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(ESPN) Cool Albert Pujols blasts homerun # 29 and 30. On pace to become first non-juiced player to pass Roger Maris' record of 61   (sports.espn.go.com) divider line 125
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the biggest redneck here [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 02:27:14 PM  
you have pee hands: Too big of a name. Someone would have outed him like A-Rod. I'll bet most of that list is journeymen and bench players.

A-Rod stayed hidden for years, and Sosa only came out after running at the mouth about the HOF. The list is almost assuredly mostly big-name players, seeing how those on juice are better than those who are not.

 
the biggest redneck here [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 02:29:27 PM  
The Crepes of Wrath: Lost Thought 00: There are a 104 proven cheaters out there in hiding. Odds are good he's one of them.

There are 30 teams, each with 25 men on the roster. That's 750 players in the majors. 104/750 is 13.9%. Seems like the odds are better that he's not one of them.

Since you're just basing it on numbers, of course.


Dude, they all KNEW the test was coming and 1 in 7 STILL failed. Pathetic. And all they've done now is switch to HGH and other mostly undetectable stuff.

 
GossipTrain 2009-07-01 02:31:15 PM  
elvisbloom: srhp29: Albert Pujols is the new A-Rod? The guy who hasn't been outed yet that people defend by using some sort of line of reasoning that eventually dies when it comes out he did test positive at some point?

Another day, another whining comment from the cry baby whiner.


elvisbloom felt good about that comment. Then he feathered his mullet, kicked his sister out of bed, and headed to Billy's driving school/bar to catch his favorite team, the Cardinals.

 
thomps [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 02:31:17 PM  
the biggest redneck here: seeing how those on juice are better than those who are not.

i'd be willing to bet that the stats don't match that claim. from what i've read, most of the people doping are the people trying to break out of the minors/stay in the show. they are desperate enough to juice because they are standing on the brink. guys that are comfortably hitting 30 hr a year (with the obvious exceptions) aren't as likely to risk it.

 
the biggest redneck here [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 02:32:58 PM  
thomps: the biggest redneck here: seeing how those on juice are better than those who are not.

i'd be willing to bet that the stats don't match that claim.


Look at the all-star rosters from five years ago.

the biggest redneck here: The Crepes of Wrath: Lost Thought 00: There are a 104 proven cheaters out there in hiding. Odds are good he's one of them.

There are 30 teams, each with 25 men on the roster. That's 750 players in the majors. 104/750 is 13.9%. Seems like the odds are better that he's not one of them.

Since you're just basing it on numbers, of course.

Dude, they all KNEW the test was coming and 1 in 7 STILL failed. Pathetic. And all they've done now is switch to HGH and other mostly undetectable stuff.


... and I don't think that they tested every MLB player, either.

 
Quel [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 02:33:33 PM  
I am not a machine.

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 02:35:29 PM  
Lost Thought 00: Thesaurus Rex: I guess you're innocent until proven guilty unless you're good at baseball.

There are a 104 proven cheaters out there in hiding. Odds are good he's one of them.


i'm not sure you know what odds are. if a team has a 40 man roster and there are 30 teams, the odds are actually against it being any one player. plus he's never been implicated in anything that's been released.

 
you have pee hands 2009-07-01 02:41:17 PM  
the biggest redneck here: you have pee hands: Too big of a name. Someone would have outed him like A-Rod. I'll bet most of that list is journeymen and bench players.

A-Rod stayed hidden for years, and Sosa only came out after running at the mouth about the HOF. The list is almost assuredly mostly big-name players, seeing how those on juice are better than those who are not.


Out of the guys who have received suspensions since 2005, there's a lot of nobodies and several of the somebodies were on the downside of their career, and only a few stars.

It's possible the stars all wised up or are on something better and undetectable but my guess is the 104 wouldn't look much different from that list.

 
Sujer 2009-07-01 02:41:34 PM  
Enfenestrate: WaltzingMathilda: i love this argument. his minor league performance was great, and every year of his major league performance is outstanding. they test all the time. the guy won't even drink a beer. it's highly unlikely he's done anything considering his consistency and the fact that he's not all that big.

Sounds a lot like what people used to say about Alex Rodriguez.

As for me, I'm just going to assume that basically anyone with half decent numbers is on the juice, Including Pujols.


I have decided to take the opposite approach. I would rather not be jaded this early on in my life. I will continue assuming no one is on the juice until proven otherwise.

Of course, with the way things are going, this may make me even more jaded in less time :( who knows...

 
Ponzholio 2009-07-01 02:48:23 PM  
I think within the next couple weeks (after Manny comes back) we'll hear of another big name player revealed for roid use... I feel that if they'd announce all or most of the 100+ players at once, they'd risk baseball completely collapsing, so they are just going to 'leak' 1-2 players at a time to soften the blow...

 
thomps [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 02:48:55 PM  
the biggest redneck here: Look at the all-star rosters from five years ago.

ok i looked at the 2004 all star lineup and compared them to this list (new window). of the 42 position players, only 9 were on the list. that's 21%, which isn't exactly a screaming majority.

 
beerrun [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 02:52:09 PM  
Juice or no juice, that first shot he hit off the Unit last night was absolutely crushed.

 
Orgasmatron138 2009-07-01 02:57:28 PM  
GossipTrain: elvisbloom: srhp29: Albert Pujols is the new A-Rod? The guy who hasn't been outed yet that people defend by using some sort of line of reasoning that eventually dies when it comes out he did test positive at some point?

Another day, another whining comment from the cry baby whiner.

elvisbloom felt good about that comment. Then he feathered his mullet, kicked his sister out of bed, scratched his red sideburns, put on his jean shorts, and headed to Billy's driving school/bar to catch his favorite team, the Cardinals.



/Cardinal nation, all red sideburns and jean shorts.
/Then again, my fellow Cub fans all seem to have ugly long curly hair, racist clothing, and can't talk without beer-belching first. I guess we all suck.

 
williamzabka 2009-07-01 02:58:00 PM  
Ponzholio: I think within the next couple weeks (after Manny comes back) we'll hear of another big name player revealed for roid use... I feel that if they'd announce all or most of the 100+ players at once, they'd risk baseball completely collapsing, so they are just going to 'leak' 1-2 players at a time to soften the blow...

Who is this they you are speaking about?

 
Doogled 2009-07-01 03:01:14 PM  
yogaFLAME: HulkHands: take from those what you will

He's still pretty huge in the rookie photo. He's always been thick, unlike Bonds or McGwire.

Anyway, read the article about him in SI entitled "Albert Pujols has a message: You can believe in me." It's pretty convincing.


That's kind of like wagging your finger in front of Congress and claiming that you never took steroids...

 
Pujols 2009-07-01 03:14:13 PM  
I am not on the juice, damn it!

 
FishingWithFredo 2009-07-01 03:14:34 PM  
Statistical anomaly? In this era?

Roided and voided.

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 03:16:07 PM  
FishingWithFredo: Statistical anomaly? In this era?

Roided and voided.


duh. nobody anywhere is exceptional at anything.

 
lefdeee 2009-07-01 03:19:12 PM  
asmodeus224: All you know about him is what MLB and his publicists sell you. You know nothing.

As do you.

 
Brain_Damage 2009-07-01 03:23:04 PM  
There are very few players left who would surprise me if they tested positive and Pujols is one of them. I've watched him destroy Astros pitching for the last 8 years now and the guy is simply a baseball freak.

 
Mr. Potatoass 2009-07-01 03:38:15 PM  

 
Dawg47 2009-07-01 03:48:50 PM  
Brain_Damage: There are very few players left who would surprise me if they tested positive and Pujols is one of them. I've watched him destroy Astros pitching for the last 8 years now and the guy is simply a baseball freak.

He's always had enormous size and the frame to do this. He doesn't have piano teeth or a giant head, or a caveman brow. His performance hasn't changed through the years and he's been through a rigorous minor league program pre-2001 and a major league program from 2004 onward.

 
The Black Guy from Platoon 2009-07-01 03:51:12 PM  
I gotta say, I don't really care if players juice or not. It appears pretty much rampant in the NFL and people don't complain.*

*talking out of my ass, correct me if I'm wrong.

 
senorpogo 2009-07-01 03:57:56 PM  
Forget the 'roids. Why do teams even pitch to this guy?
I'd force Ryan Ludwick to beat me every time.

 
PunchDrunkPanda 2009-07-01 03:59:37 PM  
He's probably juiced, likely not juicing anymore. Those of you who care are as idiotic as those who would be surprised.

 
cycoivan 2009-07-01 04:00:43 PM  
perilsensitive: He had to be juiced. No one hit Brad Lidge that year.

/remembers it like the jfk assassination


By the way, did that ball ever come down or is it still in orbit?

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:05:36 PM  
perilsensitive: He had to be juiced. No one hit Brad Lidge that year.

/remembers it like the jfk assassination


oh, well then obviously brad lidge juiced too! when anyone anywhere is good at anything, they are cheaters.

 
FreeMedical 2009-07-01 04:12:18 PM  
As a Cardinal fan, I hope he is legit to no end. This guy is an absolute monster who has put up very similar numbers since his rookie year. While some sluggers/stars have declined during the steroid-scare era, Pujols has kept going.

I can all but guarantee that with as visible as he is in the league, he is tested on more than a regular basis. If he hasn't appeared on any of the rumor lists, any of the implications, and doesn't appear to be slowing down in any form then I think it's safe to say 1 of 2 things:

1) He's clean and people are being overly skeptical.

2) He has better secret doctors and undetectable steroids than the other top players in the league that make significantly more money than he does.

 
It Smee [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:22:27 PM  
lefdeee: It Smee: Of course he's juiced. Bonds never failed a test either.

What flawless logic.


It was in reference to the people posting that he must be clean because he never failed a test.

He clearly is juicing. His rise in prominence and outstanding numbers fit the timeline and profile of steroids perfectly. Plus his agent is Scott Boras. It seems like most of that guys clients get busted eventually. Any why not cheat? Those guys get paid.

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:23:42 PM  
It Smee: lefdeee: It Smee: Of course he's juiced. Bonds never failed a test either.

What flawless logic.

It was in reference to the people posting that he must be clean because he never failed a test.

He clearly is juicing. His rise in prominence and outstanding numbers fit the timeline and profile of steroids perfectly. Plus his agent is Scott Boras. It seems like most of that guys clients get busted eventually. Any why not cheat? Those guys get paid.


he never rose in prominence, he's put up the same numbers every year of his major league career. he's always been prominent.

 
thomps [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:24:46 PM  
WaltzingMathilda: he never rose in prominence, he's put up the same numbers every year of his major league career. he's always been prominent.

yeah but he never tested positive for steroids so he must be juicing.

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:28:58 PM  
thomps: WaltzingMathilda: he never rose in prominence, he's put up the same numbers every year of his major league career. he's always been prominent.

yeah but he never tested positive for steroids so he must be juicing.


i juiced last night, all up on your mama's a-crack.

 
thomps [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:32:36 PM  
WaltzingMathilda: i juiced last night, all up on your mama's a-crack.

you'll probably be testing positive in the near future :(

 
It Smee [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:33:57 PM  
WaltzingMathilda: he never rose in prominence, he's put up the same numbers every year of his major league career. he's always been prominent.

Right, he came into the league in 2001 hit 37 HR after one season in the minors where he hit 19 HR. No steroids going on that year!

 
chimp_ninja [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:35:54 PM  
expobill: Q: how many times was Roger Maris intentionally walked in 1961?
/i know!


A: Hitting in front of Mickey Got-Damn Mantle has its privileges. Mantle had a much better year that year, as an aside-- with a higher HR/AB to boot. (Mantle drew a lot more walks, and missed a dozen games or so.)

A2: Pujols does not have this luxury. 2008 Ludwick would scare some pitchers, but 2009 Ludwick is barely above being a replacement-level corner outfielder.

 
chimp_ninja [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:40:28 PM  
It Smee: Right, he came into the league in 2001 hit 37 HR after one season in the minors where he hit 19 HR.

This just in: Players who are 20 years old and hit tons of doubles (41 in 490 AB) are likely to develop into home run hitters quite soon.

Pujols slugged .565 in Peoria, .610 as a rookie, and .561 as a sophomore, by the way.

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:44:03 PM  
It Smee: WaltzingMathilda: he never rose in prominence, he's put up the same numbers every year of his major league career. he's always been prominent.

Right, he came into the league in 2001 hit 37 HR after one season in the minors where he hit 19 HR. No steroids going on that year!


he hit 19 HR in 133 games and then 37 in 161 the next. not exactly relative, but you can expect (a) more HR in more games, and (b) more HR when you are another year more experienced when you are that young and talented. he hit .324 in 2001 and .329 the following year - it's consistent.

people can either be exceptional rookies, average or poor. none of these things means "juice"

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 04:45:25 PM  
chimp_ninja: It Smee: Right, he came into the league in 2001 hit 37 HR after one season in the minors where he hit 19 HR.

This just in: Players who are 20 years old and hit tons of doubles (41 in 490 AB) are likely to develop into home run hitters quite soon.

Pujols slugged .565 in Peoria, .610 as a rookie, and .561 as a sophomore, by the way.


your ability quote stats is above average. you must be a god damned steroid user.

 
Patterson 2009-07-01 04:46:19 PM  
While I don't think he was or is a juicer, you really can't assume anymore. Everyone is a suspect, this whole damned era will be tainted.

 
you have pee hands 2009-07-01 04:50:38 PM  
WaltzingMathilda: chimp_ninja: It Smee: Right, he came into the league in 2001 hit 37 HR after one season in the minors where he hit 19 HR.

This just in: Players who are 20 years old and hit tons of doubles (41 in 490 AB) are likely to develop into home run hitters quite soon.

Pujols slugged .565 in Peoria, .610 as a rookie, and .561 as a sophomore, by the way.

your ability quote stats is above average. you must be a god damned steroid user.


Steroids don't help that. He's on greenies.

 
seyheystretch 2009-07-01 05:08:43 PM  
Does HGH count as juice?
They will continue to use it until the union agrees to testing.

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 05:17:56 PM  
this thread has almost 100 comments at this point, and i'm pretty sure the last pujols thread only had 37. clearly fark is juicing. disgusting.

 
It Smee [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-07-01 05:49:22 PM  
I don't know for sure whether he hasn't or he hasn't but it looks like A-rod and Manny all over again. People say these guys were just natural hitters too. Maybe Pujols is not. I hope he's not but it sure doesn't look that way. Also, the Boras-Steroid connection is looking worse all the time and he is Pujols' agent.

You also wrote:

he hit 19 HR in 133 games and then 37 in 161 the next. not exactly relative, but you can expect (a) more HR in more games, and (b) more HR when you are another year more experienced when you are that young and talented. he hit .324 in 2001 and .329 the following year - it's consistent.

For (a)and (b) - you don't expect to see a jump in numbers from minor to majors no matter how good you are. The competition is better.

Maybe you are a big Cardinals fan, I don't know I didn't look at your profile. But you seem to get pretty upset at the suggestion that Albert is using. I remember feeling that way about McGwire before it came out and then feeling like that about Manny and A-rod before they were found guilty. Maybe Pujols hasn't but he sure fits the profile of exceptional performance in era of performance enhancing. There's rampant speculation he has lied about his age and if that's true, why would that be the only thing he lied about?

 
missiv 2009-07-01 06:00:36 PM  
No one seems to be asking the most important question. Has Albert's skull grown in mass, recently.


/personally, I think he's a monster on the field.
//A very clean monster.
///Cubbie fan here.

 
Fark Griswald 2009-07-01 06:03:41 PM  
Pujols: I am not on the juice, damn it!

img1.fark.net

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 06:15:07 PM  
It Smee: I remember feeling that way about McGwire before it came out

how could you have felt that way about McGwire? He was a stick figure in his prime and then gained 30+ pounds of muscle mass and his head literally got bigger in his late 30s when he was supposed to be declining. His growth was obviously not natural.

It Smee: But you seem to get pretty upset at the suggestion that Albert is using.

All things Albert that have come out during the years have been pretty pointed the other direction. I'm a huge baseball fan, but yes my team is primarily the Cardinals. I just think it's lame to say someone who is exceptionally good is a juicer. Was Maddux a juicer because he could locate pitches at 100 years old? And to connect juicing to an agent is just silly. Remember, Pujols hasn't really had to use his agent since 2001.

His hitting has been consistent for 8 years. So has the size of his body.

 
WaltzingMathilda [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 06:16:34 PM  
It Smee: For (a)and (b) - you don't expect to see a jump in numbers from minor to majors no matter how good you are. The competition is better.

Also, juice doesn't make you a better hitter, it makes you a bigger human that recovers faster. And he hit .324 in the minors and .329 in the majors. Consistency. Dude sees the ball and hits it. Don't give me that bat speed argument either b/c it's just not proven.

 
Chastain86 2009-07-01 06:20:54 PM  
If you're more than a passing baseball fan, you'd know how ridiculous it is to say Pujols is juicing. But don't let that stop you from making baseless accusations. After all, that's truly the National Sport here at Fark.

 
lefdeee 2009-07-01 06:25:06 PM  
It Smee: lefdeee: It Smee: Of course he's juiced. Bonds never failed a test either.

What flawless logic.

It was in reference to the people posting that he must be clean because he never failed a test.

He clearly is juicing. His rise in prominence and outstanding numbers fit the timeline and profile of steroids perfectly. Plus his agent is Scott Boras. It seems like most of that guys clients get busted eventually. Any why not cheat? Those guys get paid.


The "Chewbaca defense" of the sports world. Any single fact can mean someone is on steroids.

Player hits worse/fewer homers?

He was juicing.

Player hits better/more homers?

He is juicing.

Player gets injured?

He was juicing.

Player stays healthy?

Must be all those steroids he is doing.

 
Your_Huckleberry [TotalFark] 2009-07-01 06:45:17 PM  
bukketmaster: mjoven1975: haemaker: They still lost...

*enpty trophy case*

That is all.

Can we dispense with the facts and get back to sarcasm, please? The truth is too painful.


Really. Is it too much to ask being able to enjoy the wins the last couple nights? Too much to enjoy the season so far? They were supposed to suck, they don't suck! Why can't we enjoy????
(Deep breath) Okay, better now.

beerrun: Juice or no juice, that first shot he hit off the Unit last night was absolutely crushed.

That was amazing. The night before, Juan Uribe drilled a pretty impressive blast into the area of the Big Mac Land sign, so the Giants broadcast showed footage of the laser shot Pujols hit into the sign, breaking the 'I'. Then Pujols turns around and hits one even further the next game. Why even pitch to him? Pujols is the best player in the game right now and quickly becoming one of the best right handed hitters of all time.


Meanwhile, Pablo Sandoval is badass! He deserves to join Cain and Linsecum on the NL All Star team. Just don't get 'sick' again this year, Timmy!

 
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