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(Toledo Blade) Dumbass Add "dump marijuana from an airplane" to the list of things drug runners should not do to avoid capture by police   (toledoblade.com) divider line 38
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9321 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jun 2009 at 1:29 AM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

38 Comments   (+0 »)


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UsikFark 2009-06-21 01:31:11 AM  
Then what will be left to wash up on FL's beaches?

 
Accent 2009-06-21 01:32:41 AM  
brb, heading to May Road and State Rt. 598 south of Willard

 
CelesX 2009-06-21 01:32:56 AM  
Cubans

 
hurdboy [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 01:34:24 AM  
I mean, it works some of the time when they throw it out the window on COPS. Should work all the time from a plane, right?

 
Pribar [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 01:37:17 AM  
why won't anyone do this for me, all I ever find in my fields is bags of trash or body parts.

 
UsikFark 2009-06-21 01:40:32 AM  
hurdboy: I mean, it works some of the time when they throw it out the window on COPS. Should work all the time from a plane, right?

Isn't that what Miami Vice was about?

 
Surool [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 01:41:41 AM  
C'mon Jabba, even I get boarded sometimes...

 
tuffsnake 2009-06-21 01:42:08 AM  
ecx.images-amazon.com

/obscure?

 
vrod2028 2009-06-21 01:42:42 AM  
www.grouchyoldcripple.com

/hot like roach burn

 
thereadlines [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 01:44:25 AM  
Would their haul even cover the fuel costs? Anyway, it's a good thing that they recovered those 15 lbs of pot.

 
Pribar [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 01:47:27 AM  
thereadlines: Would their haul even cover the fuel costs? Anyway, it's a good thing that they recovered those 15 lbs of pot.

They probably believed those inflated "drug bust" numbers the cops use when they announce a seizure and thought that the proceeds from the sale of their 10 lbs of pot would easily cover all expenses with a nice margin left over.

 
mynameist 2009-06-21 01:48:20 AM  
This case could still be a little shaky as the witness is not really described well. I can see even a tiny mistake by law enforcement throwing this entire case away.

Secondly, 20 pounds of New Mexico bud doesn't really seem worthy of a cross-country trafficking flight IMO. I mean at least back in my bud smoking days, this would go in bulk for maybe 5-6 grand. I'm sure it's worth at least a half a mil in cop math though.

 
eas81 2009-06-21 01:53:59 AM  
Pribar: thereadlines: Would their haul even cover the fuel costs? Anyway, it's a good thing that they recovered those 15 lbs of pot.

They probably believed those inflated "drug bust" numbers the cops use when they announce a seizure and thought that the proceeds from the sale of their 10 lbs of pot would easily cover all expenses with a nice margin left over.


will get knocked down to a misdemeneor when the DA presents the 5lbs. to the grand jury.

 
signaljammer 2009-06-21 01:55:51 AM  
As long as you possibly can, keep your dope of a given type in one bag. Subdivision looks like commoditization which reeks of commerce. If you keep it in one bag, the possibility of arguing that it is stash remains. and if you need to dump it from an airplane, you can sprinkle it out the window, making the authorities' task that much more difficult.

//Container Store sells
//really large bags.
//ignore the cashier's smirks.
//they probably make like $10/hr.
//and are probably chronically under-dosin'
//whether they know it or not

 
UsikFark 2009-06-21 02:00:47 AM  
eas81: Pribar: thereadlines: Would their haul even cover the fuel costs? Anyway, it's a good thing that they recovered those 15 lbs of pot.

They probably believed those inflated "drug bust" numbers the cops use when they announce a seizure and thought that the proceeds from the sale of their 10 lbs of pot would easily cover all expenses with a nice margin left over.

will get knocked down to a misdemeneor when the DA presents the 5lbs. to the grand jury.


But what happened to the other two pounds?

 
mehtoole 2009-06-21 02:01:16 AM  
A witness spotted the bag dropped from the plane and contacted authorities.

So had it not been for that dick witness....

 
skittel 2009-06-21 02:02:12 AM  
img37.imageshack.us
aproves

 
Archie DeBunker [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 02:02:44 AM  
mynameist: This case could still be a little shaky as the witness is not really described well. I can see even a tiny mistake by law enforcement throwing this entire case away.

I'm thinking that it might be possible to convince a jury that there is a possibility that the duffel bag that "fell" out of the aircraft when a door malfunctioned and opened unexpectely did not coontain pot, but did in fact contain the clothing of one of the individuals on the plane. It is entirely possible that this pot was planted by law enforcement, or perhaps the witness, wanting to be a hero planted 25 pounds of ditch weed in the bag and kept the defendants clothes for himself.

As has been mentioned, why would anyone take a cross country trip to deliver 25 pounds of pot using an aircraft? A bit expenseve for the payout.

As far as the scent of pot the K9 picked up on the plane, who knows who else has been in that plane. Probably some hippie mechanic smoked a joint while servicing the aircraft.

 
UsikFark 2009-06-21 02:04:21 AM  
Archie DeBunker: coontain

filter pwnd!

 
Martin The Mess 2009-06-21 02:06:50 AM  
'Jane....the drug they call 'jane....

/the drug they call 'jane, was dropped from that plane
//and all that ganja hit sky
///obvious?

 
Archie DeBunker [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 02:08:46 AM  
UsikFark: Archie DeBunker: coontain

filter pwnd!


Oh my.

 
Hoax_Device 2009-06-21 02:14:48 AM  
So, the deal is we're driving up into the jungle with a guy we don't even know who's wearing sunglasses in the middle of the night. We should hand him our wallets and slit our own throats.

 
Dashman 2009-06-21 02:20:04 AM  
These are the stupidest drug runners in the world I'll tell ya. Listen this is how you do it...

First you open up the engine section of the left wing of the plane (where the door is usually, depending on what kind of plane you are flying.) You then remove the engine. This might take a month. Then you take a large caliber fully automatic weapon like an M60 and you spray the wing with it, just a little bit. It has to be a neat line of high caliber holes. Then you put the engine back in. This might take another month.

Then you place the drugs in a sealed back. Seal it up good, make sure it is plastic though so it melts. None of this duffle bag shiat. You are going to want small plastic packages. Take them all and put them in a metal trash can, keep a gas can full of jet fuel nearby.

In flight, if you suspect you are being followed... which is easy to tell due to the planes behind you radio-ing you and saying 'Hey! Who are you? Where are you going? WTF?'.


1: If this starts going on, what you do is you pour the jet fuel into the metal trash can. You don't NEED MUCH. Just about a quater gallon per 2 kilos of packages. Then you shake the trash can to make sure that the packages are covered in the stuff.

2: Open the door A CRACK. You don't need much you just need to depressurize the cabin and get a good cross stream going. Open up any other doors or windows or holes you can. If worse comes to worse, shoot a small hole in the other side of the plane. This provides for ventilation so that when you light the trash can all of the smoke will go right out the door.

3: Have the pilot radio the closest tower and ask if there are military exercises going on in the area. (Because he sees a jet coming right at him.)

4: Light the trash can- keep it near the door, you don't want that shiat spilling.

5: Wait a moment.

6: Open the door and kick the entire trash can out of the door while the plane banks left to help dump it.

7: Signal a may-day and scream out over the com to whoever will listen "OMG THEY'RE SHOOTING AT US! OMG! HELP!!!!"

8: Allow air traffic control to direct you to the nearest airport for emergency landing.

9: Show everyone that'll listen the bullet holes in the wing of the plane.

10: File charges against border patrol.

Aftermath:

First of all, border patrol does not have armed jets. The did witness the entire affair however so they will make good witnesses in the trial. Whether you win or loose the trial (You'll probably loose) you'll still divert attention from all the drugs you dumped. Since they were plastic and covered in fire, there will be nothing left of them however the border patrol saw the smoke, heard you screaming and saw flaming jet fuel fly out of your plane during some apparent explosion. When questioned, the US Air Force will not confirm or deny shooting at your plane. They will say...

Matters of National Security.

 
Archie DeBunker [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 02:21:48 AM  
I have another theory. The duffel bag contained pot and a large amount of cash. Only the pot went into evidence.

 
Rabble27 2009-06-21 02:49:07 AM  
www.lowculture.com

approves and then some

 
BlueJay206 2009-06-21 03:04:41 AM  
tuffsnake: /obscure?

Nope. That was my first thought as I saw the headline.

Bales of cocaine falling from low-flying planes,
I dunno who done dropped 'em, but I thank 'em just the same

 
dapperfapper 2009-06-21 03:54:54 AM  
BlueJay206: tuffsnake: /obscure?

Nope. That was my first thought as I saw the headline.

Bales of cocaine falling from low-flying planes,
I dunno who done dropped 'em, but I thank 'em just the same


mine was, should get a gunslinger to hide that stash

 
msheda 2009-06-21 04:51:05 AM  
Did they make them sit on the Group W bench?

/drtfa

 
AndreMA 2009-06-21 06:24:01 AM  
Why was the border patrol stalking following an entirely domestic light aircraft flight?

 
consciousNOT [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 06:51:04 AM  
Is Mexican weed strong enough to be considered marijuana?

 
thelordofcheese 2009-06-21 07:33:25 AM  
tuffsnake: /obscure?

goddammit

 
SomGuye 2009-06-21 08:19:09 AM  
Would be great if they got hit for littering too.

/Kick 'em while they're down.

 
phreakmonkey 2009-06-21 09:33:34 AM  
Dashman: These are the stupidest drug runners in the world I'll tell ya. Listen this is how you do it...


... wow. Pass that to the left, will ya?

 
Terrified Asexual Forcemeat 2009-06-21 09:42:55 AM  
The Mary Jane falls mainly on the plain.

 
KatjaMouse [TotalFark] 2009-06-21 02:06:55 PM  
I had a boss once who's brother's lawn was covered in an exploded bail of pot. He called the police to report about it and a clean up crew came out and assured him he wasn't going to get in trouble and that this happens all the time when runners try to dump their cargo when being pursued or investigated.

A few months later he found sprouts in his lawn and called the cops not wanting to be arrested for pot farming. He was instructed to burn the lawn. Well, he called his friends and they all kicked back and took in the smoldering slow burn on a nice evening.

 
WFern 2009-06-21 07:07:31 PM  
geekwhisperin.files.wordpress.com

"Jabba's through with you. He has no use for smugglers who drop their shipments at the first sign of an Imperial cruiser."

 
kagemaru026 [TotalFark] 2009-06-22 10:17:20 AM  
Shoulda tried a somersault.

 
burgle23 2009-06-22 12:29:42 PM  
I was born in this tiny town so i'm getting a kick etc.
You could moon someone at the grocery store and make front page news, so this must be the talk of the town.

 
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