From TFA:

"Maybe offer some sort of counseling for my children, ask me how my children are doing," he said. "I want somebody to ask me the kind of questions my kids are asking me."

So, he wants the school to call and ask him what sex means?

I see no pr0n video attached to the story. Subby lied to me, or I'm blind.

benlonghair: I see no pr0n video attached to the story. Subby lied to me, or I'm blind.

I suspect it will be on RedTube before too long...at least that's what I'm hoping.

The TV news report is in the upper right corner and it cuts to the pixelated video a few times.

PainInTheASP: benlonghair: I see no pr0n video attached to the story. Subby lied to me, or I'm blind.

I suspect it will be on RedTube before too long...at least that's what I'm hoping.

More likely LiveLeak, since apparently it's only like 5 seconds or so.

Also it's hard to tell with the blurring, but it looks more like a solo mission, unless the dude is bald or light-haired, completely inside the blur, and isn't moving much.

benlonghair: I see no pr0n video attached to the story. Subby lied to me, or I'm blind.

Yeah it's there. Upper-right side of the page. Kinda funny, too. Poor parents!

"Look son! There's you and your classmates! Why don't you tell me what was going on in class that d--" *video changes*
"Dad who is that?"
"Uh. Go to your room for a minute, please."

kmramki: "Maybe offer some sort of counseling for my children, ask me how my children are doing," he said. "I want somebody to ask me the kind of questions my kids are asking me."

If your kids are in fifth grade and they claim not to know what sex is, they are lying to you.

kmramki: From TFA:

"Maybe offer some sort of counseling for my children, ask me how my children are doing," he said. "I want somebody to ask me the kind of questions my kids are asking me."

So, he wants the school to call and ask him what sex means?

Article fail.

In the vid, I'd-like-a-payout-dad says, "I want somebody to ask me what kind of questions my kids are asking me."

I'm guessing the answer is "questions about sex". The horror!

Damm..too bad that didn't happen here! My daughter's teacher last year was a little hottie!

'Dad, is that Ms. Delfanti?'


No amount of LOLs can express my laughter.

That shiat NEVER happens to me (or my kids).

Blues_X: Dad, is that Ms. Delfanti?

Sit down kid. I knew this day would come, it's time for "the talk."

You see, when a teacher, pizza delivery boy, a vibrator, and a voyeristic cameraman - whose guttural grunting quite frankly hampered my own masturbatory enjoyment of your "Classroom Mammories" DVD - love each other very-very much.

HOLY PIXELIZATION, BATMAN!

brap: You see, when a teacher, pizza delivery boy, a vibrator, and a voyeristic cameraman - whose guttural grunting quite frankly hampered my own masturbatory enjoyment of your "Classroom Mammories" DVD - love each other very-very much.

But I didn't order any pizza!

This is the teacher in question



I snagged this from her Facebook page. Sorry it's so pixelated but it was small and I had to enlarge it some to make it viewable.

/I'd hit it...

woah. wasn't this episode of Family Guy?

"It's felony stupid, but it's not a crime"

If I had a dollar for every time that was said to me..

If this were a male teacher, he would be in jail.

I am twelve and what is this

omg - they sent it to each child's home? the potential is high here.

SlothB77: woah. wasn't this episode of Family Guy?

I'm pretty sure most everything in life has been covered by either Family Guy or Seinfeld.

"My son's reaction was, 'Dad, is that Ms. Defanti?'"
"We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added.

Oh well, they had to talk about it sooner or later.

/LOL

"It goes from my son, straight to her on the couch," said 'Joe,' who saw the video along with his son and did not wish to be identified. "My son's reaction was, 'Dad, is that Ms. Defanti?'"

"We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added.


"You see, son, the bird holds the video camera while the bee asks 'Is it on now?' Then the bird says 'Yeah, baby, you are so hot!'"...

Clam tacos for all the kids at intermission.

zappaisfrank: This is the teacher in question

I'd pixelate it like the angry fist of God.

myspamhere: If this were a male teacher, he would be in jail.

Well, she has the "I'm an idiot" defense. No one would believe a man could be that bad at using a computer.

blazemongr: "My son's reaction was, 'Dad, is that Ms. Defanti?'"
"We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added.


...and then Dad was up until 1am checking out Ms Defanti!

Nothing says love like a masturbation video.

Dog bless the sexual freaks of this world. I would hug you all, if'n it weren't for the Astroglide making you so slippery.

Hey if I had a kid & he/she came home with it I would still keep it only if it was good quality.

DuttySoldier: Felony Stupid

Should be a new FARK tag.

This. Rocks.

But if I teach a different grade level, then it's ok?

hummmmm, sooo having your class videos in the same folder with your sex tapes is wrong? was she not suppose to do that?


/its hot.. you know it.

Hahahaha!

No shiat she didn't answer the door, ass.

Reporters are stupid.

i like the dad's helpful description:

"it goes from my son to her, on the couch, like this"

"We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added.

Doing the birds and the bees? I heard a story about a guy doing an ostrich once but isn't that a bit advanced for a fifth grader?

Man, all I got from my 5th Grade teacher was the clap...

You know the mom that would go psycho and get the lawyers and D.A. involved? Yeah, that's me. But that's because I hate the sacntimonious, meddling, selective rule enforcing, "zero" tolerance, hypocritical excuse of a public school my kids go to that much.

Its Microsofts fault for that vague "My Videos" folder.

They ought to have a "MY My Videos" folder and a "My Naughty Bits Videos" folder, along with a "My Class Videos Without My Porn" folder.

Much, much less ambiguous.

Link at top: "Woman In Swimsuit Chased, Caught In Sac"

Now that's what I'm talkin' about!

gentfx: Hahahaha!

No shiat she didn't answer the door, ass.

Reporters are stupid.

But that's not how it's done in the movies! Girls always answer the door and then 'they let you in.' It's standard plot!

"We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added.

See, this is what happens when you mix classroom footage with teacher sex footage: Now confused dad is screwing his son.

zappaisfrank: This is the teacher in question



Nice...

im 12 and what is this

Felony Stupid is right. Didn't she know she could make more money by selling that video than just giving it to the kids?

I like how she's trying to market to a younger demographic, but this is kinda silly - those kids won't be making money until they're around 16, and by then she'll be too old to do quality work. She should teach at a high school, now that's a market that needs more porn.

I think we're going to find out the age of question: can you die of embarrassment?

Did the parents pay for the DVD? If so, then it's prostitution.

That would be great to get something like this, I would immediately make a copy, because you never know.

What's wrong with the guy they interviewed? Over react much does he? It can't be that hard to talk to a fifth grader about sex, he should be thankful, this gave him the perfect opportunity to do it.

Anybody have the disk without the pixels?

Sounds like she was messing around with another faculty member and they slipped it in the DVD player as revenge for something.

Man, have the teachers changed since I went to school in the Elk Grove school district.

Moloth: im 12 and what is this

Something that you will be doing in a couple of years. 8oP

/nice pics by the way

How do you put a tape in a DVD player?

I'm surprised the puritans aren't calling for her firing. We can't have a teacher who HAS SEX!! OMG! Think of the children!!!

not normally a violent man, but would like to give the 5 finger death punch to that reporter

/its the name of some band i guess
//promised myself i would find a way to use the phrase at some point today
///*BING

blazemongr: CrazyCracka420: So that's what sex looks like?



From the POV of the participant, and if you're doing it right, yes.

umm no thats what prison sex looks like
\with the lights out
\\no experience just heard about it
\\\teacher be hot though
\\\\want to touch the hinney

<i>"We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added</i>.

A kids worst nightmare, THE SIX HOUR SEX TALK.

Moloth: im 12 and what is this

Your website says you are 30, which makes you old.

"Daddy? What's that?"

"That's going in Daddy's collection."

FTA:

"We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added."

Shouldn't he have been explaining the "birds and bees" rather than doing them with his son?

FTFA: "We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added.

Poor choice of words there. Sounds uneducated AND filthy.

Why do people video themselves doing anything sexual (without getting paid for it)? Are they so egocentric that they think everything they do, including grunting and making the O-face, is so awesome that it must be preserved, like you'd preserve a painting or the original copy of the Declaration of Independence?

Having said that, homemade porn+monumental stupid IS entertaining for the rest of us.

She looks pretty hot. I'm hot for teacher...

....but then my home work was never quite like this...

Accident my ASS!

/F's as perverted as M's.

Mmm. 5th grade. Madison Elementary, Arlington, VA. 1966. Mrs. Armstrong, with the beehive hairdo and gorgeous knockers.

Kids, it's called imagnation. It's what we had before teh Internets.

(Sorry, imagination.)

If the dad was smart he'd say...how much for me not to upload this for the entire world to see? Then she doesn't have the money so she has to pay in other ways.

Then the process starts all over again.

Barnstormer: Link at top: "Woman In Swimsuit Chased, Caught In Sac"

Now that's what I'm talkin' about!

If you saw the woman in question, you'd put her back in her Chevrolet Tracker and send her on her way, blown front tires and all.

/I'm not saying "Do Not Want" here, but unless you like middle-aged crazy topped with a Jaromir Jagr mullet circa 1993 well, it may not turn your crank.

So this bird saw this bee and thought, I like to stick my dick in that pooper. But the bee, having a stinger on its pooper, stung the bird right there in the pecker. The bird said OMG I hate you and started hitting the bee over the head.

And that's how babby's are formed.

kliq: If the dad was smart he'd say...how much for me not to upload this for the entire world to see? Then she doesn't have the money so she has to pay in other ways.

Then the process starts all over again.

Hmmm another good plot. Chances are, she just let that video 'slip out' so she'd get a bunch of horny dads wanting to sex her. She's obviously addicted to sex, and this video was a cry for MOAR.

Ant: We can't have a teacher who HAS SEX!! OMG! Think of on a DVD and gives it to the children!!!

/FTFM

StrikitRich: "Daddy? What's that?"

"That's going in Daddy's collection."

I mean seriously. If you watch the video of the "outraged" parent, he's such a douchbag. He probably spanked to it 3 times before he found the mock moral outrage to go on TV and scream about how horrible it is. Its pathetic.

MBooda: Mmm. 5th grade. Madison Elementary, Arlington, VA. 1966. Mrs. Armstrong, with the beehive hairdo and gorgeous knockers.

Kids, it's called imagnation. It's what we had before teh Internets.

Fourth grade, Wall Elementary School, Sturgis, Michigan, 1974. Mrs. Lipps with a shag hairdo and super tight skirts, and she was fond of bending over the pick things up. She was also a raving biatch but smokin' hot!

Memories..pressed between the pages....(which are now stuck together!)

Got the birds and the bees talk while doing yard work...but no mention of birds or bees. My dad straight talked me, complete with the scientific names for things and a fair bit of humor. I'm the only person I know that wasn't somehow traumatized by it.

I.Have.A.Ham.Radio: not normally a violent man, but would like to give the 5 finger death punch to that reporter


Pretty much this. It was everything I hate about local news.

-Troy McClure-ish knock on the front door, complete w/ turnaround to the camera: "Now Channel 13 was not able to get in touch with the pervert in question..." - CHECK

-Cutaway to "what a DVD might look like" b-roll footage - CHECK

-Naked footage of teacher - FAIL

DuttySoldier: Felony Stupid

This is the single greatest new farkism of this year...

This is why you just don't video tape certain things!

Like politicians who should always assume they have a microphone on them. Average people should always assume any tape they make will end up in the hands of others.

That teacher has effectively destroyed her own career...amazing

The next time you think, "Oh my god, what have I just done," when you mistakenly reply-all to some work email, think about this woman. Then you'll feel better.

/unless you replied-all with a porn of yourself

I see no sex in that video. Where is it?

Donnie's pants are tight!


/hot like Maya

zappaisfrank: This is the teacher in question



I snagged this from her Facebook page. Sorry it's so pixelated but it was small and I had to enlarge it some to make it viewable.

That's what she said about her man.



I'll be in my bunk.

Ant: I'm surprised the puritans aren't calling for her firing. We can't have a teacher who HAS SEX!! OMG! Think of the children!!!

My school TOTALLY had this attitude - no teachers can have sex - ever!!

//of course, they were all nuns and beyond fugly...

How many male students, fathers and fathers' friends whacked it to this video, or pictured her during regular sex with their others?

I bet A LOT.

I bet some fathers and kids found the video in the trashbag and pulled it out to save it.

What a DVD might look like:

gorgor: So this bird saw this bee and thought, I like to stick my dick in that pooper. But the bee, having a stinger on its pooper, stung the bird right there in the pecker. The bird said OMG I hate you and started hitting the bee over the head.

And that's how babby's are formed.

gorgor, no pics to illustrate this tale (tail)?

//shrugs
///waits.....

On a side note, I'd like to get 'behind the scenes with Begnaud'. He's a lil' HOTTIE.

Aaaannnnd....ACTION!

RockyMtnMan: This is why you just don't video tape certain things!

Like politicians who should always assume they have a microphone on them. Average people should always assume any tape they make will end up in the hands of others.

That teacher has effectively destroyed her own started a whole new career...amazing

FTFY

Got to hand it to the CBS editing crew....

"Do we add parts of the her porn video to the newstory?"

"Oh hell yea!"

"So....Once, twice, three times?"

"Go with three, four makes us look slutty, and we'll get less viewers of the story only showing her orgasmic face twice..."

Its not news, its CBS's highly pixalated mastabatorium!

"and for the rest of the night my son pretended he was learning something from me while 'innocently' tossing questions out just to see me squirm, so he could tell his friends later"

So hot. Want to touch the heiny.

And this was the finsihed product.

/ can't wait for the 'bloopers' version

blazemongr: DuttySoldier: Felony Stupid

Should be a new FARK tag.

Agreed, c'mon FARK make it happen!

So much lulz, so little time.

Proofreading, it's not just for text anymore.

dumbass, but definitely not worth her loosing her job, even if she was fugly (which it appears she was not).

I don't think we're talking about love here. We are talking about S-E-X in front of the C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N!

Ms. Delfanti... where were you when I was in 5th grade?

What Ms. Delfanti having sex on a couch may look like:

From TFA "...the woman is a good teacher, but just made a mistake that may become the most embarrassing moment of their life."

To ensure that this is the case, they repeatedly show her O face in a video clip...nice.

overlord: What Ms. Delfanti having sex on a couch may look like:

The Crane Kick?

wow... i feel so much better about myself.
she should kill herself... run as fast as
she can towards the edge of a cliff.
that video is great... 'son, thats what a
sexually repressed woman looks like when she
gets a video camera for hanukkah and wants to
get hot by watching herself masterbate because
she's a lesbian and her parts turn herself on'

dennysgod: Proofreading, it's not just for text anymore.

dumbass, but definitely not worth her loosing her job, even if she was fugly (which it appears she was not).

Apparently her job isn't all that's loose.

/wait, what?

If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times: it is safe to assume that every single photo, recording, video, or other record you make of anything you do will end up public at some point in the future. The reasons for this could range from someone else's malice to one's own stupidity, but it really doesn't matter: it will get there, and it will stay there, and you cannot stop it: there will always be at least one copythat, for whatever reason, you do not control.

If this makes you uncomfortable, or would cause problems in the future, turn off the damn camera.

RockyMtnMan: This is why you just don't video tape certain things!

Like politicians who should always assume they have a microphone on them. Average people should always assume any tape they make will end up in the hands of others.

That teacher has effectively destroyed her own career...amazing

Behold! the awesome power of the internet!

I'm thinking there is a typo in the article...

Should read... The person in the video turned out to be Isabelle Jackson, NOT Elementary fifth grade teacher Crystal Defanti.

Otherwise, I think she would have recieved walking papers already.

Maybe???

Millennium: If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times: it is safe to assume that every single photo, recording, video, or other record you make of anything you do will end up public at some point in the future. The reasons for this could range from someone else's malice to one's own stupidity, but it really doesn't matter: it will get there, and it will stay there, and you cannot stop it: there will always be at least one copythat, for whatever reason, you do not control.

If this makes you uncomfortable, or would cause problems in the future, turn off the damn camera.

What about webcam sex? Are the hackers recording it and making $$ with it?

Rivethead: <i>"We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added</i>.

A kids worst nightmare, THE SIX HOUR SEX TALK.

Once they are flying around the house they are really hard to catch so I can understand the Six Hour part. Chased a pair of Tits for the better part of a weekend once.

"Joe" didn't keep the DVD, he sold it to the reporters.

brothajahn: wow... i feel so much better about myself.
she should kill herself... run as fast as
she can towards the edge of a cliff.
that video is great... 'son, thats what a
sexually repressed woman looks like when she
gets a video camera for hanukkah and wants to
get hot by watching herself masterbate because
she's a lesbian and her parts turn herself on'

jeez, you paying for your internet connection based on browser window width or was that just a really crappy poem?

I bet the full vid is on 4chan. Someone go check and come back and let us know.

My son will be a fifth grader next year... maybe she'll want to change jobs and move to a small rural community in Kansas to hide her shame at this incident... maybe it'll be my small rural community in Kansas... hey I can dream!

myspamhere: If this were a male teacher, he would be in jail.

This!!

OldRod: My son will be a fifth grader next year... maybe she'll want to change jobs and move to a small rural community in Kansas to hide her shame at this incident... maybe it'll be my small rural community in Kansas... hey I can dream!

and ... yet another plotline! this is easy!

hollywood, are you paying attention? you need new ideas.

just take some of these ideas, and tone down the x-rated bits, and you've got a couple of blockbusters

Why are you hiding, "Joe"?

NikkiPoooo: "Joe" didn't keep the DVD, he sold it to the reporters.

You can bet he kept an "archive copy" just in case :)

When I was in fifth grade, the topic depicted in the video was part of the curriculum. Perhaps the teacher should be applauded for her creativity in moving the class through an awkward topic. Above and beyond the call of duty!

And I agree with AvgMerican, it's embarrassingly worse because of their story. Mountain, molehill, stupid father... he's the jackass.

It deserves repeating that if that was a male teacher on that dvd, he would be in jail right now...

No, seriously. WTF? Are we all watching different videos or something? There literally was no sex at all in the video I saw.

YannickNoahsFark: gorgor, no pics to illustrate this tale (tail)?

http://tinyurl.com/lz2hxk
(copy and paste)

I'm 12 11 and what is this

/unless you got held back

bookmarking this page with the hopes of a link to the video being posted soon!

olapbill: brothajahn: wow... i feel so much better about myself.
she should kill herself... run as fast as
she can towards the edge of a cliff.
that video is great... 'son, thats what a
sexually repressed woman looks like when she
gets a video camera for hanukkah and wants to
get hot by watching herself masterbate because
she's a lesbian and her parts turn herself on'

jeez, you paying for your internet connection based on browser window width or was that just a really crappy poem?

once you define a structured set of words as a poem,
it ceases to be one. and defining the edge of a post
by hitting return at the end of a line is like auto
autoerotic asphyxiation, which im sure you're into.

I think this teacher should be punished but not fired.

I think proper punishment should be to have the video all over the internet. If that's not a suitable punishment, she could come to my house and we could tailor something for her more personally.

OK, found the real one. Looks like she's flicking the bean.

RockyMtnMan: This is why you just don't video tape certain things!



I remember a few years back there was a story about some hoodlums who broke into a home to rape and steal while raping a female resident they were also video taping it. They later tried to claim it was consensual but the tape said differently. What the teacher did was bad, but worse is taping yourself while committing a crime where you're creating evidence to be used against you. A better story is the lady who while visiting her boyfriend, found a video tape and proceed to watch it, finding that it had him in a three some with his ex-wife and their 12 year old daughter. Girl-friend called the cops on his ass.

brothajahn: olapbill: brothajahn: wow... i feel so much better about myself.
she should kill herself... run as fast as
she can towards the edge of a cliff.
that video is great... 'son, thats what a
sexually repressed woman looks like when she
gets a video camera for hanukkah and wants to
get hot by watching herself masterbate because
she's a lesbian and her parts turn herself on'

jeez, you paying for your internet connection based on browser window width or was that just a really crappy poem?

once you define a structured set of words as a poem,
it ceases to be one. and defining the edge of a post
by hitting return at the end of a line is like auto
autoerotic asphyxiation, which im sure you're into.

auto autoerotic asphyxiation? Is that in TF3 when Optimus puts an arm bar on Bumblebee from behind while massaging his tailpipe?

Ant: OK, found the real one. Looks like she's flicking the bean.

Calling BS without a link

museamused: dennysgod: Proofreading, it's not just for text anymore.

dumbass, but definitely not worth her loosing her job, even if she was fugly (which it appears she was not).

Apparently her job isn't all that's loose.

/wait, what?

ba dum tssshhhh

/as you can see my proofreading skills leave a lot to be desired.

So none of you useless assholes have come up with a link for the unpixelated video yet?

I'm embarrassed to call you friends.

brothajahn: olapbill: brothajahn: wow... i feel so much better about myself.
she should kill herself... run as fast as
she can towards the edge of a cliff.
that video is great... 'son, thats what a
sexually repressed woman looks like when she
gets a video camera for hanukkah and wants to
get hot by watching herself masterbate because
she's a lesbian and her parts turn herself on'

jeez, you paying for your internet connection based on browser window width or was that just a really crappy poem?

once you define a structured set of words as a poem,
it ceases to be one. and defining the edge of a post
by hitting return at the end of a line is like auto
autoerotic asphyxiation, which im sure you're into.

LOL WUT?

Well if this is wrong I don't want to be right. I guess I'll have to call of my students for the last 10 years.

olapbill

How you doin'? Haven't seen you around lately.

brothajahn: olapbill: brothajahn: wow... i feel so much better about myself.
she should kill herself... run as fast as
she can towards the edge of a cliff.
that video is great... 'son, thats what a
sexually repressed woman looks like when she
gets a video camera for hanukkah and wants to
get hot by watching herself masterbate because
she's a lesbian and her parts turn herself on'

jeez, you paying for your internet connection based on browser window width or was that just a really crappy poem?

once you define a structured set of words as a poem,
it ceases to be one. and defining the edge of a post
by hitting return at the end of a line is like auto
autoerotic asphyxiation, which im sure you're into.

Woman... woe-man... whoooa-man. She was a thief, you gotta believe, she stole my heart and my cat. Betty, Judy, Josie and those hot Pussycats... they make me horny, Saturday morny... girls of cartoo-ins will leave me in ruins... I want to to be Betty's Barney. Hey Jane... get me off this crazy thing... called love.

gorgor: So this bird saw this bee and thought, I like to stick my dick in that pooper. But the bee, having a stinger on its pooper, stung the bird right there in the pecker. The bird said OMG I hate you and started hitting the bee over the head.

And that's how babby's are formed.

I don't get Fark's fascination with buttsecks. There is this thing called the vagina. The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his Johnson.

olapbill: brothajahn: olapbill: brothajahn: wow... i feel so much better about myself.
she should kill herself... run as fast as
she can towards the edge of a cliff.
that video is great... 'son, thats what a
sexually repressed woman looks like when she
gets a video camera for hanukkah and wants to
get hot by watching herself masterbate because
she's a lesbian and her parts turn herself on'

jeez, you paying for your internet connection based on browser window width or was that just a really crappy poem?

once you define a structured set of words as a poem,
it ceases to be one. and defining the edge of a post
by hitting return at the end of a line is like auto
autoerotic asphyxiation, which im sure you're into.

auto autoerotic asphyxiation? Is that in TF3 when Optimus puts an arm bar on Bumblebee from behind while massaging his tailpipe?

Sexual objectification of fictitious alien robotics
is a questionable pastime. I saw TF3, and while you
were massaging your tailpipe with your dick beaters
i wouldve been more entertained by a school teacher
educating me about proper clitoral stimulation while
i blogged about it in tight square paragraphical form.

"Maybe offer some sort of counseling for my children, ask me how my children are doing," he said.

Which part of being a parent don't you understand? Asshole.

Spike Lee's Favorite Farker: I don't get Fark's fascination with buttsecks. There is this thing called the vagina. The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his Johnson.

You sound fat.

jokertrm: Ant: OK, found the real one. Looks like she's flicking the bean.

Calling BS without a link

Same here.

Spike Lee's Favorite Farker: The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his Johnson.

Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey.

Spike Lee's Favorite Farker:

I don't get Fark's fascination with buttsecks. There is this thing called the vagina. The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his Johnson.

I personally like to call mine by his sir name "Shamoo." As for the women's bits I like to call them by the scientific name "vulva" as that is most appropriate. The vagina is a part of the vulva.

"It's felony stupid, but it's not a crime," said defense expert Ken Rosenfeld. "Is it something that she should be disciplined for? Absolutely, but fired for? She didn't intend for this to happen."

Common sense? Unpossible.

She looks Japanese.

geekluv: olapbill

How you doin'? Haven't seen you around lately.

Hey geekluv
I've been loitering. how you doin'? And I mean that in the Joey way of course...;)

What's the big deal? It's all pixelated anyway, pfft, like the kids could make anything out of that...



That isn't even NSFW material.

Spike Lee's Favorite Farker:

I don't get Fark's fascination with buttsecks. There is this thing called the vagina. The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his Johnson.

You mean coitus?

Kalashinator: Donnie's pants are tight!

Chicken pot chicken pot chicken pot piiiie.

Inviolable rule of Nekkid Pictures #1:

Somebody other than the person you intended to see them, WILL see them. Period, world without end, Amen. If you're not prepared for that inevitability, DON'T TAKE THE DAMN THINGS.

olapbill: geekluv: olapbill

How you doin'? Haven't seen you around lately.

Hey geekluv
I've been loitering. how you doin'? And I mean that in the Joey way of course...;)

I'm fine. contact me sometime!

LesserEvil: What's the big deal? It's all pixelated anyway, pfft, like the kids could make anything out of that...



That isn't even NSFW material.

pixelated is the new way to film porn movies.

Um, Miss Mitsuka... could you put some clothes on?

/obscure?
//warui?

gorgor: YannickNoahsFark: gorgor, no pics to illustrate this tale (tail)?

http://tinyurl.com/lz2hxk
(copy and paste)


you always deliver....

Spike Lee's Favorite Farker: gorgor: So this bird saw this bee and thought, I like to stick my dick in that pooper. But the bee, having a stinger on its pooper, stung the bird right there in the pecker. The bird said OMG I hate you and started hitting the bee over the head.

And that's how babby's are formed.

I don't get Fark's fascination with buttsecks. There is this thing called the vagina. The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his Johnson.



Well, that's just like your opinion, man.

Yet another shining example of why Fark badly needs a [Sacramento] tag.

guvnor: Yet another shining example of why Fark badly needs a [Sacramento] tag.

Totally agree.

Here is a link to a better version of the first news report - has the ability to enbiggen

Link (new window)


/Bring on the Big Blurry Beaver!

Count me amongst the voices decrying a male/female double standard here.

Does this mean I should swear off sending BIE?

Wrong_Intentions: Count me amongst the voices decrying a male/female double standard here.

If they didn't allow for women to put out sex tapes now and then, and then when they come out to let them slide by with a slap on the wrist, then AA programs wouldn't be working as intended.

Only a matter of time before the full unedited version hits.

playdate: Does this mean I should swear off sending BIE?

Well, as a lawyer, I think I'd have to reviw the pics before making a recommendation. EIP

Wrong_Intentions: Count me amongst the voices decrying a male/female double standard here.

so you think she should be arrested?

dennysgod: Proofreading, it's not just for text anymore.

dumbass, but definitely not worth her loosing her job, even if she was fugly (which it appears she was not).

Maybe not losing her job, but maybe a job change to principal's secretary.

IncubatorJones: Wrong_Intentions: Count me amongst the voices decrying a male/female double standard here.

so you think she should be arrested?

No, but I think she should be investigated by the police, branded a pervert by society, and quietly "resign" as would happen were the genders reversed.

antron: I am twelve and what is this

Well, That is a Vajajay and if you ever see one,
run home and cry then punch yourself in the sack until you pass out.
Oh and stop touching yourself, You will go blind, and it kills kittens and stuff...

playdate: Does this mean I should swear off sending BIE?

If anything, it means you should send more!

Beeblebrox: brothajahn: olapbill: brothajahn: wow... i feel so much better about myself.
she should kill herself... run as fast as
she can towards the edge of a cliff.
that video is great... 'son, thats what a
sexually repressed woman looks like when she
gets a video camera for hanukkah and wants to
get hot by watching herself masterbate because
she's a lesbian and her parts turn herself on'

jeez, you paying for your internet connection based on browser window width or was that just a really crappy poem?

once you define a structured set of words as a poem,
it ceases to be one. and defining the edge of a post
by hitting return at the end of a line is like auto
autoerotic asphyxiation, which im sure you're into.

Woman... woe-man... whoooa-man. She was a thief, you gotta believe, she stole my heart and my cat. Betty, Judy, Josie and those hot Pussycats... they make me horny, Saturday morny... girls of cartoo-ins will leave me in ruins... I want to to be Betty's Barney. Hey Jane... get me off this crazy thing... called love.


Noice!

/Hot.

Cross of Iron: jokertrm: Ant: OK, found the real one. Looks like she's flicking the bean.

Calling BS without a link

Same here.

No, I didn't find THE video. I found the one you're all talking about. They have a couple different versions on that news website

Scoop84: playdate: Does this mean I should swear off sending BIE?

Well, as a lawyer, I think I'd have to reviw the pics before making a recommendation. EIP

Uhhh, I concur.

in the clip of the naughty vid they show in the newscast clip,
it looks like there isn't much movement going on... [the pixels don't help] ... maybe there, in that 5 second clip at least, isn't really sex going on, but something "less hardcore" than sex like rug munching or getting off or something.

still, it was hot.

the anchor at the end says there will be a new dvd will be given to the students.

where can i get a copy of the newer, hotter version?

/i love the summer sequels

PfizerX: Scoop84: playdate: Does this mean I should swear off sending BIE?

Well, as a lawyer, I think I'd have to reviw the pics before making a recommendation. EIP

Uhhh, I concur.

Thirded. How many does it take to get a quorum around here, anyway?

_/EIP

If this had been a male teacher, he would have already lost his job and been arrested.

...and you know it's true.

Well at least the kid won't have to go on Yahoo answers and ask How is babby formed?

did anyone check out the mug shot gallery link on that page? There's some REAL winners in there
http://cbs13.com/slideshows/mug.shots.crime.20.913564.html

Wait, masturbation is sex? So I WASN'T a virgin all those years! FARK YEAR WHAT A RELIEF

I'll be back for the NSFW link of said video.

*fappity*

elev8meL8r: PfizerX: Scoop84: playdate: Does this mean I should swear off sending BIE?

Well, as a lawyer, I think I'd have to reviw the pics before making a recommendation. EIP

Uhhh, I concur.

Thirded. How many does it take to get a quorum around here, anyway?

/EIP

Fourthed. Hey, it's worth a shot.

/or maybe even two...

theorellior: So much lulz, so little time.

Perfectly summarized. That poor woman, but holy crap is this funny.

So, where are the links? I can't find em.

From TFA: "We were up till midnight doing the 'birds and the bees,'" he added.

Ummm, I think you are doing it wrong.

The only thing I saw was some gay douche bag talking about his clothes and management and lawyers.

Aside from anything else in the story, this woman is clearly too goddamn stupid to be a teacher. Fire her.

Rug Doctor: Aside from anything else in the story, this woman is clearly too goddamn stupid to be a teacher. Fire her.

Or maybe she's teaching the wrong class? You can't deny she taught the kids something!

Kalashinator: /hot like Maya

??? WTF... you need to get out more often.

/yuck

LesserEvil: What's the big deal? It's all pixelated anyway, pfft, like the kids could make anything out of that...



That isn't even NSFW material.

After concerned Daddy is done dealing with his kid's "trauma" he can explain why he's on TV spreading his legs describing a sex act.

blazemongr: myspamhere: If this were a male teacher, he would be in jail.

Well, she has the "I'm an idiot" defense. No one would believe a man could be that bad at using a computer.

LOL. Granted women are generally not very tech-savvy, but I have run into an incredible amount of men that haven't the slightest idea of what they are doing with their computer, TV, or stereo, you name it. Scarier still is that some of them have jobs doing tech support.

So how is a DVD a sex "tape"?

feanturi: blazemongr: myspamhere: If this were a male teacher, he would be in jail.

Well, she has the "I'm an idiot" defense. No one would believe a man could be that bad at using a computer.

LOL. Granted women are generally not very tech-savvy, but I have run into an incredible amount of men that haven't the slightest idea of what they are doing with their computer, TV, or stereo, you name it. Scarier still is that some of them have jobs doing tech support.


Agreed. If it was a male teacher he would be in jail, and no amount of 'hysterical' crying on the phone would move these parents.
I'd also wager that if this teacher was unmarried or unattractive, she would be in a lot more trouble.

It's a mystery to me how anyone, man or woman, could make all these copies without viewing the DVD even once...

dennysgod 2009-07-02 12:02:11 PM

Proofreading, it's not just for text anymore.

dumbass, but definitely not worth her loosing her job, even if she was fugly (which it appears she was not).

Let me tell you how unintentionally ironic your post is.

DaCaptain19: dennysgod 2009-07-02 12:02:11 PM

Proofreading, it's not just for text anymore.

dumbass, but definitely not worth her loosing her job, even if she was fugly (which it appears she was not).

Let me tell you how unintentionally ironic your post is.

I LOL'd

Where's the torrent dammit?!?!

l Ron Hubbub
So how is a DVD a sex "tape"?

is it a sex "disc" ? lol


// heh heh "sex dick" heh heh

obtanium666: Kalashinator: /hot like Maya

??? WTF... you need to get out more often.

/yuck

Dude, have you seen her breasticles? They're bigger than my head. I'd be a motorboating sonofabiatch if I ever got within 5 feet of her.

theoriginalslash: Why do people video themselves doing anything sexual (without getting paid for it)? Are they so egocentric that they think everything they do, including grunting and making the O-face, is so awesome that it must be preserved, like you'd preserve a painting or the original copy of the Declaration of Independence?

There are plenty of reasons for making homemade porn. Here are just a few:

1. If your partner isn't around, homemade porn is a wonderful masturbation aid.
2. It's a way of preserving memories of the couple doing something they (presumably) both really enjoy doing.
3. Watching your homemade porn with your partner is a tremendous turn on and can lead to further experimentation.
4. You have something to blackmail your partner with if they ever break up with you (just kidding).

Certainly, it's not for everyone. If the couple doesn't have a committed, trusting relationship, it's probably a bad idea. If the person holding the DVD (or other storage device) isn't good about keeping their possessions safe and secure, then it's probably a bad idea. If the recording is of some kind of sexual act that one doesn't want discovered, then it's really a bad idea.

That said, I think homemade porn is wonderful. My wife and I have been making our own porn for a while. I have a "Best of..." DVD kept in my safe at home and the originals are on DVDs that are stored in a safe deposit box.

And yes, I think it's absolutely awesome (my wife moreso than me, but I'm not that bad either) and I don't care if anyone thinks it's egocentric. If you don't think you look good when you're having sex and you don't think that it's enjoyable to watch, chances are that you're not having very good sex. It's supposed to be beautiful and fun - why wouldn't anyone want to watch themselves having sex?

I keep all of our sex recordings very secure, but even if someone got ahold of it, so what? We're not doing anything illegal or immoral - in fact, we're doing something husbands and wives are expected to do (YMMV).

That said, what the teacher did was quite stupid and irresponsible. And she's paying the price now. I feel a little sorry for her.

Oh please. Today's 5th graders have probably seen much more porn than yesterday's high schoolers. Once the parents' backs are turned, they go online and look for whatever slips past NetNanny's filters.

The parents are just upset because in their day they had to make due with dirty magazines.

Lurkerbunny: Oh please. Today's 5th graders have probably seen much more porn than yesterday's high schoolers. Once the parents' backs are turned, they go online and look for whatever slips past NetNanny's filters.

The parents are just upset because in their day they had to make due with dirty magazines.

Can hardly blame 'em. All those memories of having to bribe a hobo with a $10 bill, telling him he could keep the change if he bought me a Penthouse - and just hoping he didn't run off with the $10 outright? Jeez, we had to work for it.

PfizerX: obtanium666: Kalashinator: /hot like Maya

??? WTF... you need to get out more often.

/yuck

Dude, have you seen her breasticles? They're bigger than my head. I'd be a motorboating sonofabiatch if I ever got within 5 feet of her.

Pics, etc.

A Sex Tape?

What is "tape"?

PfizerX: obtanium666: Kalashinator: /hot like Maya

??? WTF... you need to get out more often.

/yuck

Dude, have you seen her breasticles? They're bigger than my head. I'd be a motorboating sonofabiatch if I ever got within 5 feet of her.

Yes. THIS. Very much THIS. Laura San Giacomo has melons that make me wish I were David Spade accidentally wandering into her dressing room on the set of "Just Shoot Me"... And dude, I'd NEVER want to be David Spade.

Maya(Laura San Giacomo) from Just Shoot Me.

Here is a link for, uh, reference : Link (new window)

SFW - unless your boss is a d!ck & doesn't appreciate the majesty of a (covered) zeppelin race while said bazookas undulate wildly in a contest neither can win. Cheers!

Atomic Spunk: That said, I think homemade porn is wonderful. My wife and I have been making our own porn for a while. I have a "Best of..." DVD kept in my safe at home and the originals are on DVDs that are stored in a safe deposit box.

You're a real hit at the bank's office Christmas party, you know.

Yo' teacher's like a field trip, the whole class lines up and gets to come.

//must be a lot of teacher sex to be on the class memory DVD

How has no one found her facebook yet?

Sorry zappaisfrank...

http://www.egusd.net/Jackson/staff.html (new window)

c­de­f­a­ntidsuge­net

"HAY MS. DEFANTI ITZ BOBBY (there must be a bobby in her class right? Too old school? Should I try DeBobCushawntrelle?), I HERD U LIEK MUDKIPZ, NEWAYZ CAN I HAZ NEW COPY OF TEH DVD VIDEOZ YUO MADE 4 UZ? MY DAD TOOK TEH OTHER COPY INTO HIZ DEN AND WE HAVNT SEEN HIM 4 DAYZ!/1 RITEBACKSOONKAMIRITE?@"

playdate: Does this mean I should swear off sending BIE?

Never ever ever think that!

/EIP for BIE
//Bwahahahaaaa like I stand a chance in hell
///Second time today I've gotten to use these slashies

Come on internet, you know one dad had to make a copy of this! Find that man!

SFlaxx: antron: I am twelve and what is this

Well, That is a Vajajay and if you ever see one,
run home and cry then punch yourself in the sack until you pass out.
Oh and stop touching yourself, You will go blind, and it kills kittens and stuff...

Jamrock: what is this

Pimple: Moloth: im 12 and what is this

Your website says you are 30, which makes you old.

geekluv: Moloth: im 12 and what is this

Something that you will be doing in a couple of years. 8oP

/nice pics by the way

It's a 4chan meme and shame on you all for not getting it.