"Twilight" star Talentless asshat to portray Norwegian black metal singer and church burner Varg Vikernes another talentless asshat in upcoming movie, which the director describes as "a fun portrayal of Norway"

FTFY

The real question is whether or not they'll do the controversial scene in which the band plays baseball during a thunderstorm.

But how will they handle him sparkling in the sun?

I've been waiting my whole life for this...

pah. Might as well get William H. Macy to play hendrix

I can hear /mu's screams of horror from here

satanicsantoku: good book. but vikernes is overrated, and a racist asshat plus he murdered a bandmate in cold blood. fark that guy.
/burzum is TERRIBLE, people just jock it because homeboy is a murderer. how very kvlt.

also a fascinating read, with better music.

Is this the guy who ate the guitarist's heart to gain his skills?

Even though it's gruesome, it's kind of awesome.

/in a horror-movie way.

Dvarg is a tool. Burzum sucks, though he did inspire some great bands.

Great, it's being marketed as a teen horror. I can't wait to see all the Instant Black Metal Experts this film will surely produce.

I'm almost speechless. A teen horror movie? What the fark?

Also, fark that murderous nazi fark. Can't wait to see how they glorify him.

Will it have the "Haunted Chicken" or the "Missing Beans"?

satanicsantoku: /burzum is TERRIBLE, people just jock it because homeboy is a murderer. how very kvlt.

Varg is an asshole, no denying that. But Filosofem is an awesome album.

BigSnatch: Great, it's being marketed as a teen horror. I can't wait to see all the Instant Black Metal Experts this film will surely produce.

And school is going to be so much fun when it's cool to like black metal. Everyone will be wearing black metal shirts because it's the "cool" thing to do and not because they actually like the music.

/People wearing band shirts for bands that they know nothing about is one of my pet peeves.

timefishblue: I've been waiting my whole life for this...

beat me to it!

dont care who is in it! Some times a story is so good it makes up for the acting, or lack of.

not a huge fan of this Metal genre, but I do like the stories about it. I buy a lot of shirts from EBay to wear on stage. But they are more NWOBHM, like Raven, Angelwitch, Tank, etc...

/just though of his next movie
//michael moore of heavy metal
///slashy!!
////name him ftw!

GonzoNihilist: /just though of his next movie
//michael moore of heavy metal
///slashy!!
////name him ftw!

Swear, the best part of his Headbanger's Journey is when Gaahl from Gorgoroth just says 'Satan' and takes a sip of wine when asked about the drivers of his music.

If the soundtrack isn't black metal then the whole thing will suck.

theapp: GonzoNihilist: /just though of his next movie
//michael moore of heavy metal
///slashy!!
////name him ftw!

Swear, the best part of his Headbanger's Journey is when Gaahl from Gorgoroth just says 'Satan' and takes a sip of wine when asked about the drivers of his music.

I would name him but it seems it has already been Dunn.

that part with Gaahl is farking great. I think it's one of the top five moments of all visually recorded history. hilarious stuff.

Architecture Of Aggression: that part with Gaahl is farking great. I think it's one of the top five moments of all visually recorded history. hilarious stuff.

I preferred the Dio and Mayhem Scenes over Gaahl's.

That movie was pretty hit or miss for me.

Oh wow, just noticed Sion Sono is directing. That will make it...interesting. His other movies are farking out there.

SPna15: satanicsantoku:
BigSnatch: Great, it's being marketed as a teen horror. I can't wait to see all the Instant Black Metal Experts this film will surely produce.

And school is going to be so much fun when it's cool to like black metal. Everyone will be wearing black metal shirts because it's the "cool" thing to do and not because they actually like the music.

/People wearing band shirts for bands that they know nothing about is one of my pet peeves.

Nope, because despite starring the guy from Twilight, this movie will not be a "hit". Count on it.

*bangs head on desk*
*bangs head on desk*
*bangs head on desk*

Wonderful... Absolutely wonderful... I'm pretty sure right now Abbath and Satyr are laughing so hard you can hear it across the Atlantic - SERIOUSLY?! THE KID FROM TWILIGHT?! (I got forced to watch it by my 14-year-old cousin. I'm 25. To say that it left me wanting more wouldn't be an overstatement, it would just be really, really wrong... and if I ever see him in public I'm going to scream 'The Hunger' 2008 RULED!')

Still not going to keep me from laughing when I hear:
"Robert Pattinson IS... Varg Vikernes, Mark Wahlberg as Oystein Aarseth (Euronymous) and Macaulay Culkin as Olve Eikemo (Abbath) IN... "I Was a Teenage Nihilist Who Hated God - A Love Story with Adolf Hitler"

...Actually, get Matt Stone and Trey Parker (South Park, yeah, yeah... BUT they also did 'Cannibal!: The Musical!" - one of the funniest (and reasonably historically accurate) musicals ever made) to do it - I'd pay nine bucks for it. So long as there's a choreographed dance number. (ALL SINGING! ALL DANCING! ALL METAL!) They'd make 100 million easy

SharkTrager: SPna15: satanicsantoku:
BigSnatch: Great, it's being marketed as a teen horror. I can't wait to see all the Instant Black Metal Experts this film will surely produce.

And school is going to be so much fun when it's cool to like black metal. Everyone will be wearing black metal shirts because it's the "cool" thing to do and not because they actually like the music.

/People wearing band shirts for bands that they know nothing about is one of my pet peeves.

Nope, because despite starring the guy from Twilight, this movie will not be a "hit". Count on it.

You are obviously underestimating the fanaticism of teenage girls. They will see anything that features a "teen hearthrob". ANYTHING.

SPna15:
You are obviously underestimating the fanaticism of teenage girls. They will see anything that features a "teen hearthrob". ANYTHING.

Oh, I don't know - will it make them watch a mysoginistic tale of creepy sparkly stalker vampires?

/oh wait

...brutal.