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(Des Moines Register) Silly College officials across the country don't want to shake hands with the new grads when they give them their diplomas because of swine flu fears   (desmoinesregister.com) divider line 56
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Stimied in a Rut 2009-05-09 09:46:15 PM  
People still care about this? Most overhyped incident in a long time.

Swine Flu Deaths: 1
Regular Flu Deaths: 13000

Which one does the media talk about?

 
Cereal Fetish 2009-05-09 09:46:40 PM  
importantshock.files.wordpress.com

 
Mugato [TotalFark] 2009-05-09 09:49:34 PM  
I first heard about this at USF. Gay. Then again, shaking hands is a filthy habit in the first place.

 
CnFlght 2009-05-09 09:49:39 PM  
confirmed cases topped 2200 today. Yes, two thousand two hundred in less than a month. Still harmless/

 
moothemagiccow 2009-05-09 09:50:10 PM  
Education administrators are dumber than their dumbest students.

 
genner 2009-05-09 09:50:27 PM  
There's like a hundred ninjas in that picture Cereal Fetish.
I don't think they really care.

 
Fenshi 2009-05-09 09:52:06 PM  
I graduated today - they made us use hand sanitizer before shaking hands with them.

 
Obnox [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-05-09 09:54:26 PM  
Forget the hand: shake hands with Mr. Happy.

 
KingoftheCheese 2009-05-09 09:55:05 PM  
My fiance graduated today from college and they didn't shake hands. But then after the ceremony, they had trays of cookies for people and didn't have any sort of serving method other than use your hands to get a cookie. Kind of defeated the purpose, methinks.

 
IonBeam2 2009-05-09 09:59:21 PM  
List of things that have killed more people than Swine Flu:
*bees
*paper clips
*the normal flu
*cavities
*obesity
*cell phones (being dropped from buildings/aircraft)
*pencils

 
lelio 2009-05-09 10:02:22 PM  
Why don't they do a fist bump instead?

 
Alx_xlA 2009-05-09 10:03:01 PM  
Why can't we just bow to each other like they do in the far East?

 
42 by ten 2009-05-09 10:03:28 PM  
So, I could be totally off base here, but don't the hand sanitizers only work as antibacterial agents? Swine flu..H1N1 virus.. yeah. Not like ANY sense has been applied to this mass fearmongering though.

 
AnnoyingKidNextDoor 2009-05-09 10:04:25 PM  
I thought it was because they caught students jacking off in the library?

/married with children ftw

 
Gopher_Girl 2009-05-09 10:04:42 PM  
I'm graduating from college next week, and not real happy about this. I'm tempted to grab the university president's hand and shake it anyway just to be a biatch. "Graduates will be acknowledged with a tip of the hat" according to the newspaper. EPIC FAIL!

/Sick
//Not swine flu
///Not any kind of flu
////Slashies

 
Kevin72 2009-05-09 10:07:16 PM  
Dumb, dumb, dumb. Actually, it's a trial balloon for making sheople really panic when THEY release the real bioengineered virus.

 
Gopher_Girl 2009-05-09 10:07:48 PM  
AnnoyingKidNextDoor: I thought it was because they caught students jacking off in the library?

So Iowa has the problem too? Not surprising. Happens at least once a semester here. Used to work in one of the university libraries.

 
DeadParrotSociety 2009-05-09 10:07:49 PM  
That happened at my commencement today, actually. All graduating students were sent an official email notifying us that they would not be shaking hands due to the threat of swine flu. They also made an annoucement today notifying the audience of the decision. Of course this meant that some smartasses HAD to go and shake everyone's hands. I opted to just go with the flow, in fact, the lack of handshaking seemed to make the whole ceremony go a hell of lot faster.

 
SF_iris [TotalFark] 2009-05-09 10:09:53 PM  
Nice to see such strong critical thinking skills and common sense being developed in our institutions of higher learning.

 
Excen 2009-05-09 10:11:04 PM  
IonBeam2: List of things that have killed more people than Swine Flu:
*bees
*paper clips
*the normal flu
*cavities
*obesity
*cell phones (being dropped from buildings/aircraft)
*pencils


pwbeat.publishersweekly.com

/Do you want to see a magic trick?

 
Four Horsemen of the Domestic Dispute 2009-05-09 10:12:58 PM  
i134.photobucket.com

this is how people without skills get jobs and funding.
Just like Y2K and DST.
Make everybody panic and get money....

 
dervish16108 2009-05-09 10:13:06 PM  
img11.imageshack.us

"WIPE!"

 
mreuther 2009-05-09 10:16:16 PM  
Wash your damn hands, people.

/Are respec nucks still OK?

 
OrganicMisanthropist 2009-05-09 10:16:18 PM  
My university officials all shook hands with the graduates today. At least they're doing ONE thing right. As for those colleges that won't shake hands?
Stop being a bunch of pussies and do your damn job.

 
theknuckler_33 2009-05-09 10:16:40 PM  
Maybe they should just shake elbows like Gene Wilder and Madeline Kahn did in the railroad station scene in Young Frankenstein.

 
Snarfle 2009-05-09 10:16:45 PM  
IonBeam2: You've been here for two years. You don't know not to do this?

Some men, you just can't reach.

/so, you get what we had here last week
//hard boiled eggs are gross

 
Kotecks 2009-05-09 10:17:18 PM  
Graduated today and the Dean didn't even care despite University 'warnings.' We all shook his hand.

 
RhineStoneTaco 2009-05-09 10:18:12 PM  
That's just more proof 99.9% college is useless.

Everyone should either go to trade school for welding, or to college for engineering. The only degree that should be offered in college is engineering.

I dream for a land of only welders and engineers.

 
wademh 2009-05-09 10:22:02 PM  
US cases:
may 4 279
may 5 403
may 6 642
may 7 896 may 8 1639
may 9 2254

 
KingoftheCheese 2009-05-09 10:26:20 PM  
Side note: had lunch at HuHot yesterday. They didn't have any pork products out. I inquired about the lack of pork and sausage on the buffet table and the manager told me that it was because of "swine flu concerns." I told him that it was impossible to get it through pork products and that he was more likely to catch it from one of his customers than from the meat. He scoffed and said "I'll take that into consideration."

 
Show_The_O_Face [TotalFark] 2009-05-09 10:26:58 PM  
I was proud to shake hands with a bunch of people I never met last year.

 
CygnusDarius [TotalFark] 2009-05-09 10:28:11 PM  
IonBeam2: List of things that have killed more people than Swine Flu:
*bees
*paper clips
*the normal flu
*cavities
*obesity
*cell phones (being dropped from buildings/aircraft)
*pencils


*Tripping in the shower.

 
Stiney 2009-05-09 10:30:22 PM  
I had my teacher at the beginning of last week straight up try and fist bump me. I wanted to pull a Kiefer.

 
Bucky Katt [TotalFark] 2009-05-09 10:30:27 PM  
Duh! Everyone knows undergraduates are filthy.

 
Bucky Katt [TotalFark] 2009-05-09 10:43:06 PM  
RhineStoneTaco: That's just more proof 99.9% college is useless.

Everyone should either go to trade school for welding, or to college for engineering. The only degree that should be offered in college is engineering.

I dream for a land of only welders and engineers.


then whose going to unplug my drains?

 
Hongcouver 2009-05-09 10:43:25 PM  
Maybe teach these retards not to lick their fingers in between handshakes and they'll stay healthy.

 
monkeyx 2009-05-09 10:45:52 PM  
Things to do after I get swine flu:

1. Do my girlfriend
2. Burger King late night run
3. Play guitar hero
4. Graduate

 
stoicnimwit 2009-05-09 10:49:49 PM  
I'm sorry, but does hand washing not exist anymore?

 
edmo 2009-05-09 10:53:04 PM  
It's always reassuring to see the heads of higher institutions of learning display such ignorance.

 
wademh 2009-05-09 10:54:10 PM  
Bucky Katt:
RhineStoneTaco: That's just more proof 99.9% college is useless.

Everyone should either go to trade school for welding, or to college for engineering. The only degree that should be offered in college is engineering.

I dream for a land of only welders and engineers.

Bucky Katt
then whose going to unplug my drains?


Perhaps some of your former English teachers.

 
Ailurophile 2009-05-09 11:01:17 PM  
Fenshi: I graduated today - they made us use hand sanitizer before shaking hands with them.

That at least makes a little more sense than providing hand sanitizer AND not shaking hands like somewhere local was doing. (I have no clue where because I generally stop paying real attention when a story is reported for the 5000th time.)

Really all that needs to be done is everybody keeps their hands out of their mouths (we're all over the age of three, right?) and washes their hands before they eat (or put their hands in their mouths, if they just have to).

/or we could all quit overusing things that increase the virulence of communicable diseases and avoiding ALL things that would actually strengthen our immune systems

 
The Smails Kid 2009-05-09 11:03:50 PM  
Bucky Katt: Duh! Everyone knows undergraduates are filthy.

'Cept they're no longer undergraduates once they get the sheepskin.

 
wademh 2009-05-09 11:06:55 PM  
Ailurophile:
/or we could all quit overusing things that increase the virulence of communicable diseases and avoiding ALL things that would actually strengthen our immune systems


Approves
img8.imageshack.us

 
dave2198 2009-05-10 12:13:02 AM  
They did this at the university i work at today. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

 
Occam's Nailfile 2009-05-10 12:23:48 AM  
Justifiably so. Everyone says this thing is no big deal, but with a mortality rate at 2%, and an infection rate that more than doubles the confirmed cases every three days, a LOT of people are going to die. Tons more than in the typical flu season.

www.h1n1data.com (pops)

Click on that image and take a look at the data for yourself. Why people are not taking this more seriously is beyond me.

 
OrganicMisanthropist 2009-05-10 12:25:21 AM  
RhineStoneTaco: That's just more proof 99.9% college is useless.

Everyone should either go to trade school for welding, or to college for engineering. The only degree that should be offered in college is engineering.

I dream for a land of only welders and engineers.


Well, at least you acknowledge that the degree you got in retardation is useless. Acknowledgment is the first step toward recovery.

 
ill_83 [TotalFark] 2009-05-10 01:23:43 AM  
This happened at my graduation last week. The administrators within the college didn't see the point, but it came from the university admins. My mentor and I did an elbow bump instead of shaking hands.

 
dave2198 2009-05-10 02:43:43 AM  
Occam's Nailfile: Justifiably so. Everyone says this thing is no big deal, but with a mortality rate at 2%, and an infection rate that more than doubles the confirmed cases every three days, a LOT of people are going to die. Tons more than in the typical flu season.

(pops)

Click on that image and take a look at the data for yourself. Why people are not taking this more seriously is beyond me.


Not to point out the obvious, but your own graph shows swine flu deaths remaining flatlined while the number of cases skyrocket. Wouldn't this mean that it's not that dangerous?

/is my sarcasm meter broken?

 
cwolf20 [TotalFark] 2009-05-10 02:55:22 AM  
And the crap continues to be flung by the news. The pigs have to fly somehow

 
cwolf20 [TotalFark] 2009-05-10 02:57:15 AM  
Stimied in a Rut
People still care about this? Most overhyped incident in a long time.

Swine Flu Deaths: 1
Regular Flu Deaths: 13000

Which one does the media talk about?


heh, it's up to 2 in the U.S. been behind on the fark articles have you?

 
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