more as Lando. Not intentionally evil, just sorta forced into it.

 
Joliet_Jake 2009-07-04 04:10:50 AM  
ODDwhun: Bathia_Mapes

Sorry, I see McCain more as Lando. Not intentionally evil, just sorta forced into it.


I like to think of McCain as the guy who crashed five podracers in Episode 1, and by Return of the Jedi had convinced everyone he was the one who really beat Sebulba.

 
Vangor [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:13:06 AM  
Were the first two minutes of her speech giving campaign promises without giving examples of upholding those promises? Did she, not ironically, note how her stepping down was to for the betterment of Alaska without explaining her next steps or similar? Both of those appear as though she agreed she was inefficient and politicking as per usual.

If such was her intention, I gravely underestimated the honesty of the woman. Considering the mindless chatter which has permeated anything coming out of her mouth, including within this speech, I'll have to assume otherwise, though.

 
cardex 2009-07-04 04:14:47 AM  
//I wonder if she is even still in Alaska? She could be anywhere by now with that Cessna float plane.

i would not be at all surprised if she is now in a country that does not have extrication to the US. The way she left screams the oil is about to hit the anus.

 
Vangor [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:18:30 AM  
ODDwhun: Bathia_Mapes

Sorry, I see McCain more as Lando. Not intentionally evil, just sorta forced into it.


I see McCain as the Imperial commander who Darth Vader force choked. He was not intentionally evil, but knowing full well he was committing evil for a group despite having been slapped around.

 
Dr. Mojo PhD [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:19:15 AM  
After actually reading the transcript I feel this irrepressible urge to pull a gun on my keyboard's comma key and shoot the living shiat out of it.

 
TomD9938 2009-07-04 04:20:11 AM  
Crosshair: Bathia_Mapes

That would explain how he was able to dupe millions into voting for him with nothing but empty and vauge rhetoric. The people continue to love him even when they dislike his policies.

Either that or it is a dark plot by Palpatine to keep Skywalker off balance and distracted while he builds his power base. (Or Virgin Island beach home, one of the two.) Could Palpatine be controlling Skywalker without his knowing it? Hmmmmmm.

Of course with Joe Biden as Hans Solo, it's no wonder the hyperdrive on the Millennium Falcon had such shoddy reliability.

I would say the Palin/Jar Jar comparison is accurate, though Jar jar was at least able to be somewhat helpful in an indirect and chaotic manner if you looked at his performance over the long term.


/clapping golfishly...

 
Joliet_Jake 2009-07-04 04:20:13 AM  
I like to think of John McCain like with giant eagles wings, and singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an angel band and I'm in the front row and I'm hammered drunk!

 
sgilman 2009-07-04 04:23:49 AM  
DamnYankees: Meanwhile, Obama was busy writing his 2004 Convention Speech himself, and his Philadelphia Race Speech, and etc.

But he read them from a teleprompter!

 
ODDwhun 2009-07-04 04:24:56 AM  
Vangor: ODDwhun: Bathia_Mapes

Sorry, I see McCain more as Lando. Not intentionally evil, just sorta forced into it.

I see McCain as the Imperial commander who Darth Vader force choked. He was not intentionally evil, but knowing full well he was committing evil for a group despite having been slapped around.


Nice. I like you now, geeky on so many levels.

 
Joliet_Jake 2009-07-04 04:25:21 AM  
sgilman: DamnYankees: Meanwhile, Obama was busy writing his 2004 Convention Speech himself, and his Philadelphia Race Speech, and etc.

But he read them from a teleprompter!


At least we know he's literate. I heard a lot of them negroes ain't.

 
TomD9938 2009-07-04 04:30:41 AM  
vartian

I have no problem saying President Obama is smarter then I.

I too, have no problem saying, "President Obama is smarter than you".

 
Joliet_Jake 2009-07-04 04:31:51 AM  
TomD9938: vartian

I have no problem saying President Obama is smarter then I.

I too, have no problem saying, "President Obama is smarter than you".


He just didn't finish his sentence and had poor punctuation. What he meant to say was 'I have no problem saying President Obama is smarter, then I will go make a sandwich of turkey and cheese.'

 
El Pachuco 2009-07-04 04:38:35 AM  
Well, what I heard was:

Suzanne takes you down to her place near the river
You can hear the boats go by
You can spend the night beside her
And you know that shes half crazy
But thats why you want to be there
And she feeds you tea and oranges
That come all the way from china
And just when you mean to tell her
That you have no love to give her
Then she gets you on her wavelength
And she lets the river answer
That youve always been her lover
And you want to travel with her
And you want to travel blind
And you know that she will trust you
For youve touched her perfect body with your mind.

And jesus was a sailor
When he walked upon the water
And he spent a long time watching
From his lonely wooden tower
And when he knew for certain
Only drowning men could see him
He said all men will be sailors then
Until the sea shall free them
But he himself was broken
Long before the sky would open
Forsaken, almost human
He sank beneath your wisdom like a stone
And you want to travel with him
And you want to travel blind
And you think maybe youll trust him
For hes touched your perfect body with his mind.

Now suzanne takes you hand
And she leads you to the river
She is wearing rags and feathers
From salvation army counters
And the sun pours down like honey
On our lady of the harbour
And she shows you where to look
Among the garbage and the flowers
There are heroes in the seaweed
There are children in the morning
They are leaning out for love
And they will lean that way forever
While suzanne holds the mirror
And you want to travel with her
And you want to travel blind
And you know that she will trust you
For shes touched your perfect body with her mind.


but the official transcript disagrees with me.

 
Joliet_Jake 2009-07-04 04:39:55 AM  
El Pachuco

Weird. I kept wondering what the hell Manhattan and Berlin had to do with anything. I mean, I didn't know if she was trying to lampoon the Kennedy thing or what.

 
apistat 2009-07-04 04:43:16 AM  
I can't believe some people think this is gearing up for 2012. She would be running against an incumbent and having her only real political experience be being governor of a barren state for half a term before deciding to quit unexpectedly. You can't do that and honestly expect to be taken seriously; she would get absolutely torn apart in the primaries.

And did anyone catch that "we've seen a real climate change" line in there? With any luck we won't be hearing much from her again for a long time.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 04:50:31 AM  
ZombieStomper:

(quoting Freeper) Sarah Palin just declared all-out war on the left - and believe me, she can wage that war like no other - as has been well demonstrated.

Ain't that the truth. Her positives were very high until she opened her damned mouth.

 
jrchan 2009-07-04 04:50:42 AM  
I can write a better speech than her. That should not be. I'm not even 20. What the heck.

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 04:51:34 AM  
jrchan: I can write a better speech than her. That should not be. I'm not even 20. What the heck.

Actually, I think you just did.

 
jrchan 2009-07-04 04:53:31 AM  
jrchan: I can write a better speech than her. That should not be. I'm not even 20. What the heck.

Aw fark, I meant that should not be so. Now I look retarded.

/or I might've been right the first time
//maybe I can't write a better speech than her...

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 04:54:38 AM  
jrchan: jrchan: I can write a better speech than her. That should not be. I'm not even 20. What the heck.

Aw fark, I meant that should not be so. Now I look retarded.

/or I might've been right the first time
//maybe I can't write a better speech than her...


Acceptable either way.

 
coco ebert [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:54:49 AM  
I think not only are indictments coming, but she probably needs to free up her time to go make speeches in order to make some money that she undoubtedly needs to pay for legal bills. No matter what she does, the base will love her. Fox News will probably give her her own show.

I doubt her family even knows what's going on 100%. This whole thing seems very impulsive.

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 04:55:46 AM  
coco ebert: I think not only are indictments coming, but she probably needs to free up her time to go make speeches in order to make some money that she undoubtedly needs to pay for legal bills. No matter what she does, the base will love her. Fox News will probably give her her own show.

I doubt her family even knows what's going on 100%. This whole thing seems very impulsive.


Let's hope they don't pull her book deal for this, eh?

HAHAHAHAHA!

 
jrchan 2009-07-04 04:57:20 AM  
jrchan: jrchan: I can write a better speech than her. That should not be. I'm not even 20. What the heck.

Aw fark, I meant that should not be so. Now I look retarded.

/or I might've been right the first time
//maybe I can't write a better speech than her...


Uh, and I meant can write a better speech than she can*, but I guess I can't

/proper english is for the unamerican anyway

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 04:57:57 AM  
Onward, Christian soldiers!

dtdstudios.com

 
coco ebert [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:59:31 AM  
jrchan: Uh, and I meant can write a better speech than she can*, but I guess I can't

/proper english is for the unamerican anyway


And all of this makes her even more endearing to her base. 80% of Republicans. The more she farks up, the more she becomes a political martyr.

 
jrchan 2009-07-04 04:59:52 AM  
Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any Republicans that actually take her seriously.

 
lstywnch 2009-07-04 05:00:22 AM  
Lenny_da_Hog: Let's hope they don't pull her book deal for this, eh?

HAHAHAHAHA!


Are you kidding me? They know they'll sell millions of copies. My mom will buy two and give me one. Which is cool, because free toilet paper is awesome sauce.

 
Occam's Chainsaw [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 05:02:07 AM  
jrchan: Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any Republicans that actually take her seriously.

Tons. They think that the folksy exterior is the front behind which she obscures her brilliance. Just like GWB. Ignorance is knowledge, weakness is strength, etc. They make decisions about who runs the real world based upon their own internal Bizarro World.

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 05:02:07 AM  
jrchan: Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any Republicans that actually take her seriously.

Some are still defending her in other threads. If you count Fark IndependentsTM.

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 05:04:40 AM  
lstywnch: Lenny_da_Hog: Let's hope they don't pull her book deal for this, eh?

HAHAHAHAHA!

Are you kidding me? They know they'll sell millions of copies. My mom will buy two and give me one. Which is cool, because free toilet paper is awesome sauce.


Dunno... I'd be awfully nervous this evening if I were her publisher. A fallen star won't sell many rising-star books.

 
jrchan 2009-07-04 05:06:21 AM  
jrchan: Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any Republicans that actually take her seriously.

I meant Republicans involved in the party affairs, not just the followers of the party.

/there's a word that I'm trying to think of but I can't remember

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 05:09:57 AM  
jrchan: jrchan: Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any Republicans that actually take her seriously.

I meant Republicans involved in the party affairs, not just the followers of the party.

/there's a word that I'm trying to think of but I can't remember


Absconded?

 
MorrisBird [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 05:10:32 AM  
jrchan: I meant Republicans involved in the party affairs, not just the followers of the party.

Morans?

 
lstywnch 2009-07-04 05:11:58 AM  
Lenny_da_Hog: Dunno... I'd be awfully nervous this evening if I were her publisher. A fallen star won't sell many rising-star books.

No, but this woman has an almost fanatical following. Quitting won't phase them. I think we've already seen that in the threads about it today.

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 05:13:19 AM  
lstywnch: Lenny_da_Hog: Dunno... I'd be awfully nervous this evening if I were her publisher. A fallen star won't sell many rising-star books.

No, but this woman has an almost fanatical following. Quitting won't phase them. I think we've already seen that in the threads about it today.


Kind of makes me want to give up and eat a cheesecake. And I just lost 10 pounds off my butt.

Stupid men world.

 
ODDwhun 2009-07-04 05:14:28 AM  
lstywnch: Lenny_da_Hog: Dunno... I'd be awfully nervous this evening if I were her publisher. A fallen star won't sell many rising-star books.

No, but this woman has an almost fanatical following. Quitting won't phase them. I think we've already seen that in the threads about it today.


I've actually met people who claim she was winking at them.

 
Occam's Chainsaw [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 05:15:14 AM  
jrchan: jrchan: Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any Republicans that actually take her seriously.

I meant Republicans involved in the party affairs, not just the followers of the party.

/there's a word that I'm trying to think of but I can't remember


RNC committee member?

 
lstywnch 2009-07-04 05:18:09 AM  
ODDwhun: I've actually met people who claim she was winking at them.

And I have a personal friend that thought it was awesome she talked to Palin about hair and shoes while waiting in line for coffee. She said, "And I was just so amazed that she's just so PRETTY!"

From across the room another gal in our dance class said, "I'm sorry, but STUPID IS NOT PRETTY."

 
jrchan 2009-07-04 05:19:13 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: jrchan: jrchan: Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any Republicans that actually take her seriously.

I meant Republicans involved in the party affairs, not just the followers of the party.

/there's a word that I'm trying to think of but I can't remember

RNC committee member?


Well, that certainly sounds official enough to be it.

 
Murkanen 2009-07-04 05:20:53 AM  
Crosshair: I would say the Palin/Jar Jar comparison is accurate, though Jar jar was at least able to be somewhat helpful in an indirect and chaotic manner if you looked at his performance over the long term.

He could only be considered useful if you actually wanted Palpatine to be put into a position of perpetual power and start the Republic down the not-so-long road from Democratic Republic to harsh authoritarian dictatorship. I agree that his comparison to Palin is spot on, but not for the reasons that you nor the creator of the graphic seem to realize.

/both were directly responsible for destroying the very thing they were meant to help and/or protect

 
Bonanza Jellybean 2009-07-04 05:21:50 AM  
Ed Finnerty: lstywnch: Lenny_da_Hog: Dunno... I'd be awfully nervous this evening if I were her publisher. A fallen star won't sell many rising-star books.

No, but this woman has an almost fanatical following. Quitting won't phase them. I think we've already seen that in the threads about it today.

Kind of makes me want to give up and eat a cheesecake. And I just lost 10 pounds off my butt.

Stupid men world.


Ah, how I miss that one.

 
satanicsantoku 2009-07-04 05:22:20 AM  
ha.... ha ha.
/that is all the amusement i get out of this horrible train wreck. she's worse than jon and kate plus eight plus national politics and a terrifyingly uneducated populace..
//john adams anyone?

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 05:23:50 AM  
lstywnch: ODDwhun: I've actually met people who claim she was winking at them.

And I have a personal friend that thought it was awesome she talked to Palin about hair and shoes while waiting in line for coffee. She said, "And I was just so amazed that she's just so PRETTY!"

From across the room another gal in our dance class said, "I'm sorry, but STUPID IS NOT PRETTY."


I was always amazed at the line at the base of her neck, where the make-up ends and the aged skin begins. She's gotta put that stuff on with an insulation sprayer or something.

 
shower_in_my_socks [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 05:43:16 AM  
Here's a decent breakdown of the sports complex / Palin house construction controversy, which I put together earlier today. It's a tangled web, especially for anyone not living in Alaska:

------------------------------------------------------------------


The Wasilla sports complex is a $12.5 million boondoggle. And it was Sarah's baby.

The architect at the design firm that was awarded a $500k contract to design the complex is the son of one of Sarah Palin's mentors.

Palin then named that architect to a committee that then chose a contractor owned by a guy who contributed $4,000 to Palin's campaigns -- which was a lot of money for the level of politics she was at at the time. The other bidding contractors protested the bidding process.

Additionally, one of the subcontractors was a company called Spenard Builders Supply (SBS), which is like the Home Depot of Alaska. SBS was a sponsor of Todd Palin's snowmobile team (which would have allegedly brought the Palin family 10,000's of dollars). SBS had also hired Sarah to do a commercial for them a couple of years earlier. While the sports complex was being built, in addition to being a subcontractor for the sports complex, SBS supposedly supplied the Palins with some of the materials for their new house.

Todd Palin claims he built their house with help from some "buddies," but he won't say who they were. And Sarah blocked an effort to require the filing of building permits in Wasilla, which allegedly ensured that the identity of Todd's "helpers" remained a secret. The accusation is, of course, that they were workers from the sports complex project, and that they basically built the Palin's house on the tax payers' time -- this, in addition to the Palins possibly getting free materials from SBS.

Tangentially, around the same time that the above was happening, Palin was running for Lt. Governor. About 10% of her campaign funds came from the execs (and their wives) of an oil field service company called VECO.

Now, according to a fellow Farker who is from Alaska, VECO donated money to every major GOP candidate in the state, and there is little chance that Palin is tied in with Sen. Ted Stevens scandal, which involves VECO spending $250k on upgrades to Stevens' cabin just a couple of years before the Palin's built their house. (Coincidentally, the materials for that upgrade came from SBS, as well.)

Shortly after the new Palin house was built, Sarah took over as head of Ted Stevens' PAC. So even thought there may be no connection between Palin and the Stevens/VECO scandal, there's a definite connection between the two politicians.

When you consider that Palin, who is connected to a Senator who was bribed by a company via them paying to remodel his house, is now under scrutiny regarding exactly how her own house was built, along with allegations of cronyism and favoritism in a town construction project given to companies that donated to her campaigns, it's easy to see why this is the first place people are looking in the search for an explanation of yesterday's bizarre resignation.

I maintain the view that the rising star of the GOP does not resign from office without notice, having told her own Lt. Governor less than 48-hours prior, with her head spokesperson in NYC and apparently completely unprepared, attempting to bury it on a holiday weekend, unless you are very, very afraid of something catastrophic hitting your career very, very soon.

I am waiting for the other shoe to drop.

 
crab66 2009-07-04 05:50:14 AM  
If I have learned one thing: LIFE is about choices!

Until some rightwinger wants to use the government to take your choices away.

 
Benevolent Misanthrope [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 05:53:05 AM  
Thanks for that shower_in_my_socks. Very neat and concise.

So, no real proof of any wrongdoing, but the whole thing stinks like yesterday's diapers. I think you're right - there's a reason she resigned suddenly, on a holiday weekend. And is has nothing to do with "helping all the children" by freeing herself from the demands of being Governor.

I'm just insanely curious to know what's going on.

 
rackrent [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 05:53:36 AM  
i711.photobucket.com

 
PickinWhiskers 2009-07-04 05:54:49 AM  
"People who know me know that besides faith and family, nothing's more important to me than our beloved Alaska. Serving her people is the greatest honor I could imagine."

She 'quit' Alaska.
Next up: Faith and Family.

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 05:55:36 AM  
dtdstudios.com

 
Dwight_Yeast 2009-07-04 05:57:13 AM  
ZombieStomper: but if I don't miss my bet, Sarah Palin just declared all-out war on the left - and believe me, she can wage that war like no other - as has been well demonstrated.

They've got a point: no one's ever declared war with squeeky toys before!

 
crab66 2009-07-04 05:59:57 AM  
Where is the "women are tough until things get a little bit difficult" pic.

 
shower_in_my_socks [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 06:00:34 AM  
Benevolent Misanthrope: Thanks for that shower_in_my_socks. Very neat and concise.

So, no real proof of any wrongdoing, but the whole thing stinks like yesterday's diapers. I think you're right - there's a reason she resigned suddenly, on a holiday weekend. And is has nothing to do with "helping all the children" by freeing herself from the demands of being Governor.

I'm just insanely curious to know what's going on.



Thanks. I wrote it initially as an exercise to figure out what the hell the building scandal was -- there are a lot of players and it's foggy.

The "helping the children" thing is standard guilty politician boilerplate. You don't wake up one day and think "Oh my God! I have to be with my family more! I'm throwing my career away RIGHT NOW!"

 
heap 2009-07-04 06:02:23 AM  
can't help but find it funny that the woman spoke at length, yet everyone - from punditry to allies/enemies on the political landscape to us retards - still has no mother effing clue just what the shiat she said.

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 06:04:57 AM  
i440.photobucket.com

 
dofus 2009-07-04 06:05:05 AM  
Benevolent Misanthrope: Thanks for that shower_in_my_socks. Very neat and concise.

[...]

I'm just insanely curious to know what's going on.



Seconded.

I wonder if it was one of those deals:

"Sara, we have evidence here that you did so-and-so. If you don't resign, we'll tell the news people."
"You wouldn't dare!"
"..."
"OK"

We may never know what sort of dirt someone has on her.

 
Dwight_Yeast 2009-07-04 06:05:26 AM  
One more thought: if McCain had been elected President and this (presumed) investigation had proceeded in the same manner, she would havee had to Spiro Agnew after only six months in office.

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 06:05:37 AM  
She is not a crook!

 
Occam's Chainsaw [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 06:09:25 AM  
Dwight_Yeast: One more thought: if McCain had been elected President and this (presumed) investigation had proceeded in the same manner, she would havee had to Spiro Agnew after only six months in office.

...And we'd be at war in Iran.

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 06:11:44 AM  
i152.photobucket.com

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 06:13:48 AM  
bagnewsnotes.typepad.com

 
Ed Grubermann [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 06:14:54 AM  
lstywnch: Lenny_da_Hog: Let's hope they don't pull her book deal for this, eh?

HAHAHAHAHA!

Are you kidding me? They know they'll sell millions of copies. My mom will buy two and give me one. Which is cool, because free toilet paper is awesome sauce.


I wouldn't wipe my ass with her book. That would insult the intelligence of my fecal matter.

 
Ed Grubermann [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 06:17:38 AM  
Dwight_Yeast: ZombieStomper: but if I don't miss my bet, Sarah Palin just declared all-out war on the left - and believe me, she can wage that war like no other - as has been well demonstrated.

They've got a point: no one's ever declared war with squeeky toys before!


You've never seen Honkbag: The Musical.

 
shower_in_my_socks [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 06:18:41 AM  
Ed Finnerty: She is not a crook!


img103.imageshack.us

Buh bye now.

 
rynthetyn 2009-07-04 06:19:47 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: Dwight_Yeast: One more thought: if McCain had been elected President and this (presumed) investigation had proceeded in the same manner, she would havee had to Spiro Agnew after only six months in office.

...And we'd be at war in Iran.


And quite possibly with North Korea. Especially with Kim Jong Il's little fireworks display.

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 06:20:57 AM  
shower_in_my_socks: Ed Finnerty: She is not a crook!

Buh bye now.


That is beautiful.

 
dofus 2009-07-04 06:31:33 AM  
Dwight_Yeast said:
> One more thought: if McCain had been elected [...]

Then Occam's Chainsaw said:
> ...And we'd be at war in Iran.

And rynthetyn said:
> And quite possibly with North Korea. [...]

Y'all are forgetting the fact that if McCain And Company had won, we'd all be in the soup lines by now.

One good thing though - at least Dan Quayle's star in the political walk of fame would finally be obscured.

 
Occam's Chainsaw [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 06:36:07 AM  
dofus: Y'all are forgetting the fact that if McCain And Company had won, we'd all be in the soup lines by now.

We'd all be in basic, as our 3-4 front war would require a national draft.

 
Swampthing in Korea 2009-07-04 06:58:22 AM  
Christ, the Left is more obsessed with Palin than the right ever was.

What is it about an independent, conservative and successful woman that causes the Left to go into a beserker rage and start insulting her intelligence, family and past?

I thought they were in favor of women making something of themselves, or is that only when the chick stays on the ideological plantation?

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 06:59:19 AM  
Swampthing in Korea: Christ, the Left is more obsessed with Palin than the right ever was.

What is it about an independent, conservative and successful woman that causes the Left to go into a beserker rage and start insulting her intelligence, family and past?

I thought they were in favor of women making something of themselves, or is that only when the chick stays on the ideological plantation?


Ignore them, friend. They aren't real Americans like us.

 
TwistedFark 2009-07-04 07:02:38 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: dofus: Y'all are forgetting the fact that if McCain And Company had won, we'd all be in the soup lines by now.

We'd all be in basic, as our 3-4 front war would require a national draft.


Well, you guys would all be in basic. I would be on a beach in Aruba with a couple of big titted blondes and five suit cases full of hundred dollar bills.

/Defense subcontractor.

 
mecaenas 2009-07-04 07:03:58 AM  
Oh yeah, this is the last nail in her coffin because we all know that Americans would never elect a barely literate, folksy, religious fundie, hate-spewing, hypocrite, moron as their president.

 
dervish16108 2009-07-04 07:04:10 AM  
img25.imageshack.us

 
Jon Snow [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 07:42:42 AM  
Swampthing in Korea: Christ, the Left is more obsessed with Palin than the right ever was.

img11.imageshack.us

I'm sure I'm not the only male in America who, when Palin dropped her first wink, sat up a little straighter on the couch and said, "Hey, I think she just winked at me." And her smile. By the end, when she clearly knew she was doing well, it was so sparkling it was almost mesmerizing. It sent little starbursts through the screen and ricocheting around the living rooms of America. ~ Rich Lowry

If Palin wants to run in 2012, why not do exactly what she announced today? It's an enormous gamble - but it could be a shrewd one.

After all, she's freeing herself from the duties of the governorship. Now she can do her book, give speeches, travel the country and the world, campaign for others, meet people, get more educated on the issues - and without being criticized for neglecting her duties in Alaska. I suppose she'll take a hit for leaving the governorship early - but how much of one? She's probably accomplished most of what she was going to get done as governor, and is leaving a sympatico lieutenant governor in charge.

And haven't conservatives been lamenting the lack of a national leader? Well, now she'll try to be that. She may not succeed. Everything rests on her talents, and on her performance. She'll be under intense and hostile scrutiny, and she'll have to perform well.

All in all, it's going to be a high-wire act. The odds are against her pulling it off. But I wouldn't bet against it. ~ Bill Kristol

 
Jon Snow [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 07:44:43 AM  
Bill Kristol: The odds are against her pulling it off. But I wouldn't bet against it.

I'd also like to point out that this is a classic example of why conservatives fail at probability, and therefore life.

 
Son of Thunder 2009-07-04 07:50:59 AM  
Hi Alaska, I appreciate speaking directly TO you, the people I serve, as your Governor.

Rather off-topic, but as someone who grew up in Anchorage, I'm afraid my brain has been warped to such a degree that I can't hear anyone start off their speech with "Hi, Alaska," without singing the Mafia Mike's Pizza song.

"Hi, Alaska."
"Hi, Mike!"
"I'm Mafia Mike."
"He's Mafia Mike."
"I make great pizza and I'm open all night. A family of four, can easily dine, on a extra-large pizza"
"Just eleven ninety-nine!"
"And if you're too laid, for a few bucks more, we'll deliver that pizza"
"RIGHT TO YOUR DOOR!
Mafia Mike!"

"Thanks, Alaska!"
"Mafia Mike!"

Okay, got that out of my system.

 
Dr. Mojo PhD [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 07:51:00 AM  
Swampthing in Korea: What is it about an independent, conservative and successful woman that causes the Left to go into a beserker rage and start insulting her intelligence, family and past?

In respective order, her total lack of it, her shameless use as political props & their total undermining of her and her party's stated policies and positions, and the fact that it's under investigation.

There's a reason that an independent, conservative and successful Republican woman like Michele Bachmann draws this kind of flak.

There's a reason that an independent, conservative and successful Republican woman like Olympia Snowe doesn't draw this kind of flak.

Two of them are insane, silly retards. One of them is a smart, astute woman.

For some reason, most hardcore conservatives identify more with Palin and Bachmann then Snowe, who is branded a RINO. So go figure.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 07:51:19 AM  
Jon Snow: Bill Kristol: The odds are against her pulling it off. But I wouldn't bet against it.

I'd also like to point out that this is a classic example of why conservatives fail at probability, and therefore life.


Jon -- I think you are mistaken in your estimate here. You have neglected to carry the mavrik, which randomises the batshyte distribution.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 07:53:14 AM  
Swampthing in Korea: What is it about an independent, conservative and successful woman that causes the Left to go into a beserker rage and start insulting her intelligence, family and past?

The corruption?

I think it's the corruption. Theft, if you will. I think that irritates people.

 
Dr. Mojo PhD [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 07:54:51 AM  
PartTimeBuddha: I think it's the corruption. Theft, if you will. I think that irritates people.

The silly retardation hurts too. I empathize with thieves more than silly retards.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 07:57:22 AM  
Dr. Mojo PhD: PartTimeBuddha: I think it's the corruption. Theft, if you will. I think that irritates people.

The silly retardation hurts too. I empathize with thieves more than silly retards.


I guess there's also her habit of rolling over on her supporters as soon as they've served her purpose. There's a kind of treason in that which I'd personally find hard to stomach.

 
2wolves 2009-07-04 07:58:58 AM  
Hubris. Her ego kept writing checks her intellect couldn't cover.

 
Dr. Mojo PhD [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 08:02:09 AM  
PartTimeBuddha: I guess there's also her habit of rolling over on her supporters as soon as they've served her purpose. There's a kind of treason in that which I'd personally find hard to stomach.

And the formerly-registered-secessionist First "Dude". And her friendly speech to his pals.

Cause nothing promotes a strong Union like a State just walking away.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 08:02:42 AM  
2wolves: Hubris. Her ego kept writing checks her intellect couldn't cover.

Being wise can compensate for being dumb. Unfortunately she's only been gifted with a kind of short-sighted unwisdom. She's very energetic with it, however.

 
Podna 2009-07-04 08:03:18 AM  
DamnYankees: baka-san: ...She makes my governor look semi sane.

Sorry, I don't think anyone can do that.


was about to say, Oh I bet my gov is more insane then I checked baka's profile.. God damnit so much

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 08:04:35 AM  
Dr. Mojo PhD: PartTimeBuddha: I guess there's also her habit of rolling over on her supporters as soon as they've served her purpose. There's a kind of treason in that which I'd personally find hard to stomach.

And the formerly-registered-secessionist First "Dude". And her friendly speech to his pals.

Cause nothing promotes a strong Union like a State just walking away.


Hm. I don't know. I've never really rated that as a problem. I think it appeals to a lot of people -- at least the principle of independence. Crocky and a bit dim, but there is an emotional appeal there against teh big gubit.

 
Dr. Mojo PhD [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 08:06:02 AM  
PartTimeBuddha: Being wise can compensate for being dumb. Unfortunately she's only been gifted with a kind of short-sighted unwisdom. She's very energetic with it, however.

Hence "silly retard". She's profoundly stupid, and utterly ignorant. Which is a farking recipe for disaster. Ignorant and smart people can be put to work, wise and dumb people can be put to work, wise and smart people can conquer the nations of the world, but the ignorant and stupid are just a whole other kettle of fish.

Which is why we elect them in droves, I think. It's either a sweep-them-away-until-they-butcher-something strategy, or an elaborate comedy routine. Occasionally, such as when we give them access to fissile materials and the ability to project said materials about the globe, it is terrifying.

 
Dr. Mojo PhD [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 08:10:29 AM  
PartTimeBuddha: Hm. I don't know. I've never really rated that as a problem. I think it appeals to a lot of people -- at least the principle of independence. Crocky and a bit dim, but there is an emotional appeal there against teh big gubit.

Often, that's all. Hey, I wouldn't object to Alaska joining Canada -- it bothers me that our coastline is so raggedy and uneven, and I really wanna stick it to Russia with that whole largest country thing -- or something like that. But that's all it is, is some hokey feel-good stuff about rugged individualism. I suppose in fairness the AIP just wants a vote on statehood, at least at present, by referendum, which isn't as bad as the Confederacy, for example.

On the other hand, I think when you're some big RAH! RAH! AMERICA! farker, and you're married to somebody who wants to chant RAH! RAH! ALASKA!, it's sort of questionable.

 
2wolves 2009-07-04 08:13:14 AM  
Dr. Mojo PhD:

Hence "silly retard". She's profoundly stupid, and utterly ignorant. Which is a farking recipe for disaster. Ignorant and smart people can be put to work, wise and dumb people can be put to work, wise and smart people can conquer the nations of the world, but the ignorant and stupid are just a whole other kettle of fish.

Which is why we elect them in droves, I think. It's either a sweep-them-away-until-they-butcher-something strategy, or an elaborate comedy routine. Occasionally, such as when we give them access to fissile materials and the ability to project said materials about the globe, it is terrifying.



The naked ambition aspect, tied into the ego, can not be given too much credit here: Ms. Palin devised her ascendancy onto the nation/international stage very deliberately. She believed herself to be capable of greatness. I don't believe history will be kind.

 
Homer_J_Fong 2009-07-04 08:13:28 AM  
After reading the first few lines of the transcript...I couldn't help but think...


Hi Alaska, Mesa appreciate speakin' directly TO yousa, der people Mesa serve, as yousar Governor. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! People who know mesa know that besides faith and family, nothin's more important to mesa than wesa beloved Alaska. Oh. Flbulbulbu. Servin' her people is der greatest honor Mesa could imagine. Way? Esqueeze mesa. Mesa want Alaskans to grasp wha can be in store for wesa state....

 
UNC_Samurai [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 08:15:06 AM  
furiousxgeorge: I want Alaskans to grasp what can be in store for our state. We were purchased as a territory because a member of President Abe Lincoln's cabinet, William Seward, providentially saw in this great land, vast riches, beauty, strategic placement on the globe, and opportunity. He boldly looked "North to the Future". But he endured such ridicule and mocking for his vision for Alaska, remember the adversaries scoffed, calling this "Seward's Folly". Seward withstood such disdain as he chose the uncomfortable, unconventional, but RIGHT path to secure Alaska, so Alaska could help secure the United States.

Wow, she doesn't know her history. When Tsar Alexander II realized he might lose Russian America (Alaska) to Britain if they got entangled in another war, he decided to sell the land dirt cheap and get some compensation for it rather than lose it as part of a costly peace treaty.

And "Abe Lincoln's cabinet"? "Seward's Folly" isn't its only name - it was also called "Andrew Johnson's polar bear garden", because Lincoln was too dead to continue serving as president. And it wasn't a completely silly purchase at the time. A lot of American newspapers supported the purchase because it flanked British Canada. Granted, it was supposed that eventually Britain would give up and sell Canada to the U.S., but that's 19th century journalism for you.

/TL;DR, Palin is still woefully ignorant of history.

 
heap 2009-07-04 08:23:04 AM  
Jon Snow: If Palin wants to run in 2012 - Bill Kristol

well, then it's official.

sarah palin is done in politics.

by virtue of the if-bill-kristol-says-it-then-the-exact-opposite-happens property, we can now tell the future absent any other input.

 
Jon Snow [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 08:28:59 AM  
heap: by virtue of the if-bill-kristol-says-it-then-the-exact-opposite-happens property, we can now tell the future absent any other input.

As always, TDS has it covered.

 
I_Approve_Of_This_Message 2009-07-04 08:39:36 AM  
rantsoftheuninformed.files.wordpress.com

Governor Palin, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent speech were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

 
The Fourth Karamazov [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 08:53:18 AM  
jrchan: Anyways, I'm wondering if there are any Republicans that actually take her seriously.

Yes there are. People who I normally consider very intelligent continue to try to tell me that she is really very smart and it's the liberal media that is tearing her down.

 
The_Patriot 2009-07-04 09:02:19 AM  
clifton: Still don't understand the worship of this woman...

How the average Joe Sixpack sees Sarah Palin:

thepatriotaxe.com

 
h2ogate [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 09:09:06 AM  
www.electrongate.com

 
The_Patriot 2009-07-04 09:12:13 AM  
oh, and according to my gramma

thepatriotaxe.com

 
Great_Milenko 2009-07-04 09:26:50 AM  
Gangway Fathead: And so a new political party is born.

Yep. The Teabag Party, also known as Birthers.

And she is their queen.

 
chipspastic 2009-07-04 09:31:20 AM  
furiousxgeorge: People who know me know that besides faith and family, nothing's more important to me than our beloved Alaska.

Hmmm. Doesn't sound much like "Country First" to me. More like 4th at least.

 
Lost Thought 00 2009-07-04 09:33:59 AM  
Great_Milenko: Gangway Fathead: And so a new political party is born.

Yep. The Teabag Party, also known as Birthers.

And she is their queen.


and Ron Paul is their Emperor.

 
Magorn 2009-07-04 09:42:53 AM  
Occam's Chainsaw: furiousxgeorge: In the words of General MacArthur said, "We are not retreating. We are advancing in another direction."

What are they marching toward, Hell? Obscurity? Ruin?


Good choice quoting MacArthur- A failed presidential candidate, considered by many of his peers (including his former protege who DID become President) to be a Self-absorbed blowhard.

 
Bendal 2009-07-04 09:43:31 AM  
Quitter Palin will have that hung around her neck for the rest of her (presumably short) political career. I don't see the GOP giving her a 2nd look now; they are plenty bright enough to know that she'd be torn apart over this "quitting" issue even without all the other issues she carries with her.

/actually hoping they aren't that bright

 
czetie 2009-07-04 09:45:55 AM  
Lost Thought 00: and Ron Paul is their Emperor.

So who would be his Darth Vader?

/I hear Karl Rove is available, and he has experience

 
Magorn 2009-07-04 09:46:12 AM  
GAT_00: CtrlAltDelete: fish jacket

...right.

You know, it does kinda read like Nixon's "Last Speech," though heavily adapted.


heavily adapted or medicated? I tried to transcribe the video last night and gave up in sheer frustration. The punctuation alone was impossible to determine. She really did sound as if she'd just recently partken of a care package from Levi Johnson's mom (the Meth dealer)

 
blueyedevil 2009-07-04 09:49:54 AM  
"Don't explain: your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe you anyway."

So we can assume she's going to plead the fifth in her upcoming trial?

 
eraser8 2009-07-04 10:02:10 AM  
Curiouser and curiouser.

 
Magorn 2009-07-04 10:06:46 AM  
Sgt Otter: ZombieStomper: Freepers are hitting an astounding level of crazy tonight:

Sarah Palin just made a covert Declaration Of War
n/a | 7/3/09 | Ron C
Posted on July 3, 2009 11:02:00 PM CDT by Ron C.

Ever notice? When she's angry, she starts talking a little faster, her eyes lids narrow a tad, and she talks through lips that are a bit closer together - and that faint frown of hers becomes almost permanent, yet a smile remains. She displayed all of those signs today. She didn't say it in so many words, but if I don't miss my bet, Sarah Palin just declared all-out war on the left - and believe me, she can wage that war like no other - as has been well demonstrated.

Her Waterloo was a soft-focus fluff piece with Katie Couric, who wasn't even trying to rattle her.


Alexandra Pelosi (yes Nancy's kid) has a wonderful documentary called "Right America: Feeling Wronged" where she followed McCain and Palin to campaign rallies during the waning days of the campaign, and interviewed the people that came to them.

The Palin devotees were the scariest people I've ever seen on film. I recall one middle-aged woman literally sputtering with outrage over Katie Couric's "Gotcha" questions. "What Magazines and newspapers do YOU read Katie!?" she almost hissed with outrage, apparently thinking that question would be hard for a normal human being to answer.

 
Nucleus 2009-07-04 10:13:04 AM  
Yes but, Where's her birth certificate?

Although its clear what this says about John Mcshames decision making skills, we should all remember Sarah Palin this July 4th weekend as a true patriot for doing the responsible thing and resigning after the self realization that she was under-qualified and lacked the intellectual refinement necessary for serious national politics.

Best of luck to the former governor.

 
technicolor-misfit 2009-07-04 10:15:04 AM  
Well, bless her heart... maybe, like Track, she too can cut a deal to avoid jail time by joining the military and serve alongside him to fight for our freedom to protest.

 
alywa [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 10:17:49 AM  
i35.photobucket.com

/

 
bwesb 2009-07-04 10:20:38 AM  
"We are not retreating. We are advancing in another direction."

There's another word for that, Mrs. Palin.

Fail.

 
moralpanic 2009-07-04 10:23:29 AM  
Man, and to think this woman could have been one step away from being President.

 
Jackpot777 [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-04 10:23:33 AM  
Jon Snow: Bill Kristol: The odds are against her pulling it off. But I wouldn't bet against it.

I'd also like to point out that this is a classic example of why conservatives fail at probability, and therefore life.


You ain't just whistling Dixie there, brother...

i301.photobucket.com

 
Philip J. Fry [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 10:35:11 AM  
When she said all 15 of the ethics complaints were dismissed, did that include the trooper related stuff? If I recall she was found to have abused her official powers and some other scathing stuff.

 
Nucleus 2009-07-04 10:36:05 AM  
Check the panicked sharp intake of breaths during the entire rambling speech.

 
Magorn 2009-07-04 10:38:21 AM  
Philip J. Fry: When she said all 15 of the ethics complaints were dismissed, did that include the trooper related stuff? If I recall she was found to have abused her official powers and some other scathing stuff.

Alaska Daily News helpfully recaps all 18 ethic complaints against her and their current status here (new window)

 
SherKhan 2009-07-04 10:38:25 AM  
Magorn:

The punctuation alone was impossible to determine.

It needs phonetic punctuation *poipt*

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 10:42:30 AM  
Philip J. Fry: When she said all 15 of the ethics complaints were dismissed, did that include the trooper related stuff? If I recall she was found to have abused her official powers and some other scathing stuff.

The legislative committee found her in violation.

Her hand-picked personnel board took over the investigation and said, "Huh? What? I... don't see anything wrong here! Whuddya mean?"

 
Philip J. Fry [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 10:44:08 AM  
Lenny_da_Hog: Her hand-picked personnel board took over the investigation and said, "Huh? What? I... don't see anything wrong here! Whuddya mean?"

I just read Magorn's link and was relatively content with the complaints being dismissed by the personnel board (Two still pending), but she's the one who chose the board?

Well that just invalidates every opinion they've had.

 
rufus-t-firefly [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 11:11:14 AM  
Saw this analysis on Salon.com; the bolded portion is spot-on:

First came news that Alaska governor Sarah Palin wouldn't run for re-election, confirmed by CNN around 3 pm ET. Minutes later, Alaska television station KTUU reported that Palin had actually announced she will resign her office at the end of the month.

In an angry, rambling press conference that will rival Gov. Mark Sanford's as a stunning example of a bizarre public meltdown, Palin basically blamed her decision on her national critics, who she said were blocking her agenda and costing Alaska taxpayers money.

"You are naïve if you don't see a full court press right now on the national level picking apart a good point guard," Palin said, a reference to her days as Sarah Barracuda, high school basketball star. What does a good point guard do? "She drives through a full court press protecting the ball, keeping her head up...and passing the ball so her team can win. I know when it's time to pass the ball for a win.

"I really don't want to disappoint anyone with this decision," Palin continued. "I cannot stand here as your governor and allow millions of dollars to go to waste. I don't know if my children are going to allow it either...This decision comes after a lot of prayer and deliberation." Palin said all of her children endorsed her decision, and she closed by complaining about people mocking her Down's Syndrome son Trig, with little Piper standing by her side.

"In the words of General MacArthur, we are not retreating, we are advancing in another direction," Palin said, as she turned the podium over to the apparently shocked Lt. Gov. Sean Parnell.

There was rolling hilarity and a total news vacuum on television for about 10 minutes after the news first broke. CNN's Rick Sanchez wondered aloud if Palin could be pregnant again - shocking Candy Crowley - before interviewing Frontiersman reporter Andrew Wellner, who says the press conference came as a total surprise to local reporters.

"She didn't take any questions, she said she could be more effective outside of government," Wellner said, reading his notes to Sanchez. Then CNN got tape of Palin's announcement.

This is very weird. We'll update when we get more information.

Update: Getting weirder. CNN is now running the entire speech; earlier, it only ran a clip from her resignation statement onward. It's crazy stuff. For the first 10 minutes or so, Palin rambled weirdly about all the good things she's done for Alaska, on energy and budget issues, sounding kind of like a Furby who memorized a lot of information but has no idea how to repeat it in a human-like way. The tone and inflection were completely off.


I've never known how to describe her...but that Furby bit is perfect.

In summary: "I did so much awesome stuff for my beloved state...but people are picking on me so I gotta go."

And misattributing that "advancing in another direction" quote - not MacArthur in WWII but Maj. Gen. Oliver Smith in Korea - is just the icing on a cake of WHAARGARBL.

 
Salt Lick Steady 2009-07-04 11:17:19 AM  
Ed Finnerty: Onward, Christian soldiers!

You know, it's mighty funny that that site quotes 1 Timothy 2, which goes on to say, "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;...

"But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence."

 
Gough 2009-07-04 11:18:13 AM  
I couldn't help but notice the three huge ads for SarahPAC when I opened Fark. Doesn't look to me like she's giving up on politics. Maybe she's trying to raise the money for her upcoming legal bills.

 
rufus-t-firefly [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 11:18:14 AM  
Gangway Fathead: And so a new political party is born.

Too bad it's retarded.

 
Tor_Eckman [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 11:18:48 AM  
Homer_J_Fong: After reading the first few lines of the transcript...I couldn't help but think...


Hi Alaska, Mesa appreciate speakin' directly TO yousa, der people Mesa serve, as yousar Governor. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! People who know mesa know that besides faith and family, nothin's more important to mesa than wesa beloved Alaska. Oh. Flbulbulbu. Servin' her people is der greatest honor Mesa could imagine. Way? Esqueeze mesa. Mesa want Alaskans to grasp wha can be in store for wesa state....


ROFL!

 
Tor_Eckman [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 11:22:12 AM  
rufus-t-firefly:

And the lulz keep on coming!

Thank you for sharing that. It's classic.

 
Hiro Nakamura [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 11:22:41 AM  
Ed Finnerty: Onward, Christian soldiers!

Does muttering "Jesus Christ" in disbelief that a site like that exists count as praying? If so I guess I should add my name to the list.

 
YakBoy42 2009-07-04 11:26:09 AM  
Since we're dusting these off again...

i104.photobucket.com

(Thrall, Cairne Bloodhoof, Lady Katrana Prestor/Onyxia, and Araj the Summoner)

 
7Mary3and4 2009-07-04 11:29:23 AM  
"People who know me know that besides faith and family, nothing's more important to me than our beloved Alaska. Serving her people is the greatest honor I could imagine."

..says the woman who tried to dump out of the job to "serve" as VP.

 
chipspastic 2009-07-04 11:29:48 AM  
i279.photobucket.com

 
Gangway Fathead 2009-07-04 11:34:31 AM  
rufus-t-firefly: Gangway Fathead: And so a new political party is born.

Too bad it's retarded.


Hey, I didn't suggest it was a good one.

 
The Only Good Moran 2009-07-04 11:37:18 AM  
So how is Queen Palin a victim this time? Please tell me, o loyal subjects who worship her.

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 11:49:35 AM  
Swampthing in Korea: What is it about an independent, conservative and successful woman that causes the Left to go into a beserker rage and start insulting her intelligence, family and past?

When the GOP decides to field one for President, I'll let you know.

 
SomeoneDumb 2009-07-04 12:12:44 PM  
I'm not the first to say it, but this whole speech sounded to me like her version of a fancy way to say "cut and run."

 
Skleenar 2009-07-04 12:24:32 PM  
In honor of Sarah.

No.

I have no idea why this popped into my mind.

I think maybe just because it is redneck and farked up.

 
Crown_of_Shoes 2009-07-04 12:39:12 PM  
Brand new one for ya'll:

img39.imageshack.us

Get it? She's THE DOPE.

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:41:07 PM  
Where oh where, are you tonight?
Why did you leave us here all alone?
We searched the world over and thought we'd found true love,
But you got indicted and thwbbb! you were gone!

So long you beautiful starburst you.

 
Benevolent Misanthrope [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 12:44:20 PM  
Hiro Nakamura: Ed Finnerty: Onward, Christian soldiers!

Does muttering "Jesus Christ" in disbelief that a site like that exists count as praying? If so I guess I should add my name to the list.


i261.photobucket.com">

 
phaseolus 2009-07-04 12:47:11 PM  
"Now, despite this, I don't want any Alaskan dissuaded from entering politics after seeing this REAL "climate change" that began in August... no, we NEED hardworking, average Americans fighting for what's right!"

sigh.

It's the old "salt of the earth >>> educated people" fallacy...

 
SCUBA_Archer 2009-07-04 12:51:15 PM  
chipspastic :
(Candidates compared to paintings)

I know these are old and dusty from several months ago, but....
Wouldn't it be more apropos to compare Palin to a Thomas Kinkade work?

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 12:54:31 PM  
phaseolus: "Now, despite this, I don't want any Alaskan dissuaded from entering politics after seeing this REAL "climate change" that began in August... no, we NEED hardworking, average Americans fighting for what's right!"

sigh.

It's the old "salt of the earth >>> educated people" fallacy...


Yeah.

And we need more short people on the basketball court. We need more 150-lb. linebackers in football. We need more tone-deaf people in orchestras....

 
Nucleus 2009-07-04 12:55:25 PM  
Geez guys come on that was a quality troll. Can I at least get a grade?

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:01:40 PM  
img152.imageshack.us

 
DFWPhotoGuy 2009-07-04 01:05:58 PM  
shower_in_my_socks: Here's a decent breakdown of the sports complex / Palin house construction controversy, which I put together earlier today. It's a tangled web, especially for anyone not living in Alaska:


You are now the Tats of Palin threads. We need a new color for this cause!

/but seriously he was awesome
//and you are to, ty for the summary

 
BergZ 2009-07-04 01:09:17 PM  
Sarah Palin: "... William Seward, providentially saw in this great land, vast riches, beauty, strategic placement on the globe, and opportunity. He boldly looked "North to the Future". But he endured such ridicule and mocking for his vision for Alaska, remember the adversaries scoffed, calling this "Seward's Folly". Seward withstood such disdain as he chose the uncomfortable, unconventional, but RIGHT path to secure Alaska, so Alaska could help secure the United States."

I'm consistently amazed at how Republicans can believe they are the "silent majority" of a "fundamentally conservative country"... and at the same time believe their shrill, self-righteous values are so unpopular that they are under constant attack from all sides.

 
blueyedevil 2009-07-04 01:12:48 PM  
Lenny_da_Hog: phaseolus: "Now, despite this, I don't want any Alaskan dissuaded from entering politics after seeing this REAL "climate change" that began in August... no, we NEED hardworking, average Americans fighting for what's right!"

sigh.

It's the old "salt of the earth >>> educated people" fallacy...

Yeah.

And we need more short people on the basketball court. We need more 150-lb. linebackers in football. We need more tone-deaf people in orchestras....


Your examples aren't even as ridiculous as what she actually said.

"The world needs more retards"

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 01:24:13 PM  
Nucleus: Geez guys come on that was a quality troll. Can I at least get a grade?

I saw it and I liked it.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 01:25:08 PM  
Should her next child be called "Quit"?

It's quite a nice sounding name.

 
Space_Poet 2009-07-04 01:31:59 PM  
shower_in_my_socks: Here's a decent breakdown of the sports complex / Palin house construction controversy, which I put together earlier today. It's a tangled web, especially for anyone not living in Alaska:

You should submit that to Wiki.

 
Space_Poet 2009-07-04 01:34:24 PM  
Benevolent Misanthrope: Thanks for that shower_in_my_socks. Very neat and concise.

So, no real proof of any wrongdoing, but the whole thing stinks like yesterday's diapers. I think you're right - there's a reason she resigned suddenly, on a holiday weekend. And is has nothing to do with "helping all the children" by freeing herself from the demands of being Governor.

I'm just insanely curious to know what's going on.


No one just gives up all the power that they have for nothing. She's as crooked as a, well, a crooked thing.

 
superlawyergirl [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:37:16 PM  
cardex: //I wonder if she is even still in Alaska? She could be anywhere by now with that Cessna float plane.

i would not be at all surprised if she is now in a country that does not have extrication to the US. The way she left screams the oil is about to hit the anus.


Believe me, I await the coming of your prophesy like a child five minutes before the start of the Saturday morning cartoons: giant bowl of cereal and all, but this may just be Palin being Palin.

She's been continously criticized for never being in Alaska to govern anyway, as her sights were permanently set on the White House as soon as McCain said her name back in 2008. She's not seeking re-election (most assume for her to pursue a bid for a national office), but rather than continue to be held down by her current position she's skipping lame duck status and getting the hell out of Dodge.

 
brigid_fitch [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 01:40:55 PM  
Magorn: The Palin devotees were the scariest people I've ever seen on film. I recall one middle-aged woman literally sputtering with outrage over Katie Couric's "Gotcha" questions. "What Magazines and newspapers do YOU read Katie!?" she almost hissed with outrage, apparently thinking that question would be hard for a normal human being to answer.

I've said this many times before. The right-wing nutjobs a LOT of people, not just Alexandra, filmed & posted about were just downright scary. Throughout the entire campaign, there were only 2 instances of any scary left-wing nutjobs: The woman w/the backwards B (which turned out to be BS) and the two Black Panther-like guys hanging out in front of a Philly voting station (they were there for about an hour and when asked to leave by election officials, they did.)

The left has its share of crazies, but very few are of the level of violence and danger exhibited by so many on the right.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-04 01:45:28 PM  
superlawyergirl: She's been continously criticized for never being in Alaska to govern anyway, as her sights were permanently set on the White House as soon as McCain said her name back in 2008. She's not seeking re-election (most assume for her to pursue a bid for a national office), but rather than continue to be held down by her current position she's skipping lame duck status and getting the hell out of Dodge.

It seems unlikely to me, given the rushed, piss-poor nature of her resignation speech. I'm not sure I've ever seen her less competent than yesterday. If this was part of a Grand Plan, surely it would have appeared as more... well, more of a plan, with less whining about how much the legal expenses are.

Reeks of panic.

Yet, at the same time, it's odd that if there is a scandal, she doesn't fight it. From whence comes this newfangled wisdom such that she is able to identify an oncoming train?

 
oldweevil 2009-07-04 01:49:51 PM  
i117.photobucket.com

i117.photobucket.com

i117.photobucket.com

 
Ed Finnerty 2009-07-04 01:53:38 PM  
Everyone please take note of those defending her. I'm curious to see how quiet they'll get when the shiat hits the fan.

 
MythRender 2009-07-04 01:54:01 PM  
carnifex2005: And here her speech translated into Jive......

What it is, big mama? My mama no raise no dummies. I dug her rap!

 
Benevolent Misanthrope [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 02:20:57 PM  
Space_Poet: No one just gives up all the power that they have for nothing. She's as crooked as a, well, a crooked thing.

As my dear old Gran used to say, "Crookeder'n a dog's hind leg."

/Southernisms FTW

 
Sgt Otter [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 02:28:58 PM  
brigid_fitch: Magorn: The Palin devotees were the scariest people I've ever seen on film. I recall one middle-aged woman literally sputtering with outrage over Katie Couric's "Gotcha" questions. "What Magazines and newspapers do YOU read Katie!?" she almost hissed with outrage, apparently thinking that question would be hard for a normal human being to answer.

I've said this many times before. The right-wing nutjobs a LOT of people, not just Alexandra, filmed & posted about were just downright scary. Throughout the entire campaign, there were only 2 instances of any scary left-wing nutjobs: The woman w/the backwards B (which turned out to be BS) and the two Black Panther-like guys hanging out in front of a Philly voting station (they were there for about an hour and when asked to leave by election officials, they did.)

The left has its share of crazies, but very few are of the level of violence and danger exhibited by so many on the right.


Uh, the woman with the backwards B was a crazy right-winger. It was a staged attack to make Obama supporters seem like big, scary black racists who will attack poor, little Conservative white girls.

She was a campaign worker for Ron Paul and McCain, and claimed she was targeted because of the McCain sticker on her car.

 
LincolnLogolas 2009-07-04 02:35:14 PM  
It's such a disappointment that Sarah Palin resigned, an even bigger disappointment if she's planning on dropping out of the public eye. She provided a virtually limitless source of great material for comedians, Farkers, non-Righty talk show hosts, and just about anyone else with a sense of humor.

Pity.

 
BasqueBastard 2009-07-04 02:37:47 PM  
MythRender: carnifex2005: And here her speech translated into Jive......

What it is, big mama? My mama no raise no dummies. I dug her rap!


i186.photobucket.com

 
SubBass49 2009-07-04 03:18:39 PM  
img26.imageshack.us

 
pnjunction [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:32:25 PM  
coco ebert: And all of this makes her even more endearing to her base. 80% of Republicans. The more she farks up, the more she becomes a political martyr.

This is what I've been thinking the whole time.

To the crazies, it isn't going to be "Remember that Sarah Palin? What a mistake, she was a trainwreck!".

It's going to be "Poor Sarah Palin! Such an intelligent woman with so much potential but the far left just kept hacking at her until they chopped her down." Their delusion knows no bounds.

 
bronyaur1 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:34:33 PM  
ZombieStomper: Freepers are hitting an astounding level of crazy tonight:

Sarah Palin just made a covert Declaration Of War
n/a | 7/3/09 | Ron C
Posted on July 3, 2009 11:02:00 PM CDT by Ron C.

Ever notice? When she's angry, she starts talking a little faster, her eyes lids narrow a tad, and she talks through lips that are a bit closer together - and that faint frown of hers becomes almost permanent, yet a smile remains. She displayed all of those signs today. She didn't say it in so many words, but if I don't miss my bet, Sarah Palin just declared all-out war on the left - and believe me, she can wage that war like no other - as has been well demonstrated.


By completely occupying all the Stupid sectors of the battlefield?

 
WhyteRaven74 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:49:36 PM  
Ed Finnerty: i152.photobucket.com

she didn't even crack 1000 on the SAT? *blink blink*

 
Highroller48 [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:52:27 PM  
According to Sarah Palin's speech, we're to believe that Abraham Lincoln and his advisors knew Alaska would be the "Air Crossroads of the world", and the front line against the Soviet Union. They also knew about the oil and gas. (Among a thousand other rambling points.)

Talk about a speech to nowhere.

 
SurfaceTension [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 03:55:47 PM  
i59.photobucket.com

 
BergZ 2009-07-04 04:02:55 PM  
Dr. Mojo PhD 2009-07-04 07:51:00 AM
Swampthing in Korea: What is it about an independent, conservative and successful woman that causes the Left to go into a beserker rage and start insulting her intelligence, family and past?

"In respective order, her total lack of it, her shameless use as political props & their total undermining of her and her party's stated policies and positions, and the fact that it's under investigation.
There's a reason that an independent, conservative and successful Republican woman like Michele Bachmann draws this kind of flak.
There's a reason that an independent, conservative and successful Republican woman like Olympia Snowe doesn't draw this kind of flak.
Two of them are insane, silly retards. One of them is a smart, astute woman.
For some reason, most hardcore conservatives identify more with Palin and Bachmann then Snowe, who is branded a RINO. So go figure."


So much THIS!
Olympia Snowe barely gets mentioned here on FARK because she does her job quietly and competently. She is, in many ways, the model for how everyone should do their job.

 
Russad 2009-07-04 04:09:31 PM  
So, uh...anyone else notice that her accent disappeared in that speech?

 
Sgt Otter [TotalFark] 2009-07-04 04:13:37 PM  
Surface Tension:

Awesome, but I'd love it if you used the "Joe Biden washing his Trans Am in Daisy Dukes" photo from The Onion.

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-04 04:20:57 PM  
Russad: So, uh...anyone else notice that her accent disappeared in that speech?

She was talking to Alaskans. That's how she always sounds. The accent was a construction of McCainCorp.

 
rippinthegears 2009-07-04 04:48:29 PM  
carnifex2005: And here her speech translated into Jive...

More UK thug than jive.

slash tl:dr

 
ScottHimself 2009-07-04 05:21:10 PM  
I left my father (a rabid GOP supporter - still claims Obama is from Africa and is Muslim) a voicemail when I heard she was resigning.

"Hey Pops it's Scott. Just calling to let you know Sarah Palin just announced that she's resigning from her office in Alaska. I know you're thinking I'm calling to let you know that I was right about her being an absolute disaster, and for the first time as far as Palin's concerned you're right. See you on the 4th."

Headed over there after I leave. He hasn't returned the call.

 
Bendal 2009-07-04 05:48:44 PM  
Can you imagine how much of a clusterfark she would have been had McCain somehow been elected President? I can envision her standing up there and saying "forget all this, you people don't deserve me, I quit" and just flying back home while an openmouthed McCain just stares at her.

 
Gardenia 2009-07-04 06:19:39 PM  
baka-san: The only 2 things I likes about her were that...

...She makes my governor look semi sane.

She killed any chance of McCain winning.

I'm betting she is being forced out.

CtrlAltDelete: baka-san: She killed any chance of McCain winning.

I like Obama, I voted for Obama, but McCain would have been a decent president, I think. I feel bad for the poor bastard. I didn't realize it at the time, but he didn't have a chance in hell after choosing Palin.


Absolutely THIS

 
Gardenia 2009-07-04 06:30:15 PM  
Dr. Mojo PhD: After actually reading the transcript I feel this irrepressible urge to pull a gun on my keyboard's comma key and shoot the living shiat out of it.

You win.

 
Herunar 2009-07-04 06:53:24 PM  
wejash: Because being out of any office and simply a talking head worked so well for Mitt Rommney, Rudy Guiliani and John Edwards, among others.

Romney, Giuliani and Edwards had moderate success. In fact, Giuliani would probably have won the primary elections if he didn't fark up his campaign. The difference is that these candidates actually had quite a record, so even if they weren't in office, experience wasn't a question. Palin, on the other hand, is resigning before her first term even finished. I simply see no way she could win the presidential race like this.

 
moralpanic 2009-07-04 07:24:56 PM  
ScottHimself: I left my father (a rabid GOP supporter - still claims Obama is from Africa and is Muslim) a voicemail when I heard she was resigning.

"Hey Pops it's Scott. Just calling to let you know Sarah Palin just announced that she's resigning from her office in Alaska. I know you're thinking I'm calling to let you know that I was right about her being an absolute disaster, and for the first time as far as Palin's concerned you're right. See you on the 4th."

Headed over there after I leave. He hasn't returned the call.


LOL you're an evil little son LOL!

 
Boo Radley 2009-07-04 07:31:35 PM  
Wordie of Palin's speech:

i39.tinypic.com

 
BlackKaiser 2009-07-04 07:59:29 PM  
Time to break this one out again:
img125.imageshack.us

 
xria 2009-07-04 09:24:53 PM  
Sgt Otter: brigid_fitch: Magorn: The Palin devotees were the scariest people I've ever seen on film. I recall one middle-aged woman literally sputtering with outrage over Katie Couric's "Gotcha" questions. "What Magazines and newspapers do YOU read Katie!?" she almost hissed with outrage, apparently thinking that question would be hard for a normal human being to answer.

I've said this many times before. The right-wing nutjobs a LOT of people, not just Alexandra, filmed & posted about were just downright scary. Throughout the entire campaign, there were only 2 instances of any scary left-wing nutjobs: The woman w/the backwards B (which turned out to be BS) and the two Black Panther-like guys hanging out in front of a Philly voting station (they were there for about an hour and when asked to leave by election officials, they did.)

The left has its share of crazies, but very few are of the level of violence and danger exhibited by so many on the right.

Uh, the woman with the backwards B was a crazy right-winger. It was a staged attack to make Obama supporters seem like big, scary black racists who will attack poor, little Conservative white girls.

She was a campaign worker for Ron Paul and McCain, and claimed she was targeted because of the McCain sticker on her car.


So what you are saying is that incident was one "which turned out to be BS"?

 
earth 2009-07-04 10:56:04 PM  
She is just as big an idiot as I have been trying to everyone I know. It seems the only people who are upset about her leaving are those Wymen who would vote for any female, regardless of their qualifications (or in Palin's case lack of).
Palin is , has been, and will always be a very bad joke.
She is obviously an idiot.
//Good Riddance.

 
AlrightGuy 2009-07-04 11:52:19 PM  
rufus-t-firefly: And misattributing that "advancing in another direction" quote - not MacArthur in WWII but Maj. Gen. Oliver Smith in Korea - is just the icing on a cake of WHAARGARBL.

Came here to say this. Glad to see someone else already caught it.

But the Right loves that ol' nutty MacArthur for wanting to nuke the Chinese in '51. As for Palin's ignorant misquoting, it's all about scoring points with people who know just enough history to make themselves dangerous.

 
cloud_van_dame [TotalFark] 2009-07-05 12:29:12 AM  
Swampthing in Korea: What is it about an independent, conservative and successful woman that causes the Left to go into a beserker rage and start insulting her intelligence, family and past?

Um, you don't see the Left going after Ann Richards this way, or even Lynne Cheney, or Olympia Snowe, or Condoleeza Rice - who is quite a bit more independent than Ms. Palin, given as how she's a single career person. The Left has gripes with some of the above, but Sarah Palin gets The Treatment because she acts like a goofball, not because she's "independent, conservative, and successful".

 
cloud_van_dame [TotalFark] 2009-07-05 12:32:28 AM  
Son of Thunder: Rather off-topic, but as someone who grew up in Anchorage, I'm afraid my brain has been warped to such a degree that I can't hear anyone start off their speech with "Hi, Alaska," without singing the Mafia Mike's Pizza song.

"Hi, Alaska."
"Hi, Mike!"
"I'm Mafia Mike."
"He's Mafia Mike."
"I make great pizza and I'm open all night. A family of four, can easily dine, on a extra-large pizza"
"Just eleven ninety-nine!"
"And if you're too laid, for a few bucks more, we'll deliver that pizza"
"RIGHT TO YOUR DOOR!
Mafia Mike!"
"Thanks, Alaska!"
"Mafia Mike!"


This must be the Alaska equivalent of Southern California's Cal Worthington auto dealership.

"So you want to get a deal? Go see Cal!...
Go see Cal, Go see Cal, go see Cal"
"It's Cal Worthington and his dog Spot" (Spot is a tiger).

 
lstywnch 2009-07-05 01:07:34 AM  
cloud_van_dame: This must be the Alaska equivalent of Southern California's Cal Worthington auto dealership.

"So you want to get a deal? Go see Cal!...
Go see Cal, Go see Cal, go see Cal"
"It's Cal Worthington and his dog Spot" (Spot is a tiger).


Oh, we have Cal here too. Spot is a tiger, caribou, moose, etc.

 
Gridlock 2009-07-05 02:20:12 AM  
In fact, this decision comes after much consideration, and finally polling the most important people in my life - my children (where the count was unanimous... well, in response to asking: "Want me to make a positive difference and fight for ALL our children's future from outside the Governor's office?" It was four "yes's" and one "hell yeah!" The "hell yeah" sealed it - and someday I'll talk about the details of that... I think much of it had to do with the kids seeing their baby brother Trig mocked by some pretty mean-spirited adults recently.) Um, by the way, sure wish folks could ever, ever understand that we all could learn so much from someone like Trig - I know he needs me, but I need him even more... what a child can offer to set priorities right - that time is precious... the world needs more "Trigs", not fewer.


She puts the WHA--
img529.imageshack.us
knee deep into the GARBLE.

 
Technoblake [TotalFark] 2009-07-05 02:24:55 AM  
lstywnch: So you want to get a deal? Go see Cal!...
Go see Cal, Go see Cal, go see Cal"
"It's Cal Worthington and his dog Spot" (Spot is a tiger).

Oh, we have Cal here too. Spot is a tiger, caribou, moose, etc.


Maxie Price's dog "Red" was a horse. Quite possibly the saddest man I've ever worked for.

 
Gridlock 2009-07-05 03:01:36 AM  
Gridlock: In fact, this decision comes after much consideration, and finally polling the most important people in my life - my children (where the count was unanimous... well, in response to asking: "Want me to make a positive difference and fight for ALL our children's future from outside the Governor's office?" It was four "yes's" and one "hell yeah!"

Something was bugging me about that speech paragraph I posted.

Now I know what it was.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarah_Palin (pops)
The Palins have five children: sons Track (b. 1989)[182] and Trig Paxson Van (b. April 18, 2008), and daughters Bristol Sheeran Marie[183] (b. October 18, 1990), Willow (b. 1995), and Piper (b. 2001).[184]


I wasn't aware that 1-year-old children were capable of saying "Hell Yeah!" in response to their weirdo Governor mommy when she asks them career choice questions.

 
Lenny_da_Hog 2009-07-05 03:36:22 AM  
Gridlock: Gridlock: In fact, this decision comes after much consideration, and finally polling the most important people in my life - my children (where the count was unanimous... well, in response to asking: "Want me to make a positive difference and fight for ALL our children's future from outside the Governor's office?" It was four "yes's" and one "hell yeah!"

Something was bugging me about that speech paragraph I posted.

Now I know what it was.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarah_Palin (pops)
The Palins have five children: sons Track (b. 1989)[182] and Trig Paxson Van (b. April 18, 2008), and daughters Bristol Sheeran Marie[183] (b. October 18, 1990), Willow (b. 1995), and Piper (b. 2001).[184]


I wasn't aware that 1-year-old children were capable of saying "Hell Yeah!" in response to their weirdo Governor mommy when she asks them career choice questions.


Oh. My. God.

That is so important, that she'd say "her children" when she meant "her family." There's obviously great hidden meaning here.

With so much really important shiat about this patently stupid and power-hungry woman that really has the ability to affect people's lives in the US, why do you think this is important?

I almost puked when I saw Kos had a recommended thread devoted to this.

 
technicolor-misfit 2009-07-05 05:36:45 AM  
xria - Sgt Otter: brigid_fitch: Magorn: The Palin devotees were the scariest people I've ever seen on film. I recall one middle-aged woman literally sputtering with outrage over Katie Couric's "Gotcha" questions. "What Magazines and newspapers do YOU read Katie!?" she almost hissed with outrage, apparently thinking that question would be hard for a normal human being to answer.

I've said this many times before. The right-wing nutjobs a LOT of people, not just Alexandra, filmed & posted about were just downright scary. Throughout the entire campaign, there were only 2 instances of any scary left-wing nutjobs: The woman w/the backwards B (which turned out to be BS) and the two Black Panther-like guys hanging out in front of a Philly voting station (they were there for about an hour and when asked to leave by election officials, they did.)

The left has its share of crazies, but very few are of the level of violence and danger exhibited by so many on the right.

Uh, the woman with the backwards B was a crazy right-winger. It was a staged attack to make Obama supporters seem like big, scary black racists who will attack poor, little Conservative white girls.

She was a campaign worker for Ron Paul and McCain, and claimed she was targeted because of the McCain sticker on her car.


So what you are saying is that incident was one "which turned out to be BS"?


But she shouldn't have been included as a "left-winger" at all... She was a right-winger in reality, and she made up a right-winger lie. There was no left-wingedness to her at all... factual or fictional.

Saying "which turned out to be BS" makes no sense... She was a right-winger telling a right winger story before the truth was discovered, and she was the a right-winger telling a right-winger lie after. There was never anything to connect her to the left at any point.

It's not really fair to include her story as a scary left-wingers anecdote when the scary left-wingers were completely fabricated.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-05 07:08:00 AM  
Lenny_da_Hog: Oh. My. God.

That is so important, that she'd say "her children" when she meant "her family." There's obviously great hidden meaning here.

With so much really important shiat about this patently stupid and power-hungry woman that really has the ability to affect people's lives in the US, why do you think this is important?

I almost puked when I saw Kos had a recommended thread devoted to this.


It's no biggie, really. It just adds to the patent stupidity. I did the same double-take on this, "Oh, she's calling Todd a child, because obviously Trig isn't going to be saying 'Hell yeah!' without some very odd coaching from parental figures..."

It's not important but again +! moron @ palin.

 
PartTimeBuddha 2009-07-05 07:19:17 AM  
...two instances of [stories about] any left-wing nutjobs.

 
Crabs_Can_Polevault 2009-07-05 10:38:52 AM  
Gridlock: I wasn't aware that 1-year-old children were capable of saying "Hell Yeah!" in response to their weirdo Governor mommy when she asks them career choice questions.

Telepathy.

That is all.

 
Farkomatic 2009-07-05 04:28:26 PM  
I guess her and McCain have a lot in common.

Didn't McCain quit in the middle of the campaign because of the financial crisis?

 
rnld 2009-07-05 04:37:09 PM  
Farkomatic: I guess her and McCain have a lot in common.

Didn't McCain quit in the middle of the campaign because of the financial crisis?


He just suspended the campaign to try and get out of a debate. Backfired.

 
kradio 2009-07-05 07:14:36 PM  
[reads headline] that's unpossible!

 
cefm 2009-07-06 10:01:58 AM  
images9.cafepress.com

That is all.

 
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