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(Slate) Spiffy Want to strip then write a book? Here are common themes: You're someone we'd least suspect. But stripping feels strangely natural. And you're not like the ones doing it for meth   (doublex.com) divider line 91
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Pocket Ninja [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 09:55:39 AM  
Want to be a politician then write a book? Here are common themes: You're someone we'd least expect. But politics feels strangely natural. And you're not like the ones doing it for self-enrichment.

Want to be a lawyer then write a book? Here are common themes: You're someone we'd least expect. But law feels strangely natural. And you're not like the ambulance chasers.

Want to be a rock star then write a book? Here are common themes: You're someone we'd least expect. But singing feels strangely natural. And you're not like the gay coke-snorting hair bands.

Want to be an actor then write a book? Here are common themes: You're someone we'd least expect. But acting feels strangely natural. And you're not like those attention whore prima donnas.

Want to be a civil rights leader then write a book? Here are common themes: You're someone we'd least expect. But community organizing feels strangely natural. And you're not like those other blinded ideologues.

Want to be a terrorist then write a book? Here are common themes: You're someone we'd least expect. But terrorism feels strangely natural. And you're not like those other psychopaths.

 
sigdiamond2000 [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:08:21 AM  
Our heroine has a feminist interpretation of the strip club world that she would like to share. This feminist interpretation may be hopelessly confused, often contradictory, and sometimes incoherent, but the author will nonetheless drape her experiences with women's studies jargon.

Heh. So true.

I read an interview with porn star Sasha Grey recently where she basically attempts this same gambit to justify her career choice. It was pathetically transparent and sad.

Yeah, honey, I'm sure all those guys who are f*cking you in the ass and making you eat cum really respect the fact that you've read Sexual Politics and are "self-aware".

 
Playerslight 2009-07-02 10:08:48 AM  
But...I'm *not* like those other attention whore prima donnas.

 
baby dinosaurs [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:12:32 AM  
Stripper memoirs are only appropriate as picture books.

 
Shostie [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:13:58 AM  
Is this like a Diablo Cody article or something?

 
Instant Karma 2009-07-02 10:14:01 AM  
baby dinosaurs: Stripper memoirs are only appropriate as picture books.

Don't you mean Pop-Up books?

 
lukelightning 2009-07-02 10:16:24 AM  
Instant Karma: baby dinosaurs: Stripper memoirs are only appropriate as picture books.

Don't you mean Pop-Up books?


Or Choose Your Own Adventure/

"Do you go into the Champagne Room? Turn to page 37..."

 
baby dinosaurs [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:17:19 AM  
Instant Karma: baby dinosaurs: Stripper memoirs are only appropriate as picture books.

Don't you mean Pop-Up books?


The pages and back cover should have a hole to set on your lap and fasten over your penis.
As you turn each page, your penis can go on a different adventure inside a different orifice.

/totally patenting this idea

 
unchellmatt 2009-07-02 10:18:20 AM  
web.mit.edu

 
blazemongr 2009-07-02 10:20:07 AM  
Normally you have to write and publish the book before you can strip it.

/ooh, baby, just take that book jacket all the way off already
//i'd love to caress your naked spine
///do you have a happy ending?

 
Crotchrocket Slim 2009-07-02 10:23:40 AM  
sigdiamond2000: Our heroine has a feminist interpretation of the strip club world that she would like to share. This feminist interpretation may be hopelessly confused, often contradictory, and sometimes incoherent, but the author will nonetheless drape her experiences with women's studies jargon.

Heh. So true.

I read an interview with porn star Sasha Grey recently where she basically attempts this same gambit to justify her career choice. It was pathetically transparent and sad.

Yeah, honey, I'm sure all those guys who are f*cking you in the ass and making you eat cum really respect the fact that you've read Sexual Politics and are "self-aware".


I've always figured she'd be better off saying something to the effect of "it's my body, and I can profit off of selling the fantasy surrounding it. How does this differ from an engineer charging a client for his engineering expertise? So I'm not a crypto-communist like most of those neo-feminist types."

Too bad she went right into porn instead of hanging out a little in undergrad college first.

 
dittybopper [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:23:55 AM  
sigdiamond2000: Blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah f*cking you in the ass and making you eat cum blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah

That's how your post looked to me.

 
CrankMyBlueSax 2009-07-02 10:24:56 AM  
That was the most un-sexy article about strippers I have ever read.

 
Fano 2009-07-02 10:25:08 AM  
sigdiamond2000: Our heroine has a feminist interpretation of the strip club world that she would like to share. This feminist interpretation may be hopelessly confused, often contradictory, and sometimes incoherent, but the author will nonetheless drape her experiences with women's studies jargon.

Heh. So true.

I read an interview with porn star Sasha Grey recently where she basically attempts this same gambit to justify her career choice. It was pathetically transparent and sad.

Yeah, honey, I'm sure all those guys who are f*cking you in the ass and making you eat cum really respect the fact that you've read Sexual Politics and are "self-aware".


Oh shiat. Did she pull the "I'm a Good Girl, not one of those nasty stripper sluts card?"

Stripping isn't any more degrading than a lot of jobs but all the drug use that tends to come with it is.

 
Another Government Employee 2009-07-02 10:26:05 AM  
Bottom line?

STFU. You're screwing with the fantasy.

 
Rapmaster2000 2009-07-02 10:27:12 AM  
sigdiamond2000: Our heroine has a feminist interpretation of the strip club world that she would like to share. This feminist interpretation may be hopelessly confused, often contradictory, and sometimes incoherent, but the author will nonetheless drape her experiences with women's studies jargon.

Heh. So true.

I read an interview with porn star Sasha Grey recently where she basically attempts this same gambit to justify her career choice. It was pathetically transparent and sad.

Yeah, honey, I'm sure all those guys who are f*cking you in the ass and making you eat cum really respect the fact that you've read Sexual Politics and are "self-aware".


The new media gabfest over Sasha Grey is for squares. Her po-mo slut thing is meant to titillate and shock housewives who think of themselves as edgy and with it. For the jaded audience (that would include Fark), it's annoying bullshiat.

Basically, Sasha Grey is edgy and controversial if you think being a ho is edgy and controversial.

 
SherKhan 2009-07-02 10:27:28 AM  
img2.timeinc.net

Say something nice about Diablo Cody.

iamcartoonist.com

I . . . envy the tattoo artist who had that huge canvas of arm fat to work with.

 
sigdiamond2000 [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:27:36 AM  
And, just to be clear, I'm not saying that there isn't a feminist justification for stripping/working in porn, because there probably is. But as the author states, it's often horribly convoluted and assumes that the men involved are somehow not objectifying/degrading them simply because they are somehow more aware of the nature of the relationship. That assumes a level of nuance that men simply aren't capable of.

I know someone who is, shall we say, "in the business." She's very intelligent and certainly doesn't fit the mold for someone in her line of work. But it never ceases to amaze me, after all she's done and how smart she is, how little she truly understands about the male gender and the nature of our sexuality.

 
tshetter 2009-07-02 10:28:11 AM  
Another Government Employee: Bottom line?

STFU. You're screwing with the fantasy.


The neon lights and disco ball reflecting off the tears running down her cheeks as she grinds to Girls, Girls, Girls is the best part of the show.

 
Instant Karma 2009-07-02 10:29:26 AM  
baby dinosaurs: Instant Karma: baby dinosaurs: Stripper memoirs are only appropriate as picture books.

Don't you mean Pop-Up books?

The pages and back cover should have a hole to set on your lap and fasten over your penis.
As you turn each page, your penis can go on a different adventure inside a different orifice.

/totally patenting this idea


Paper-cuts are bad enough, but cardboard? Holy Shnikes.

 
Fano 2009-07-02 10:30:58 AM  
sigdiamond2000: And, just to be clear, I'm not saying that there isn't a feminist justification for stripping/working in porn, because there probably is. But as the author states, it's often horribly convoluted and assumes that the men involved are somehow not objectifying/degrading them simply because they are somehow more aware of the nature of the relationship. That assumes a level of nuance that men simply aren't capable of.

I know someone who is, shall we say, "in the business." She's very intelligent and certainly doesn't fit the mold for someone in her line of work. But it never ceases to amaze me, after all she's done and how smart she is, how little she truly understands about the male gender and the nature of our sexuality.


FTA:This reflection on another girl's morality is interesting, because however much our heroine revels in her naughtiness-and she does revel-she is at pains to tell us that she is not promiscuous like the other girls. Even in this genre, which is almost explicitly about how we shouldn't judge the naked girl on the stage, we find the same judgment, the same innate, catty, female dividing of the world into sluts and non-sluts, that takes place in the rest of the world.

It appears that woman are capable only of pseudo-nuance.

 
untaken_name 2009-07-02 10:31:16 AM  
4 page article with about 2 paragraphs per page? No thanks, I'm not that interested. Fark you, Slate.

 
xbattlewax 2009-07-02 10:31:17 AM  
I don't need a book, I just talk to people about it. It's a rough business and I've seen it mentally and physically wear down a lot of people... Too many people.

I got out and will never go back, I had my fun but in the end it wasn't really worth it.

/Worked as a Dj for 10 years in a strip club

 
tshetter 2009-07-02 10:31:17 AM  
sigdiamond2000: And, just to be clear, I'm not saying that there isn't a feminist justification for stripping/working in porn, because there probably is. But as the author states, it's often horribly convoluted and assumes that the men involved are somehow not objectifying/degrading them simply because they are somehow more aware of the nature of the relationship. That assumes a level of nuance that men simply aren't capable of.

I know someone who is, shall we say, "in the business." She's very intelligent and certainly doesn't fit the mold for someone in her line of work. But it never ceases to amaze me, after all she's done and how smart she is, how little she truly understands about the male gender and the nature of our sexuality.


There are a few out there that seem to get this, Jenna Jameson, Jenna Haze, Stoya, and a lot of the euro women.

It takes a strong woman to work in a male dominated industry, make good money, and not get brought down.

 
PaisleyHunter 2009-07-02 10:31:56 AM  
I always feel I should comment in these type of threads because my fark handle is a the name of a porn actress who I met and she was on meth. or crank. or whatever the kids are calling it these days.

 
Fano 2009-07-02 10:33:57 AM  
xbattlewax: I don't need a book, I just talk to people about it. It's a rough business and I've seen it mentally and physically wear down a lot of people... Too many people.

I got out and will never go back, I had my fun but in the end it wasn't really worth it.

/Worked as a Dj for 10 years in a strip club


OMG, did you have "the Voice?"

Every club I've seen has a DJ with an identical voice to the last - with lots of stock phrases. "Gentlemen, look up to the center stage, here comes Diamond! She's got more hot ass than a Texas donkey farm!"

 
baby dinosaurs [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:34:43 AM  
Instant Karma: The pages and back cover should have a hole to set on your lap and fasten over your penis.
As you turn each page, your penis can go on a different adventure inside a different orifice.
/totally patenting this idea

Paper-cuts are bad enough, but cardboard? Holy Shnikes.


Wait till your wife hits menopause.

 
xbattlewax 2009-07-02 10:34:46 AM  
sigdiamond2000: And, just to be clear, I'm not saying that there isn't a feminist justification for stripping/working in porn, because there probably is. But as the author states, it's often horribly convoluted and assumes that the men involved are somehow not objectifying/degrading them simply because they are somehow more aware of the nature of the relationship. That assumes a level of nuance that men simply aren't capable of.

I know someone who is, shall we say, "in the business." She's very intelligent and certainly doesn't fit the mold for someone in her line of work. But it never ceases to amaze me, after all she's done and how smart she is, how little she truly understands about the male gender and the nature of our sexuality.


What's her age? I know a similar woman like that and I think it's due to her age. I know the younger bright ones don't think like the older ones. If they don't fit the mold and are intelligent, they end up leaving only then understanding after gaining perspective.

 
Rapmaster2000 2009-07-02 10:34:49 AM  
xbattlewax: I don't need a book, I just talk to people about it. It's a rough business and I've seen it mentally and physically wear down a lot of people... Too many people.

I got out and will never go back, I had my fun but in the end it wasn't really worth it.

/Worked as a Dj for 10 years in a strip club


Can you do that "strip club DJ" voice?

"HEY guys don't forget to tip your waitresses and now lets give it up for Ecs.ta.syyyyyyyy"

 
ObscureNameHere 2009-07-02 10:36:13 AM  
PaisleyHunter: I always feel I should comment in these type of threads because my fark handle is a the name of a porn actress who I met and she was on meth. or crank. or whatever the kids are calling it these days.

Did you meet her or meat her?

 
xbattlewax 2009-07-02 10:36:55 AM  
Rapmaster2000: xbattlewax: I don't need a book, I just talk to people about it. It's a rough business and I've seen it mentally and physically wear down a lot of people... Too many people.

I got out and will never go back, I had my fun but in the end it wasn't really worth it.

/Worked as a Dj for 10 years in a strip club

Can you do that "strip club DJ" voice?

"HEY guys don't forget to tip your waitresses and now lets give it up for Ecs.ta.syyyyyyyy"


haha Yes, I did that. Funny thing is how we all do sound a lot alike and don't do it on purpose. I would get bored and had a vocal changer so occasionally I would make myself sound like a woman, just to throw people off.

 
Shut_up_and_fark_me 2009-07-02 10:37:58 AM  
My name is Tiffani and my dad left when I was two so my mom moved in with a long-distance truck driver who was also an alcoholic and I never finished high school but I got a GED.

I'm EXACTLY who you'd suspect.

 
unchellmatt 2009-07-02 10:41:36 AM  
baby dinosaurs "Instant Karma: The pages and back cover should have a hole to set on your lap and fasten over your penis.
As you turn each page, your penis can go on a different adventure inside a different orifice.
/totally patenting this idea

Paper-cuts are bad enough, but cardboard? Holy Shnikes.

Wait till your wife hits menopause."


Oh bravo. Bravo.

web.mit.edu

 
tshetter 2009-07-02 10:41:40 AM  
Shut_up_and_fark_me: My name is Tiffani and my dad left when I was two so my mom moved in with a long-distance truck driver who was also an alcoholic and I never finished high school but I got a GED.

I'm EXACTLY who you'd suspect.


Ive got a case of busch light and some ez-mac at the trailer for us punkin

 
lukelightning 2009-07-02 10:43:43 AM  
xbattlewax: I would make myself sound like a woman, just to throw people off.

I would think that a woman stripper DJ would have a lot of appeal.

 
swahnhennessy 2009-07-02 10:48:26 AM  
FTFA:Are all naked women pretty much the same? Reading stripper memoirs would lead one to think so. It is a surprisingly rigid genre

Heh, heh...

 
Sarcastica75 [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:48:33 AM  
Meh, I've edited worse.

 
Instant Karma 2009-07-02 10:48:41 AM  
Shut_up_and_fark_me: My name is Tiffani and my dad left when I was two so my mom moved in with a long-distance truck driver who was also an alcoholic and I never finished high school but I got a GED.

I'm EXACTLY who you'd suspect.


So you're more of a Baltic Ave girl than the Marvin Gardens types that frequent FARK?

 
stainedglassdoll 2009-07-02 10:49:32 AM  
baby dinosaurs: Instant Karma: baby dinosaurs: Stripper memoirs are only appropriate as picture books.

Don't you mean Pop-Up books?

The pages and back cover should have a hole to set on your lap and fasten over your penis.
As you turn each page, your penis can go on a different adventure inside a different orifice.

/totally patenting this idea


This book exists. I would look it up, but I'm at work (anyone else want to look for it?). But I have seen such a book with my own eyes.

 
dittybopper [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-02 10:50:49 AM  
swahnhennessy: FTFA:Are all naked women pretty much the same? Reading stripper memoirs would lead one to think so. It is a surprisingly rigid genre

Heh, heh...


It's not funny. Turgid prose is hard to read.

 
Im_Gumby 2009-07-02 10:55:32 AM  
Instant Karma: baby dinosaurs: Instant Karma: baby dinosaurs: Stripper memoirs are only appropriate as picture books.

Don't you mean Pop-Up books?

The pages and back cover should have a hole to set on your lap and fasten over your penis.
As you turn each page, your penis can go on a different adventure inside a different orifice.

/totally patenting this idea

Paper-cuts are bad enough, but cardboard? Holy Shnikes.


You haven't lived until you've gotten a papercut from board fresh off the corrugator, while the starch is still hot.

/good times
//Pkg Eng FTW!

 
madmann [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 11:02:37 AM  
Instant Karma: Shut_up_and_fark_me: My name is Tiffani and my dad left when I was two so my mom moved in with a long-distance truck driver who was also an alcoholic and I never finished high school but I got a GED.

I'm EXACTLY who you'd suspect.

So you're more of a Baltic Ave girl than the Marvin Gardens types that frequent FARK?


Sounds more like a Community Chest.

Ba-dum-CHING!

 
Scoop84 2009-07-02 11:03:07 AM  
Shut_up_and_fark_me: I got a GED.

Move on, honey. I don't like a dancer who's smarter than me.

 
reillan 2009-07-02 11:05:52 AM  
dittybopper: swahnhennessy: FTFA:Are all naked women pretty much the same? Reading stripper memoirs would lead one to think so. It is a surprisingly rigid genre

Heh, heh...

It's not funny. Turgid prose is hard to read.


And yet, here we are.

 
evilgreg [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 11:06:48 AM  
lukelightning: Or Choose Your Own Adventure/

"Do you go into the Champagne Room? Turn to page 37..."


There is no sex on page 37.

 
Xlr8urfark 2009-07-02 11:06:53 AM  
Rapmaster2000: "HEY guys don't forget to tip your waitresses and now lets give it up for Ecs.ta.syyyyyyyy"

Haha, One thing I learned about strip club dj's is don't walk up to them and try and strike up a conversation about what music they play on their own time.

 
Pxtl 2009-07-02 11:08:52 AM  
Speaking of vapid rationalizing, this article is farking gold. It's like the ultimate "I cheated on my husband so everything about marriage is wrong" trainwreck.

 
lukelightning 2009-07-02 11:09:13 AM  
evilgreg: lukelightning: Or Choose Your Own Adventure/

"Do you go into the Champagne Room? Turn to page 37..."

There is no sex on page 37.


I didn't finish turning the page! It doesn't count!

 
kmp1331 2009-07-02 11:29:01 AM  
Pxtl: Speaking of vapid rationalizing, this article is farking gold. It's like the ultimate "I cheated on my husband so everything about marriage is wrong" trainwreck.

I read about half of that and realized the point of it was 'I'm a whore, but hey check out these words I found in the thesaurus today!'

 
Pxtl 2009-07-02 11:32:25 AM  
kmp1331: Pxtl: Speaking of vapid rationalizing, this article is farking gold. It's like the ultimate "I cheated on my husband so everything about marriage is wrong" trainwreck.

I read about half of that and realized the point of it was 'I'm a whore, but hey check out these words I found in the thesaurus today!'


I want to submit it, but I can't come up with a sufficiently hilarious headline.

 
St. Charles In Charge 2009-07-02 11:33:02 AM  
*female* strippers? oh. right then. i'm not getting those 3 months back.

 
GRANDGALACTICINQUISITOR 2009-07-02 11:43:10 AM  
kmp1331: Pxtl: Speaking of vapid rationalizing, this article is farking gold. It's like the ultimate "I cheated on my husband so everything about marriage is wrong" trainwreck.

I read about half of that and realized the point of it was 'I'm a whore, but hey check out these words I found in the thesaurus today!'


and an ugly one at that!
www.torhouse.org

/I hope the husband upgrades to something better

 
Son of Streak 2009-07-02 12:01:32 PM  
blazemongr: Normally you have to write and publish the book before you can strip it.

/ooh, baby, just take that book jacket all the way off already
//i'd love to caress your naked spine
///do you have a happy ending?


You made my morning. Thank you.

Shostie: Is this like a Diablo Cody article or something?

Why? Was she a stripper or something? 'Cause, if so, this is the first that I'm hearing about it!

 
ds394 2009-07-02 12:06:23 PM  
Scoop84: Shut_up_and_fark_me: I got a GED.

Move on, honey. I don't like a dancer who's smarter than me.


...smarter than I... Just remember to complete the sentence:
I don't like a dancer who's smarter than I am...
I don't like a dancer who's smarter than me am...

/not a stripper
//not smarter than you

 
I Like Bread 2009-07-02 12:12:57 PM  
GRANDGALACTICINQUISITOR: /I hope the husband upgrades to something better

It's cool. The husbands who get cheated on usually get the young hot piece of ass the second time around.

 
Wolfmanjames [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 12:15:16 PM  
madmann: Instant Karma: Shut_up_and_fark_me: My name is Tiffani and my dad left when I was two so my mom moved in with a long-distance truck driver who was also an alcoholic and I never finished high school but I got a GED.

I'm EXACTLY who you'd suspect.

So you're more of a Baltic Ave girl than the Marvin Gardens types that frequent FARK?

Sounds more like a Community Chest.

Ba-dum-CHING!


For that remark you should go directly to jail.

 
BubbaWilkins [TotalFark] 2009-07-02 12:23:29 PM  
What Diablo Cody may can look like:

www.shoehunting.com

/Get your hot links.
//Hot Links Right Here!
///ICE....cold....BEER!

 
Al_Ed 2009-07-02 12:35:18 PM  
I danced while in college to try and earn cash but it wasn't as lucrative as I expected. At first I thought it was because I wasn't too keen on getting implants.

Then I thought it was maybe my costumes weren't nice enough. But, hey, we're talking just heels and thongs as a uniform so not much to get wrong!

I mean, I worked the pole like a champ but never really generated the tips I expected.

The only real benefit I got out of it was some nice upper body strength and crazy moves to use on my spouse! Oh, and when I'm at the playground with the kids, they'll say "Daddy, do that thing on the monkey bars where you cross your legs and hang upside down"!

So there's that.

 
sotua 2009-07-02 12:55:17 PM  
Al_Ed: I danced while in college to try and earn cash but it wasn't as lucrative as I expected. At first I thought it was because I wasn't too keen on getting implants.

Then I thought it was maybe my costumes weren't nice enough. But, hey, we're talking just heels and thongs as a uniform so not much to get wrong!

I mean, I worked the pole like a champ but never really generated the tips I expected.

The only real benefit I got out of it was some nice upper body strength and crazy moves to use on my spouse! Oh, and when I'm at the playground with the kids, they'll say "Daddy, do that thing on the monkey bars where you cross your legs and hang upside down"!

So there's that.


You win one internets. Minus the price of my monitor and keyboard, now damaged with coffee.

 
there their theyre 2009-07-02 12:55:19 PM  
Al_Ed: I danced while in college to try and earn cash but it wasn't as lucrative as I expected. At first I thought it was because I wasn't too keen on getting implants.

Then I thought it was maybe my costumes weren't nice enough. But, hey, we're talking just heels and thongs as a uniform so not much to get wrong!

I mean, I worked the pole like a champ but never really generated the tips I expected.

The only real benefit I got out of it was some nice upper body strength and crazy moves to use on my spouse! Oh, and when I'm at the playground with the kids, they'll say "Daddy, do that thing on the monkey bars where you cross your legs and hang upside down"!

So there's that.


Well, there is your problem right there...

 
Wrong_Intentions 2009-07-02 01:07:12 PM  
Pxtl: Speaking of vapid rationalizing, this article is farking gold. It's like the ultimate "I cheated on my husband so everything about marriage is wrong" trainwreck.

Ok, I tried reading that but gave up. Does the author ever come to a point?

 
SherKhan 2009-07-02 01:09:05 PM  
Al_Ed:

"Do that thing on the monkey bars where you cross your legs and hang upside down, Daddy!"

The only flaw and a minor one at that. ++, would guffaw again.

 
Pxtl 2009-07-02 01:14:14 PM  
Wrong_Intentions: Ok, I tried reading that but gave up. Does the author ever come to a point?

Yup. A hilarious one. In the end, she decides that the institution of marriage is utterly flawed and so her solution is:

"If high-revving women are sexually frustrated, let them have some sort of French arrangement where they have two men, the postfeminist model dad building shelves, cooking bouillabaise, and ignoring them in the home, and the occasional fun-loving boyfriend the kids never see. Alternately, if both spouses find life already rather exhausting, never mind chasing around for sex. Long-married husbands and wives should pleasantly agree to be friends, to set the bedroom aglow at night by the mute opening of separate laptops and just be done with it. More than anything, aside from providing insulation from the world at large, that kind of arrangement could be the perfect way to be left alone.

As far as the children are concerned, how about the tribal approach (a natural, according to both primate and human evolution)? Let children between the ages of 1 and 5 be raised in a household of mothers and their female kin. Let the men/husbands/boyfriends come in once or twice a week to build shelves, prepare that bouillabaisse, or provide sex. "

 
Lizard 2009-07-02 01:14:41 PM  
Al_Ed 2009-07-02 12:35:18 PM
I danced while in college to try and earn cash but it wasn't as lucrative as I expected. At first I thought it was because I wasn't too keen on getting implants.

Then I thought it was maybe my costumes weren't nice enough. But, hey, we're talking just heels and thongs as a uniform so not much to get wrong!

I mean, I worked the pole like a champ but never really generated the tips I expected.

The only real benefit I got out of it was some nice upper body strength and crazy moves to use on my spouse! Oh, and when I'm at the playground with the kids, they'll say "Daddy, do that thing on the monkey bars where you cross your legs and hang upside down"!

So there's that.

BRAVO!

 
Skarekrough 2009-07-02 01:21:16 PM  
Yes....the format is contrived.

Unfortunately the notion that the lives of strippers are interesting and an incredible insight into what motivates men is stupid.

The summary for appeal is simple; they're enthusiastic (or fake it well enough), they stay behind in the venue when they leave and they're not the woman they're currently involved with.

That's it.

Move past it.

If Women want the same draw then consider above to be what they're competing with and go from there.

 
lukelightning 2009-07-02 01:35:11 PM  
Al_Ed:
I mean, I worked the pole like a champ but never really generated the tips I expected.


Well there's your problem. You were moving too fast. It's hard to get a bill into a moving target.

Plus if you look like you're enjoying yourself too much they figure you're just up there for the kicks.

 
simpsonfan 2009-07-02 01:36:16 PM  
This thread needs pics.

 
Sir Vanderhoot 2009-07-02 01:38:47 PM  
I ran into a female friend a couple years ago, summer before freshman year of college, I hadn't seen her since sophomore year of high school. We go out for ice cream to catch up, and she pulls out a wad of cash to pay for hers that literally required a rubber band. Not just petty cash, but 20's and 50's.

Turns out she was stripping, her scholarship to Brown left her with 13 grand to make up, so she started stripping ("dancing"). Ended up setting up the place's network as long as she was in there.

I randomly clicked on her Facebook page recently (post-graduation) and saw that she's been hired by Google as a Assoc. Product Manager (fresh out of college with a Bachelor's) in Mountain View.

/I was very much attracted to her back in High School, she was a gymnast

 
Tommy Moo 2009-07-02 01:45:07 PM  
Jodie Sweetin?

 
bicentennialman 2009-07-02 02:13:46 PM  
Pxtl: Wrong_Intentions: Ok, I tried reading that but gave up. Does the author ever come to a point?

Yup. A hilarious one.


A previous article, about how she's no longer interested in sex, makes the whole thing EVEN BETTER.

 
Blogarhythm 2009-07-02 02:29:22 PM  
Pxtl: Speaking of vapid rationalizing, this article is farking gold. It's like the ultimate "I cheated on my husband so everything about marriage is wrong" trainwreck.

Her ex-husband is a musician that's on the road a bunch. I hope he was just as faithful. Uggg. What an article!

 
DaCaptain19 2009-07-02 02:37:27 PM  
Instant Karma 2009-07-02 10:48:41 AM

So you're more of a Baltic Ave girl than the Marvin Gardens types that frequent FARK?

Yeah, but even the rent on Baltic goes up to $450 a pop if you have a hotel.

Think about it....

(Thinking about it)...

I got nothing.

 
Telos 2009-07-02 02:41:15 PM  
bicentennialman: Pxtl: Wrong_Intentions: Ok, I tried reading that but gave up. Does the author ever come to a point?

Yup. A hilarious one.

A previous article, about how she's no longer interested in sex, makes the whole thing EVEN BETTER.



From your link:

"They order an extra-large cheese pizza (sixteen slices). While waiting-and I am not making this up-they settle in on the couch with large twin bags of Doritos. Each chip is dipped first in Philadelphia cream cheese and then in salsa. Cream cheese, salsa. Cream cheese, salsa. Cream cheese, salsa. The Doritos are finished to the last crumb, and then, upon arrival, the pizza as well. For Teri and Pat, this night of a million carbs is, by special agreement, guilt-free. Both feel that it is better than sex."

Yes, I imagine pizza and doritos would be better than sex with someone who must, by now, be the size of a small beached whale.

Even including the salsa...

 
Instant Karma 2009-07-02 02:47:49 PM  
DaCaptain19: Instant Karma 2009-07-02 10:48:41 AM

So you're more of a Baltic Ave girl than the Marvin Gardens types that frequent FARK?

Yeah, but even the rent on Baltic goes up to $450 a pop if you have a hotel.

Think about it....

(Thinking about it)...

I got nothing.


I think you're saying she'd be able to charge more for making some capital improvements. That is not bad considering everyone up to that point had simply walked past her with $200 cash in hand and not stopped.

If you wanna get noticed you have to have some curb appeal ladies.....or something like that.

 
Infernal Wedgie 2009-07-02 02:59:06 PM  
Blogarhythm: Pxtl: Speaking of vapid rationalizing, this article is farking gold. It's like the ultimate "I cheated on my husband so everything about marriage is wrong" trainwreck.

Her ex-husband is a musician that's on the road a bunch. I hope he was just as faithful. Uggg. What an article!


I think a hearty KHITBASH is in order. A verbose biatch is like any other biatch, except she never shuts up. All the more reason to KHITBASH.

/has no tolerance for cheaters

 
frepnog 2009-07-02 03:03:07 PM  
Pxtl: Speaking of vapid rationalizing, this article is farking gold. It's like the ultimate "I cheated on my husband so everything about marriage is wrong" trainwreck.

OK, here is the problem with that article, and why no matter how seemingly appropriate the point of it is, most people are not going to read it all: NO ONE TALKS LIKE THAT. It is a human interest piece, not a god damned college English thesis.


Take this passage, for example.


"However, in this cluttered forest of my 40s, what I cannot authentically reconjure is the ancient dream of brides, even with the Oprah fluffery of weekly "date nights," when gauzy candlelight obscures the messy house, child talk is nixed and silky lingerie donned, so the two of you can look into each other's eyes and feel that "spark" again."

What a bunch of over written bullshiat. Here is a tip, aspiring columnists - WRITE HOW YOU SPEAK.

While I honestly agree with her position about marriage, I personally found that actually reading the entire article was almost unbearable.

 
tricycleracer 2009-07-02 03:17:47 PM  
bicentennialman: Pxtl: Wrong_Intentions: Ok, I tried reading that but gave up. Does the author ever come to a point?

Yup. A hilarious one.

A previous article, about how she's no longer interested in sex, makes the whole thing EVEN BETTER.


Comedy gold. It's like an archeological excavation of her bad life-decisions.

 
Psumek 2009-07-02 03:31:41 PM  
Instant Karma: DaCaptain19: Instant Karma 2009-07-02 10:48:41 AM

So you're more of a Baltic Ave girl than the Marvin Gardens types that frequent FARK?

Yeah, but even the rent on Baltic goes up to $450 a pop if you have a hotel.

Think about it....

(Thinking about it)...

I got nothing.

I think you're saying she'd be able to charge more for making some capital improvements. That is not bad considering everyone up to that point had simply walked past her with $200 cash in hand and not stopped.

If you wanna get noticed you have to have some curb appeal ladies.....or something like that.


So get a boob job?

 
Nuuu 2009-07-02 03:42:14 PM  
sigdiamond2000: And, just to be clear, I'm not saying that there isn't a feminist justification for stripping/working in porn, because there probably is. But as the author states, it's often horribly convoluted and assumes that the men involved are somehow not objectifying/degrading them simply because they are somehow more aware of the nature of the relationship. That assumes a level of nuance that men simply aren't capable of.

I know someone who is, shall we say, "in the business." She's very intelligent and certainly doesn't fit the mold for someone in her line of work. But it never ceases to amaze me, after all she's done and how smart she is, how little she truly understands about the male gender and the nature of our sexuality.


I think the issue isn't whether men think that they're objectifying and degrading women, so much as whether the women are in fact being objectified and degraded.

Its like, imagine if I sold a guy the Brooklyn Bridge for $5,000. The guy eagerly signs the paperwork, throws down five large, and starts laughing his ass off, saying "You farking moron! I would have paid 10 times that much!" Just because he thinks he bent me over a barrel doesn't make it true.

Here, we've got women who are selling, at an absurd price, something that any guy could get for free with some time and effort. Sure, they can think the women are whores and that they're abusing and degrading them, but at the end of the night the guy is still hemorrhaging money like Bear Sterns, for essentially no worthwhile reason. Strippers are like gold farmers in WOW, or the RIAA; making stupid profit selling something that is worth next to nothing. And when you transact business with those people, whose really the one being abused and degraded?

 
dittybopper [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-02 03:45:20 PM  
Nuuu:
Here, we've got women who are selling, at an absurd price, something that any guy could get for free with some time and effort.


Because time and effort don't have any dollar value....

 
Nuuu 2009-07-02 03:51:25 PM  
dittybopper: Because time and effort don't have any dollar value....

If you really think it is more cost-effective, or even within the ballpark of cost-effectiveness, to buy a lap dance rather than get a girl who actually likes you to do the same thing, then . . . well I just wouldn't exactly envy your life.

Failing that, then I reiterate, it is an absurd price for something that is essentially free.

 
Telos 2009-07-02 04:01:48 PM  
Nuuu:
Here, we've got women who are selling, at an absurd price, something that any guy could get for free with some time and effort.


You know, some of us really can't seem to manage it... so far anyway. Still agree that the price is absurd, as you can get an escort for far less money. (Over an hour, anyway...)



Sure, they can think the women are whores and that they're abusing and degrading them, but at the end of the night the guy is still hemorrhaging money like Bear Sterns, for essentially no worthwhile reason. Strippers are like gold farmers in WOW, or the RIAA; making stupid profit selling something that is worth next to nothing. And when you transact business with those people, whose really the one being abused and degraded?


Frankly, neither, both or either. Depends on everyone's perspective going into it. I've gotten a little better at talking to women by hanging out with some of the girls at a local club, so I don't feel like either of us is degrading, objectifying OR taking advantage of the other. On the other hand, if a guy goes in there clueless... yeah, he's going to get taken advantage of.

It's really probably hardest to actually take advantage of the girls though. They know why they are there, and what they are doing. No illusions about it...

 
Instant Karma 2009-07-02 04:02:07 PM  
Psumek: Instant Karma: DaCaptain19: Instant Karma 2009-07-02 10:48:41 AM

So you're more of a Baltic Ave girl than the Marvin Gardens types that frequent FARK?

Yeah, but even the rent on Baltic goes up to $450 a pop if you have a hotel.

Think about it....

(Thinking about it)...

I got nothing.

I think you're saying she'd be able to charge more for making some capital improvements. That is not bad considering everyone up to that point had simply walked past her with $200 cash in hand and not stopped.

If you wanna get noticed you have to have some curb appeal ladies.....or something like that.

So get a boob job?


How vulgar!

I mean keep the lawn nicely trimmed and well watered.

 
dittybopper [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-02 04:12:35 PM  
Nuuu: dittybopper: Because time and effort don't have any dollar value....

If you really think it is more cost-effective, or even within the ballpark of cost-effectiveness, to buy a lap dance rather than get a girl who actually likes you to do the same thing, then . . . well I just wouldn't exactly envy your life.

Failing that, then I reiterate, it is an absurd price for something that is essentially free.


My misunderstanding: I thought we were talking about straight up prostitution.

 
Fluffball 2009-07-02 05:15:58 PM  
Telos: bicentennialman: Pxtl: Wrong_Intentions: Ok, I tried reading that but gave up. Does the author ever come to a point?

Yup. A hilarious one.

A previous article, about how she's no longer interested in sex, makes the whole thing EVEN BETTER.


From your link:

"They order an extra-large cheese pizza (sixteen slices). While waiting-and I am not making this up-they settle in on the couch with large twin bags of Doritos. Each chip is dipped first in Philadelphia cream cheese and then in salsa. Cream cheese, salsa. Cream cheese, salsa. Cream cheese, salsa. The Doritos are finished to the last crumb, and then, upon arrival, the pizza as well. For Teri and Pat, this night of a million carbs is, by special agreement, guilt-free. Both feel that it is better than sex."

Yes, I imagine pizza and doritos would be better than sex with someone who must, by now, be the size of a small beached whale.

Even including the salsa...


Oh she's THAT lady.

Dan Savage hates her guts, it's awesome.

 
Zaea [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-02 05:26:03 PM  
lolwut

 
magical_mystery_meat 2009-07-02 05:30:27 PM  
Sir Vanderhoot: I ran into a female friend a couple years ago, summer before freshman year of college, I hadn't seen her since sophomore year of high school. We go out for ice cream to catch up, and she pulls out a wad of cash to pay for hers that literally required a rubber band. Not just petty cash, but 20's and 50's.

Turns out she was stripping, her scholarship to Brown left her with 13 grand to make up, so she started stripping ("dancing"). Ended up setting up the place's network as long as she was in there.

I randomly clicked on her Facebook page recently (post-graduation) and saw that she's been hired by Google as a Assoc. Product Manager (fresh out of college with a Bachelor's) in Mountain View.

/I was very much attracted to her back in High School, she was a gymnast


Sounds like she really knows how to skin back the pecker.

 
Dr. Poison 2009-07-02 05:58:46 PM  
She looks like the kind of gal a gay guy could go for.

/that's a dude, dude.

 
HST's Dead Carcass 2009-07-02 06:47:36 PM  
Some folks complain about my stories being long winded, but, dayamn, this woman can prattle on for pages about the most inane off-topic subjects.

 
xuanzhiyouxuan 2009-07-02 08:18:18 PM  
xbattlewax: /Worked as a Dj for 10 years in a strip club

This is just further confirmation that fark has at least one representative of every possible point of view and every possible vocation.

 
Erofeev 2009-07-02 08:31:38 PM  
The article makes a good point about a really poisonous attitude within the sex worker industry and outside of it. It's especially bad for the women in the business. There's this hierarchy. You know, it's okay and you're better if you're young and smart and had a normal childhood, it's okay and you're better if you're with an escort service, it's okay and you're better if you don't have a pimp, it's okay and you're better if you're just a stripper ... everyone else is just a farked up, washed up whore. But not you, no.

It must make the business so much harder for women if they don't get to claim superiority in these ways.

 
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