Bastards are slowly migrating to land. Give them five years and they'll be cutting you off in traffic.

Oh good lord.. those things are mean as hell too..
good luck with all that.
My coworker and i were just looking up some lakes in South America that have these sharks in them damn near full time.. a lake, with sharks.. bad sharks at that... good lord.

Adjective Bird Whiskey: Bastards are slowly migrating to land.

I can haz candygram?

Candygram...

and now, the mating call of the adult male mud shark...

MWWAAAAAHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

/not obscure here

I'M A SWAMP SHARK, SUCK MY DIIIIIICK!!!


/I know, old meme is old

They mix it up with gators and porpoises in the tidal creek between Sapelo and Blackbeard islands in GA...

/kayaked it
//only saw porpoises
///thank goodness

Bull sharks are everywhere, there was an attack last year in central Iraq, and have been found in Michigan if I remember correctly.

/they're fun to fish, I've heard

Tell me again why this is news? Its brackish water of course there are sharks.just like redfish, trout, etc.. Everyone PANIC!!!

"I am familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this particular problem until it swims up and bites you in the ass"

The bull shark is particularly troubling for Walker, in part due to their natural threatening nature.

Sloppily written sloppy.

damn forgot its not news...I get it! my bad.

/related
//hotlinked too!

Lou Diamond Phillips will know what to do!

oh god. we're farked now

I'll be more impressed when they have frickin' laser beams attached to their heads.

doesnt jimmy buffet have some sort of song about land sharks? he is to blame im sure

Don't worry, they have plenty of natural predators. Lawyers know how to handle competition.

I love the simplicity Mike Walker uses to express this lovely concept of our new swamp-friends.

"They have some mechanism in their make-up that allows them to process freshwater and not require high salinity to live."

Yeah, but it's their medulla oblongata that makes them so ornery.

/knows how to pronounce Atchafalaya

They have special gland in their bodies that holds salt. LRN2RSRCH. Fox has good newscasters (Hannity, etc) but shiatty writers.

Bullsharks have an internal osmotic mechanism, like some brackish fish do, to switch their water management from salt to fresh as needed. Thus, they don't get dehydrated by salt water or inflated to the point of bursting with water in fresh water. They are dangerous because they are the one shark that is actually believed to prefer humans as a form of prey, at least in India and other places with high attack numbers. Most sharks are curious. Bullsharks are mean motherfarkers.

I was wondering why every time I've been near there, I could hear something singing suck my diiiick.

They are dangerous because they are the one shark that is actually believed to prefer humans as a form of prey

I thought that honor went to tiger sharks? I know they're the only shark known to attack divers.

Like pool sharks, just stinkier.

misanthropic1: They are dangerous because they are the one shark that is actually believed to prefer humans as a form of prey

I thought that honor went to tiger sharks? I know they're the only shark known to attack divers.

Also, they forgot attorneys.

/hot

"Well, I guess this is a swamp, shark that lives in the swamp."

--Grammar Shark is confused.

Thank you, Antidamascus, that's what I came here to see.

/leaving satisfied

Awesome! I know that I'll never drive this


..ever again without knowing that these:






...are all swimming around underneath me, waiting for me to fall so they can eat me!

And if I do make it over the Atchafalaya, Tigers may very well break loose and attack!

Adjective Bird Whiskey: Bastards are slowly migrating to land. Give them five years and they'll be cutting you off in traffic.

Who didn't know that bull sharks are found in estuaries and fresh water rivers and lakes. Sheesh!

Get out of your parent's houses.

I hope this farker wasn't found in Slaughter Swamp, or we are in deep deep shiat.

Claude Ballse: And if I do make it over the Atchafalaya, Tigers may very well break loose and attack!

To hell with the Tiger Truck Stop. Animal torturers.

Or you could call it a swanky shwark.

/didn't bother to RTFA

Claude Ballse: Awesome! I know that I'll never drive this


..ever again without knowing that these:

...are all swimming around underneath me, waiting for me to fall so they can eat me!

And if I do make it over the Atchafalaya, Tigers may very well break loose and attack!

Been there, took pictures of said tiger. That poor bastard looked sad.

I'm sure he's no match for...



SALSA SHARK!

Heck for decades there was a "Lake Nicaragua Shark" until someone noticed that they were just bull sharks swimming upstream to the lake.

Ballse...
WTF is that fish? Tell me it only likes warm southern water and I may be able to keep it out of my nightmares

Calaban: Ballse...
WTF is that fish? Tell me it only likes warm southern water and I may be able to keep it out of my nightmares

it's an alligator gar I think.

I'm so tempted to record a zydeco version of The Singing Shark Song right now.

You go inside the cage, cage goes into the bayou, you go into the bayou, shark's in the bayou. Our shark, you betcha.

Calaban: Ballse...
WTF is that fish? Tell me it only likes warm southern water and I may be able to keep it out of my nightmares

Gar, and we have them in Canada. Enjoy swimming.

Sharks scare me. They aren't my friends.

Pr1nc3ss: Sharks scare me. They aren't my friends.

Of course not, chum

Gar aren't scary or mean. You can swim w/them. They'll hit you w/their tales but that's about it. My friends who live in Bayou Vista grew up swimming w/them. I only swam w/them a couple of times, but it was 20 years ago.

Well watch on on the street for the... STREET SHARKS!!

/jawsome

Claude Ballse: Awesome! I know that I'll never drive this


..ever again without knowing that these:

...are all swimming around underneath me, waiting for me to fall so they can eat me!

And if I do make it over the Atchafalaya, Tigers may very well break loose and attack!


Damn you for making me homesick!

Bull shark fishing is a Family Guy sport in Queensland Aust.

Multi story condos built right on the (artificial) canals; chuck a heavy line and baited hook over the edge of your balcony; bull sharks cruise up canal looking for scraps, stray lap dogs etc = big game fishing without boats or waves, all within 12 feet of your fridge and bbq - what's not to like?

When I was in fifth grade we took an Atchafalaya Basin flatboat tour as a field trip. It was cool; I got to get all up close and personal with the basin...just wouldn't do it now knowing those farkers are in there.


Claude Ballse, you should get a picture of the basin in mid spring.

Well, just so long as they don't get into the Amite, I don't really care.

Lewis and Clark had recorded bull sharks as far inland as the Grand Tetons.

This frightening leviathan whoemth breath spray fouled by gore and mountain thistle approaches a stealth envied by the drunkest of my savages. It can swing a cane at half a heartbeat and best a man at chess in the morning.

Bonnie Hammer is burning up the hotline to the syfy channel to pitch this as the next creature to fight a giant Boa or Mansquito.

"Swamp Sharks" starring Lorenzo Lamas (Quidado! Lamas!) as the plucky scientist and Brian Doyle Murray as the Old Cajun Bastard Hunting Guide. With special guest star Margot Kidder.

Any Pie Left: Bonnie Hammer is burning up the hotline to the syfy channel to pitch this as the next creature to fight a giant Boa or Mansquito.

"Swamp Sharks" starring Lorenzo Lamas (Quidado! Lamas!) as the plucky scientist and Brian Doyle Murray as the Old Cajun Bastard Hunting Guide. With special guest star Margot Kidder.

Damn. Your movie sounds groovy. They've been running a Twilight Zone marathon all day today (again).

/200 channels and there's nothing on.

Pr1nc3ss: Sharks scare me. They aren't my friends.

Fano: Of course not, chum

what you did there

I see it

OneFretAway:

Damn. Your movie sounds groovy. They've been running a Twilight Zone marathon all day today (again).

/200 channels and there's nothing on.

Hey screw you, buddy. Twilight Zone is still great entertainment and Rod Serling was a genius. You just don't appreciate quality television programming.

I think the stat is 26 months in fresh water.

Anyone for a nice dip at the swimming hole circa 1916?