HAHAHAHAHA


GOOD. I hope people take note of the stupid risks he takes.

For those of you keeping score at home, that's Man: 0; Wild: 2

He's still a tough mofo in my book.

Warchild: He's still a tough mofo in my book.

Far tougher then I am at any rate, no matter how many shots they fake.

Also, hot + accent. That's always a win for me.

So, if I'm in lost the wilderness, and I cut my finger on some bamboo, all I have to do is find an airlift. Got it.

wasn't he airlifted a while ago from the south pole?

Warchild: He's still a tough mofo in my book.

Tough? Maybe, but not everyone is going to be able to do dumb shiat in the wilderness, only to have an emergency airlift come in to patch it all back up. All that takes is being a dumbass who's more concerned with showmanship than demonstrating survival, something that works fine enough if you're Bear Grylls, you need to sell a few ads, and camera crews and medical personnel are standing by if anything goes wrong.

But if you're Joe Blow, and you find yourself in deep shiat while on a weekend skiing trip, following Bear's advice will get yourself killed, just as Bear's antics almost get his ass killed, again and again. It's why I can't watch the guy's show anymore. It's like Man vs. Wild is Mad Money, only with more testosterone, chest shots, and pee drinking.

To be fair, bamboo has been used for weaponry, tattoo needles, and even for torture.

It's not like he was airlifted because he was bludgeoned by a shakuhachi...

skandalus: Warchild: He's still a tough mofo in my book.

Tough? Maybe, but not everyone is going to be able to do dumb shiat in the wilderness, only to have an emergency airlift come in to patch it all back up. All that takes is being a dumbass who's more concerned with showmanship than demonstrating survival, something that works fine enough if you're Bear Grylls, you need to sell a few ads, and camera crews and medical personnel are standing by if anything goes wrong.

But if you're Joe Blow, and you find yourself in deep shiat while on a weekend skiing trip, following Bear's advice will get yourself killed, just as Bear's antics almost get his ass killed, again and again. It's why I can't watch the guy's show anymore. It's like Man vs. Wild is Mad Money, only with more testosterone, chest shots, and pee drinking.

If a real survivalist had cut off his finger, he would have dealt with it and accepted the loss. This guy's a star, and doesn't wanna live with the whole "Hey, did that guy gave me the finger---- oh wait LOL" joke for the rest of his professional career, hence why he went and saught out real treatment.

Anywho, 5/10 on the trolling, I bit at least.

He probably found that room service in Vietnam sucks.

/no mint on pillow
//no sale

Chariset: For those of you keeping score at home, that's Man: 0; Wild: 2

bwahahahahaha

done in 2

That sounds like torture!

And he didn't sew it up himself with plant fibers and a bamboo needle? Puss.

Meh...I'll watch survivor man, but Bear's show sucks.

I only watch him to see what he tries to eat next.

I think he should grill a bear for one of his shows.


Bear Grylls Grills Bear

Warchild: He's still a tough mofo in my book.

Yeah. What a hardass (^).

Mind you, bamboo cuts can be pretty nasty

Yes, my sister got bit by one once.

a moose once bit my sister.

Les Stroud > Bear Grylls

And you wonder why the British never had an empire. It's shiat like this that's kept them from having an influence in places like China and Hong Kong, where bamboo abounds.

\it's funny to me, damnit!

Mind you, bamboo cuts can be pretty nasty

The Viet Kong certainly thought so.

Survivor Man rules. Bear and his camera crew and hotels in the jungle can suck it.

The sad part is that at her age, there's a good chance the kid will be born retarded.

the_be_sharps: Warchild: He's still a tough mofo in my book.

Yeah. What a hardass (^).

He did climb Mt. Everest. His show is worse than bullshiat, it's dangerously bad advice, but he really is a pretty tough motherfarker.

He's no Les Stroud.

comslave: The sad part is that at her age, there's a good chance the kid will be born retarded.

LOL WUT



pretty funny, actually. In an existential sort of way.

Actually, it's probably man: 24 wild:2. (not sure how many episodes he has filmed)

But yes, any one who has a "health and safety" team with him is not a survivalist.

comslave: The sad part is that at her age, there's a good chance the kid will be born retarded.

555 wut?

comslave: The sad part is that at her age, there's a good chance the kid will be born retarded.

Wait until you realize what you just did and the irony in that statement.

(Hint: we're talking about big faker Bear Grylls)

Did he take the bamboo with him too?

TheGreatGazoo: Actually, it's probably man: 24 wild:2. (not sure how many episodes he has filmed)

But yes, any one who has a "health and safety" team with him is not a survivalist.

No - his shows are shiat. A much more appropriate title is Man vs Marriott. He may be a good survival expert IRL, but his show is all kinds of stupid. Survivorman, OTOH, had lots of great tips and, though sometimes boring, gives much better insight into the psyche and skills necessary to live.

But did he avoid the tapeworm?

what do people really expect from his show? it's just entertainment and a change of scenery. it's like you want him to bleed to death on air

bachdog: it's like you want him to bleed to death on air

Actually that would be pretty awesome.

As somebody said above, following his advice, if you were in a survival situation, would end up getting you killed.

The truth of the matter is if you got stranded and all you could come up with was info from either survivorman or man vs wild, you'd have a significantly better chance of not dying if you followed Les Stroud's advice.

In other words, if you're stuck in alaska, go fishing, not exploring ice caves under glaciers.

comslave: The sad part is that at her age, there's a good chance the kid will be born retarded.

But will it be born full retard?

Bear Grylls nearly had a stingray moment.

Don't worry there's more time.

This guy needed to cut his own finger the rest of the way off, throw it in the water on a string, pull out the stingray that impaled Steve Irwin, then eat it raw in order to be "manly" in your eyes!

benlonghair: bachdog: it's like you want him to bleed to death on air

Actually that would be pretty awesome.

As somebody said above, following his advice, if you were in a survival situation, would end up getting you killed.

The truth of the matter is if you got stranded and all you could come up with was info from either survivorman or man vs wild, you'd have a significantly better chance of not dying if you followed Les Stroud's advice.

In other words, if you're stuck in alaska, go fishing, not exploring ice caves under glaciers.

You know what would be awesome? A riff track done over his show, where whenever he gives bad advice, you get the Mr. Garrison *BZZT* "Wrong, try again dumb***" and then they explain what you SHOULD do

As others have pointed out, his advice is amazingly bad. Just terrible. But the chances of the type of people who would rely on Bear's advice actually being in those survival situations is pretty remote.

Bear Grylls is a puss. All you have to do is watch the the pilot for his show. "Watch me float down these rapids with nothing but my backpack as a floatation device!" (Oh yeah and the life vest that you can clearly see he is wearing underneath his sweater)

Bear Grylls is to Les Stroud what Carlos Mencia is to Dave Chapelle. Straight up show jacker.

Mudd's woman 2009-05-10 08:15:32 AM
comslave: The sad part is that at her age, there's a good chance the kid will be born retarded.

LOL WUT



pretty funny, actually. In an existential sort of way.

Last words out of the doctors mouth before he was born?

/Just kidding.
//It was funny in a strange way.

i don't think people take notes on what to do either, from watching 'survival' shows. hug a tree or die; if you have matches torch the place

His show is entertainment, like wrestling. Just sit back and enjoy the story they weave.

When Bear saw a elephant dumping and ran over to drink the poo water running the fresh turds. Thats too much. There is hardcore but theres a limit...

When the VC made punji traps, they smeared human excrement on the bamboo spears....seems like that is sorta the case here too. haha

/Les for surviving w/o a hotel room.

Did this happen in the hotel gift shop?


//Les Stroud smirks, laughs to self

Well, this article proves not everyone can be Les Stroud.

Bees are livestock: When Bear saw a elephant dumping and ran over to drink the poo water running the fresh turds. Thats too much. There is hardcore but theres a limit...

........what?

How on Earth this crazy phony pansy boy ever got his show renewed while Les got his ass canned I'll never know.