Suck it, optimists!

/not good enough
//not smart enough
///gosh darn it, people don't like me

This isn't the only study to cry bullshiat against positive thinking.
There are plenty of studies to support the the power of negative thinking. (new window)

dead_dangler: "Thinking" will get you absolutely nowhere in life.
"Acting" will get you somewhere, but it may not be where you want to be
Now combine "Thinking" with "Acting", and you might just make something of yourself.

This.

Break it down thusly: Positive Thinking, Positive Acting, Negative Thinking, Negative Acting

Positive Thinking: poor planning, unrealistic expectations (no acting)

Positive Acting: making changes, breaking bad habits (does involve some thinking)

Negative Thinking: inaction, or can lead to pre-planning (what aammaazzoonn was saying?)

Negative Acting: self-sabotage, doing nothing in a bad situation (involves some thinking)

Negative thinking combined with positive acting may be the way to go. Just some thoughts.

/ought to write some self-help books on this crap
//who was it that said a cynic is a perpetually disappointed optimist?

FTFA: "I think that what happens is that when a low self-esteem person repeats positive thoughts, they probably have contradictory thoughts," Dr Wood told AFP.

"So, if they're saying 'I'm a lovable person,' they might be thinking, 'Well, I'm not always lovable' or 'I'm not lovable in this way,' and these contradictory thoughts may overwhelm the positive thoughts," she said.


It doesn't seem very surprising that if you're depressed and have a low self-opinion, merely repeating some mantra that you know damn well that you don't actually believe would just keep you focused on what your actual self-opininions ar. Furthermore, you'd likely be left feeling foolish and even more pathetic for grasping at some hollow attempt at self-fulfilling praise.

My mental view is simple and effective, it goes thusly:

I will do my best to do what benefits me. You will do your best to do what benefits you. If what benefits you does not benefit me or in some way takes away from me, I will kill you and keep doing what benefits me.

Isildur: FTFA: "I think that what happens is that when a low self-esteem person repeats positive thoughts, they probably have contradictory thoughts," Dr Wood told AFP.

"So, if they're saying 'I'm a lovable person,' they might be thinking, 'Well, I'm not always lovable' or 'I'm not lovable in this way,' and these contradictory thoughts may overwhelm the positive thoughts," she said.


It doesn't seem very surprising that if you're depressed and have a low self-opinion, merely repeating some mantra that you know damn well that you don't actually believe would just keep you focused on what your actual self-opininions ar. Furthermore, you'd likely be left feeling foolish and even more pathetic for grasping at some hollow attempt at self-fulfilling praise.


YES, WE CAN!

Scifientologist:

If what benefits you does not benefit me .... I will kill you and keep doing what benefits me.

Animals like that get put down.

SherKhan: Scifientologist:

If what benefits you does not benefit me .... I will kill you and keep doing what benefits me.

Animals like that get put down.

Just keep telling yourself that.

SherKhan: Scifientologist:

If what benefits you does not benefit me .... I will kill you and keep doing what benefits me.

Animals like that get put down.

Which, of course, becomes a much stickier prospect when the animal is of the human variety and can shoot back.

You can't out ITG me so don't try. Look closely at what you wrote and then tell me it isn't a bit psychopathic.

SherKhan: Scifientologist:

If what benefits you does not benefit me .... I will kill you and keep doing what benefits me.

Animals like that get put down rich and famous.

FTFY.

genner:

Just keep telling yourself that.

Say you have a vegetable garden. You sow and reap its benefits. You give or sell none of its produce to Scifientologist. He says he now has the right to kill you. I'm not sure if that's a sociopath or a psychopath but it ain't fully human.

Oh. Well then.

I am an ugly person who will never be rich or have sex with vast numbers of well-endowed, vivacious women. I am an ugly person who will never be rich or have sex with vast numbers of well-endowed, vivacious women. I am an ugly person who will never be rich or have sex with vast numbers of well-endowed, vivacious women...

"Not with that negative attitude!"

I was visiting my 95-year-old grandma over the weekend and suddenly she asked me if I'd ever watched this popular Christian show that's on a local station every morning. I tentatively said that I was familiar with it. She used to write a religious column for the newspaper, though she's not a big bible-thumper, and she's fairly worldly, but still, I was wary. She said, "I watched it the other morning and they said that all that's needed to fix the world is love. What a bunch of crap!"

I was a little taken aback. And impressed.

If you're upbeat and positive about bad things I'm pretty sure that makes you the devil...

/man

This study makes sense. I can't see how lying to yourself is going to make you feel better. It would seem to be better to happily accepting who you are with all your flaws and just bumble along, thank you very much.

Because I'm good enough,
And I'm smart enough,
and gosh darn it,.....
awww fark it! What's the point?

If you think that you're already loved by everyone, successful and beautiful, what would be your motivation to keep trying at life?

Affirmations are bs. The important thing is to stay hungry and work for what you want.

That's not positive thinking (what is talked about in the article) - those are self-affirmations. There's a BIG difference... You can say anything you'd like to yourself, but if you don't BELIEVE that it's true, then it doesn't really matter what you say.

Positive thinking is more about changing how you think of yourself. When you believe you have self worth, you feel good. When you believe you are worthless, you feel bad.

ishus37 Quote 2009-07-03 03:43:03 PM
If you think that you're already loved by everyone, successful and beautiful, what would be your motivation to keep trying at life?

Epic gear?

Isildur: It doesn't seem very surprising that if you're depressed and have a low self-opinion, merely repeating some mantra that you know damn well that you don't actually believe would just keep you focused on what your actual self-opininions ar. Furthermore, you'd likely be left feeling foolish and even more pathetic for grasping at some hollow attempt at self-fulfilling praise.

The rapist tried to get me to do the positive thinking thing once, and that's almost exactly why it didn't work. I feel foolish and like I'm lying to myself and wasting time, because I don't even begin to believe that people like me all that much. It's kind of hard to believe something like that when most people just look at you funny and don't respond when you try to talk to them, or they pretend they didn't hear you talking.

It is certainly an issue that should be addressed, but pretending I don't feel that way is a moronic way to do it, and suggesting such a thing really damages my ability to think that the person I'm talking to has any idea how to help me sort it out.

So, in short, I could have told them this. It wouldn't be a study, but it's true.

OOBE Juan Kenobi: That's not positive thinking (what is talked about in the article) - those are self-affirmations. There's a BIG difference... You can say anything you'd like to yourself, but if you don't BELIEVE that it's true, then it doesn't really matter what you say.

Positive thinking is more about changing how you think of yourself. When you believe you have self worth, you feel good. When you believe you are worthless, you feel bad.

Kind of hard to believe things that have no supporting evidence over things that have mountains of it. If it were as easy as deciding you really do like yourself, nobody would be depressed for long.

That's depressing.

SherKhan: genner:

Just keep telling yourself that.

Say you have a vegetable garden. You sow and reap its benefits. You give or sell none of its produce to Scifientologist. He says he now has the right to kill you. I'm not sure if that's a sociopath or a psychopath but it ain't fully human.

Most people call that a CEO or if they're bad enough a politician.

I've got all the optimism I need right here in this bottle.

Well, actually, sometimes one bottle doesn't work, so you have to drink some more optimism.

Just remember, too much optimism can be a bad thing, because you might end up seeing what you ate for lunch.

A Gentile in Boca: Poor guy, cries quietly into piles of money each night.

I don't think anybody would argue that scamming people wasn't an easy way to make money.

St_Francis_P: I just know that something good is gonna happen.


o/~ I dunno when... But sayin' it could even make it happen...

You're like my yo-yo, that glowed in the dark... What made it special, made it dangerous... So I buried it... And forget. o/~

Isildur: It doesn't seem very surprising that if you're depressed and have a low self-opinion, merely repeating some mantra that you know damn well that you don't actually believe would just keep you focused on what your actual self-opininions ar. Furthermore, you'd likely be left feeling foolish and even more pathetic for grasping at some hollow attempt at self-fulfilling praise.

Dictatorial_Flair: The rapist tried to get me to do the positive thinking thing once, and that's almost exactly why it didn't work. I feel foolish and like I'm lying to myself and wasting time, because I don't even begin to believe that people like me all that much. It's kind of hard to believe something like that when most people just look at you funny and don't respond when you try to talk to them, or they pretend they didn't hear you talking.

It is certainly an issue that should be addressed, but pretending I don't feel that way is a moronic way to do it, and suggesting such a thing really damages my ability to think that the person I'm talking to has any idea how to help me sort it out.

So, in short, I could have told them this. It wouldn't be a study, but it's true.



That first sentence of your reply made me do a double take, before I realized there was an accidental extra space causing the confusion (reminiscent of the Sean-Connery-on-Jeapordy SNL skit).

Anyway....
I obviously don't know your problems, and clearly I have no way of honestly claiming that I can tell you if most of the people that you deal with like you or not, but I can tell you this much (at the risk of me sounding like I'm trying to oversimplify things with my own poor attempt at encouragement):

I've known assholes with pretty bad social skills that still had a decent number of people that liked them. So unless you're an incredible asshole that instantly horribly offends every single person you meet, chances are there are a certain sizable percentage of people out there who will like you, as long as you indicate to them (in a non-scary way) that you like them.

I realize that's not the most inspirational statement ever uttered, but it's kind of positive, and might be something worth considering. *shrug*

/from a guy who has his own issues
// no idea if you or anyone will ever read this, given the lateness of this post