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(Shreveport Times) Fail 16-year old girl hears her mom scream and thinks she's being assaulted, so she and her friends come to her rescue with a baseball bat. Turns out mom was with her 25-year old boyfriend. Awkward   (shreveporttimes.com) divider line 104
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punk rock squirrel 2009-07-02 10:44:25 PM  
Lived in Torrington for about seven years and it seems to have gone weird(er) in the past few years. I blame WZBG's Sunday morning call in auction radio show (Swap Shop?) for bringing the weirdos to town.

 
NotaryDPO 2009-07-02 10:49:33 PM  
As a resident of the town next to Torrington, I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

/Looks nervously out window.
/Drives very quickly through Torrington, when absolutely necessary.

 
G.Carver 2009-07-02 10:52:25 PM  
this is why you wear a ball and gag

 
BlackCat23 [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:53:56 PM  
NotaryDPO: As a resident of the town next to Torrington, I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

/Looks nervously out window.
/Drives very quickly through Torrington, when absolutely necessary.


Well, let's see, the towns around us... Goshen... used to be part of torrington... Harwinton... that one too... New Hartford... floods, guitars and farms, and then there's winsted... if there's only one place worse than torrington, it's winsted...


/ONE OF US... ONE OF US....

 
Hugo Zorilla 2009-07-02 11:00:28 PM  
farkwell: was the boyfriend greek?

That's why the mom screamed....

 
cc_rider 2009-07-02 11:00:35 PM  
Ah, Torrington...

Say no more.


//Lived close enough for many years.

 
Hugo Zorilla 2009-07-02 11:01:35 PM  
TheAmazingNothing: So they took a baseball bat to the guy and he walked away with some bruises and a black eye? Heh, bunch of pansies....

No, the mom was busy with the bat...

 
Malachilenomade 2009-07-02 11:05:12 PM  
TheHopeDiamond: I give credit to the kid for taking action. True, it was the wrong (and embarrassing) action, but she got things done.

i264.photobucket.com

All in a nutshell. Say what you want, but the kid thought her mom was being hurt and took action. This could get a hero tag, as far as I'm concerned (aside from the fact that the sex guy was hurt, which is unfortunate).

 
CaptFun 2009-07-02 11:05:25 PM  
BlackCat23: said it in the redlit thread, awesome, my town, at least 3 times this in a year, has shown up on fark. Sweet. Bravo.

used to be a nice place :( Now we've gone all weird, and stuff.


Also... Torrington, Connecticut; meet Shreveport LOUsiana.

/you don't want to read the local paper online here, anyway
//your heads would all asplody
///CHEMTRAILS


Umm, it's Sleazeport to the rest of the country. You can stop pretending now.

 
CaptFun 2009-07-02 11:11:32 PM  
Malachilenomade: TheHopeDiamond: I give credit to the kid for taking action. True, it was the wrong (and embarrassing) action, but she got things done.



All in a nutshell. Say what you want, but the kid thought her mom was being hurt and took action. This could get a hero tag, as far as I'm concerned (aside from the fact that the sex guy was hurt, which is unfortunate).


And I bet you are in favor of the "Cap and Tax" crap too???
Moron.

If the kid could go find friends to come over and beat up her mothers BF, she could have called 911 faster.

 
Inibrius 2009-07-02 11:18:07 PM  
CaptFun: Malachilenomade: TheHopeDiamond: I give credit to the kid for taking action. True, it was the wrong (and embarrassing) action, but she got things done.



All in a nutshell. Say what you want, but the kid thought her mom was being hurt and took action. This could get a hero tag, as far as I'm concerned (aside from the fact that the sex guy was hurt, which is unfortunate).

And I bet you are in favor of the "Cap and Tax" crap too???
Moron.

If the kid could go find friends to come over and beat up her mothers BF, she could have called 911 faster.


You're missing a point tho. 16 year old's don't call the cops. Haven't you ever watched a horror movie?

 
limboslam 2009-07-02 11:20:37 PM  
i486.photobucket.com

 
Masso 2009-07-02 11:23:50 PM  
Pics? I need to see if it's fap worthy.

 
WFern 2009-07-02 11:31:54 PM  
razordu30: moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.


Duuuuuuuuh...


Ugh. Why did you have to pic guidettes?

 
WFern 2009-07-02 11:32:30 PM  
WFern: razordu30: moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.


Duuuuuuuuh...

Ugh. Why did you have to pick guidettes?

 
tomcatadam 2009-07-02 11:37:39 PM  
On one hand, a guy's having sex and out of nowhere some girl and her friends run in and beat the shiat out of him with bats.
On the other hand, the girl had a legitimate claim in thinking that her mother may have been being attacked.'
Farked up situation.

 
Man Going His Own Way 2009-07-02 11:39:19 PM  
Save-A-Ho syndrome. Gets them every time.

 
Oznog 2009-07-02 11:45:10 PM  
Dude is going to have to explain a black eye and all these bruises... "uh, a 16 yr old girl with a baseball bat is a force to be reckoned with, I tell you what".

Plus, I don't think you're gonna get away from the assumption that you were pederassing her. Go ahead, give a long explanation with all the details. Every word you speak only confirms that you're so committed to hiding your sins that you though up an elaborate lie.

You know what, best to stay out of bars until that shiner fades. In fact, don't go out in public at all.

 
sseye 2009-07-03 12:10:47 AM  
The daughter is 16. It's unlikely this is a case of "Zoo-keeper, those monkeys are killing each other!"

That suggests maybe this dude, somehow, deserved to get his ass beat. There's definitely more to the story.

And as a parent, WTF, who has sex so loud your kid takes action? Maybe I'm wrong, but I thought that years of deprivation, locking the door, ball gags, and padded paddles to keep the noise down were just part of responsible parenting.

 
BMulligan 2009-07-03 12:19:57 AM  
Hugo Zorilla: farkwell: was the boyfriend greek?

That's why the mom screamed....


I was anxiously scrolling through the whole thread, wondering if this fat, juicy straight line was still going to be available to exploit by the time I got to the end. Curse you for scooping it up, but kudos for being more subtle than I was going to be.

 
Alleyoop 2009-07-03 12:27:38 AM  
May I suggest a way for mom not to scream in the future?

docs.google.com

 
zefal 2009-07-03 12:36:54 AM  

 
mizchief 2009-07-03 12:40:17 AM  
motherfarker

 
VvonderJesus [TotalFark] 2009-07-03 01:04:45 AM  
Today, I heard my mom screaming, and I thought she was being assaulted. My friends and I went to get baseball bats to fight the attacker, only to discover that my mom has a 25-year-old boyfriend. FML

 
FuturePastNow [TotalFark] 2009-07-03 01:14:12 AM  
Either there's more to this story, or these peoples' combined IQ is about 200.

 
myinternetname 2009-07-03 01:14:48 AM  
Why is my local paper reporting on crap from CT ?

 
K9fark 2009-07-03 01:33:04 AM  
myinternetname: Why is my local paper reporting on crap from CT ?

Because subby stole my better headline...!

And I too moved out of Torrington 16years ago, I am spooked by how many have reported in here. Do we all know each other?

 
mreuther 2009-07-03 01:36:39 AM  
So was the trailer a double-wide?

 
geniusiknowit 2009-07-03 01:42:44 AM  
It's not news, it's Penthouse Letters.

 
modifydbear 2009-07-03 01:56:55 AM  
punk rock squirrel: Lived in Torrington for about seven years and it seems to have gone weird(er) in the past few years. I blame WZBG's Sunday morning call in auction radio show (Swap Shop?) for bringing the weirdos to town.

My mom used to host Swap Shop on WSNG in Torrington back in the day so I'm getting a kick out of this reply.

Also, found the victim's Facebook:

About Me: i have been helping a friend bale hay if anyone needs me it 2 or 3 a bale let me know ok

nuff said.

 
KrispyKritter 2009-07-03 02:25:47 AM  
It's only polite to invite the daughter to suck your toes while you're banging her momma. Anybody knows that.

 
orange storm 2009-07-03 02:54:33 AM  
I think she was in Porky's he should have used this to shut her up.
img157.imagevenue.com

 
clarkcox3 2009-07-03 04:50:43 AM  
moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.

What are you talking about? The 25 year old is with the mom, not the 16 year old.

 
PhiloBeddoe 2009-07-03 04:57:06 AM  
Motherfarker! Foodeater!

 
Shatner's Bassoon [TotalFark] 2009-07-03 05:12:04 AM  
MissFeasance:

Or, the kid thought her mom was being assaulted.


img1.fark.net

 
castufari 2009-07-03 05:55:07 AM  
If it was a farker that happened to the 16yo would have called her hawt friends over for fivesies.

/send the kids to the movies
//lock the door
///or wait until they're at school

 
andreo 2009-07-03 06:04:10 AM  
LordZorch: Yeah, it's called "Quit screwing my mom!!", and if you've ever banged a chick with kids you're run into this particular form of crap. Basically the kids are mad that you're getting what they think only their dad should be getting.

The best solution is to make sure the door is secure and keep your own baseball bat by the bed.


The best solution is to not date women with kids. I'm on the verge of ending a relationship now with a woman with kids. Nothing but heartache as anything you do, say, or ask is quickly dismissed because your not the bio-father.
And even after two years into the relationship there are still issues with the kids respecting the boundaries of our bedroom.
For example: understanding how to knock first *and* wait for an answer before entering the room. Also not rummaging through the room looking for stuff while we are away at work.

So after two years nobody can say that I didn't give the relationship a chance.

 
Jamieboy 2009-07-03 07:33:42 AM  
My younger brother called the police on my older brother and his girlfriend while they were having a very vigorous and vocal afternoon 'tea party'. He claimed he thought someone was being attacked, but knowing my younger brother, he did it out of spite, as he was and still is a real jerk off. When a neighbor saw the police show up, they called my parents at work and they came running home. How embarrassing for my older brother. The younger brother thought my older bro would get into all kinds of trouble and complained that he wasn't punished. My Dad smacked him up side the head and told him to mind his own business, grounded him, tore up his driving learners permit and said he doesn't punish his 20 year old adult sons. Our Dad was really cool.

 
bobvila136 2009-07-03 07:46:14 AM  
andreo: For example: understanding how to knock first *and* wait for an answer before entering the room. Also not rummaging through the room looking for stuff while we are away at work.

Ever heard of a lock?

 
MooseUpNorth 2009-07-03 07:57:34 AM  
About ten years ago, I'd heard my mother cry out: "No no no NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" from across the house. I ran upstairs, not knowing what I'd find, but I'd run up with a bone in my teeth ready to kill whoever'd gotten in threatening my mother.

/ Turns out someone got bankrupted on Wheel of Fortune. *rolls eyes*
// Moral of this story, kids, is that it's okay to come running, it's okay to bring the baseball bat, but take a moment to figure out what's happening first before you start swinging.

 
agsfark 2009-07-03 08:23:05 AM  
FuturePastNow: Either there's more to this story, or these peoples' combined IQ is about 200.

Why must it be either?

 
agsfark 2009-07-03 08:26:36 AM  
andreo:The best solution is to not date women with kids. I'm on the verge of ending a relationship now with a woman with kids. Nothing but heartache as anything you do, say, or ask is quickly dismissed because your not the bio-father.
And even after two years into the relationship there are still issues with the kids respecting the boundaries of our bedroom.
For example: understanding how to knock first *and* wait for an answer before entering the room. Also not rummaging through the room looking for stuff while we are away at work.

Uh...that's not dating.


 
BlackCat23 [TotalFark] 2009-07-03 09:22:03 AM  
modifydbear: punk rock squirrel: Lived in Torrington for about seven years and it seems to have gone weird(er) in the past few years. I blame WZBG's Sunday morning call in auction radio show (Swap Shop?) for bringing the weirdos to town.

My mom used to host Swap Shop on WSNG in Torrington back in the day so I'm getting a kick out of this reply.

Also, found the victim's Facebook:

About Me: i have been helping a friend bale hay if anyone needs me it 2 or 3 a bale let me know ok

nuff said.


Heynow. There's alot of farms around here, dem cows and horses need hay! There's alot better(worse?)things you could say about torrrington than that! Like, the massive drug problems. Or the prostitution. Or how the people here honestly and truely can not drive(seriously, the town is what, 5mi border to border? Only 33k people? Why does it take 20 minutes to go from one side to the other?!)

But the hay? You best leave the hay outta this...

/has hucked hay for a summer job before
//and worked at the Eblen's warehouse
///lived in the woods of burrville, it's like torrington, with more trees, and better

 
WanPhat 2009-07-03 09:27:02 AM  
I had a slingblade, some people call it a kaiser blade...

 
WTF_Are_You_Looking_At 2009-07-03 10:16:13 AM  
I find it amusing that all the people are defending the 16yrs old daughter.

The girl is 16, she's knows what enjoyable sex noises sound like!

It's more like she flirted with her mom's boyfriend and he ignored her advances because she's just a kid.

Since she's a female and think like all female out there "I'm so hot, every man should worship me"

But when a man ignored her and go on banging her mother, her ego was crushed so she got an excuse to beat him with a baseball bat.

 
BlackCat23 [TotalFark] 2009-07-03 10:55:42 AM  
WTF_Are_You_Looking_At: I find it amusing that all the people are defending the 16yrs old daughter.

The girl is 16, she's knows what enjoyable sex noises sound like!

It's more like she flirted with her mom's boyfriend and he ignored her advances because she's just a kid.

Since she's a female and think like all female out there "I'm so hot, every man should worship me"

But when a man ignored her and go on banging her mother, her ego was crushed so she got an excuse to beat him with a baseball bat.


Seriously, as much as i'd like to say this scenario is true, I've lived here for 20 years(I wasn't born here, and was raised outside the city proper), and you have NO idea how likely it is that she really was stupid enough to mistake the noises, round up a posse, and have at 'im.

I know you're sitting there in stunned disbelief, i would too if i didn't know any better. But this town is a bit... strange. people do weird shiat here. It's like a micro-condensed Florida, all our own.

/if anything, it's always amusing
//from politics, to dumb kids, this town has pretty much all of fark covered
///and we have conspiracy theorists out the youknowwhat
////CHEMTRAILS!!!

 
AnnoyingKidNextDoor 2009-07-03 12:23:59 PM  
razordu30: moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.

JAILBAIT

Duuuuuuuuh...


Heh, went to right-click and save that picture, and I accidently made it my desktop.

Whoops...

 
Kar98 2009-07-03 12:28:06 PM  
andreo: The best solution is to not date women with kids.

Dude, so very much this!

I'm on the verge of ending a relationship now with a woman with kids. Nothing but heartache as anything you do, say, or ask is quickly dismissed because your not the bio-father.
And even after two years into the relationship there are still issues with the kids respecting the boundaries of our bedroom.
For example: understanding how to knock first *and* wait for an answer before entering the room. Also not rummaging through the room looking for stuff while we are away at work.

So after two years nobody can say that I didn't give the relationship a chance.


You are, however, something of a slow learner. Should have learned your lesson after three months. Which I did, when was with one with a couple of kids for a few. Between the kids and bio-dad, and her family, I would have ranked so farking low on everybody's list of priorities, it wasn't even funny. It's like being invited to a three-some and ending up handing out fresh towels instead.
In conclusion: run away!

 
ZeroCorpse [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-03 02:06:09 PM  
Kar98: andreo: The best solution is to not date women with kids.

Dude, so very much this!


We should clarify: Don't date women with young kids. If they're college-aged, then go for it.

But yeah... Been there, done that, found out that "boyfriend" ranks lowest on every single one of her lists, below children, extended family, and babysitter.

...and it didn't help that we had a threesome, and she used that as an opportunity to come out of the closet as a lesbian, date the other woman, and dump me.

Her reasoning (aside from 'discovering' she was a lesbian) was that she trusted another female around her kids more than she trusted a male, even one that she professed to love.

Women with children suffer from temporary insanity.

 
atomhead 2009-07-03 03:07:45 PM  
I once dated a woman who was a lawyer, she was crazy, NEVER DATE LAWYERS DUDEZ THEY SUK


(ps you're stupid)

 
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