Gulper Eel: Well, it's a well known fact, Sonny Jim, that there's a secret society of the five wealthiest people in the world, known as The Pentavirate, who run everything in the world, including the newspapers, and meet tri-annually at a secret country mansion in Colorado, known as The Meadows.

/tets-up

What is this "newspaper" thing you speak of? Please provide a link. Also, only my Mother calls me Jim, I prefer James. Thanks

Yeah...The Family are a bunch of religious nutbags with very few redeeming features...
...and while she left the Jebus fundies behind, I merely wish to present ONE thing that The Family produced:



/hot like Taiwan summer

Goddamn it!

HOT LIKE TAIWAN SUMMER!

Liv Lo (new window)

tatum: Yeah...The Family are a bunch of religious nutbags with very few redeeming features...
...and while she left the Jebus fundies behind, I merely wish to present ONE thing that The Family produced:



/hot like Taiwan summer

tatum: Goddamn it!

HOT LIKE TAIWAN SUMMER!

Liv Lo (new window)

God, please forgive those that know not that they fail, twice. For an image to be hot it must be an image, and not a link. Is not every link a hot link? Amen.

HowDareYouCallMeAHoser: What is this "newspaper" thing you speak of? Please provide a link. Also, only my Mother calls me Jim, I prefer James. Thanks

Scoff now, but the Colonel puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes ye crave it fortnightly...SMARTASS.

Just like any other form of Christianity, remember when Jesus "forgives" Satan laughs, the more the merrier.

Hobodeluxe: Remember when the economic crisis kicked into high gear and a bunch of them went up to Wall st. and prayed to the golden bull in front of Merrill Lynch?

Wow...

Gulper Eel: the Colonel puts an addictive chemical in his chicken

salt?

Hobodeluxe: Remember when the economic crisis kicked into high gear and a bunch of them went up to Wall st. and prayed to the golden bull in front of Merrill Lynch?

The Christian Right, is neither Christian or right. Discuss...

Very weird... people can be persuaded into believing any old bullshiat if it feeds their egos, I suppose.

keylock71: Very weird... people can be persuaded into believing any old bullshiat if it feeds their egos, I suppose.

This is the excellent foppery of the world: that when we are sick in fortune - often the surfeits of our own behavior - we make guilty of our disasters the sun, the moon, and stars, as if we were villains on necessity, fools by heavenly compulsion, knaves, thieves, and treachers by spherical predominance, drunkards, liars, and adulterers by an enforced obedience of planetary influence. An admirable evasion of whoremaster man, to lay his goatish disposition on the charge of a star!

Hahahaha

You can make that stupid book mean anything you want it to, and there's never a shortage of dupes around.

I sure hope they are not related to this cult (new window)

Gulper Eel: keylock71: Very weird... people can be persuaded into believing any old bullshiat if it feeds their egos, I suppose.

This is the excellent foppery of the world: that when we are sick in fortune - often the surfeits of our own behavior - we make guilty of our disasters the sun, the moon, and stars, as if we were villains on necessity, fools by heavenly compulsion, knaves, thieves, and treachers by spherical predominance, drunkards, liars, and adulterers by an enforced obedience of planetary influence. An admirable evasion of whoremaster man, to lay his goatish disposition on the charge of a star!


"Temptation is the fire that brings up the scum of the heart."

"See Barry, you can get away with anything."

HotWingConspiracy: Hahahaha

You can make that stupid book mean anything you want it to, and there's never a shortage of dupes around.

My favorite is in this case Sanford is not stepping down and the author attributes it to a belief that he is only doing god's will so he should not have to pay for being a loyal soldier.

Religion has been and always will be more powerful than the state.

There is no such thing as "The Family". I spent last summer in something called the "Congressional Fellows" program, it was a summer internship/ leadership training program run by the people supposedly connected with "The Family". Over the summer, I spent time at Ivanwald, the Cedars and the ominously maligned C Street house.
The reason that this fellowship is constantly smeared is because it has no official name or membership rolls. There is simply a group of several pastors who hold multiple Bible studies in the DC area, each with various big names on both sides of the aisle attached to one group or another.
Having participated in these bible studies and discussions myself, I'd like to dismiss any of the fundamentalist notions that outsiders attach to the group - if it can even be called as one. There is a significant theologically left of center presence in the group. Myself included, around half of the students in the program intended to vote for Obama. I know that I did, and unless the others fell victim to the evil cult like mind control we know they possess, I can only assume that the others did as well. These fellowships are often criticized for having so many high Republicans associated with them, seeming proof that a theocratic shadow government is at work. However, this is somewhat of a Catch-22:
A.Attack the "Fellowships" for being made up entirely of Republicans, proving they are fundamentalist theocrats.
B.When Democratic or left-of-center participants are named, argue that this only indicates how deep their reach is, proving they are fundamentalist theocrats.

Granted, this is Fark, so I don't expect to change anyone's mind. However, I do have experience with these fellowships and their leaders so take my at my word or reject me as just another puppet in this conspiracy.

/Also, if the group is so powerful, you'd think I might have a job by now.

I Invented Crack
Thanks for a counter-balanced opinion. I read the excerpt and the guy's sermon (or speech or whatever) sounded a little too concocted, like something out of a Grisham or Clancy novel.

\I'll take both the book excerpt and your post with grains of salt
\\look now I have 2 grains of salt!
\\\you should've included the full "I'm really getting a kick out of these replies"

a church that believes the free market is sacred? I wanna join!

Gov Sanford should really keep reading forward from the story of king David, which he used to excuse his adultery the other day. (Oh and FYI Gov? In the OT, story God forgave David, but only after killing his kid. Personally I'd gone with the "let he who is without sin cast the first Stone bit" where Jesus saves an adulteress from being stoned to death)

Mark chapter 25 justifies every social program ever

Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'

37"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'

40"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'

I always find it interesting that many evangelicals will demand that the biblical position on abortion, homosexuality, and other social issues be made the law of the land, simple because the bible says so. But when you remind them of other biblical commands, such as feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, etc , suddenly those biblical commands are supposed to be a private matter between the believer and his god.

WhyteRaven74: Anyone else remember the second season of Deadliest Catch when one of the captains they followed was a fundie? Remember how he lost his shiat when they announced they'd no longer be having a free for all for crab season? Apparently God only wants people to make money right now, screw being able to make it tomorrow, safety, nature or anything else right now.

Wow, really? A fundie who made money off of the abomination that is shellfish? What level of hypocrite does that make him?

Okay this is quite possibly the scariest version of Christianity I've ever run into:

FTA:


David smiled and winked. "Did you guys see Toy Story?" Half the room had. "Remember how there was a toy cowboy, Woody? And then the boy who owns Woody gets a new toy, a spaceman? Only the toy spaceman thinks he's real. Thinks he's a real spaceman, and he's got to figure out what he's doing on this strange planet. So what does Woody say to him? He says, 'You're just a toy.' " David sat quietly, waiting for us to absorb this. "Just a toy. We're not really spacemen. We're just toys. Created for God. For His plea sure, nothing else. Just a toy. Period."

and this explains why these guys can deal with Scumbags like Tom Delay and overlook all their moral failings:


"Hey," David said, "let's talk about the Old Testament...Who" - he paused - "would you say are its good guys?"
...
"David," Beau volunteered.

"... "Hey, you know what's interesting about King David?" ... "King David," David Coe went on, "liked to do really, really bad things." He chuckled. "Here's this guy who slept with another man's wife - Bathsheba, right? - and then basically murdered her husband. And this guy is one of our heroes." David shook his head. "I mean, Jiminy Christmas, God likes this guy! What," he said, "is that all about?"

"Is it because he tried?" asked Bengt. "He wanted to do the right thing?" ...

"That's nice, Bengt," David said. "But it isn't the answer. Anyone else?"

"Because he was chosen," I said. For the first time David looked my way.

"Yes," he said, smiling. "Chosen. Interesting set of rules, isn't it?" He turned to Beau. "Beau, let's say I hear you raped three little girls. And now here you are at Ivanwald. What would I think of you, Beau?"

Beau, given to bellowing Ivanwald's daily call to sports like a bull elephant, shrank into the cushions. "Probably that I'm pretty bad?"

"No, Beau." David's voice was kind. "I wouldn't." ... "Because," David continued, "I'm not here to judge you. That's not my job. I'm here for only one thing. Do you know what that is?"

Understanding blossomed in Beau's eyes. "Jesus?" he said. "

So apparently you can be any sort of moral monster you want, and if these guys decide you are "Chosen" it's all Hokey-doke. Hell this guy even excuses the atrocities of Ghengis Khan that way:

You guys know about Genghis Khan?" he asked. "Genghis was a man with a vision. He conquered" - David stood on the couch under the map, tracing, with his hand, half the northern hemisphere - "nearly everything. He devastated nearly everything. His enemies? He beheaded them." David swiped a finger across his throat. "Dop, dop, dop, dop."

Genghis Khan's genius, David went on, lay in his understanding that there could be only one king. When Genghis entered a defeated city, he would call in the local headman. Conversion to the Khan's cause was not an option, as Genghis was uninterested in halfhearted deputies. Instead, said David, Genghis would have the man stuffed into a crate, and over the crate's surface would be spread a tablecloth, on which a wonderful meal would be arrayed.

"And then, while the man suffocated, Genghis ate, and he didn't even hear the man's screams." David stood on the couch, a finger in the air. "Do you know what that means?"

..."I think so," I said. "Out with the old, in with the new."

Yes, he nodded. "Christ's parable of the wineskins. You can't pour new into old." One day, he continued, some monks from Europe show up in Genghis Khan's court. Genghis welcomes them in the name of God. Says that in truth, they worship the same great Lord. Then why, the monks ask, must he conquer the world? "I don't ask," says Genghis. "I submit."

David returned to his chair. "We elect our leaders," he said. "Jesus elects his."


So according to him, the man who invented genocide, who made a pyramid of a million human skulls to avenge an insult, was personally chosen by Jesus, and thus we cannot question or condemn his actions
and in case anyone missed the point:


He reached over and squeezed the arm of Pavel. "Isn't that great?" David said. "That's the way everything in life happens. If you're a person known to be around Jesus, you can go and do anything.


Wow, the Bush years make a whole lot more sense now

I don't see how anyone can defend the free market on Christian principles. Capitalism is about selfishness; Christianity is about self-sacrifice.

It's like citing Stalin to defend liberty.

/capitalist
//atheist

SlothB77: a church that believes the free market is sacred? I wanna join!

Face it, churches are businesses.

Somacandra: oldebayer: If the free market is sacred, then why did Jebus throw the moneylenders out of the temple?

Back in the day, the way that I learned it (from a Southern Baptist professor of Old and New Testament) was that the way that the ancient Hebrews constructed the Second Temple-- there were a few main sections, only one of which was open to non-elite rural Hebrews there to get the priests to perform their important animal sacrifices, as in Luke 2:22-29 (new window). That was where the moneychangers were. The most important aspect of the animals used in the sacrifices was that they be umblemished and essentially perfect. The moneychangers were originally there to exchange cash for stock of specimens used in sacrifices, as most people traveling for days did not end up with animals suitable for sacrifice. The moneychangers essentially had an exclusive contract with a captive audience, and were charging extortionary rates. Moreover, they grew in number so that those coming from non-elite backgrounds had trouble sitting in or being in the temple. Of course, any setup like that is hardly a "free market." I'm not a Biblical scholar, so I'm not up to date on the literature, but it makes sense given what else I know about Hebrew temple culture at that time and place.

The story, as I've heard it, is that, at the entrance to the temple were folks who would change Roman money for temple money. Roman money contained a graven image (of the Roman Emperor) and was thus unclean and forbidden inside the temple. The moneychangers were franchised by the temple who took a cut of their profits. And since they were getting a slice of the pie, the priests were apparently looking the other way when the money guys fixed the scales to cheat pilgrims of a fair exchange. (think a 1st century AD Cash4Gold).

Everybody knew it was going on, but they had little choice but to use the moneychangers if they wanted Temple money. BY attacking them and driving them out of the Temple, Jesus was a) winning a lot of popular support by doing what everyone else who got cheated there on a daily basis wanted to do; and b) directly attacking the authority of the Temple Priests and calling them out as corrupt.

Not coincidentially, it was shortly after this attack that the priests started plotting to have him killed

WhyteRaven74: Anyone else remember the second season of Deadliest Catch when one of the captains they followed was a fundie? Remember how he lost his shiat when they announced they'd no longer be having a free for all for crab season? Apparently God only wants people to make money right now, screw being able to make it tomorrow, safety, nature or anything else right now.

There is a certain strain of Fundamentalists who believe that any sort of conservation or environmental awareness is evil because:

A) It's a secret plot to make people Pagan: See pagans worship the earth as the goddess Gaia. So therefore any reference to "mother earth" or any attempt to protect and care for the earth is merely plot to lure Christians away from the true faith and down the dark road of Paganism

B) It Denies the 2nd coming: As all good Christians know, all the signs point to the fact that the 2nd Coming/The Rapture/Aramageddon is at hand. SO why conserve resources when the whole earth will be consumed by fire in the last battle of Armageddon (or is that Ragnarok) any day now?

I Invented Crack: There is no such thing as "The Family". I spent last summer in something called the "Congressional Fellows" program, it was a summer internship/ leadership training program run by the people supposedly connected with "The Family". Over the summer, I spent time at Ivanwald, the Cedars and the ominously maligned C Street house.
The reason that this fellowship is constantly smeared is because it has no official name or membership rolls. There is simply a group of several pastors who hold multiple Bible studies in the DC area, each with various big names on both sides of the aisle attached to one group or another.
Having participated in these bible studies and discussions myself, I'd like to dismiss any of the fundamentalist notions that outsiders attach to the group - if it can even be called as one. There is a significant theologically left of center presence in the group. Myself included, around half of the students in the program intended to vote for Obama. I know that I did, and unless the others fell victim to the evil cult like mind control we know they possess, I can only assume that the others did as well. These fellowships are often criticized for having so many high Republicans associated with them, seeming proof that a theocratic shadow government is at work. However, this is somewhat of a Catch-22:
A.Attack the "Fellowships" for being made up entirely of Republicans, proving they are fundamentalist theocrats.
B.When Democratic or left-of-center participants are named, argue that this only indicates how deep their reach is, proving they are fundamentalist theocrats.

Granted, this is Fark, so I don't expect to change anyone's mind. However, I do have experience with these fellowships and their leaders so take my at my word or reject me as just another puppet in this conspiracy.

/Also, if the group is so powerful, you'd think I might have a job by now.

You should write a rebuttal book then, and get rich and go on the talk show circuit.

/The version of Christianity they espouse does not correspond to Christianity as I understand it, at all.

Catholics are better than them, for we were founded by Jesus Christ.

And Something tells me that Jesus looks more kindly upon Socialism than Adultery.

/I'm a Catholic Free market Republican

HowDareYouCallMeAHoser: tatum: Yeah...The Family are a bunch of religious nutbags with very few redeeming features...
...and while she left the Jebus fundies behind, I merely wish to present ONE thing that The Family produced:



/hot like Taiwan summer

tatum: Goddamn it!

HOT LIKE TAIWAN SUMMER!

Liv Lo (new window)

God, please forgive those that know not that they fail, twice. For an image to be hot it must be an image, and not a link. Is not every link a hot link? Amen.

Can't link to image because it's not an image, it's a link.
Hot refers to Liv (sadly only an acquaintance), not the link.

/sweaty...like Formosa July

I am also afraid of "Opus Dei and the Time"... That is one scary group.

As a Christian, reading this sort of crap makes me cry.

RemyDuron: Hillary Clinton is also a member.

Citation needed.

I love the people that scream about the idea of Free Market (and that's usually all they can talk about) when it comes to the economy.

If it wouldn't be such a huge mess, I wish they could see a REAL free market and realize how farking stupid the idea is - and how impossible it would be.

>> Both John Ensign and Mark Sanford are part of a secretive church called the Family that believes the free market is sacred.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

You farkin cons are sooooooooo nuts.

Have you prayed to Milton Friedman today LOSERS

I Invented Crack: There is no such thing as "The Family". ...

Granted, this is Fark, so I don't expect to change anyone's mind. However, I do have experience with these fellowships and their leaders so take my at my word or reject me as just another puppet in this conspiracy.



For what it's worth, you've put my mind at ease.

There's a psychological principal at work, in everyone, no matter where they find themselves on the political spectrum -- People love getting riled up. So I guess it's not all that surprising when, on closer examination, sometimes things aren't as frightening as they seemed at first.

Good luck with the job hunt...

Governor Sandford invoked the name of King David as a reason for staying in office. He pretty much said that David had done the same and was allowed to stay in office, so should he.

The Family is an elitist cult with a sense of entitlement. They feel that if they can get away with something, it must have been divinely sanctioned. It's an insane interpretation of religion as a means of satisfying immensely greedy and unethical behavior.

Apparently this is all related to the prosperity gospel, which last showed up before the first Great Depression. The Bush tie in was use of the terms Ownership Society and/or Opportunity Society.

Hobodeluxe: Remember when the economic crisis kicked into high gear and a bunch of them went up to Wall st. and prayed to the golden bull in front of Merrill Lynch?

Somehow I think Moses might have a problem with this...

You shall not make for yourself an idol, whether in the form of anything that is in heaven above, or that is on the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.

My relijus edumacation is based mostly on watching tv an easter while stoned, but is that or is that not a farking GOLDEN CALF??!

lilbjorn: RemyDuron: Hillary Clinton is also a member.

Citation needed.

All ready gave two.

ghare: SlothB77: a church that believes the free market is sacred? I wanna join!

Face it, churches are businesses.

With tax-free apartments in this case

Prospero424: And by "obey", I mean do whatever the clergy tell us God wants us to do. It's not like we mere plebians can know the whims of the almighty.

That's why our betters are so eager to . . . serve us.

It's a cookbook.

There has got to be a good way to scam religious freaks out of all their money. Anyone want to team up with me?

1)find way to scam fundie scum
2)...
3)profit!

Probably the only scamming I wouldn't feel guilty after doing.

neongoats: There has got to be a good way to scam religious freaks out of all their money. Anyone want to team up with me?

1)find way to scam fundie scum
2)...
3)profit!

Probably the only scamming I wouldn't feel guilty after doing.

You could always build a church. That's the tried and tested way to scam fundies out of their cash.

keith olbermann has the hairiest knuckles ever in that pic. Probably looks like wet ourangutan when he steps out of the NBC shower.

/primate. hoohah.
//drunk on thursday