You never know what you might find in a river, if you go in after your fishing pole.

Depends on which pole we're talking about

"If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone."

This headline is why it should be madatory that before you get a fishing license:

#1 Measure penis and weigh balls (anything under 5" flacid and under a pound (weight of balls) means no license)
#2 You must go through a boot camp similiar to green berets/army rangers
#3 NO farking manicure hands or pedicured feets
#4 Must carry a farking gun at all farking times, even in chruch, especially in a mosque
#5 NO JEWS, absolutely NO JEWS
#6 Wrestle a farking bear, nobody wants to lose their fish, and especially not a to a farking bear
#7 Drink your own urine
#8 wipe your ass with a pine-cone or porcupine
#9 No driving PRIUSes or Smart Cars (fark you when i farking fish)
#10 Eat Nails
#11 Poop Nails
#12 Must be willing to go ice fishing in the MIDDLE of the farking ICE, not near the goddamn shore you fark faces
#12 Must drive the heaviest farking machine you can find across the ice to get to your ice hole, farking a-holes
#13 Must not biatch about bugs
#14 Must not biatch
#15 Must not bring up BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN, it ain't going to happen BOB, farking stop it
#16 Bring some goddamn whiskey for farks sake
#17 NO LIGHT BEERS, fark you keystone
#18 Drink like a man and piss like a man, don't pass out after 6 beers
#19 We are there to fish not talk about your wife's farking herpie outbreak, BOB
#20 Must be willing to take a life...

Do you have any idea how much a good fly rod costs?

stealthboy: "If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone."

Whether they ever find life there or not, I think Jupiter should be considered an enemy planet.

Did not RTFA - did another woman cut off a guys tackle and toss it in the lake?

As least he won't be breeding. So there's that.

"Blow ye winds like the trumpet blows.......but without the noise."

How about we let this meme go?

Because man...it's farking old and busted.

Could the man not swim? Was it the cold? His friend was able to swim ashore. Did the guy really dive into the water for his pole without knowing how to swim?

canadianloon: This headline is why it should be madatory that before you get a fishing license:

#1 Measure penis and weigh balls (anything under 5" flacid and under a pound (weight of balls) means no license)
#2 You must go through a boot camp similiar to green berets/army rangers
#3 NO farking manicure hands or pedicured feets
#4 Must carry a farking gun at all farking times, even in chruch, especially in a mosque
#5 NO JEWS, absolutely NO JEWS
#6 Wrestle a farking bear, nobody wants to lose their fish, and especially not a to a farking bear
#7 Drink your own urine
#8 wipe your ass with a pine-cone or porcupine
#9 No driving PRIUSes or Smart Cars (fark you when i farking fish)
#10 Eat Nails
#11 Poop Nails
#12 Must be willing to go ice fishing in the MIDDLE of the farking ICE, not near the goddamn shore you fark faces
#12 Must drive the heaviest farking machine you can find across the ice to get to your ice hole, farking a-holes
#13 Must not biatch about bugs
#14 Must not biatch
#15 Must not bring up BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN, it ain't going to happen BOB, farking stop it
#16 Bring some goddamn whiskey for farks sake
#17 NO LIGHT BEERS, fark you keystone
#18 Drink like a man and piss like a man, don't pass out after 6 beers
#19 We are there to fish not talk about your wife's farking herpie outbreak, BOB
#20 Must be willing to take a life...

That's it! I'm moving to Canada!

When I was young, probably 8-10 years old, my mother dropped myself and a few friends off at a local pond, owned by a friend of my family. It was early spring, probably 50° F or so.

We caught a couple of small channel catfish, and put them on a stringer, staked into the ground.

As I was fishing I happend to see the fish up-root the stake and start swimmming off with the stringer, so without thinking I dove in and grabbed the stringer.

I still remember trying to make a fire, boy scout style (no matches, lighter etc.) while wondering if I was going to freeze to death......it was several hours before my mom came back to pick us up but it felt like DAYS.

I learned a valuable lesson that day.........a lesson that the headline summed up quite nicely.

Sometimes you just gotta let it go, man.

Subby has never fished.

Chased many a fishing pole through many a stream. Caught a few, lost a few.

I love it flatlanders come to the Rockies & wanna swim in the streams."If you're really that curious about the effects of hypothermia,be my guest"

canadianloon: This headline is why it should be madatory that before you get a fishing license:

#1 Measure penis and weigh balls (anything under 5" flacid and under a pound (weight of balls) means no license)
#2 You must go through a boot camp similiar to green berets/army rangers
#3 NO farking manicure hands or pedicured feets
#4 Must carry a farking gun at all farking times, even in chruch, especially in a mosque
#5 NO JEWS, absolutely NO JEWS
#6 Wrestle a farking bear, nobody wants to lose their fish, and especially not a to a farking bear
#7 Drink your own urine
#8 wipe your ass with a pine-cone or porcupine
#9 No driving PRIUSes or Smart Cars (fark you when i farking fish)
#10 Eat Nails
#11 Poop Nails
#12 Must be willing to go ice fishing in the MIDDLE of the farking ICE, not near the goddamn shore you fark faces
#12 Must drive the heaviest farking machine you can find across the ice to get to your ice hole, farking a-holes
#13 Must not biatch about bugs
#14 Must not biatch
#15 Must not bring up BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN, it ain't going to happen BOB, farking stop it
#16 Bring some goddamn whiskey for farks sake
#17 NO LIGHT BEERS, fark you keystone
#18 Drink like a man and piss like a man, don't pass out after 6 beers
#19 We are there to fish not talk about your wife's farking herpie outbreak, BOB
#20 Must be willing to take a life...

Im guessing you never made it past item 1 there buddy......

canadianloon: This headline is why it should be madatory that before you get a fishing license:

#1 Measure penis and weigh balls (anything under 5" flacid and under a pound (weight of balls) means no license)
#2 You must go through a boot camp similiar to green berets/army rangers
#3 NO farking manicure hands or pedicured feets
#4 Must carry a farking gun at all farking times, even in chruch, especially in a mosque
#5 NO JEWS, absolutely NO JEWS

Was enjoying this fine until #5. WTF? FAIL.

/That's how it all starts, you know, when you take a minority's fishing licenses away.

//And don't add a requirement that people be able to catch fish, or there goes mine.

I saw an ugly stick snapped in half by an angler hauling in a 40" Blue on the East River Gantry State Park pier in Long Island City last week. Instead of trying to save his rig or jumping in, he cut his line and let it go. Thankfully everybody knows to stay out of the East River.

Its_A_Tarp: How about we let this meme go?

Because man...it's farking old and busted.

PROTIP: Shoot the meme until it dies.

#5 NO JEWS, absolutely NO JEWS

Weren't most of the apostles jewish fishermen?

MemeSlave: You never know what you might find in a river, if you go in after your fishing pole.

Give it to us, it's our birthday...


/dropped by to make a smeagol reference, glad you were johnny-on-the-spot in the first

fark that, if the fish is big enough to snap your rod get the hell in there and get both the rod and the pole back.

However, it's probably a fishing story. He probably got drunk and fell in.

It was the third time in 17 years a person has drowned near the same rock outcropping on the north side of the reservoir near Nederland.

I think it's probably time to ban fishing. And water.

It doesn't actually say a fish snapped his pole. Maybe it did, maybe it didn't.

My bet is that it was a two piece rod. He screwed up the cast, breaking the line and making the top piece fly off. Then he went to retrieve the top piece. If it had simply broken with the line still intact, it would have come in as he reeled it.

Does anyone else get a spyware warning on this article when clicking on it using Google Chrome?

When an eel snaps your pole
and hides back in its hole
that's a moray

/obscure?

FarkingMonday: /obscure?

No. Catfish Hunter is not obscure.

canadianloon: This headline is why it should be madatory that before you get a fishing license:

#1 Measure penis and weigh balls (anything under 5" flacid and under a pound (weight of balls) means no license)
#2 You must go through a boot camp similiar to green berets/army rangers
#3 NO farking manicure hands or pedicured feets
#4 Must carry a farking gun at all farking times, even in chruch, especially in a mosque
#5 NO JEWS, absolutely NO JEWS
#6 Wrestle a farking bear, nobody wants to lose their fish, and especially not a to a farking bear
#7 Drink your own urine
#8 wipe your ass with a pine-cone or porcupine
#9 No driving PRIUSes or Smart Cars (fark you when i farking fish)
#10 Eat Nails
#11 Poop Nails
#12 Must be willing to go ice fishing in the MIDDLE of the farking ICE, not near the goddamn shore you fark faces
#12 Must drive the heaviest farking machine you can find across the ice to get to your ice hole, farking a-holes
#13 Must not biatch about bugs
#14 Must not biatch
#15 Must not bring up BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN, it ain't going to happen BOB, farking stop it
#16 Bring some goddamn whiskey for farks sake
#17 NO LIGHT BEERS, fark you keystone
#18 Drink like a man and piss like a man, don't pass out after 6 beers
#19 We are there to fish not talk about your wife's farking herpie outbreak, BOB
#20 Must be willing to take a life...

Wow, we have these same rules in Miami except the "no Jews" part actually reads "No Canadians"

2wolves: #5 NO JEWS, absolutely NO JEWS

Weren't most of the apostles jewish fishermen?

Exactly. They just sat around tellin ghost stories on shore all day. Find me a place in the new testament where Paul says, "whoah guys, that's enough of this bullshiat. I gotta go.. fish don't catch themselves" and you can have your license back, BOB.

My boyfriend and I were ice fishing up here in Minnesota when one of the poles we had set up suddenly got pulled under the ice. He drilled a few holes and amazingly saw the pole stuck in the weedbed. He managed to snag it with another hook and bring it up. About a foot from the top it started pulling away. The fish was still hooked to the sunken pole. My boyfriend lunged for the pole before it went down again. We got the pole back and reeled in the fish that had stolen it.

Pole? From Poland? Am I missing something. Is this not called a rod? Or is this another weird Americanism.......

I was fishing the James River Gorge last weekend and there was a drunk guy fishing and he went over the Balcony Falls (small class 3 rapid about a 6 foot drop in 7 feet of distance) in a canoe, with no life vest, and he was still fishing when he went over, and didn't even have his oar out to help himself navigate.

Needless to say his canoe flipped and he went in the drink and banged up his legs.

So, as everything from his canoe, including his oar and life-jacket go floating by, he's bobbing up and down in the fast-moving current and yelling "HELP! HELP! HELLLLP!! I can't swim"!!

So I paddled my boat over to him and hauled his drunk ass to the shore, and then he said, "I had a fish on and didn't see the falls coming" and I said "You just went over the falls on a canoe, with no life vest on, and you can't swim. You're lucky Darwin took the day off." and he said "What?", I said "nevermind".

We use fishing POLES here, not rods
Polaks are from Poland silly

/Welsh-Polish American mutt

If it is a matter of risking my life to stop Darwin from taking you, you're on your own.

I just KNEW there would be a Jack Handey reference here. Thank you.