Umm...slogan FAIL:

Staples: That was easy.
RadioShack: You've got questions, we've got answers. (though technically, their current slogan is "Do Stuff")

Subby, you suck.

zpb52: Umm...slogan FAIL:

Staples: That was easy.
RadioShack: You've got questions, we've got answers. (though technically, their current slogan is "Do Stuff")

Subby, you suck.

This. Submitter clearly doesn't work for a company that uses Staples for office supplies.

THAT WAS EASY

...if you have no idea what you're talking about.

Step One in submitting headline to Fark:

mjoven1975: zpb52: Umm...slogan FAIL:

Staples: That was easy.
RadioShack: You've got questions, we've got answers. (though technically, their current slogan is "Do Stuff")

Subby, you suck.

This. Submitter clearly doesn't work for a company that uses Staples for office supplies.

Submitter and the modmins who greenlit this.

Subby fails. That's RadioShack's slogan, not Staples!

/Former RatShat employee
//You've got questions, we've got cellphones
///And extended warranties
////And don't make commission on sales

The Zombie Jackson apacolypse is coming...

Wow, major headline fail.

11,000 tickets seems to be kind of short. Anyone want to place bets on whether there will be Michael Jackson riots?

Proposed Slogan

Staples - What we used to keep Michaels nose on.

Is his corpse actually going to be there? A memorial service doesn't have to include the body, does it?

Looks like a Canadian Football League player to me.

He's not dead. He's going to jump out of the sidewalk and dance like it's something something something...zzzzz

Dear God that was a bucket of piping hot fail.

i thought it was the best headline i've read in a long while, so good job subbie.

Subby, that was the worth headline ever. I seriously lost half of my IQ reading it. You are a disgrace, and if I ever find out who you are, I will hunt you down and kill you. I will slice your throat open and drown you in your own blood and guts. And if you have a spouse and kids, I will find them and do the same, I'll kill your cousins, anyone who means anything to you. Consider this a promise, not a threat.

In short,

i heard that it wasn't a heart attack. I heard he choked on a little bone

"There's no precedent for this," said Councilwoman Jan Perry


Wow, nobody famous has ever died before? What about that Elvis guy?

I predict a minimum of 4 people killed in the ensuing stampede.

Mark my words, and check this thread next Wednesday.

Can't wait for the jacket, glove and nose world tour.

did you guys hear that joe jackson started a record label?

cryinoutloud: Is his corpse actually going to be there? A memorial service doesn't have to include the body, does it?

Disney Animatronics workshop currently has possession of the body.
Link (new window)
Link (new window)

What a ticket shortage might look like

Biness: i heard that it wasn't a heart attack. I heard he choked on a little bone

And in weather news ...

if you hear thunder .. don't worry it's not a rain cloud

its just Elvis kicking Michael's ass for marrying his daughter

I'm glad this got greenlit, just to see the barrage of abuse that's going to get flung around in here.

American Express? Priceless!

The Dread Pirate Robertson: I'm glad this got greenlit, just to see the barrage of abuse that's going to get flung around in here.

American Express? Priceless!

Burger King: I'm lovin' it!

Already seen it:

Michael Jackson died?

AnnoyingKidNextDoor: Subby, that was the worth headline ever. I seriously lost half of my IQ reading it. You are a disgrace, and if I ever find out who you are, I will hunt you down and kill you. I will slice your throat open and drown you in your own blood and guts. And if you have a spouse and kids, I will find them and do the same, I'll kill your cousins, anyone who means anything to you. Consider this a promise, not a threat.

In short,

dude, its a blog, relax.

Biness: did you guys hear that joe jackson started a record label?


I heard something about it, I think it's called "MiLKing It Records."

Given the size crowd they're predicting, Staples seems like a poor choice. There's a reason they had the Lakers event at the Coliseum. There's not enough room for a huge crowd now that they replaced the big parking lot across the street with the Nokia Center.

Looks like someone used the deceasy button...

i just watched the oprah interview, and once he said something to the effect of, yeah i was sad for a long time, but i'm starting to become happy finally - i felt so bad for him. that was beginning the end. poor bastard

Has anyone gone to staplesstadium.com yet to see if they have crashed yet?
Just because the tickets are free don't mean they will stay free

riots I would bet on stampede not so much

Karma Curmudgeon: Looks like someone used the deceasy button...

and this thread is closed. Thank you all for coming, nothing else to see here.

pascoffee: Has anyone gone to staplesstadium.com yet to see if they have crashed yet?
Just because the tickets are free don't mean they will stay free

riots I would bet on stampede not so much

it has been, what, 28 years since the south central riots. I guess we're about due. I blame Obama.

Who is Michael Jackson?

Biness: pascoffee: Has anyone gone to staplesstadium.com yet to see if they have crashed yet?
Just because the tickets are free don't mean they will stay free

riots I would bet on stampede not so much

it has been, what, 28 years since the south central riots. I guess we're about due. I blame Obama.

strike that, 18 years. still due.

when will this be over

cryinoutloud: Is his corpse actually going to be there? A memorial service doesn't have to include the body, does it?

They refuse to answer that question.

I think that means the answer is 'YES', his body will be viewed.

If they had answered 'NO' it would alleviate much of the security issues they expect.

Sugar Bush Squirrel chimes in with the best tribute thus far

New FARK rule for posting. "Always make sure the slogan and the company match.

The history of Michael Jackson's Face (new window)

stuffy: New FARK rule for posting. "Always make sure the slogan and the company match.

Toyota Trucks: Like a Rock

Here's my theory on Michael Jackson's death.

It was a suicide. The breaking news is they just found DIPRIVAN in his home. That's used to induce a coma. You can't even get that in a drug store. That combined with anything else like Demerol is a guaranteed sleep to death. No doubt about it.

He probably planned it for a while and had no intention of living to do the London shows, but for his own legacy he wanted to get his STAPLES dress rehearsals recorded.

Inigo_Montoya: Michael Jackson died?

michael who?