Yeah, it's called "Quit screwing my mom!!", and if you've ever banged a chick with kids you're run into this particular form of crap. Basically the kids are mad that you're getting what they think only their dad should be getting.

The best solution is to make sure the door is secure and keep your own baseball bat by the bed.

I give credit to the kid for taking action. True, it was the wrong (and embarrassing) action, but she got things done.

LordZorch: Yeah, it's called "Quit screwing my mom!!", and if you've ever banged a chick with kids you're run into this particular form of crap. Basically the kids are mad that you're getting what they think only their dad should be getting.

The best solution is to make sure the door is secure and keep your own baseball bat by the bed.

Or, the kid thought her mom was being assaulted. If the mom is that vocal, maybe she should wait until her kid is out of the house.

said it in the redlit thread, awesome, my town, at least 3 times this in a year, has shown up on fark. Sweet. Bravo.

used to be a nice place :( Now we've gone all weird, and stuff.


Also... Torrington, Connecticut; meet Shreveport LOUsiana.

/you don't want to read the local paper online here, anyway
//your heads would all asplody
///CHEMTRAILS

I just heard this story on CBS Radio News. The reporter said that the mother & the 25-year-old are no longer together.

Arnold denies she screamed. She told The Associated Press her daughter heard a slap and thought it was an assault.

So...the mom was getting spanked during sex, probably screamed, and her daughter thought she was being attacked. Understandable.

The girl, two boys and a 19-year-old man were arrested Tuesday and arraigned Wednesday on assault and conspiracy charges.

All because she was trying to save her mother. Dang.

If a few years the story from the dude will be:

Dear Penthouse Forum:

I never believed it would happen to me but I was banging this really how Cougar type when all of a sudden her daughter and some of here friends busted in and.....

So were all these people already at the house, or did she call them over and wait for them to show up before taking action? Something doesn't add up.

IMO the daughter didn't like her moms bf and came up with this excuse to beat him up.

Gilligann: So were all these people already at the house, or did she call them over and wait for them to show up before taking action? Something doesn't add up.

IMO the daughter didn't like her moms bf and came up with this excuse to beat him up.

This town is made up of alot of 2-3 family houses dating from the 1960s or earlier, and i'm going to go out on a limb here and say the family lived downtown. That puts the likelyhood of all the girl's friends lving within walking distance. And even more likely that, now that school is out, nearby partying. It's just what happens here(there's NOTHING for youngfolk to do, so they get drunk/stoned and do stupid shiat, instead)

Still, the funniest bit to me is that both possibilities are strikingly possible. It's a messed up little place...

The daughter is 16. The boyfriend is 25. How old is the mom?

penthesilea: The daughter is 16. The boyfriend is 25. How old is the mom?

She's 34.


/yeah, classy, i know
//this town is the soul reason for my personal march for a Connecticut tag
///we're a strange lil' state....

Gilligann: IMO the daughter didn't like her moms bf and came up with this excuse to beat him up.

I'm thinking you solved the case.

penthesilea: The daughter is 16. The boyfriend is 25. How old is the mom?

I hate these word problems.

Lorelle: I just heard this story on CBS Radio News. The reporter said that the mother & the 25-year-old are no longer together.

Arnold denies she screamed. She told The Associated Press her daughter heard a slap and thought it was an assault.

So...the mom was getting spanked during sex, probably screamed, and her daughter thought she was being attacked. Understandable.

The girl, two boys and a 19-year-old man were arrested Tuesday and arraigned Wednesday on assault and conspiracy charges.

All because she was trying to save her mother. Dang.



Fark that.

Mother should have sent the kids out to the mall or the movies. Or told them to F off for a couple hours and don't go near the door.

isnt this how porns start?

go away kid...i'm not hurting your mom

Mom should be in prison.

another mom of the year

I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.

penthesilea: The daughter is 16. The boyfriend is 25. How old is the mom?

BlackCat23: She's 34.

i was told there'd be no maths.

them's some weird pythagorean theorem numbers. was the boyfriend greek?

Mom?

If she had time to round up a posse, she had time to call the cops. Sounds more like an intentional beat down than a rescue.

I saw this on the wires and was wondering how long it would take to show up on Fark.

moothemagiccow I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.

I'm sorry, are we keeping you from making sense?

moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.


Duuuuuuuuh...

FunkOut: penthesilea: The daughter is 16. The boyfriend is 25. How old is the mom?

I hate these word problems.

The correct answer is "Si" and that's just a heads up.

I mean it's bizarre. You have to pick them up from school and be friendly with their parents on a regular basis and.... they're kids, they don't have money unless their parents are rich. They can't get into bars. They're not independent - ideally someone will worry where they are when they stay over at your place. It's farking weird and they look better at 19 anyway

razordu30: moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.


Duuuuuuuuh...

QUAD-UNF!

LordZorch: Yeah, it's called "Quit screwing my mom!!", and if you've ever banged a chick with kids you're run into this particular form of crap. Basically the kids are mad that you're getting what they think only their dad should be getting.

The best solution is to make sure the door is secure and keep your own baseball bat by the bed.

Between this and the WHARRGARBL that composes your profile, I can only guess you're one miserable human being.

Im currently doing subby's mom and really getting a kick out of these replies

How did this get to become news?

/didn't read

Baseball bat trifecta in play?

As guy born & raised in Torrington, I'm really getting a kick out these replies!!

Thanks the the wonderful grammar by subby half the people in this thread are confused. Article says "mother's companion" does not imply that the 25yr old = 16yr old daughters bf.


/fark u subby with a big grammatic dildo

LordZorch: Yeah, it's called "Quit screwing my mom!!", and if you've ever banged a chick with kids you're run into this particular form of crap. Basically the kids are mad that you're getting what they think only their dad should be getting.

The best solution is to make sure the door is secure and keep your own baseball bat by the bed.

Charming.

How the hell did this make the farking news?

/seriously?

razordu30: moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.


Duuuuuuuuh...

Enjoy the timeout.

FunkOut: I hate these word problems.

A friend once emailed me: 12 angry women. 12 babies. Who's the dad?

I spent about two days trying to figure out the answer to this "riddle" before she told me she had just been watching Jerry Springer.

/fark u subby with a big grammatic dildo

I think it's a grammatical dildo.

/got your back

The headline contains a vague pronoun reference.

Josu: FunkOut: I hate these word problems.

A friend once emailed me: 12 angry women. 12 babies. Who's the dad?

I spent about two days trying to figure out the answer to this "riddle" before she told me she had just been watching Jerry Springer.

lol Real life always trumps fiction.

/Or atleast the type of "real life" Springer tries to sell on his show.

Not news

Would be a great fark headline except that, apparently, from RTFA, it didn't happen

Note to self:
Flip kid movie/drug money after securing booty call.

Penalty on subby for inappropriate pronoun use. 10 yards from the line of scrimmage, still first down.

ZzeusS:
Mother should have sent the kids out to the mall or the movies. Or told them to F off for a couple hours and don't go near the door.

"Mommy's getting some nookie. Here's five bucks, kid. Go play in traffic."

why is this in the shreveport la paper?

Why the assault charges? Obviously, they like the rough stuff. A few bruises are part of the game.

/ Window seat please

So they took a baseball bat to the guy and he walked away with some bruises and a black eye? Heh, bunch of pansies....

If you know Torrington you're not surprised by this story. If you don't know Torrington, now you do know Torrington.

/got the hell out of Torrington 16 years ago

Lived in Torrington for about seven years and it seems to have gone weird(er) in the past few years. I blame WZBG's Sunday morning call in auction radio show (Swap Shop?) for bringing the weirdos to town.

As a resident of the town next to Torrington, I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

/Looks nervously out window.
/Drives very quickly through Torrington, when absolutely necessary.

this is why you wear a ball and gag

NotaryDPO: As a resident of the town next to Torrington, I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

/Looks nervously out window.
/Drives very quickly through Torrington, when absolutely necessary.

Well, let's see, the towns around us... Goshen... used to be part of torrington... Harwinton... that one too... New Hartford... floods, guitars and farms, and then there's winsted... if there's only one place worse than torrington, it's winsted...


/ONE OF US... ONE OF US....

farkwell: was the boyfriend greek?

That's why the mom screamed....

Ah, Torrington...

Say no more.


//Lived close enough for many years.

TheAmazingNothing: So they took a baseball bat to the guy and he walked away with some bruises and a black eye? Heh, bunch of pansies....

No, the mom was busy with the bat...

TheHopeDiamond: I give credit to the kid for taking action. True, it was the wrong (and embarrassing) action, but she got things done.



All in a nutshell. Say what you want, but the kid thought her mom was being hurt and took action. This could get a hero tag, as far as I'm concerned (aside from the fact that the sex guy was hurt, which is unfortunate).

BlackCat23: said it in the redlit thread, awesome, my town, at least 3 times this in a year, has shown up on fark. Sweet. Bravo.

used to be a nice place :( Now we've gone all weird, and stuff.


Also... Torrington, Connecticut; meet Shreveport LOUsiana.

/you don't want to read the local paper online here, anyway
//your heads would all asplody
///CHEMTRAILS

Umm, it's Sleazeport to the rest of the country. You can stop pretending now.

Malachilenomade: TheHopeDiamond: I give credit to the kid for taking action. True, it was the wrong (and embarrassing) action, but she got things done.



All in a nutshell. Say what you want, but the kid thought her mom was being hurt and took action. This could get a hero tag, as far as I'm concerned (aside from the fact that the sex guy was hurt, which is unfortunate).

And I bet you are in favor of the "Cap and Tax" crap too???
Moron.

If the kid could go find friends to come over and beat up her mothers BF, she could have called 911 faster.

CaptFun: Malachilenomade: TheHopeDiamond: I give credit to the kid for taking action. True, it was the wrong (and embarrassing) action, but she got things done.



All in a nutshell. Say what you want, but the kid thought her mom was being hurt and took action. This could get a hero tag, as far as I'm concerned (aside from the fact that the sex guy was hurt, which is unfortunate).

And I bet you are in favor of the "Cap and Tax" crap too???
Moron.

If the kid could go find friends to come over and beat up her mothers BF, she could have called 911 faster.

You're missing a point tho. 16 year old's don't call the cops. Haven't you ever watched a horror movie?

Pics? I need to see if it's fap worthy.

razordu30: moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.


Duuuuuuuuh...

Ugh. Why did you have to pic guidettes?

WFern: razordu30: moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.


Duuuuuuuuh...

Ugh. Why did you have to pick guidettes?

On one hand, a guy's having sex and out of nowhere some girl and her friends run in and beat the shiat out of him with bats.
On the other hand, the girl had a legitimate claim in thinking that her mother may have been being attacked.'
Farked up situation.

Save-A-Ho syndrome. Gets them every time.

Dude is going to have to explain a black eye and all these bruises... "uh, a 16 yr old girl with a baseball bat is a force to be reckoned with, I tell you what".

Plus, I don't think you're gonna get away from the assumption that you were pederassing her. Go ahead, give a long explanation with all the details. Every word you speak only confirms that you're so committed to hiding your sins that you though up an elaborate lie.

You know what, best to stay out of bars until that shiner fades. In fact, don't go out in public at all.

The daughter is 16. It's unlikely this is a case of "Zoo-keeper, those monkeys are killing each other!"

That suggests maybe this dude, somehow, deserved to get his ass beat. There's definitely more to the story.

And as a parent, WTF, who has sex so loud your kid takes action? Maybe I'm wrong, but I thought that years of deprivation, locking the door, ball gags, and padded paddles to keep the noise down were just part of responsible parenting.

Hugo Zorilla: farkwell: was the boyfriend greek?

That's why the mom screamed....

I was anxiously scrolling through the whole thread, wondering if this fat, juicy straight line was still going to be available to exploit by the time I got to the end. Curse you for scooping it up, but kudos for being more subtle than I was going to be.

May I suggest a way for mom not to scream in the future?

motherfarker

Today, I heard my mom screaming, and I thought she was being assaulted. My friends and I went to get baseball bats to fight the attacker, only to discover that my mom has a 25-year-old boyfriend. FML

Either there's more to this story, or these peoples' combined IQ is about 200.

Why is my local paper reporting on crap from CT ?

myinternetname: Why is my local paper reporting on crap from CT ?

Because subby stole my better headline...!

And I too moved out of Torrington 16years ago, I am spooked by how many have reported in here. Do we all know each other?

So was the trailer a double-wide?

It's not news, it's Penthouse Letters.

punk rock squirrel: Lived in Torrington for about seven years and it seems to have gone weird(er) in the past few years. I blame WZBG's Sunday morning call in auction radio show (Swap Shop?) for bringing the weirdos to town.

My mom used to host Swap Shop on WSNG in Torrington back in the day so I'm getting a kick out of this reply.

Also, found the victim's Facebook:

About Me: i have been helping a friend bale hay if anyone needs me it 2 or 3 a bale let me know ok

nuff said.

It's only polite to invite the daughter to suck your toes while you're banging her momma. Anybody knows that.

I think she was in Porky's he should have used this to shut her up.

moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.

What are you talking about? The 25 year old is with the mom, not the 16 year old.

Motherfarker! Foodeater!

MissFeasance:

Or, the kid thought her mom was being assaulted.

If it was a farker that happened to the 16yo would have called her hawt friends over for fivesies.

/send the kids to the movies
//lock the door
///or wait until they're at school

LordZorch: Yeah, it's called "Quit screwing my mom!!", and if you've ever banged a chick with kids you're run into this particular form of crap. Basically the kids are mad that you're getting what they think only their dad should be getting.

The best solution is to make sure the door is secure and keep your own baseball bat by the bed.

The best solution is to not date women with kids. I'm on the verge of ending a relationship now with a woman with kids. Nothing but heartache as anything you do, say, or ask is quickly dismissed because your not the bio-father.
And even after two years into the relationship there are still issues with the kids respecting the boundaries of our bedroom.
For example: understanding how to knock first *and* wait for an answer before entering the room. Also not rummaging through the room looking for stuff while we are away at work.

So after two years nobody can say that I didn't give the relationship a chance.

My younger brother called the police on my older brother and his girlfriend while they were having a very vigorous and vocal afternoon 'tea party'. He claimed he thought someone was being attacked, but knowing my younger brother, he did it out of spite, as he was and still is a real jerk off. When a neighbor saw the police show up, they called my parents at work and they came running home. How embarrassing for my older brother. The younger brother thought my older bro would get into all kinds of trouble and complained that he wasn't punished. My Dad smacked him up side the head and told him to mind his own business, grounded him, tore up his driving learners permit and said he doesn't punish his 20 year old adult sons. Our Dad was really cool.

andreo: For example: understanding how to knock first *and* wait for an answer before entering the room. Also not rummaging through the room looking for stuff while we are away at work.

Ever heard of a lock?

About ten years ago, I'd heard my mother cry out: "No no no NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" from across the house. I ran upstairs, not knowing what I'd find, but I'd run up with a bone in my teeth ready to kill whoever'd gotten in threatening my mother.

/ Turns out someone got bankrupted on Wheel of Fortune. *rolls eyes*
// Moral of this story, kids, is that it's okay to come running, it's okay to bring the baseball bat, but take a moment to figure out what's happening first before you start swinging.

FuturePastNow: Either there's more to this story, or these peoples' combined IQ is about 200.

Why must it be either?

modifydbear: punk rock squirrel: Lived in Torrington for about seven years and it seems to have gone weird(er) in the past few years. I blame WZBG's Sunday morning call in auction radio show (Swap Shop?) for bringing the weirdos to town.

My mom used to host Swap Shop on WSNG in Torrington back in the day so I'm getting a kick out of this reply.

Also, found the victim's Facebook:

About Me: i have been helping a friend bale hay if anyone needs me it 2 or 3 a bale let me know ok

nuff said.

Heynow. There's alot of farms around here, dem cows and horses need hay! There's alot better(worse?)things you could say about torrrington than that! Like, the massive drug problems. Or the prostitution. Or how the people here honestly and truely can not drive(seriously, the town is what, 5mi border to border? Only 33k people? Why does it take 20 minutes to go from one side to the other?!)

But the hay? You best leave the hay outta this...

/has hucked hay for a summer job before
//and worked at the Eblen's warehouse
///lived in the woods of burrville, it's like torrington, with more trees, and better

I had a slingblade, some people call it a kaiser blade...

I find it amusing that all the people are defending the 16yrs old daughter.

The girl is 16, she's knows what enjoyable sex noises sound like!

It's more like she flirted with her mom's boyfriend and he ignored her advances because she's just a kid.

Since she's a female and think like all female out there "I'm so hot, every man should worship me"

But when a man ignored her and go on banging her mother, her ego was crushed so she got an excuse to beat him with a baseball bat.

WTF_Are_You_Looking_At: I find it amusing that all the people are defending the 16yrs old daughter.

The girl is 16, she's knows what enjoyable sex noises sound like!

It's more like she flirted with her mom's boyfriend and he ignored her advances because she's just a kid.

Since she's a female and think like all female out there "I'm so hot, every man should worship me"

But when a man ignored her and go on banging her mother, her ego was crushed so she got an excuse to beat him with a baseball bat.

Seriously, as much as i'd like to say this scenario is true, I've lived here for 20 years(I wasn't born here, and was raised outside the city proper), and you have NO idea how likely it is that she really was stupid enough to mistake the noises, round up a posse, and have at 'im.

I know you're sitting there in stunned disbelief, i would too if i didn't know any better. But this town is a bit... strange. people do weird shiat here. It's like a micro-condensed Florida, all our own.

/if anything, it's always amusing
//from politics, to dumb kids, this town has pretty much all of fark covered
///and we have conspiracy theorists out the youknowwhat
////CHEMTRAILS!!!

razordu30: moothemagiccow: I can understand completely why a 16 y/o would go out with a 25 y/o - he likely has a car and a job and can buy things (it's still creepy), but I can never figure out why a 25 year old would go out with a 16 year old.

JAILBAIT

Duuuuuuuuh...

Heh, went to right-click and save that picture, and I accidently made it my desktop.

Whoops...

andreo: The best solution is to not date women with kids.

Dude, so very much this!

I'm on the verge of ending a relationship now with a woman with kids. Nothing but heartache as anything you do, say, or ask is quickly dismissed because your not the bio-father.
And even after two years into the relationship there are still issues with the kids respecting the boundaries of our bedroom.
For example: understanding how to knock first *and* wait for an answer before entering the room. Also not rummaging through the room looking for stuff while we are away at work.

So after two years nobody can say that I didn't give the relationship a chance.

You are, however, something of a slow learner. Should have learned your lesson after three months. Which I did, when was with one with a couple of kids for a few. Between the kids and bio-dad, and her family, I would have ranked so farking low on everybody's list of priorities, it wasn't even funny. It's like being invited to a three-some and ending up handing out fresh towels instead.
In conclusion: run away!

Kar98: andreo: The best solution is to not date women with kids.

Dude, so very much this!

We should clarify: Don't date women with young kids. If they're college-aged, then go for it.

But yeah... Been there, done that, found out that "boyfriend" ranks lowest on every single one of her lists, below children, extended family, and babysitter.

...and it didn't help that we had a threesome, and she used that as an opportunity to come out of the closet as a lesbian, date the other woman, and dump me.

Her reasoning (aside from 'discovering' she was a lesbian) was that she trusted another female around her kids more than she trusted a male, even one that she professed to love.

Women with children suffer from temporary insanity.

I once dated a woman who was a lawyer, she was crazy, NEVER DATE LAWYERS DUDEZ THEY SUK


(ps you're stupid)

Cool!!! Maybe we'll get a tag like Florida has.

MooseUpNorth: About ten years ago, I'd heard my mother cry out: "No no no NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" from across the house. I ran upstairs, not knowing what I'd find, but I'd run up with a bone in my teeth ready to kill whoever'd gotten in threatening my mother.

/ Turns out someone got bankrupted on Wheel of Fortune. *rolls eyes*
// Moral of this story, kids, is that it's okay to come running, it's okay to bring the baseball bat, but take a moment to figure out what's happening first before you start swinging.

You may be too rational for FARK.
I think I like ya.

/approves

MissFeasance: Or, the kid thought her mom was being assaulted. If the mom is that vocal, maybe she should wait until her kid is out of the house.

The odds on that are pretty farking small.

Read the article - mom isn't a screamer....